noelg
Posts: 2313
Joined: Fri Apr 26, 2002 11:39 pm

The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 5:41 pm

Just sitting here looking forward to my next trip to the USA in November, remembered about the last time I was there a couple of years ago, and after flying MCO-ATL on an Airtran 717 the pilot announced:

"Welcome to Atlanta, I hope you enjoyed your flight, the next time you decide to go shooting through the sky in a metal tube, I hope you'll think of us here at AirTran".

I wondered if anyone has heard anything like this on their travels, I know there are emails flying around with the list of funny comments, has anyone heard anything funnier themselves?
 
swissgabe
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 6:38 pm

Sabena flight from BRU to WAW:

here we go ... and then he gave full power and we took off ...
Smooth as silk - Royal Orchid Service /// Suid-Afrikaanse Lugdiens - Springbok
 
La Carlota
Posts: 336
Joined: Fri Jun 01, 2001 9:17 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 6:40 pm

-- 1977, VA flight CCS-MIA. The landing of the DC-10 was superb, just perfect. All the passengers began to applaud, as it used to be a tradition among Venezuelan passengers, but this time it was really well deserved. The captain thanked that very politely, but made a remark: "Thank-you very much for your appreciation, but I would like to remind you to remain seated until we reach the gate".


-- Two years ago, on a BA LHR-BCN flight, after landing, the weather was awful in Barcelona (lots of heavy rain, drizzle, stormy... even though it was the month of August), and it was sunny in London when we left about two hours before. The flight was full of British vacationers to Spain. The captain just said: "It's a pleasure for me to welcome you to Barcelona... and sorry for the weather!"


Tango Tango Fox
 
LPL
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 7:13 pm

BA LHR - LAX:

"We're flying over Greenland at 38,000ft, so if you're sitting by a window, look out for those penguins!"

Wrong pole captain!
 
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ERJ135
Posts: 672
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 8:03 pm

American Airlines 757, St Louis to Los Angeles,
After the welcome aboard the pilot said
"I do hope Los Angeles is in your travel plans today because if it wasn't it is now!"
I remember when the DC-3 was new!
 
Rotate
Posts: 1448
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2003 5:52 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 8:43 pm

just yesterday:

I was flying from LHR to ZRH, the captain introduced hidelf and the cabin and then said: "The flying time in this A319 to ZRH will take 1:30min .... "

actually we have been on a A320  Smile/happy/getting dizzy

cheers robin
ABC
 
sushka
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 9:21 pm

My last flight on a DL 763, (flt 290 I think) the capt came on the intercom two different times and said "Delta two..." and then realized what he did.  Smile/happy/getting dizzy
Pershoyu Spravoyu Litaki!
 
godbless
Posts: 2680
Joined: Tue Apr 04, 2000 5:26 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 9:34 pm

Robin,
I just got home from my flight from IST to CGN and there they also announced the A320 to be an A319.
But I guess the crews do not really care if the bird they are gonna fly is an A319 or A320, if they would only love them birds as we freaks do...

Max
 
clrd2go
Posts: 976
Joined: Sat Mar 01, 2003 4:43 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:02 pm


on a CO 727 about to leave DEN (Stapleton) for COS "flight attendants take
your seats..and let's get out of town."

I've also noticed a few instances of the pilot/FO not realizing he was on
intercom and responding to ATC.


Jim
What a long strange trip it's been
 
fritzi
Posts: 2598
Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2001 2:34 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:16 pm

On a LX flight from ZRH - VIE:

the captain said:

Our flying time to London Heathrow will be two hours and twenty minutes.  Nuts.

I was starting to think that they had entered the wrong flightplan into the FMC but then he corrected his mistake a minute later.


 
Rick767
Posts: 2613
Joined: Sun Jan 30, 2000 8:11 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:19 pm

One of my own personal blunders:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Malaga..."

