Banco
Topic Author
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A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 3:30 pm

In one of his dafter moments, Prime Minister Gordon Brown suggested that Britain should have a national motto (despite managing perfectly well without one for centuries), presumably hoping that we'd get something like France's Liberte, Egalite, Fraternite, or the US's Land of the Free.

So the Times decided to open it out for suggestions on their website, and to the delight of all true Britons everywhere, barely anyone took it seriously.

Some of my favourites:

Yeah, but no, but, yeah.

Britain; Live wrong and prosper!

Did you spill my pint?

We live here so you don't have to.

In America We Trust

At least we're not French

Get Us Out Of Here

Once mighty empire, slightly used

Try writing history without us

Mathematically, we can still qualify.


http://timesonline.typepad.com/comment/2007/11/i-want-comment-.html

 rotfl 

So, since we clearly need help, let's throw it out to all our international enem....err friends. It's meant to be only five words, but I guess a little latitude is allowed. The more pithy the better. Abuse is allowed, but must be funny.  Wink
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
pilotdude09
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 3:34 pm

Lol one of the morning shows here in Aussie were taking the piss out of this the other day!

"Dull, Boring and Expensive" Was one of the good ones!  Wink

"Where?"


Then they got people to send in ones for Australia.

"Nick off we are full" was a goodie too.

Quoting Banco (Thread starter):
At least we're not French

 rotfl 
Qantas, Still calling Australia Home.........
 
JGPH1A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 3:49 pm

I posted mine...

"4 Provinces in search of a Country"

Quoting Banco (Thread starter):
Mathematically, we can still qualify

 rotfl 
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
KROC
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 3:54 pm

How about -

Dentistry - Don't buy into it!
 
cornish
Posts: 7651
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:00 pm

I saw this in the paper - marvellous Big grin

How about:

"Are you disrespectin my country ?"

"Please don't hold us responsible for Kirkie"

"Proud to be English"

"Land of the chicken tikka masala"
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
N1120A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:03 pm

"Oh, you mean there are cities other than London?"

"Anyone for cheese and pickle?"

"Even we don't like the native food."
Mangeons les French fries, mais surtout pratiquons avec fierte le French kiss
 
PlymSpotter
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:07 pm



Quoting Banco (Thread starter):
At least we're not French

 rotfl 

I love it - if we have to have a national motto, it had better be that one!


Dan Smile
...love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...
 
IFEMaster
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:11 pm



Quoting Banco (Thread starter):
Mathematically, we can still qualify.

 rotfl  The perpetual statement made every 2 years, right around this time of year. Fucking brilliant!

Some more options:

"Are we bovered?"

"Our chavs are pedigree and our ASBOs abundant."

"Two World Wars and One World Cup."
Delivering Anecdotes of Dubious Relevance Since 1978
 
Banco
Topic Author
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:12 pm



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 6):
I love it - if we have to have a national motto, it had better be that one!

It reminds me of the observation made by comedian Frankie Boyle, when told that the 2012 Olympics would make the country feel much better. He said "for £9 billion they could have written 'Fuck Off Germany' on the moon".  rotfl 
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
cornish
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:12 pm

Britain - Reassuringly Expensive


Britain - Home of the East European
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
Daleaholic
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:19 pm

I personally think it should be "You lookin at us?" Since that's all I seem to hear...
Religion is an illusion of childhood... Outgrown under proper education.
 
cornish
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:20 pm



Quoting Banco (Reply 8):
It reminds me of the observation made by comedian Frankie Boyle, when told that the 2012 Olympics would make the country feel much better. He said "for £9 billion they could have written 'Fuck Off Germany' on the moon".

for some reason that reminds me of when Brentford football club's sponsorship deal with KLM came to an end. Now Brentford FC have their stadium on the approach into LHR and it was suggested that a suitable slogan was painted on the roof of the main stand to replace the KLM logo. The most popular choice was "Flush over Fulham" Big grin
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
AirportSeven
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:59 pm

Strength
Through
Unity
Unity
Through
Faith.
 
EK20
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 5:36 pm

Quoting Pilotdude09 (Reply 1):
one of the morning shows here in Aussie were taking the piss out of this the other day!

Was it Sunrise? At least in the UK we don't have 10 minutes of adverts every 15 minutes.  

[Edited 2007-11-16 09:37:25]
 
Rara
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 5:54 pm



Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 7):

"Two World Wars and One World Cup."

