Emirates773ER
Topic Author
Posts: 1318
Joined: Mon Jun 27, 2005 9:10 am

No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 12:29 am

What do you expect from such simple creatures?


Your last name stays put.


The garage is all yours.


Wedding plans take care of themselves.


Chocolate is just another snack.


You can be President.


You can never be pregnant.


You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.


Car mechanics tell you the truth.


The world is your urinal.


You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.


You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.


Same work, more pay.


Wrinkles add character.


Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental- $100.


People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.


The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.


New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.


One mood all the time.


Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.


You know stuff about tanks.


A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.


You can open all your own jars.


You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.


If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.


Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.


Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.


You almost never have strap problems in public.


You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.


Everything on your face stays its original color.


The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.


You only have to shave your face and neck.


You can play with toys all your life.


Your belly usually hides your big hips.


One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.


You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.


You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.


You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..


You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.


Suddenly I feel a lot happier....
The Truth is Out There ---- Face It!!!!!
 
Pyrex
Posts: 4051
Joined: Thu Aug 25, 2005 7:24 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 12:44 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Your last name stays put.

Actually a woman's can (and, IMO, should) stay as well.

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can be President.

Only if you're white and Christian  stirthepot 

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

They might be less propense to lie to you, but still...

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):

The world is your urinal.

 checkmark   bigthumbsup 

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

No, you just turn it in one direction and do it by trial-and-error Big grin

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

Why carry so much stuff? Since when is a suitcase not enough?

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):

You can open all your own jars.

Unless they are child-proof jars, in which case you've got to ask your kids for help.  Smile
Read this very carefully, I shall write this only once!
 
MCOflyer
Posts: 7071
Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 5:51 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 1:28 am

We get the place to ourselves.

Hunter
Never be afraid to stand up for who you are.
 
CO7e7
Posts: 2686
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2004 3:39 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 1:35 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You know stuff about tanks.

Only if you're ANCflyer!  biggrin 

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

soooo true!

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Suddenly I feel a lot happier....

Same here.. thanks for posting.  bigthumbsup 
 
seb146
Posts: 14060
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 1999 7:19 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 1:51 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Wedding plans take care of themselves.

HA!! I remember my brother's wedding. Everyone was getting calls every day from him AND from her about EVERYTHING!

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can be President.

What law says that?

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

But should you? It is a privilege not a right

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Car mechanics tell you the truth.

Not always. I had the tie rods on my PT replaced and they said it was fixed. That is why my PT is in the shop now for the same noise!

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

You would think....

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

Unless you are McDreamy....

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

I have a pair of Pumas and two pair of Adidas that would disagree

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
One mood all the time.

I have yet to see that one

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

Since when?

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

I just bought a new bag for my Salt Lake trip and I know that will not be the only one!

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

For those who don't care about comfort

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

Said to the man that has 63 pair

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Everything on your face stays its original color.

Grey is a good color for a beard or mustache?

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

That is why so many teens want the Donald Trump look.....

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You only have to shave your face and neck.

And chest, and back, and.... well, you get the idea

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.

Black is the new black except for brown, yellow, blue, red, purple, white.....

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

Again, a privilege not a right.....

GO CANUCKS!!
Patriotic and Proud Liberal
 
GQfluffy
Posts: 3072
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 1:25 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 1:55 am

Quoting Seb146 (Reply 4):
Not always. I had the tie rods on my PT replaced and they said it was fixed. That is why my PT is in the shop now for the same noise!

It's not our fault you were stupid and bought a PT Cruiser...
This isn't where I parked my car...
 
CO7e7
Posts: 2686
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2004 3:39 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:04 am

Quoting GQfluffy (Reply 5):
It's not our fault you were stupid and bought a PT Cruiser...

 rotfl   rotfl 

That's funny!
 
seb146
Posts: 14060
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 1999 7:19 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:23 am

Quoting GQfluffy (Reply 5):
It's not our fault you were stupid and bought a PT Cruiser...

It was that, a Sentra, or a Neon. Besides, I have never had any problems with any Chrysler product. The PT has run well and I look good in it. Internal combustion; the ultimate accessory! It is not my fault the mechanics could not hear the rattling my passengers and I were hearing!

Truth be told, I would like an XB, VW Golf, or a hard top Jeep.

GO CANUCKS!!
Patriotic and Proud Liberal
 
kmh1956
Posts: 2854
Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:08 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:37 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

As a woman who has to look at these legs, I disagree!
'Somebody tell me why I'm on my own if there's a soulmate for everyone' :Natasha Bedingfield
 
ShyFlyer
Posts: 4698
Joined: Fri Jun 19, 2009 11:38 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:38 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

But new combat boots do though. For me at least.

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

Oops, I have four.  Embarrassment  Big grin
I lift things up and put them down.
 
Doona
Posts: 3382
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 9:43 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:38 am

Quoting Seb146 (Reply 4):

I have a pair of Pumas and two pair of Adidas that would disagree

Sheesh, who get's blisters from sneakers? Wear some socks, bubba.  duck 

Cheers
Mats
Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
 
Emirates773ER
Topic Author
Posts: 1318
Joined: Mon Jun 27, 2005 9:10 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:13 am

Quoting Seb146 (Reply 4):
Seb146

Tak a chill pill and stop being so uptight!
The Truth is Out There ---- Face It!!!!!
 
seb146
Posts: 14060
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 1999 7:19 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:19 am

Quoting Doona (Reply 10):
Sheesh, who get's blisters from sneakers? Wear some socks, bubba.

LOL If we can't laugh at ourselves, what is the point? I know Bugs Bunny said it, but someone on this board uses a signature that says something like: Never take life seriously. We don't get out of it alive!

GO CANUCKS!!
Patriotic and Proud Liberal
 
asuflyer05
Posts: 2054
Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2004 8:53 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:32 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

I would argue there are some guys who should not walk around a water park in a white-tee or sans white-tee.
 
WestJetYQQ
Posts: 2763
Joined: Thu Jan 18, 2007 1:31 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:39 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can be President.
You know stuff about tanks.

 rotfl 

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Women can't do this?  Wink

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

I disagree with that one. I never use a restroom at a gas station.

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

I tried..... and failed..... ouch.

Cheers
Carson
Will You Try to Change Things? Use the Power that you have, the Power of a Million new Ideas.
 
kmh1956
Posts: 2854
Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:08 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:59 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Chocolate is just another snack.

Chocolate is nature's most perfect food.....next to Lasagne and Tiramisu.

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can be President.

It ain't far off, boys.....

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can never be pregnant.

Not at my age!!!

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Car mechanics tell you the truth.

Car mechanics have no choice BUT to tell me the truth.

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Wrinkles add character.

And I have a bridge to sell you!!

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

It is at MY house...

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

Who needs more than that?

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can open all your own jars.

Always have, always will.

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

Whatever works....


And I'm considered a 'girly' girl.....
'Somebody tell me why I'm on my own if there's a soulmate for everyone' :Natasha Bedingfield
 
Dougloid
Posts: 7248
Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:44 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 4:30 am

Quoting Kmh1956 (Reply 15):
Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Chocolate is just another snack.

Chocolate is nature's most perfect food.....next to Lasagne and Tiramisu.

Blorp.

Quoting Kmh1956 (Reply 15):
Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can be President.

It ain't far off, boys.....

Who cares? A non issue.

Quoting Kmh1956 (Reply 15):
Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Car mechanics tell you the truth.

Car mechanics have no choice BUT to tell me the truth.

If you ARE a competent mechanic you need never cross this bridge because you will know the truth.
If you believe in coincidence, you haven't looked close enough-Joe Leaphorn
 
ACDC8
Posts: 7205
Joined: Thu Mar 10, 2005 6:56 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 4:34 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):

But there is one thing that can turn all this bliss, that can turn being a man into a nightmare .........

Male Pattern Baldness

be afraid, be very afraid .....  cry 


Other than that, that list is pretty gosh darn accurate.
A Grumpy German Is A Sauerkraut
 
Sabena332
Posts: 14938
Joined: Wed May 09, 2001 3:57 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 4:43 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Nope, one of the boxer shorts I wear cost thrice as much.  Wink

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

I agree. I even only need an onboard trolley for five days.  Silly

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

No, some of my phone conversations last up to two hours! Big grin

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You only have to shave your face and neck.

Not me.

Patrick
NZ1's mother is a disgusting crack-whore and his father is a worthless alcoholic!
 
MCOflyer
Posts: 7071
Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 5:51 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 5:19 am

Quoting ShyFlyer (Reply 9):
Oops, I have four.

I have 5.

Hunter
Never be afraid to stand up for who you are.
 
sandrozrh
Posts: 2420
Joined: Sun Feb 04, 2007 12:19 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 5:24 am

 rotfl  Most points are very true, but i disagree on one or the other.

Quoting CO7e7 (Reply 3):
Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You know stuff about tanks.

Only if you're ANCflyer!

Ancieboy isn't the only tanker on here  bigthumbsup 
 
LH526
Crew
Posts: 1960
Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2000 2:23 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 5:27 am

Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can be President.

? A woman can't be president?
Trittst im Morgenrot daher, seh ich dich im Strahlenmeer ...
 
tz757300
Posts: 2725
Joined: Mon Aug 08, 2005 6:21 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 5:34 am

Quoting LH526 (Reply 21):

? A woman can't be president?

Umm...they can. He was poking fun at the low likelihood of a woman president or that we have never had one
LETS GO MOUNTAINEERS!
 
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WildcatYXU
Posts: 2611
Joined: Sat May 06, 2006 2:05 pm

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 12:18 pm

Quoting WestJetYQQ (Reply 14):
Quoting Emirates773ER (Thread starter):
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Women can't do this? Wink

As a matter of fact, they can. At least in Ontario. Heck, they could even walk sans shirt down Bay Street. Sadly, I didn't see any actually doing it.
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ABQ747
Posts: 646
Joined: Wed Dec 20, 2006 8:22 am

RE: No Wonder Men Are Happier.....

Tue Jun 05, 2007 12:31 pm

Quoting Seb146 (Reply 4):
Not always. I had the tie rods on my PT replaced and they said it was fixed. That is why my PT is in the shop now for the same noise!



Quoting GQfluffy (Reply 5):
It's not our fault you were stupid and bought a PT Cruiser...

That's why I call it a PT LOSER!!!  devil 
The reason New Mexico is so windy is because Texas sucks and Arizona blows.

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