Fly2HMO
Posts: 7207
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 12:14 pm

For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 3:42 am

***Warning: Severe Rant and swearing follows***

So I bumped into this "Ode to the nice guy" thing, and I don't know who the hell wrote it but I think its brilliant. I can relate 100% to this, and yes I have the nice guy syndrome and I'm damn proud of it.

I've ran into many girls, no wait... I meant BITCHES, that could've saved themselves a lot of trouble and drama. But no, once a bitch, always a bitch...

So this is dedicated to all my brethren with the nice guy syndrome, and to those bitches that need to turn their god damn brains on:
---------------
"Ode to the Nice Guy

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming."

-------------

I'm not looking for help here, And before you start saying I'm never gonna get a girl with this attitude, don't bother, I'm taking a break from looking for girls for a while because I'm sick of getting involved with nothing but bitches. So right now I'm single and loving it. I'm done fishing for now, but if I get fished, well, I'm not gonna put up much of a fight Big grin

I do have two very good female friends I care for very much and respect a lot, so this is meant for all those other dumb bitches roaming around.

From:

http://www.stwing.upenn.edu/~jenf/writing/rant04.html
 
sw733
Posts: 5307
Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2004 6:19 am

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 3:49 am

Yeah I've heard this one about a million times. I used to think nice guys ever won, and they rarely do, but I did. I got an amazing, smart, successful, stunningly beautiful girlfriend who I love dearly and truly enjoy being with. She is way above me in the whole league spectrum, but neither of us care...and I won her by being nice while the guy she had been dating was a complete jerk, and a loser to boot - I think he works the 12am-8am shift at a gas station now (I am an aerospace engineer, she is an economist at the Federal Reserve Bank of Kansas City)...now, working at a gas station is not a bad job, even at that shift, but the fact that he has no desire or determination to make anything more of himself is what killed it for her.

So while nice guys usually come in last when you're between, say, 16 and 24...after that, they start winning. I got lucky that I wont at 21, she was 22...now I am 23, she's 24. I got very, very lucky  Smile
 
da man
Posts: 836
Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2001 8:27 am

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:07 am

Quoting SW733 (Reply 1):
I used to think nice guys ever won, and they rarely do, but I did. I got an amazing, smart, successful, stunningly beautiful girlfriend who I love dearly and truly enjoy being with. She is way above me in the whole league spectrum, but neither of us care...and I won her by being nice while the guy she had been dating was a complete jerk, and a loser to boot ...
So while nice guys usually come in last when you're between, say, 16 and 24...after that, they start winning.

Amen, I've always been the nice guy and also the awkward guy who wasn't interested for up until about 3 years ago. Now I've struck the jackpot...

I ended up taking one of my few female friends to Homecoming two years ago as a favor because her parents forbade her from taking her boyfriend (who was actually her fiance but the parents didn't know). We had as much fun as you can have without dancing too close to each-other. As time went by her fiance began to resent me because I was taking to her more than he was. I graduated before we got involved (although it was close in coming). She broke off the engagement after I graduated for good reason (her fiance was charged with felony murder and since gotten off on a technicality). Then as I went off to university her parents decided to move back to Louisiana. We have talked at least once every 3 days since and have amazingly become bf/gf. She came back to town to tour a university in town which is offering her a full-ride and see me for the first time since she moved two years ago. During that brief span, she proposed! I was thinking that our relationship was getting very serious and I had indeed thought that she was "the one", but apparently she felt the same way and acted on the feelings sooner. Needless to say, we are now engaged, and the nice guys do win in the long run!
War Eagle!
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9811
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:20 am

Quoting FLY2HMO (Thread starter):

Thanks for summing me up in a thread. Thats definately me, seriously.
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
National757
Posts: 471
Joined: Mon Jul 16, 2007 3:05 am

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:47 am

From a random girl on MySpace. All you nice guys out there, read this:

Quote:
I don't care enough to think up an original response, so here's an entry from a blog I wrote awhile ago:

Nice guys finish last", eh?

You want to know WHY "nice guys" finish last? Because the ones that are calling themselves nice guys are just pussies. No spine, nothing even resembling a backbone. These self proclaimed "nice guys" are pushovers, willing to say yes to anybody any time because they're insecure, self-doubting, and ego-centric. They want everybody to love them, they fall for every girl who gives them the time of day, and then suffocate everybody around them with constant requests for reassurance, no matter how subtle they may be.

TRUE nice guys aren't pushovers; they're just respectful. They give the treatment people warrant and are observant enough to realize when somebody needs to be told no. They're smarter than the average guy, and tend not to think with their penis ALL the time. They're the ones who will hold the door open for you, but who will expect you to pay your own bills while at the same time picking up the tab for the dinner he invited you out to.

A real nice guy will tell you if an outfit looks horrible, but will do it with tact. A real nice guy will be honest without being abrasive and will respect your opinion without agreeing with it just because it might make you like him more.

