tsaord
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Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 1:00 am

The question is directed to the men. If you were not married and found out your girlfriend was pregnant and she didn't want the child to have your last name would that cause trouble or it is not that important?

I ask after I was reading about Tom Brady. His son has his middle names in reverse order but the boy does not have Brady's last name. That was the first I heard of the child not carrying the fathers name unless the father was not in the child's life.
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BigOrange
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 4:24 pm

My neice doesn't have her father's last name, thank god!
 
ajd1992
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 5:30 pm

I'd be a bit annoyed, considering without a man, the child wouldn't exist.

Plus the fact that the bride gets the grooms name anyway makes enough sense.
 
EWRCabincrew
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 5:34 pm

Quoting Ajd1992 (Reply 2):
Plus the fact that the bride gets the grooms name anyway makes enough sense.

We flipped a coin. I lost. Spent the first 40 years of my life with a name that no one can spell or pronounce and now I can spend the rest of it with another name no one can spell or pronounce.

As for the child getting the last name, it would make no difference to me. As long as your child is healthy, does it really matter in the grand scheme of things?
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Doona
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 5:44 pm

Quoting Tsaord (Thread starter):
The question is directed to the men. If you were not married and found out your girlfriend was pregnant and she didn't want the child to have your last name would that cause trouble or it is not that important?

It's important to me and if my partner would not mind, I'd like for my last name to continue on. I'm the only male Doona in all of Sweden, and it would be kinda cool to think that the name would be carried on.

Here's hoping I'll get myself a son...

Cheers
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KROC
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 6:24 pm

GIMMIE BACAK MY SON!

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VC10BOAC
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 9:40 pm

My son has a double hyphenated last name. Mine first then hers. His mom and I were friends in high school, lost each other for 15 yrs, dated after that, never got married. I have no problem with his last name, although my father does. (My son is only 5 so when he gets older I will convince him to reverse the order!)
 
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LTU932
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 9:45 pm

If I ever want children, I prefer if they take their mother's name. Nobody knows how to pronounce and/or write my name correctly, even when I dictate the name to someone. So, for simplicity's sake and for personal reasons, I want my children to have the mother's name.

In Latin America, it's impossible for something like that to happen, because by law, the child automatically acquires as first last name the name of the father, and as a second last name, the name of the mother. They haven't liberalised naming conventions the way it has been done in the US or in Europe. Hell, in Europe men could theoretically take the last name of their wifes when getting married. I wouldn't mind doing that myself.  Wink
 
N1120A
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 9:48 pm

Quoting Ajd1992 (Reply 2):


Plus the fact that the bride gets the grooms name anyway makes enough sense.

That isn't always the case. Some women choose to keep their maiden name. In fact; in some places, including Iran, the tradition is for women to keep their maiden name. Also, one of my close friend's and his wife chose to combine their last names in a hyphenated form. Hers first, then his.

Quoting Ajd1992 (Reply 2):
I'd be a bit annoyed, considering without a man, the child wouldn't exist.

And? Without a woman, the child wouldn't exist either.
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LAXspotter
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 10:46 pm

Quoting N1120A (Reply 8):
Some women choose to keep their maiden name

my mom did, but when we moved to the US, she chose to use my dad's name for legal reasons.
"Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel" Samuel Johnson
 
airtran737
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 11:20 pm

Quoting Tsaord (Thread starter):
The question is directed to the men. If you were not married and found out your girlfriend was pregnant and she didn't want the child to have your last name would that cause trouble or it is not that important?

For me it is an absolute must. I know my reason is a bit archaic, but it all boils down to carrying on the family name. When I was growing up there were only two males left to carry on the "Cross" name, myself and my cousin Bob. Bob had a son, so we know it survives at least on more generation. I haven't settled down yet, but when I do it will be for certain that the children will have my surname. We also lucked out because my dad got re-married and had two more sons, so now there are a total of four of us to keep the name alive.
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MCOflyer
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Mon Oct 15, 2007 11:53 pm

Well in my step sisters case, Alyssa kept the dads last name providing my sister picked out the middle name.

Hunter
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AirframeAS
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Tue Oct 16, 2007 12:26 am

Quoting N1120A (Reply 8):
Some women choose to keep their maiden name....

Actually, more and more women in the U.S. is actually doing that now. It saves alot of time having to go to Social Security, calling credit cards, getting a new drivers license, among other reasons too. Some of the other reasons have to do with their protection in case if something goes wrong in the marriage, or so I'm told.
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
ScarletHarlot
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Tue Oct 16, 2007 12:36 am

I use both my maiden and husband's names, like Hilary Rodham Clinton. My maiden name could also be a first name, so to make it clear, I use the hyphenated version at work. So say I was Scarlet O'Hara before I got married, and now am Scarlet Harlot - I usually go by Scarlet O'Hara Harlot in most cases and Scarlet O'Hara-Harlot at work.

