AR385
Topic Author
Posts: 6735
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2003 8:25 am

Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 6:13 am

So I was invited to this office party in the suburbs of Monterrey, which some of them are in the foothills of the Sierra Madre. We´ve read reports of Black Bears coming down to populated areas, but nobody had seen them. We were at my boss´s garden and I went to get some meat from the grill, and not more than 5 meters from me was Mama bear and four cubs, looking hungrily at the grill.

Then, she and the cubs stared at me.

Me, stayed as immobile as an ice sculpture, really hoping I would not shit my pants.

She growled but did not move.

I did not growled back and much less moved.

Then, she rose up on her feet and growled like a freaking dragon. It was too much for me, I turned around and ran back to the party. I figured if she reached me ( and I know she would have in 2 seconds ) at least the party crowd would come running at my screams. But alas, she did not chase me.

We all let her grab whatever she wanted, including the trash bags. She then left with her (very cute) cubs. I estimate her height when stood up at 1.85 meters. Weight was probably close to 200kg. Cubs looked tiny and skinny.

I got tomorrow´s day off and am curently at home guzzling a nice bottle of tequila hoping to get unconscious. Xanax is helping too.

Ironically, I don´t think I was ever scared. I felt as if I was outside my body. However, I never want to go through that again, unless I have a rifle.
 
AF1624
Posts: 497
Joined: Wed Jul 12, 2006 6:57 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 8:50 am

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):

Ahahahah excellent story man.

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):
I got tomorrow´s day off and am curently at home guzzling a nice bottle of tequila hoping to get unconscious. Xanax is helping too.

As good a remedy as any other in that situation really.

How did the others react ? Did you call some kind of animal control service or something ?
Cheers
 
AF1624
Posts: 497
Joined: Wed Jul 12, 2006 6:57 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 10:31 am

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):
I got tomorrow´s day off and am curently at home guzzling a nice bottle of tequila hoping to get unconscious. Xanax is helping too.

MWAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHHAHA this has become even funnier now that I've seen your "occupation" on your "profile". That is just absolutely epic man.
Cheers
 
Airstud
Posts: 3071
Joined: Wed Nov 29, 2000 11:57 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 10:44 am

You said she did not even chase you, but the thread title says they tried to make you their snack!!

I think the thread title is misleading!!   
Pancakes are delicious.
 
smittyone
Posts: 1336
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2012 12:55 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 11:35 am

Quoting AF1624 (Reply 2):
That is just absolutely epic man.

+1, best story I've read in a long time. Glad you escaped!

I read an account about about a guy who was attacked by a black bear...he was complaining that the usual advice about how you should "play dead" doesn't really work if the bear is already eating you!
 
WrenchBender
Posts: 1662
Joined: Wed Feb 04, 2004 5:59 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 2:19 pm

There is an issue here that needs to be dealt with, make sure a report goes to the California state department of fish and wildlife. They need to know that a Bear has lost its fear of humans, they should be able to catch and relocate momma to a less densely populated area. A bear acting as you described has become way to used to people and will eventually become a danger to herself, her cubs and any random people she meets.

WrenchBender
Silly Pilot, Tricks are for kids.......
 
mt99
Posts: 6166
Joined: Wed May 26, 1999 5:41 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 2:21 pm

I thought it was gay thing  
Step into my office, baby
 
Pyrex
Posts: 4044
Joined: Thu Aug 25, 2005 7:24 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 3:14 pm

Underestimating our own weight again, are we? I am sure you would have been more than just a snack, one proper meal at least.  
Read this very carefully, I shall write this only once!
 
AR385
Topic Author
Posts: 6735
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2003 8:25 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 5:04 pm

Quoting WrenchBender (Reply 5):
California state department of fish and wildlife.

It´s "Monterrey", Mexico, not "Monterey" Calirfornia. No one here to do all that. I agree, though, she has obviously lost her fear of humans, and funny story apart, she is a threat.

Quoting AF1624 (Reply 2):
that I've seen your "occupation" on your "profile".

Oh yeah that. Probably need to update my profile.

Quoting Pyrex (Reply 7):
Underestimating our own weight again, are we? I am sure you would have been more than just a snack, one proper meal at least.

Shhhhh. Anyway, I hope I would have given them a case of food poisoning so bad, that they forget about humans.

Quoting mt99 (Reply 6):
I thought it was gay thing

Maybe, but knowing my boss, this definitely was not the kind of party where you expect to find those type of bears and/or cubs. You need to go to a club for that.

Quoting AF1624 (Reply 1):
How did the others react ? Did you call some kind of animal control service or something ?