To all of the "nice guys" that are "finishing last": You're not a nice person if you're not real. Develop a personality of your own, speak for yourself, create some opinions, and grow a spine. Don't be a pushover, be a person. Maybe then you'll win a race or two.
 
flymia
Posts: 6810
Joined: Thu Jun 14, 2001 6:33 am

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:47 am

Quoting FLY2HMO (Thread starter):
time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to

This line is just great  Big grin !!!!
Yea I consider myself a nice guy too, I can related to some of this. But I dont think it is that bad. And as others have pointed out you just have to find the right girl.
"It was just four of us on the flight deck, trying to do our job" (Captain Al Haynes)
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9811
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:50 am

Quoting National757 (Reply 4):

Damn, that girl was harsh. I'd date her and then bitch slap her!  Silly
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
phatfarmlines
Posts: 1238
Joined: Thu Sep 27, 2001 12:06 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 5:20 am

Quoting AirframeAS (Reply 6):
Damn, that girl was harsh. I'd date her and then bitch slap her!

From a guy's perspective, I would have to agree. Stop being nice and start telling her she looks fat or anorexic in that dress, or tell her that her nephew looks like a monkey when she asks you if he's cute. That's a great conversation starter!
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7207
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 12:14 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 5:44 am

Quoting National757 (Reply 4):
From a random girl on MySpace. All you nice guys out there, read this:


Ironic isn't it?

She's confusing nice guys with suck-ups, which I definitely am not, and I'm sure most of us self respecting nice guys aren't.

[Edited 2007-10-21 22:46:01]

[Edited 2007-10-21 22:46:27]
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9811
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 5:56 am

Quoting Phatfarmlines (Reply 7):
From a guy's perspective, I would have to agree.

Agree with me or with the girl who wrote it?
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7207
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 12:14 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 5:56 am

Oh, and check out this website, its a serious yet funny analysis on so called bitches:

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html
 
starrion
Posts: 972
Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2003 1:19 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 6:32 am

I was a nice guy.

Best friend to the cute/smart girls who never gave me the time of day until they "needed to talk to someone"

Drove inebriated hotties home so they won't get molested- check
Comforted suitemate in college after BF got tired of her Sh*T and told her so- check
Supported friend through rough spot and helped her with house repairs- check


Guess what? THEY DON'T FALL "IN LOVE" WITH DOORMATS!

She's calling while your playing GTA? Hello voicemail.
She "needs you"? You're busy.
She puts on a sack dress- Tell her so. (Clothes are supposed to flatter you. You would look better with nothing on.)
Let her know that you are NOT one of her girlfriends.


I stopped being a Nice Guy AKA Doormat. I am still "nice" to my wife. She puts on an ugly dress- "You're not wearing that are you? Never wear that. Wear stuff that flatters you. Just say no to sacks."

I have a wife (that cute/funny/smart girl) because I learned.

We dated and I played the doormat. She dumped me.

She expected the worst. (I miss you, please take me back. Waahh!)

I didn't call. I didn't roll up in a ball. I went back to the gym. Got on with my life. Got on Dating sites. Told our shared friends "Yup. I blew it. But I've got these other dates and I won't do that again."

She dated some other chump. And had an epiphany.

The second time around, I told her what my plans for the evening were- would she like to join me? Otherwise she was free to do something else by herself.

I have my opinions and thoughts. I grew a spine and a brain. I still treat her well.

Don't be a doormat. If they don't respect you, they will never feel "that way" about you.
Knowledge Replaces Fear
 
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aerorobnz
Posts: 7486
Joined: Sat Feb 10, 2001 3:43 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 10:29 am

You forgot to add the last paragraph...."For all those 'Nice Guys' who are under the thumb of a female, Who put up with all their shit without any of the perks of being a boyfriend - like seeing her naked on the end of your cock regularly, it's because she thinks you are gay - either grow some balls or start sucking someone else's you big girl's blouse..."

'Nice' is such a weak describing word. Call me anything you like, just don't insult me by settling for 'nice' as a description of me.
Flown to 120 Airports in 44 Countries on 73 Operators. Visited 55 Countries and counting. Wanderlust is like Syphilis, once you have the itch it's too late for treatment.
 
stlgph
Posts: 9057
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:19 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 12:50 pm

eh, i say stop putting so much thought into it. start with "hello" and end with "goodbye"

there's your relationship right there.

ideally, sometimes those words arent even necessary.  Wink
if assumptions could fly, airliners.net would be the world's busiest airport
 
zak
Posts: 1926
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 12:17 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 1:33 pm

Quoting National757 (Reply 4):

Quote:

amen.
10=2
 
User avatar
HAWK21M
Posts: 29867
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 1:37 pm

Yeah I know exactly how a nice guy never wins,until he stopped being a saint & continued to be good to people that deserve that goodness.From there on The Nice guy begame Clever guy & won more than he lost  Smile

regds
MEL
I may not win often, but I damn well never lose!!! ;)
 
Tom12
Posts: 1050
Joined: Tue Dec 27, 2005 7:29 am

RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 3:23 pm

I can relate to most things, but not the shopping thing. I can't go shopping with any woman! It drives me crazy.



Was a good read thought, and quite true.



Thanks for sharing.



Tom
"Per noctem volamus" - Royal Air Force Bomber Squadron IX
 
atct
Posts: 2472
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RE: For Those Of You With The "nice Guy" Syndrome

Mon Oct 22, 2007 11:42 pm

I consider myself one of thie Nice Guys...and im getting married in December.

Guess I didnt finish "last"

ATCT
Trikes are for kids!

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