...as we vacated the runway in Almeira!  Nuts
I used to love the smell of Jet-A in the morning...
 
goingboeing
Posts: 4727
Joined: Sat Dec 04, 1999 1:58 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:28 pm

On Southwest, arriving in MCI the pilot said that if you enjoyed your flight, thank you for flying Southwest. If you didn't...then this was TWA flight 105.
 
luv2fly
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:34 pm

I once was traveling on business with a fellow co-worker who was traveling on vacation with her three young daughters. It happened we were together on both out bound and return flights, well the youngest did not care for the flight out, tho on the return they were all experienced travelers and the littlest one was just over 2 years old, looks at Mom and says very loudly, "When are we going to blast off!" Whole plane laughed for minutes. Out of the mouth of babes.
You can cut the irony with a knife
 
VS601
Posts: 33
Joined: Tue May 20, 2003 8:01 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:34 pm

During a cabin crew safety demo on CO flight from Houston to SFO once , they said: In the unlikely event we should land on water, your seat cushion doubles up as a flotation device. Should you reach land, you may keep these courtesy of Continental........Hilarious!
 
ctflyer
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:38 pm

I was flying on United from Chicago to Hartford. The pilot was on the PA making an announcement in reference to the fact that we had begun our decent and he mention another city. He was unable to remember where we were flying and in an attempt to correct himself mentioned another city which was also incorrect. He finally asked the first officer what city we were flying into.

I found it very amusing but I'm sure that those apprehensive flyers did not share in my amusement.
 
TR
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Joined: Thu May 03, 2001 1:28 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:44 pm

Some years back on board a Cathay 747-400. Shortly before the famous Kowloon approach into Kai Tak our captain announced: ".... and for those of you who is flying into Hong Kong for the first time, simple sit back and enjoy the ride!"

Those were the days:

View Large View Medium
Click here for bigger photo!

Photo © Gerhard Plomitzer

 
Guest

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 10:53 pm

On a Tyrolean Airways flight in the late afternoon from CDG to INN -- My seat was 7A in the Dash8-300 and I was watching out the window when to first officer announced that We're now flying over Zurich Airport and so we've reached Austrian terretory!!! ... Well, it would be nice if ZRH is in Austria...  Big thumbs up

regards, Florian
 
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EA CO AS
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 11:11 pm

On a recent Alaska Airlines flight from Phoenix, AZ to Portland, OR:

Ladies and gentlemen, we'd like to welcome you aboard Alaska flight 717 going to....Los Cabos...

And a cheer went up from the passengers.

...ok, how 'bout Puerto Vallarta?

Another cheer.

Mazatlan? Or Cancun?

Another big cheer.

What about Anchorage?

The whole plane booed loudly.

Ok, fine. I'll take you to Portland, jeez.

Everyone laughs

We'll be leaving the gate shortly. We ask that you pay close attention to your cabin crew, who will be performing a safety demonstration for you momentarily. For your information, your first officer and I have a combined 42 years' flying experience, 22 of those in Alaska Airlines MD-80s.

Your cabin crew has a combined 1,912 years of experience, however.


Pause

Ok, so now that the flight attendants are glaring at me and threatening my life, let's get underway. Welcome aboard.

Everyone continued laughing, and then the preflight safety demo began as the senior flight attendant said over the P.A. Ok, how do I compete with THAT?
"In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem - government IS the problem." - Ronald Reagan

Comments made here are my own and are not intended to represent the official position of Alaska Air Group
 
beefer
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 11:24 pm

I've always wondered if the pilots can actually hear the clapping of the passengers when a good landing is made. I guess I've always thought that they wouldn't be able to hear it through the cockpit walls.

Any comments????
 
MIA777
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 11:29 pm

Do pilots really not know what sort of aircraft they are operating (A319/320)??? Is it really that much similar only the 320 is simply longer? I guess I would be concerned if I knew I was on a 320 and my pilot thought otherwise...
MIA777
 
J32driver
Posts: 385
Joined: Fri May 05, 2000 2:55 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 11:47 pm

Probably no clue about the 319 vs. the 320. At one time I was flying 3 different models of the same airplane... all different lengths and passenger configurations. The only way to tell the difference was to look at the pack of speed cards on the center console and read the series you were in. Other than that, the cockpits were 100% identical.
 
propatriamori
Posts: 131
Joined: Wed Jun 07, 2000 6:42 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Tue Jun 17, 2003 11:48 pm

Actually heard on a CO flight, 10/01...

