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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

Family - Big Or Small

Sun Nov 13, 2005 7:08 pm

Whats the better Family.A big one with 4-5 Siblings & Parents or the Small one with just one Kid.
Personally I prefer a bigger Family.Whats your call.
Is a Bigger family peaceful.I've heard different stories.
How about your Ancestors.What were their family size like.
regds
MEL
 
jap
Posts: 2196
Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2005 7:25 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Sun Nov 13, 2005 7:31 pm

I'm in a family with one brother only (as well as both parents- they're going on their 20th year of marriage right now). I think I would've preffered more siblings but I'm not sure... as for the one I'd like to have someday...
Probably 1-3 children- I don't think I'd be able to have more kids than that for starters and I don't think I'd be able to take care of them and give them equal attention- which could then break out into a full-fledged war  Silly A single mom is not something I'd like to be, that's for sure...  eek 

My ancestors... well, they certainly seemed to be into big families! 10 children were the norm until my grandmother couldn't have more than 5(!). My aunt had 3, my uncle had 4 and my other uncle had 2 (due to being married late I think. Got his first kid at 35). My parents however only had two (my brother and I) but I think that was due to a few miscarriages my mom had- she simply couldn't HAVE more than 2.
So I've grown up with big families and what-should've-been-big families all around me and I've absolutely loved it... I think I prefer to have 1-3 children myself and have a "smaller" family though (depends on the man too of course).  Wink
 
ScarletHarlot
Posts: 4251
Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2003 12:15 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 2:34 am

Small. I am an only child, and that was fine with me. If I ever have a kid, which is unlikely, I'll probably only have one.

My parents both have (had) big families. I have about a million cousins. Mr. Harlot's parents come from medium size families, so he has a good number of cousins, but not an unmanageable number.
 
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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 2:21 pm

Can having a large family lead to Disputes or I guess it depends on the Individuals concerned.
regds
MEL
 
N1120A
Posts: 28690
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2003 5:40 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 2:48 pm

My mother is the middle of 7 and my father is the youngest of 8, so it is no wonder I am an only child  Silly. I personally want a small, tight knit family like my own. Just a wife, 1 child (2 only if twins) and that's it.

BTW Mel, you are on a posting spree
 
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HAWK21M
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Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 5:29 pm

Personally 2-3 kids ideal.

Quoting N1120A (Reply 4):
BTW Mel, you are on a posting spree

I got a rare holiday & no work to do until 2300hrs tonight  Smile

regds
MEL
 
xr8FordGirl
Posts: 89
Joined: Wed Jun 15, 2005 6:41 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 6:05 pm

Being one of three siblings I vowed to never have an uneven number of kids and I have two boys and I'm NOT having any more.

My husband on the other hand is one of 6 and even though my mother-in-law wanted more than two kids out of her daughter-in-laws that's all she got anyway
 
jap
Posts: 2196
Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2005 7:25 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:29 pm

Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 3):
Can having a large family lead to Disputes or I guess it depends on the Individuals concerned.

All families have disputes (ok, ok... MOST families do...)- big or small. I don't think it matters. I don't think a big family has a bigger chance of having disputes than a small one- of course, in a big family, there're more people to get in an argument with, but I haven't really encountered anything..

I do think it depends on the individuals concerned.

Quoting N1120A (Reply 4):
I personally want a small, tight knit family like my own. Just a wife, 1 child (2 only if twins) and that's it.

I can understand that. However, I must say your kid will be in for a hard time when your wife and you pass and he/she doesn't have a sibling to support him/her emotionally- I know that from my own mother- she wouldn't be here today, had it not been for her siblings and their support.  Smile

Don't worry, I'm not trying to change your opinion- just expressing my own  Smile
 
OYRJA
Posts: 2577
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 7:43 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:39 pm

I'm coming from a family with 5 kids and 2 adults.
I have 2 brothers. 1 is older than me and 1 is younger than me.
And then I have my twin sister and my little sister.

I wouldn't mind have 3 kids when I start a family. I think 1 kid is not enough. If something happens to that child and it dies you suddenly don't have kids left. That is why I want at least 3.
 
