OOPS, I did it(her) again…
My trip report starts in Silver Spring, MD. Friday afternoon my Polish friend called me and asked for a favor.
-“Hey man, I have half a gallon of Smirnof, put your butt in your car and come over”
I said to myself “What the heck, what are friends for, I have to help him out”
I drove to his place and shortly after 9pm we started with that bottle.
Around 11pm when I was already more than tipsy, fat chick came to his apartment (you know which fat chick I’m talking about hehe, I did her on New Years Eve). So she joined our small group
We were talking about our friends in Poland, about old good time we had in High School and crap like that.
Around midnight, my cell phone rang. Guess who it was? It was that chick from South Carolina
Yeap, she called, telling me how much she miss me. You know, I was drunk so I told her, don’t worry baby, did I told you that I made reservation for a car and I’m coming over tomorrow?
She said “yeah right, you are coming to SC like last time”. I said I’m telling you baby, I love you and I cant wait no more, I have to see you”. So we were talking for about 10 more minutes and I went back to my Polish-Russian Vodka Community (PRVC)
And I was thinking, “Why the hell I lied to her again”? Hehehe
My friend overheard me on the phone and said: “You didn’t tell me that you are going to South Carolina tomorrow” I said to him “ I didn’t know myself that I’m going hehehehe”
So immediately I went to www.budget.com and I started searching for some nice car. My first thought was Chrysler Concorde but it burns lots of gas, my next idea was to rent some 4x4 car.
That was an excellent idea! I made reservation for Dodge Durango Big car, roomy car, comfy, all I needed was lots of space on the back seat
Well, after that I went back to my PRVC. Around 4am I said goodnight to all participants and I passed out on the bed that my friend has prepared for me earlier. Not long after that fat chick laid down beside my small sensitive body
I was pretending that I’m sleeping but for real I was thinking “Do it or not? Do it or not???” I forgot to mention that my dick was thinking not my brain
Guess what was next?? Yeap, I was playing with her huge boobs! When my fingers were somewhere (Cant mention that word in here) I thought that she’s so ready for me (she was wet in that place). I started everybody knows what hehehe 6am I finished and I went to bathroom to wash myself. What I saw there was horrible!!! My both hands were in blood, Mr.Dicky was covered with blood too!!! That was most disgusting thing I ever saw!!! Instead washing my hands and Mr.D I took shower right there on the spot!!!!!! (God damn it was so gross!!!!!!!! ) After I came from the shower I took my cell phone, and I left. It was around 6am when I left my friend house. I saw that my $80 white sweater was covered with blood
When I got to my home it was almost 7am. I was still kind of drunk and tired. I set my alarm clock to 10am took shower again and I went to sleep.
I didn’t got up till 11, so I had only 1hr to get ready and get the car. Sharp noon I got to the rental place, they told me that they don’t have Durango for me but I can get Ford Expedition. But after some time they found one for me
I left the rental place and I went back home to take shower again (I couldn’t get that fat chick out of my mind), finally I left home for SC around 1:30pm. Weather was pretty good; road was dry so I had smooth ride. My first pit stop was in Durham NC. I stop at some gas station where I filled up my tank. Also I had to get some condoms. When I was paying for gas and rubber, girl behind the counter asked me: “Where are you from? You have cute accent and you are cute too “ hehehe Her mother was beside her (I thought it was her mother cause they look alike), and she asked me again “So where are you from?” I said “From Poland” and the mother said to doughter “ I told you that his from Russia” hehehe What a stupid women!
Beside, that young girl had fewer teeth then her mother hehehehe and alllllll yellow! Hehehehe
Let me go on with the story. From Durham I had 250 more miles to go. Exactly 4 more hrs to drive. I was so excited to meet that girl I was making a plans what we will do, where we will go etc. When I was close to her town I called her and asked for directions from the interstate. Finally when I get to her place she was waiting for me on the parking lot. It was already 9pm. She approached my car and we start kissing
I told her to jump in so we can go eat something. But she said that she wants me to meet her parents! Hehehe Damn, that was very tough for me But I went to her apartment, I met her parents, we were chatting little bit, she has cool parents. After 20 minutes we left. She said that she wants me to meet her sister hehehe I went with her to her sister house. She has cool and pretty sister. Her husband came with beer and some wine, they were planing little party hehehe but I didn’t wanna stay there I told her sister that we will go eat something and then we’ll come back. She said that she could make me some dinner if I’m really hungry. Man, I was doing my best to leave the house hehehe but after 40 minutes finally we left. The only open place for dinner was Apple Bees or whatever you call that place hehehe so we went there. I parked my car in front of that place. I start kissing my Miss Universe. When after 10 minutes I was trying to change CD I saw that almost entire Apple Bees was looking at us hehehe they didn’t eat, they were staring at us hehehe so I had to move my car to other spot where nobody will bother us. When I moved from that spot and parked behind the building I started playing with her booby’s hehehe Suddenly someone knocked on the window. It was bunch of 17-19 years old guys’ hehehe they were laughing and one of them said “Man! You have gorgeous girl!” hehehe I was damn embarrassed, so we moved to the other parking lot hehehe When we were there we moved to hot action. Now I’m not gonna say what we were doing there hehehe but it was very nice
I couldn’t concentrate on her cause cars were passing by and my car was shaking like something was going on inside hehehe
I’ve asked her if she knows some quiet place where we can go. She didn’t know any so I came with brilliant idea that we can go close to her sister house that was the place on the edge of some forest. So we went there. There was some construction going on and I found nice spot hehehe
NO DETAILS FOR THIS PART hehehe
Around 2am I took her back home. Her mother got up and she said that in living room she prepared bed for me so I can crush right there. Hehehe that was crazy. I told her that I really appreciate her efforts but I have to go back to DC around 3-4am. Her mother was disappointed that I’m leaving so soon.
I spent last hour of my visit in my girl’s bedroom.
I had really good time in South Carolina; I miss her a lot. I will try to go to her again next month She’s really something
3:30am I left back for DC. First two hours passed ok, but when I passed Charlote I was getting really sleepy. I had to put some gas in the car, and take a leak. I bought big cup of coffie to keep me awake. But unfortunately I spiled some on my pants hehehe It was looking wierd hehehe big yellow spot on the place where my growing is hehehe.
10 miles to Durham Interstate I-85 was blocked. They had some accident and all lines were closed. People were walking away from their cars, seating on the grass and waiting for fire fighters to clean that mess.
It was good thing cause I was sleepy. I turned off the car, and I went to sleep. After hour or so people started honking on me hehehe I was sleeping on the fastest line on the highway hehehe Cars were moving and other people couldn’t go cause I was there blocking the line hehehehe
Rest of my trip was without anything special that I should mention here.
Today at work my Polish friend told everyone that I had that huge chick hehehe Now they making fun out of me. But who cares hehehe
They made up this:
Bottle of Smirnof - $15
Sweater covered with blood - $80
Pilow with blood - $20
Doing blody pork chop priceless.
For everything else is MasterCard