Plane was about 40% full.

"Ladies and Gentleman, as we have a few empty seats on this flight, please fell free to move to any available window seat, we'd like our competitors to think this plane is full..."
 
flyCMH
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RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 1:51 am

The funniest thing I ever heard a pilot say actually occured while I was at work. I was in the push-tug pushing back a Phoenix-bound A320 when the pilot asked me:

"Hey, do you know what separates pilots from the scum of the earth?"

Chucking, I asked "what"?

His response: "The cockpit door!"

 Smile/happy/getting dizzy
 
dan2002
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Joined: Tue Dec 17, 2002 7:11 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:05 am

On a WN flight awhile back the CO-Pilot came on the PA and said: " Today we have someone celebrating their 90th Birthday today and its his first time flying so lets all give a round of applause to the pilot!!" The whole plane went silent.
A guy asks 'What's Punk?'. I kick over a trash can and its punk. He knocks over a trash can and its trendy.
 
Qb001
Posts: 1923
Joined: Fri Apr 28, 2000 12:42 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:08 am

CO 733 PBI-EWR.

"Ladies and gentleman, welcome to the wonderful Renaissance city of Newark" (big laughs in the plane) and then "Since this flight landed a bit in advance, please remember next time one of our flight is delayed that you owe us 30 minutes" !!!
Never let the facts get in the way of a good theory.
 
blink182
Posts: 5278
Joined: Mon Oct 18, 1999 3:09 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:33 am

Flying out of DEN several years ago on Christmas day, the FA did the safety demo in the tune of 'Twas the Night Before Christmas. She did a good job too!

Flying to I forgot where fairly recently, some people were late to board due to incoming flights that were delayed, and in this real mother-like voice, the purser says "Kiiids" that got a few laughs.

Upon gate arrival at ORD from LHR, the FA was making an announcement about Mad-Cow disease and one of the cockpit crew members interrupts her and in this very enthusaistic voice excitedly says, "Ladies and Gentlemen, weeelcome to Chicago!"

blink
Give me a break, I created this username when I was a kid...
 
flyingbronco05
Posts: 3484
Joined: Fri May 10, 2002 11:43 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:35 am

AA flight from ORD-STL

The Captain came on and said:

"Im captain XXX and the co-pilot is XXX and we are going to remain fully clothed for this entire flight, unlike southwest."

I was cracking up, and so was my mom.
Never Trust Your Fuel Gauge
 
JBLUA320
Posts: 2997
Joined: Mon May 27, 2002 8:51 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:36 am

Hmmmmmm
Ive had a few funny incidents:

Northwest 757-200 8/18/02
As boarding was underway, every now and again a male FA would get on the horn and announce "This is flight 861 with non-stop service to Fairbanks from the Twin Cities. If Fairbanks is not your final destination, please see a flight attendant immediately."

After 2L was closed, we began push back and he came on again and said "Folks, this is flight 861 with 757 jet service to Fairbanks. If Fairbanks is not your final destination... *pause* ...it is now."
--------
jetBlue A320
"Well guys, good afternoon from the pointy part of the plane..>"

Shortly before take off:
"Here we go- Yeeehaw!"
(The flight attendants gave each other strange looks after that one)
---------
Continental Express ERJ-145XR April/03

"Ladies and geltemen, this is the pilot speaking. On behalf of your entire Continental Express crew,which totals the number of 3, we'd like to be the first to welcome you to Pittsburgh. On your way out the door, please be sure to congradulate our first officer on that spectacular landing. Ive now been put to shame.."
The landing really was incredible...
--------

Thats it for me..
JBLU
 
BDRules
Posts: 1474
Joined: Fri Oct 27, 2000 6:31 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 3:43 am

When i was on an Airtours International flight from SYD back to MAN we were cutting our slot time and the night time closure of the airport very fine when the pilot came on to the speaker and said:
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard this flight this evening to Singapore and onwards to Manchester. Please take your seats as quickly as possable as we are very close to missing our slot, so please sit back and prepare yourself for BLAST OFF"

And i mean it was a blast off but it did make everyone laugh

Regards

BDRules
 
eg777er
Posts: 1782
Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2000 11:11 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 4:40 am

