halls120
Topic Author
Posts: 8724
Joined: Sun Jun 05, 2005 3:24 am

Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 2:03 am

I recently chose a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"

He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco or drink alcoholic beverages?"

"No," I replied. "I don't do drugs, either."

Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"

I said, "No, my other doctor said that all red meat is unhealthy!"

"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, boating, fishing or relaxing in the beach?"

"No, I don't," I said.

He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?"

"No," I said. "I don't do any of those things."

Then he looked at me and asked, "Then why do you give a shit?"
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
Jpax
Posts: 715
Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2006 5:01 am

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 2:08 am

Quoting Halls120 (Thread starter):
He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?"

"No," I said. "I don't do any of those things."

Thats alright, you aren't alone.  Wink

Signed,

Sex-Deprived Anutters.
 
ORFflyer
Posts: 3142
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 2:42 am

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 2:17 am

Quoting Halls120 (Thread starter):
"Then why do you give a shit?"

 rotf   rotf   rotf   rotf   rotf   rotf 

You better start one, or more of those.....  Wink
 
WestJetYQQ
Posts: 2763
Joined: Thu Jan 18, 2007 1:31 pm

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 3:09 am

Quoting Jpax (Reply 1):
Thats alright, you aren't alone. Wink

Signed,

Sex-Deprived Anutters.

I second that!

'Cept some of us spend too much time in the sun. I got a good burn from spotting for 8 hours at YVR on Wednesday!

That's hilarious though.

Cheers
Carson
Will You Try to Change Things? Use the Power that you have, the Power of a Million new Ideas.
 
kmh1956
Posts: 2854
Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:08 am

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 3:41 am

That's a HOWL!!!
I've just copy/pasted it and sent it to everyone I know!!!
'Somebody tell me why I'm on my own if there's a soulmate for everyone' :Natasha Bedingfield
 
N1120A
Posts: 26468
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2003 5:40 pm

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 5:28 am

Quoting Halls120 (Thread starter):

Very funny. I have seen similar lists before and they never cease to entertain.
Mangeons les French fries, mais surtout pratiquons avec fierte le French kiss
 
User avatar
HAWK21M
Posts: 30002
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 6:35 pm

After all those precautions......Its still depends on LUCK  Smile
regds
MEL
I may not win often, but I damn well never lose!!! ;)
 
WunalaYann
Posts: 2128
Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2005 12:55 am

RE: Will I Live To Be 80?

Sat Jul 07, 2007 7:43 pm

Quote: "Will I live to be 80?".

Depends. Do you think a.net will still be there in eighty years' time?  Smile

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