2 wars 1 cup  mischievous 
Samson was a biblical tough guy, but his dad Samsonite was even more of a hard case.
 
yfbflyer
Posts: 255
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 7:21 pm

Your life on CCTV
1000 years in the making, 10 years to ruin
We apologise for the inconvenience
Drinking continues till morale improves
The land of Orwell welcomes you
We love not having constitutional rights. Shouldn't you?"
Americans who missed the boat
 rotfl 
Bleeding hearts, breeding tarts
Welcome to Monty Python's 1984
For training and security purposes
What's wrong with 7p tips?
No sex please, were British
I won't take my coat off, I'm not stopping
 rotfl 
Mother should I trust the government?
"Want to buy a peerage?"
I know! I've got bad teeth!
How high, Mr. President sir
Want oil, Start war, Blame Islam
dont do that, its bad for you
 rotfl 
Brazilian? Looks Arab. Open fire
 rotfl   rotfl   no   rotfl 
does anyone elsse understand irony
 rotfl 
Come experience '28 days later'
inbreed to succeed
A Great Airport,Though, Innit?
Friday is fatwah day
Why did we send the convicts to paradise?????
If it's Brown flush it down
 
srbmod
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:35 pm

They could always use the England Motto:
http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b358/srbmod/England.jpg
 duck 
 
JGPH1A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:45 pm



Quoting Yfbflyer (Reply 15):
We apologise for the inconvenience

Hehe !

Quoting Yfbflyer (Reply 15):
Friday is fatwah day

Only if you're very good and eat all your vegetables.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Fiatstilojtd
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:46 pm



Quoting Yfbflyer (Reply 15):
Friday is fatwah day

JGPH1A must have sent that in..... Wink
 
extspotter
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:46 pm

No wonder no-one likes them, they're millwall supporters. Chavs!

"Give me an ASBO or give me death!"

"Is one's face bovvard"

"Gingers prohibited"

"Tea? Cucumber Sandwich? Chicken Tikka Masala and a Stella?"

"Now in Polish!"
AF BE BY FR MV PD SZ U2 VZ DHC6, 8-3/4Q, 732/8, 763ER, A319, A380
 
PlymSpotter
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:52 pm



Quoting Banco (Reply 8):
It reminds me of the observation made by comedian Frankie Boyle, when told that the 2012 Olympics would make the country feel much better. He said "for £9 billion they could have written 'Fuck Off Germany' on the moon".

Oh that would have been good too, although 5-1 might fit a little better  Wink

Quoting EXTspotter (Reply 19):
"Gingers prohibited"

 scratchchin  Well, considering that;

Quoting Yfbflyer (Reply 15):
Friday is fatwah day

I declaireth a FATWAH on thee for that comment!  grumpy   Wink


Dan Smile
...love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...
 
JGPH1A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:09 pm



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 20):
I declaireth a FATWAH on thee for that comment!

Oh dear - don't start that again, you SCHISMATIC ! Report to your local inquisitioner for the usual beheading and 20 hours of community service.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
bristolflyer
Posts: 2103
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:12 pm

All of these are pretty funny, except...

Quoting Pilotdude09 (Reply 1):
"Dull, Boring and Expensive"

I guess that shows more about the Australian sense of humour than the British characteristics!

(C'mon, this post is 20 replies long, it's time to rag on another nation by now!)
Fortune favours the brave
 
PlymSpotter
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:34 pm



Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 21):
Report to your local inquisitioner for the usual beheading and 20 hours of community service.

I'm sorry, he emigrated months ago...

Quoting BristolFlyer (Reply 22):
(C'mon, this post is 20 replies long, it's time to rag on another nation by now!)

Oh alright then - will Scotland do, or shall it be Wales this time? We can always have a pop at the Irish later if you like?  silly 


Dan Smile
...love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...
 
bristolflyer
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:50 pm



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 23):
Scotland



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 23):
Wales



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 23):
Irish

Yes, yes and yes! Although 2 out of those 3 are already covered by the all the cooments above as they're part of Britain (but don't let that stop you!).
Fortune favours the brave
 
JGPH1A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:51 pm



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 23):
I'm sorry, he emigrated months ago...

Well then you'll have to behead yourself - let that be lesson to you !
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
extspotter
Posts: 617
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:59 pm

I am sorry, but we stinged on the gilloutine cord, he can't operate it himself when he is in it.

May I be of assistance?

"Foight! Foight! Foight!"
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JGPH1A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Fri Nov 16, 2007 11:31 pm



Quoting EXTspotter (Reply 26):
I am sorry, but we stinged on the gilloutine cord, he can't operate it himself when he is in it

May I be of assistance?