I've always been a fan of:

"Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls....."
 
jmc757
Posts: 1205
Joined: Thu Mar 09, 2000 3:36 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 4:54 am

Flying back from TFS to BHX in 2001 with Airtours, the ground agents were having a few problems getting the *new* airbridge connected to our A320. Cabin crew.....
"ladies and gentleman we apologise for the delay in deplaning. This is because the nice people at Birmingham International have assigned us to one of the brand new airbridges they have, so obviously its really great and efficient....."

got a few laughs from everyone!
jmc757
 
Guest

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 5:03 am

On B6 flight from ROC-JFK landing at JFK

"Whoa big fella, WHOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAA!


On a B6 flight SLC-JFK

"...... our time of arrival into JFK will be 610 am where the forecast for that time will be dark. It will be continued dark until widespread sunlight appears around 730am. Remember no one loves you or your wallet more than JetBlue Airways!"
 
flyboy36y
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Joined: Sun Mar 19, 2000 1:45 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 5:40 am

TWA 767 JFK-BOS

Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to TWA flight 473 with nonstop service to Bostn Logan international airport... if boston is..uh.. not where you are going... you´re on the wrong plane. I guess I should have told you that before we pushed back...

AA 757 JFK-CUN
ON THE TAXIWAY HOLDING SHORT

"Folks, we´re number 2 for takoff (SOUND OF A TRAIN WHISTLE "CHOOO!! CHOOO!!") Well looks like this train is ready to roll out the station...hang on!"

 
dc-10 levo
Posts: 3376
Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2001 3:22 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 6:02 am

Me: So how can I get into Piloting?

Pilot: You'll need a rich sugar daddy cos it'll cost you £60,000 just for training!

Me: Oh.

DC-10
 
Andie007
Posts: 827
Joined: Thu Jun 08, 2000 5:15 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 6:11 am

Lufthansa flight from Munich to Dusseldorf.

Captian: " We're on an inner-german flight. So forget the English translation. Today I'll do nothing. Perhaps, I'll ask for the actual weather at DUS. My co-pilot will do the rest. So fasten your seltbelt."  Smile/happy/getting dizzy
 
danialanwar
Posts: 420
Joined: Fri Mar 16, 2001 6:13 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 6:24 am

Early this year on a Swiss flight from Basel to Sevilla:

- pilot announcement in Spanish
- then French
- then English
- then German: (translated) "My German is not very good so I hope you understood one of the other languages"
Best Business Class: Royal Brunei. Best Economy: Singapore Airlines. First: please send money first!
 
JBirdAV8r
Posts: 3454
Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2001 4:44 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 7:32 am

A recent NW flight JAX-DTW, after sterile cockpit chime climbing through 10,000':

"Well, ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard! Looks like we have a spectacular flight ahead. It's a beautiful day in Tennessee, and the weather in Memphis is looking great. We may be arriving a few minutes ahead of schedule today! We should be landing at Memphis out of the north..east....(pause)...hmm....*click*

*30 second pause*

"Ahh, so it appears we'll be going to Detroit today..."
I got my head checked--by a jumbo jet
 
kramri
Posts: 72
Joined: Sun Mar 30, 2003 2:19 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:08 pm

We were settling down prior to push on Morris Air (DEN, SLC, LAX), when we heard a wooden train whistle and "All aboard!"

P.S. the captain was wearing an engineers cap.

 
jcs17
Posts: 7376
Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2001 11:13 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 2:56 pm

On a full CO Express ERJ-145 from DAL-IAH we stopped short before turning onto the main runway for departure, the captain came on the P.A. and said, "Seems were having a bit of a problem with our weight here, and I'm not talking about our co-pilot for a change."
America's chickens are coming home to rooooost!
 
senliture
Posts: 404
Joined: Sun May 14, 2000 5:28 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Wed Jun 18, 2003 8:47 pm

Eg777er,

you should take VirginBlue, all of their announcements are with "boys and girls"!