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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Tue Nov 15, 2005 6:53 pm

Three Kids is just great spaced 2-3 yrs Apart.
As a Dad. I'd like a Son & 2 Daughters  Smile
regds
MEL
 
SmithAir747
Posts: 1917
Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2004 3:30 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 16, 2005 9:19 am

I come from a large family! At age 3 (in 1978), I was adopted by my "forever family", which consists of 9-10 siblings. All but one were adopted from different family backgrounds; all of us were unwanted by our biological parents because of medical or other disabilities. I myself was given up for adoption by my Irish-native parents due to my severe facial deformities and life-threatening complications. I was raised by an elderly foster mother for my first 3 years of life, while hanging on for dear life with a tracheostomy. My parents, by then with about 20 years experience already with adopting special-needs children, took me onboard and renamed me and baptized me after St. Francis of Assisi (as per a unanimous family vote). My older brothers and sisters helped care for my medical needs as well as my autistic behavior training (my autistic tendencies were due to deafness). Our family ranges from age 25 (my younger sister) to the mid 50s; I'm 30. Now there are 15 grandchildren!

When I was first adopted at age 3, we filled all 14 rooms of our home (which is an ex-funeral parlor), and required 2 big station wagons (1976 Buick Century and 1978 Chrysler LeBaron Town & Country), and we took up an entire pew at church every Sunday! The school run every day was quite an undertaking (because we were spread out between several local schools)! All through my life, I have seen 2 funerals (a brother killed in an auto accident in 1982, and my father in 1995). Also, I have seen no less than 6 weddings in my family! I am an uncle 15 times over, since the birth of my first nephew in 1981. Many of us have gone onto college and careers along with raising their own families. We are scattered all over northeastern Indiana.

My parents are something special, to have raised all of us! My dad served in the US 8th Air Force in Eye, England, during World War 2 (with the 490th Bomb Group) and after the war, spent the rest of his life working for Magnavox. My mother was a factory worker in the 2nd World War, at the huge Douglas C-54 plant that was where ORD is at now. When the two of them met and married in 1950, they started on their lifelong mission of raising a large family--by adopting kids nobody else could handle.

And now here I am, the family member who has ventured the farthest from home, studying at King's College London here in England! I am the "world traveller" of the family!

SmithAir747
 
saxdiva
Posts: 2332
Joined: Sun Jun 20, 2004 6:51 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 16, 2005 9:38 am

Quoting SmithAir747 (Reply 10):
I was adopted by my "forever family", which consists of 9-10 siblings. All but one were adopted from different family backgrounds; all of us were unwanted by our biological parents because of medical or other disabilities.

Man, I can't even be trusted with more than three DOGS. Your parents must have been saints.

Well, then again... you said they named you after St. Francis of Assisi. Does that mean you got your whippings just like all us other Catholic kids?  Wink

-Leanne
 
SmithAir747
Posts: 1917
Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2004 3:30 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 16, 2005 9:50 am

Response to Saxdiva:

Yes, of course, I got my fair share of whippings!

The idea to name me after St. Francis came from my dad, who incidentally was a third-order, lay Franciscan. He wanted to name one of his sons someday after the saint. When my parents first discovered me in a large book (similar to a real-estate catalogue) back in the late 1970s, they immediately fell in love with me (I was only 2 or 3, in need of a loving permanent home). I still have that page to this day--it shows my little 2-year-old skinny form on a swing in a black-and-white photo.

Dad saw something in me that reminded him of St. Francis, so he and Mom put it to a family vote--and I got that name unanimously, and was baptized at our local parish church (St. Mary's in downtown Fort Wayne, IN). My previous name had been Hugh Dermott O'Connor, from my Irish birth parents studying in Indiana.

SmithAir747
 
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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 16, 2005 8:38 pm

Quoting SmithAir747 (Reply 12):
My previous name had been Hugh Dermott O'Connor, from my Irish birth parents studying in Indiana.

Ever met your Biological Parents.
regds
MEL
 
SmithAir747
Posts: 1917
Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2004 3:30 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 16, 2005 9:27 pm

Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 13):
Ever met your Biological Parents.

No, I never met my Irish biological parents; they gave me up immediately after birth to the Indiana state foster care/adoption system. All I know about them is second-hand information: they were graduate students from Ireland, studying at Indiana University in Bloomington (where I was born).