The others were surprised, however, the homeowner told us that this time of year, it´s not uncommon for them to get down to these suburbs. I had heard that too. They are looking for food, as their cubs have been born in the spring and Momma bear is looking for stuff to feed them and herself, I suppose. So he was not that surprised. A lot tried to creep to the grill to get pics and such. I hope I can post some here later in the week.

[Edited 2012-07-11 10:08:53]
 
User avatar
ER757
Posts: 2426
Joined: Tue May 10, 2005 10:16 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:46 pm

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):
It was too much for me, I turned around and ran back to the party.

Actually the very thing you are NOT supposed to do. Although I know it's much more easily said than done, you should slowly back away - facing the bear but not looking it in the eye. It all sounds good in theory but I am sure it's a different scenario when you're actually in an encounter. My bear experiences have all been pretty benign. Never came across a mama with cubs (thank goodness). Mostly I've just seen them at a distance of 50 - 100 meters as they were browsing in meadows. That's good enough for me. Close enough to shoot some photos, far enough away to avoid a conflict. Glad every worked out OK for you.
 
AR385
Topic Author
Posts: 6735
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2003 8:25 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 8:53 pm

Quoting ER757 (Reply 9):
Actually the very thing you are NOT supposed to do. Although I know it's much more easily said than done, you should slowly back away - facing the bear but not looking it in the eye.

I understand what you are saying and I know what I did is not what´s recommended by all the experts out there. But I took a calculated risk. The other guests which were about 25 (life insurance salesmen, ironically) were no farther than 10 meters away. I figured if Mama caught me, the other 25 would help and she would backtrack. If I had been alone in the woods, sure, I would have done excatly what you suggest.
 
Pyrex
Posts: 4044
Joined: Thu Aug 25, 2005 7:24 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Wed Jul 11, 2012 11:58 pm

Quoting AR385 (Reply 10):
The other guests which were about 25 (life insurance salesmen, ironically)

Ah, that explains why nobody did anything - they probably thought it was part of the entertainment. I heard those life insurance salesman events can get pretty wild...  
Read this very carefully, I shall write this only once!
 
ltbewr
Posts: 12361
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2004 1:24 pm

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:14 am

I know of someone who lives in Northern New Jersey who has been too close to bears several times around hers and neighbors homes. So far, she hasn't panicked or done some dumb move to cause her to be attacked.
 
RussianJet
Posts: 5982
Joined: Sat Jul 21, 2007 4:15 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:20 am

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):
But alas, she did not chase me.

Sorry, I had to laugh when I read that. 'Alas' here means that you are totally sorry the bear did not chase you! I guess from context you are in fact pretty glad she chose not to.

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):
guzzling a nice bottle of tequila hoping to get unconscious. Xanax is helping too.

Dude, benzodiazepines and tequila are not a good mix! Watch you don't get too unconscious there!
✈ Every strike of the hammer is a blow against the enemy. ✈
 
vikkyvik
Posts: 11761
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2003 1:58 pm

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Thu Jul 12, 2012 3:01 am

Quoting AR385 (Thread starter):
She growled but did not move.

I did not growled back and much less moved.

I laughed out loud at that!

Quoting mt99 (Reply 6):
I thought it was gay thing

Reading the thread title, I thought it was a Chicago thing!
I'm watching Jeopardy. The category is worst Madonna songs. "This one from 1987 is terrible".
 
TSS
Posts: 2479
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 3:52 pm

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Thu Jul 12, 2012 4:23 am

Quoting vikkyvik (Reply 14):
Quoting mt99 (Reply 6):
I thought it was gay thing

Reading the thread title, I thought it was a Chicago thing!

Don't doubt for a second that there are some hungry (and tasty) "bears" be found in Chicago, but this thread is about an encounter with an actual mammal of the ursine variety. However, if memory serves correctly, our AR385 is not the least bit interested in "bears", so his overall reaction probably would have been much the same if he had been approached by a "bear" and four "cubs" as it was when he encountered a literal bear and four cubs.  

Now that my lame attempt at humor has been duly posted, I must say that I expect a bear with four cubs would be desperately hungry since two cubs is the normal litter size, and mama bear is having to work double time to keep her cubs and herself fed. No wonder the cubs looked skinny.
Able to kill active threads stone dead with a single post!
 
vikkyvik
Posts: 11761
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2003 1:58 pm

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Thu Jul 12, 2012 4:56 am

Quoting TSS (Reply 15):

Don't doubt for a second that there are some hungry (and tasty) "bears" be found in Chicago,

Regarding my post:

Not gay people, but sports teams:

Chicago Bears
Chicago Cubs
I'm watching Jeopardy. The category is worst Madonna songs. "This one from 1987 is terrible".
 