By all means, and make it quick. I have dozens of schismatics and heresiarchs to deal with. A zealot's work is never done.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
LAXspotter
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 12:23 am



Quoting Banco (Thread starter):
In America We Trust

The most substance  Big grin
"Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel" Samuel Johnson
 
User avatar
LTU932
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 12:36 am

I was thinking of this one:

Britain - Land of the posh, home of the chavs

 duck 
 
PlymSpotter
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 1:45 am



Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 27):
By all means, and make it quick. I have dozens of schismatics and heresiarchs to deal with. A zealot's work is never done.

Pah, I'll have you know I escaped the guillotine once before - those in my family are rather adapt at doing it you know. Eat cake, peasants!  snooty 
...love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...
 
jafa39
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 2:11 am

'Ooo you lookin' at?

Fancy a cuppa?

Spot the white man

or

"England, where its still 1984"
We, the undersigned, do hereby consent.....
 
NoUFO
Posts: 7397
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 4:30 am

"Britain - God save our gracious channel"

"Britain - a wee bit off from Europe"

"Britain - this is the mainland"

"You can keep our Pound"

[Edited 2007-11-16 20:41:14]
I support the right to arm bears
 
JGPH1A
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 8:48 am



Quoting PlymSpotter (Reply 30):
Eat cake, peasants!

I'd retort "A bas les aristos ! A la lanterne !" if I wasn't fully aware of your low and serflike social condition.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
skidmarks
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 9:10 am

Britain - Motorway = car park

Britain - What driving test?

Britain - If it's free, tax it!

Britain - Not my problem mate

Britain - Home of the PC brigade

Britain - now to be known as "Britainski"

And others which are far too offensive to mention in a sweet, lovable little thread like this. Big grin


Andy  old 
Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
 
Banco
Topic Author
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 12:47 pm

Ah, it does my heart good to see most of the world offer gently teasing putdowns, whilst the Brits really go for the throat and slag the place off as much as possible.

Makes you proud to be British, doesn't it? Big grin
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
gkirk
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 1:24 pm

From another site:
We came, we stayed, we sponged
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
JGPH1A
Posts: 15080
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 2:06 pm



Quoting Gkirk (Reply 36):
We came, we stayed, we sponged

Would that be the Scots, then ?  Smile
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Fiatstilojtd
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 5:26 pm



Quoting Jafa39 (Reply 31):
England, where its still 1984

Isn't it still 1973 there according to James Blunt  Wink
 
LHboyatDTW
Posts: 764
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 6:20 pm

England: Dentists five countries over

England: Why yes we envisioned the 2012 Olympic logo to look like the Simpson children having intercourse  duck 
The air in the clouds is very pure and fine, bracing and delicious because it's the same the angels breathe.
 
NoUFO
Posts: 7397
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2001 7:40 am

RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sat Nov 17, 2007 6:28 pm



Quoting Banco (Reply 35):
Ah, it does my heart good to see most of the world offer gently teasing putdowns, whilst the Brits really go for the throat and slag the place off as much as possible.

Makes you proud to be British, doesn't it?

"Britain - We are easy to please"
I support the right to arm bears
 
GDB
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RE: A New Motto For Britain!

Sun Nov 18, 2007 3:46 pm

No British Dream - Since We're Already Awake!


Been There, Done That, So Bollocks

Or we could modify that, by using and adapting the title of the best rock album ever created in Britain;
Never Mind The Bollocks - It's The UK!

I too roared at that Frankie Bolye joke, but being a bit serious for a minute, Brown clearly has forgotten that there is nothing more un-British, than having a formal, puffed up, head swelling, official national 'motto', at least in the Britain of living memory.
They are for schools and regiments.
I would shudder if they attempted to to invent one, they are for nations that sprung up fast, usually after a revolution.
All chippy and swaggering with it as a perhaps inevitable result.

And it would not work would it?
Anything picked would immediately be 'modified', distorted, satarised, these would sink into the national conciousness within days.
Everything else is after all.

A small example, most here will know that the UK RAF and Navy, are to buy the LM F-35B, Lockheed have named it the Lightening II .
For, so they say, both the WW2 US fighter and, given UK industries heavy involvement, the BAC Lightning fighter of the 1960's.
One UK military pilot, on a widely read pilot's forum, was of the opinion that this name was a bit poor, 'we might as well call it Dave' was his response.
Guess what? 'Dave' is being used more and more for the F-35, it might be by the middle of the next decade, once in service, that name might just have seeped right through the UK military aviation culture.

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