SmithAir747
 
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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Sat Nov 19, 2005 11:48 pm

Quoting SmithAir747 (Reply 14):
I never met my Irish biological parents

Never felt the Currosity to.
regds
MEL
 
User avatar
fr8mech
Posts: 8483
Joined: Mon Sep 26, 2005 9:00 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Sun Nov 20, 2005 1:15 am

My side: a brother and sister. My wife: 2 brothers. We: 1 girl, with 1 undetermined due in June.

My father: 3 brothers, 3 sisters. My mother: 2 brothers, 2 sisters.

My father-in-law: 4 brothers, 1 sister. My mother-in-law: 4 sisters, 1 brother died as an infant.
 
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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Mon Nov 21, 2005 10:21 pm

Nowadays.
Smaller Families with One or Two kids are more common.Guess its Expensive to Run a huge Family.I wonder how the Folks Managed in the Earlier Days.
regds
MEL
 
TLG
Posts: 381
Joined: Sun Jul 17, 2005 3:41 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 6:49 am

My wife comes from a family of 4 kids, and my family has 6 kids. Both of us are the oldest child in our families. We are hoping to have 6 ourselves (we have 1 now with another one coming anytime, due on Friday the 25th!).
 
Matt27
Posts: 2070
Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2003 9:53 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 6:56 am

Mom, dad and two brothers + a dog...
 
USAFHummer
Posts: 10261
Joined: Thu May 18, 2000 12:22 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 6:59 am

Both my parents came from fairly small families (they each had one sibling) and my parents had two kids, myself and my older brother...unfortunately my brother passed away suddenly and unexpectedly when I was 6, so I have been an only child for most of my life, and having seen both sides of the only child issue, I definitely wished I had another sibling...when I start to have a family, I'd like to have 3 kids, I think...

Greg
 
flyingbabydoc
Posts: 1059
Joined: Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:12 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 7:03 am

Quoting SmithAir747 (Reply 10):
My parents are something special, to have raised all of us!

Not only that, but to dedicate themselves to children with special needs. Most admirable. Shame that we don't have more people like your parents in the world.

Alex
 
An-225
Posts: 3859
Joined: Mon Sep 04, 2000 2:55 am

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 3:05 pm

Planning to remain child-free and unmarried.

Alex.
 
ShyFlyer
Posts: 4698
Joined: Fri Jun 19, 2009 11:38 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 3:32 pm

Quoting ScarletHarlot (Reply 2):
Small. I am an only child, and that was fine with me.

Hey, me too!

Everyone tells me that I would make a great father, but I have my doubts. Besides, small children scare me.  scared  And the fact that I can't even clean out my cat's litter box without gagging is another sticking point.  yuck 
 
N1120A
Posts: 28690
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2003 5:40 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 3:37 pm

Quoting Jap (Reply 7):
However, I must say your kid will be in for a hard time when your wife and you pass and he/she doesn't have a sibling to support him/her emotionally- I know that from my own mother-

Well, I certainly know that I will be destroyed when either one, let alone both, of my parents die, given how close we are, but I hope to have my future wife and future child to rely on. Same for my child.

Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 17):
I wonder how the Folks Managed in the Earlier Days.

Well, life was a less expensive enterprise then. One of the biggest changes has been the expense of commuting with suburban sprawl farther and farther from work centers. Additionally, food prices have astronomically (and criminally if you ask me) out paced inflation, particularly fresh fruits and vegetables.
 
QFA380
Posts: 2012
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2005 4:38 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 3:57 pm

I have a brother (very painful), my parents split up so I have 3 half siblings as well that my dad had. Its very different when I go to dads. Going from 3 to 7 people is hard especially when my siblings are 6, 3 and 8, my brother is 11 so I'm the oldest. I think I'd rather have a medium family, 3 kids.

The difference for me is the level of noise. Also its just a mess at dads. My house is rather clean most of the time (excusing my room).

Quoting N1120A (Reply 24):
Additionally, food prices have astronomically (and criminally if you ask me) out paced inflation, particularly fresh fruits and vegetables.

Definately, my dad go's through about AUD$400 a week when we're up there.

Just some of my experiences.

QFA380
 
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HAWK21M
Topic Author
Posts: 30195
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Family - Big Or Small

Wed Nov 23, 2005 6:05 pm

I guess the Big Family starts becoming strong support when the KidsGrow up.
regds
MEL

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