AR385
Topic Author
Posts: 6735
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2003 8:25 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Fri Jul 13, 2012 3:16 am

Quoting RussianJet (Reply 13):
Sorry, I had to laugh when I read that. 'Alas' here means that you are totally sorry the bear did not chase you! I guess from context you are in fact pretty glad she chose not to.

thanks for teaching me the correct context of that expression. I used it as automatically as I´ve read several times. English is not my native language.

Quoting vikkyvik (Reply 14):
I laughed out loud at that!

Glad you did. I was trying hard not to dirty my underwear.

Quoting TSS (Reply 15):
Don't doubt for a second that there are some hungry (and tasty) "bears" be found in Chicago, but this thread is about an encounter with an actual mammal of the ursine variety. However, if memory serves correctly, our AR385 is not the least bit interested in "bears",

Actually I´m into twinks. But I do not mind the occassional bear. I am one myself.
 
User avatar
DocLightning
Posts: 19606
Joined: Wed Nov 16, 2005 8:51 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Fri Jul 13, 2012 3:33 am

Quoting WrenchBender (Reply 5):
There is an issue here that needs to be dealt with, make sure a report goes to the California state department of fish and wildlife. They need to know that a Bear has lost its fear of humans, they should be able to catch and relocate momma to a less densely populated area. A bear acting as you described has become way to used to people and will eventually become a danger to herself, her cubs and any random people she meets.

Very good point. Thanks for bringing that up.

I'm told that if confronted by a bear, stand up, make your self big, wave your arms, and yell at it to go away.
http://jeffreytrust.wordpress.com/2010/01/03/scaring-a-bear-away/

I'm not sure if this will work with a she-bear with cubs, though.

Quoting mt99 (Reply 6):

I thought it was gay thing
Quoting vikkyvik (Reply 14):
Reading the thread title, I thought it was a Chicago thing!

       Two very valid and very disparate associations, I must say! Hilarious!

Quoting RussianJet (Reply 13):
Dude, benzodiazepines and tequila are not a good mix! Watch you don't get too unconscious there!

He just survived a she-bear with cubs, dude. I think that's his goal. But seriously, be careful with this mix. Take too much of either and you could very well stop breathing. Would suck to survive a she-bear without a scratch and then die of EtOH/Benzodiazepine poising.
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
User avatar
DocLightning
Posts: 19606
Joined: Wed Nov 16, 2005 8:51 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Fri Jul 13, 2012 3:35 am

Also, a very cool, and tangentially on-topic video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVMBdi4dgME
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
vikkyvik
Posts: 11761
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2003 1:58 pm

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Fri Jul 13, 2012 5:03 am

Be glad it wasn't a grizzly (don't remember where I first saw this):

http://www.vksphoto.com/photos/i-K4rskzG/0/XL/i-K4rskzG-XL.jpg
I'm watching Jeopardy. The category is worst Madonna songs. "This one from 1987 is terrible".
 
AR385
Topic Author
Posts: 6735
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2003 8:25 am

RE: Tonight Bear And Cubs Tried To Have A Snack Of Me

Sun Jul 15, 2012 8:24 am

Quoting RussianJet (Reply 13):
Dude, benzodiazepines and tequila are not a good mix! Watch you don't get too unconscious there!
Quoting DocLightning (Reply 18):
But seriously, be careful with this mix. Take too much of either and you could very well stop breathing. Would suck to survive a she-bear without a scratch and then die of EtOH/Benzodiazepine poising.

I ought to have added the disclaimer "do not try this at home". I know the risks of mixing alcohol and benzodiazepines. I was being facetitous in that part of my writing. I do know, due to my previous occupation that appears as current in my profile about many medications. Anti-sychotics, Anti-depresants, anxiety medications and benzos. I know the dosages at which they become dangerous when mixed with alcohol.

That said, when the adrenaline rush disappeared I was at home and very scared, and anxious. I never thought I was in danger of dying, but it all sort of hit all of a sudden. So I took a couple of Xanax and a couple shots of Tequila. Nothing dangerous. I do realize the dangers of ingesting a whole bottle of 80 proof liquor and more tahn 20 benzo pills. But that was not the case. I am sorry If anyone got the wrong idea. And please, do not try it.

It was and still is, one of the scariest experiences of my life, funny story aside.

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: agill, einsteinboricua, Kiwirob, scbriml and 29 guests