Senliture
 
hammer
Posts: 638
Joined: Wed Jul 11, 2001 9:02 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 4:11 am

On a flight from DTW-MSP a few years back the captain came on shortly after takeoff and said "Ladies and Gentlemen, we are turning back to the Detroit area" ( a pause in his speech) "we forgot the Columbian Coffee"...the entire flight he kept saying very funny things and when we landed in MSP, the plane erupted in clapping and laughter...
 
VgnAtl747
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Joined: Fri Apr 06, 2001 3:59 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 4:41 am

Virgin Atlantic flight from LHR to JFK several years ago, as we taxied toward the gate:

"Ladies and gentlemen, on behalf of Virgin Atlantic, we'd like to thank you for flying with us today. Just a reminder that we ask that you remain seated until the aircraft has come to a complete stop and the engines have been shut off. If anyone would like to stay after and clean the aircraft, go ahead and stand up before the seatbelt signs are switched off."
Work Hard. Fly Right. Continental Airlines
 
Likesplanes
Posts: 103
Joined: Sat Jun 23, 2001 3:58 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 5:13 am

Actually not a pilot, but a flight attendant on a Westjet flight; arriving in Grande Prairie AB from Edmonton AB. Just after touchdown in Grande Prairie, one of the flight attendants came over the intercom to announce our arrival in Grande Prairie, and to "Thank us for flying with Westjet on our modern and efficient 737-200 airplane". (Some of you will start chuckling at this point). She then went on to say "You might be interested to know, ladies and gentlemen, that it takes a grade 12 education to be able to fly one of these aircraft". She then went on with a big grin to say "I guess that's why we have TWO pilots on this plane".
 
fsuwxman
Posts: 435
Joined: Wed Jan 02, 2002 3:57 pm

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 5:37 am

Taxing for take off 9L FLL to TLH on Comair CRJ...

Ladies and gentleman... looks like we will be number one, (long pause) or number four for take off...

Gave me a little chuckle...
ASOS... Another Shi#y Observation Station
 
Guest

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 5:56 am

Flying on a Singapore Airlines B747-400 SIN-AKL a couple of years back, the Capt came on the air and made his pre-departure anouncement:

"Hello Ladies and Gentlemen. I'd like to welcome you aboard this Singapore Airlines flight to Auckland, New Zealand. If you're not going to Auckland, then you must be on the wrong aircraft, otherwise I am...!"

 Smile
 
EGPX
Posts: 104
Joined: Sat Aug 17, 2002 3:57 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 6:01 am

Another FA announcement rather than the pilot but here goes:

Ryanair 737 on the ground at STN prior to push back for PIK. FA gives safety briefing and adds: "I'd like to remind passengers that all Ryanair flights are strictly non-smoking and anyone found breaking this rule will be made to take a seat outside the aircraft where the inflight movie is Gone With the Wind".
 
flyf15
Posts: 6633
Joined: Tue May 18, 1999 11:10 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 6:17 am

Checking in with Toronto center last week:

"Howdy Toronto Center, ***** with you at one-one thousand, how ya'll der'n?"

The pilot being...well....me. Big grin
 
mbmbos
Posts: 2568
Joined: Sat May 27, 2000 4:16 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 7:01 am

United Airlines 757 Co-pilot on an LAX-BOS nonstop. We had taken an extremely southerly route, south of Tucson and past El Paso. I began wondering where we were because I hadn't seen the Rocky Mountains (hard to miss on a transcon flight). Apparently another passenger had expressed the same concern:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, one of our passengers has asked about our present location...so, if anybody knows, please come up to the flight deck right away."
 
rongotai
Posts: 350
Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2000 11:59 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 7:46 am

Recently reported in 'Australian Aviation'

CAPTAIN of QF3: Good morning, this is Qantas5.

SYDNEY TOWER ATC: Good morning. Either you're Qantas 3 or I'm in Melbourne.
 
rongotai
Posts: 350
Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2000 11:59 am

RE: The Funniest Thing A Pilot Has Ever Said

Thu Jun 19, 2003 7:50 am

This is my all time favourite.

DENVER TOWER: United 123. there is a disabled aircraft blocking the taxiway to your right. Bear left.

United 123 comes to a halt and does not move for about a minute.

DENVER TOWER. United 123, is there a problem?

UNITED 123. I can see the disabled aircraft, but I can't see the bear.

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