If Mr. Harlot and I were to have kids, they would have his last name, but even if it was a boy, I would want my maiden name to be one of his middle names. This is how it is done in Portuguese - the mother's maiden name becomes the kid's middle name.

But does a kid have to have the dad's name? Absolutely not. It's a personal decision. One of my speedskating coaches has the last name Dick. His kids have their mom's last name - and he and the mom are married and together.
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AirframeAS
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Tue Oct 16, 2007 1:41 am

Quoting ScarletHarlot (Reply 13):

You must have missed this........  sarcastic 

Quoting Tsaord (Thread starter):
The question is directed to the men.
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
ScarletHarlot
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Tue Oct 16, 2007 3:40 am

Quoting AirframeAS (Reply 14):
You must have missed this........

Oh no, I didn't miss it. I couldn't resist putting in my two cents anyway.  Wink
But that was when I ruled the world
 
bok269
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Wed Oct 17, 2007 3:06 am

For me, having my children carry on my name will be very important. My name has always given me a sense of pride, and having my kids carry that over is very important to me. Call me old-fashioned, but that's how I feel on the matter. I'm not in favor of hyphenating my children's last name either. Getting into seperations pre-birth is hairy. Hopefully, it will never be something Ill have to deal with.
"Reality is wrong, dreams are for real." -Tupac
 
ScarletHarlot
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:42 am

Quoting Bok269 (Reply 16):
My name has always given me a sense of pride, and having my kids carry that over is very important to me.

Me too. But because some guys are...

Quoting Bok269 (Reply 16):
old-fashioned

...some girls don't get to have that same experience of having their offspring carry their names too. That's not fair.
But that was when I ruled the world
 
NeilYYZ
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Wed Oct 17, 2007 8:07 am

I personally don't much care. I don't expect any future wife of mine to take my last name, and when it comes to the kids I suppose they could have both, one, or the other. In the end, I'm proud to have my fathers last name, but, if my mother hadn't taken my fathers last name when they got married I'd be equally proud to carry my mothers last name.
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Pyrex
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Wed Oct 17, 2007 7:29 pm

Quoting Ajd1992 (Reply 2):
Plus the fact that the bride gets the grooms name anyway makes enough sense.

Why in the hell? She gets it if she wants to - this is not the Middle Ages anymore, you know, marriage is not a deed of property. I for one would never marry a woman who insisted on taking my last name after marriage.

Quoting ScarletHarlot (Reply 17):
Me too. But because some guys are...

Quoting Bok269 (Reply 16):
old-fashioned

...some girls don't get to have that same experience of having their offspring carry their names too. That's not fair.

If a guy refuses to let the woman give her last name as well to the kid that is not being old-fashioned, that is pure, straight up misogyny. Girls, if you ever find a guy like that leave him, he's not worth sticking around for (this coming from a guy).

More to the point: a kid should have both his mother and his father names, in whatever order, and in the same quantity - if he has two last names from the father he should have two last names from the mother as well. I know that in Portugal you cannot even register a kid with only one parent (on the birth certificate you need to have both the father's and the mother's name).
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AirframeAS
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Thu Oct 18, 2007 9:23 am

Some guys don't care, MOST guys do care. The main reason why: to keep the family name going in the family tree. The men always hope it will be a boy when the baby is born.
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
bok269
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Fri Oct 19, 2007 3:37 am

Quoting ScarletHarlot (Reply 17):

...some girls don't get to have that same experience of having their offspring carry their names too. That's not fair.



Quoting Pyrex (Reply 19):
If a guy refuses to let the woman give her last name as well to the kid that is not being old-fashioned, that is pure, straight up misogyny. Girls, if you ever find a guy like that leave him, he's not worth sticking around for (this coming from a guy).

More to the point: a kid should have both his mother and his father names, in whatever order, and in the same quantity - if he has two last names from the father he should have two last names from the mother as well. I know that in Portugal you cannot even register a kid with only one parent (on the birth certificate you need to have both the father's and the mother's name).

Don't get me wrong. I completely understand that. I would prefer to have my kids carry on my last name, but am more than willing to meet my future wife's wishes as well when the time comes.
"Reality is wrong, dreams are for real." -Tupac
 
Falcon84
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Fri Oct 19, 2007 12:51 pm

Quoting KROC (Reply 5):
GIMMIE BACAK MY SON!

Signed, Mel Gibson

Typical airline exec.  Big grin
Work Right, Fly Hard
 
JJJ
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RE: Does Your Child Need Your Last Name?

Fri Oct 19, 2007 1:19 pm

Quoting LTU932 (Reply 7):
In Latin America, it's impossible for something like that to happen, because by law, the child automatically acquires as first last name the name of the father, and as a second last name, the name of the mother. They haven't liberalised naming conventions the way it has been done in the US or in Europe

Don't know for the rest of the countries, but in Chile the parents may decide which order to put the surnames at birth, just like in Spain.

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