This was on Letterman's a while ago....love number 2 btw
Top Ten Signs You Have A Bad Travel Agent
10. Gets you cheap airfare then asks, "You know how to fly a 737, right?"
9. For best rate, you have to agree to a Saturday night stay with him
8. The itinerary shows you crossing the Pacific Ocean on Amtrak
7. Reserves you a great package for seven days and two nights
6. Laughs crazily when you say you're on a five-week working vacation
5. Books you on something called "Dulta Airlines"
4. Looks at you funny after hearing there's a "South" America
3. "Rental car" turns out to be a donkey with cupholders
2. No matter what your destination, you have a layover in Afghanistan
1. You say you want to see the world--she hands you two tickets to "Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo"