kbfispotter
Posts: 658
Joined: Sat May 14, 2005 5:56 pm

Redneck Pilots?

Sun Oct 29, 2006 5:27 pm

I just found this while surfing the net:

You may be a redneck pilot if...
Your stall warning plays Dixie.
You get your pre-flight briefing from the Phsycic Hotline.
Your cross country flight plan uses flea markets as checkpoints.
You think sectional charts should show trailer parks.
You've ever used moonshine as Avgas.
You have mudflaps on your wheel pants.
Your toothpick keeps poking your mike.
You've ever just taxied around the airport drinking beer.
You wouldn't be caught dead in a Grumman Yankee.
You use a Purina feed sack for a wind sock.
The side of your airplane has a sign advertising your septic tank service.
Your aircraft has a hitch.
You constantly confuse Beechcraft with Beechnut.
You think GPS stands for Going Perfectly Straight.
You refer to formation flying as "we got us a convoy".
You're matched set of luggage is three grocery bags from Piggly Wiggly.
You've ever fueled your airplane from a mason jar.
You've got a gun rack on the passenger window.
You have more than one roll of duct tape holding your cowling together.
Your preflight includes removing all of the clover, grass, and wheat from your landing gear.
You figure the weight of the mud and manure on your airplane into the CG calculations.
You siphon gas from your tractor to put in your airplane.
You've never landed at an actual airport though you've been flying for years.
You've ground looped after hitting a cow.
You consider anything over 100' AGL to be high altitude flight.
There are parts of your airplane labeled John Deere.
You've never actually seen a sectional but have all of the Texaco road maps for your flying area.
There's exhaust residue on the right side of your aircraft and tobacco stains on the left.
You have to buzz the strip to chase off the sheep and goats.
You use your parachute to cover your plane.
You've ever landed on the main street of town to get a cup of coffee.
The tread pattern, if any, on your main tires doesn't match.
Your primary comm. radio has 90 channels.
Your comm antenna is over 7 feet long.
You call up the tower with "Breaker Breaker"
You have fuzzy dice hanging from the magnetic compass.
You put hay in the baggage compartment so your dogs don't get cold.
You use you landing light for hunting.
Your flight instructor's day job is at the community sales barn.
You've got matching bumper stickers on the vertical fin.
There are grass stains on your propeller tips.
The FAA still thinks you live at your parents' house.
Your hangar collapses and more than 4 dogs are injured.
When starting the prop you injure five dogs.
Somewhere on your airplane is an "I'd rather be fishing" bumper sticker.
You navigate with your ADF tuned to exclusively country stations.
When you go to the airport cafe they hand you biscuits and gravy instead of a menu.
You think that an ultralight is a new sissy beer from Budweiser.
You siphon Jat-A out of your King Air for your space heater.
Just before the crash, everybody at the airport heard you say, "Hey, Y'all watch this!!"
 laughing 

Kris
Proud to be an A&P!!!
 
Slovacek747
Posts: 634
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2006 7:10 pm

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Sun Oct 29, 2006 5:52 pm

I love it.. Proud to be a redneck and think the way we do.

Slovacek747
 
skywatch
Posts: 851
Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2005 11:36 am

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:14 am

Quoting KBFIspotter (Thread starter):
You consider anything over 100' AGL to be high altitude flight.

 Big grin I've seen this before via email...it's hilarious. Thanks for sharing.

--Skywatch
------Forever Watchin' The Sky------
 
NeilYYZ
Posts: 2443
Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2006 12:55 pm

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:30 am

Most people call me a redneck because I like NASCAR, Budweiser, drinking in a garage and work construction in the summers. I go to University and proudly wear my NASCAR coat around campus, and if people want to call me a redneck, fine by me.
It may be too early to drink scotch... But it is NEVER too early to think about it...
 
MD-90
Posts: 7835
Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2000 12:45 pm

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:35 am

Quoting KBFIspotter (Thread starter):
You wouldn't be caught dead in a Grumman Yankee.

 thumbsup 

Quoting KBFIspotter (Thread starter):
You refer to formation flying as "we got us a convoy".

 thumbsup 
 
AerospaceFan
Posts: 6990
Joined: Thu Dec 22, 2005 1:43 am

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:53 am

There's a difference between a "redneck" and "good ol' boy", frankly. The bigoted, racist and other negative connotations of being "redneck" are absent if one is a "good ol' boy".

Captain Martin in Cool Hand Luke might have been a redneck, but as it turned out, Sheriff Coltrane in The Dukes of Hazzard and the Duke boys themselves were good ol' boys.

One might recall, with pleasure, the "Ballad of the Dukes of Hazzard County"....

http://www.lyricsdownload.com/waylon...-hazzard-good-ol--boys-lyrics.html

One man's opinion.

By the way, this thread lends a whole new meaning to the phrase, "The South will rise again." Into the wild blue yonder... y'all.

 

[Edited 2006-10-29 19:02:49]
What's fair is fair.
 
Queso
Posts: 3109
Joined: Sat Jul 08, 2006 12:28 pm

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 4:00 am

Quoting KBFIspotter (Thread starter):
You have more than one roll of duct tape holding your cowling together.

Very funny stuff, thanks for posting!

And thanks GP for cleaning up the thread.  Wink
 
bhmbaglock
Posts: 2489
Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2005 7:51 am

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 12:55 pm

Here's a few more:

- Your a/c has a three point hitch and a PTO
- Cage in the back of the a/c for hunting dogs
- All the seats in the a/c came from the Bass Pro Shops catalog
- You've converted the toolbox on one nacelle into a cooler and the other into a live bait well
- You bought a twin so you could strap a deer on the hood without worrying about the exhaust or prop messing it up
- NRA sticker in the window of your a/c

Here are a few from L-188 from an earlier thread:

Quote:
You lay a blue tarp in the front yard so everybody that flies over in an airplane will think you have a pool.

Edit: Thought of one for you guys here......If your boat and airplane are powered by the same engine...you might be a redneck.

And yes, I'm the one who pointed out that the first boat I got to drive when I was a kid had a Continental(not Ford/Lincoln) engine.

[Edited 2006-10-30 04:57:01]
Where are all of my respected members going?
 
L-188
Posts: 29881
Joined: Wed Jul 07, 1999 11:27 am

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 4:47 pm

Quoting BHMBAGLOCK (Reply 7):
And yes, I'm the one who pointed out that the first boat I got to drive when I was a kid had a Continental(not Ford/Lincoln) engine.

A lot of old O-235's end up there.

Ray Stevens did a song a few years back called, "Southern Air" my favorite line is the pilot, (Jerry Clower) getting on the PA system and tellng the passengers, "Now yall don't worry about that landing none....my brother put on a new set of them new Goodyear Mudripper tires!!!!"

Always picture a supercub with lugged tundra tires when I remember that phrase.
OBAMA-WORST PRESIDENT EVER....Even SKOORB would be better.
 
Queso
Posts: 3109
Joined: Sat Jul 08, 2006 12:28 pm

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 9:47 pm

Quoting L-188 (Reply 8):
Always picture a supercub with lugged tundra tires when I remember that phrase.

 
bhmbaglock
Posts: 2489
Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2005 7:51 am

RE: Redneck Pilots?

Mon Oct 30, 2006 9:53 pm

Quoting L-188 (Reply 8):
A lot of old O-235's end up there.

This was a relatively new one actually. Some druggies crash-landed a Cessna on his property in the Everglades so my uncle just liberated the engine and put a fixed pitch prop on it then mounted it to the back of an airboat. Faster than it needed to be for sure.
Where are all of my respected members going?

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