777236ER
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 7:48 am

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
What I meant by the above comment is that I don't need or want to know the details of their bedroom activity.

Yet you want to know what the girl looks like, her name and even where she goes to school!

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
Once she, as a 16 year old girl, married her 40 year old teacher, she became a "public figure" in the US, and thus her "private details" are no longer private.

That's a scary idea. Are you seriously suggesting that no 'public figure' has any private details?! Her entire life, name, address, photos, school, medical records, bank details, dress sizes, shoe sizes, diary, earnings, social security number, ALL of it becomes public knowledge as soon as someone becomes a 'public figure'? You're really grasping at straws here.

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
Again, you just don't get it. the above scenario wouldn't happen where we live. And if it did happen, I wouldn't be upset at all. In fact, I'd relish it, thinking what I would do with the newspaper as soon as I owned it.

I'm sure the scenario HAS happened in the past. When you say 'owned' it, I presume you mean suing the newspaper?
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kmh1956
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 7:50 am

Quoting AndesSMF (Reply 23):
And no, I would not like to have this happen to my two daughters, but the older our kids become, the less control we have over their life decisions.

As a parent, I consider that as long as my child lives under my roof I have a large say in her life decisions. If a parent has 'lost control' over a 16-year old child, Ihave to question whether they hadany control to begin with. I've been very fortunate in my relationship with my daughter. She had strict guidelines growing up, and we had an agreement that we would be completely honest with each other about eveything, no matter what. She has grown into a lovely, responsible, moral, healthy and happy 22-year old young lady and I couldn't be prouder of her.


Oh, and 777236ER and DeltaGator......do I have give you two a time out??  Smile
'Somebody tell me why I'm on my own if there's a soulmate for everyone' :Natasha Bedingfield
 
halls120
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 8:09 am

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 101):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):What I meant by the above comment is that I don't need or want to know the details of their bedroom activity.
Yet you want to know what the girl looks like, her name and even where she goes to school!

Where did I say or imply any of that?

When are you going to answer our questions?

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 101):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):Once she, as a 16 year old girl, married her 40 year old teacher, she became a "public figure" in the US, and thus her "private details" are no longer private.
That's a scary idea. Are you seriously suggesting that no 'public figure' has any private details?! Her entire life, name, address, photos, school, medical records, bank details, dress sizes, shoe sizes, diary, earnings, social security number, ALL of it becomes public knowledge as soon as someone becomes a 'public figure'? You're really grasping at straws here.

 rotfl  Well, again, I never said becoming a public figure means that "Her entire life, name, address, photos, school, medical records, bank details, dress sizes, shoe sizes, diary, earnings, social security number, ALL of it becomes public knowledge as soon as someone becomes a 'public figure." Those are your claims, not mine.

When are you going to answer our questions?

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 101):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):Again, you just don't get it. the above scenario wouldn't happen where we live. And if it did happen, I wouldn't be upset at all. In fact, I'd relish it, thinking what I would do with the newspaper as soon as I owned it.
I'm sure the scenario HAS happened in the past. When you say 'owned' it, I presume you mean suing the newspaper?

 rotfl  Wow, you are a master of the obvious, aren't you?

When are you going to answer our questions?
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
777236ER
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 8:14 am

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):
Where did I say or imply any of that?

So then you agree with me that the information isn't necessary! Good, I'm glad  Smile

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):
Well, again, I never said becoming a public figure means that "Her entire life, name, address, photos, school, medical records, bank details, dress sizes, shoe sizes, diary, earnings, social security number, ALL of it becomes public knowledge as soon as someone becomes a 'public figure." Those are your claims, not mine.

So now you're back tracking. You have to make up your mind. A 16 year old's school address is pretty intimate, why is that acceptable but all the other things I've posted not?

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):
rotfl Wow, you are a master of the obvious, aren't you?

And here's the punch line. If a news outlet published the personal information of your 16 year old girl for doing something illegal, but morally questionable, you'd sue. Yet you see nothing wrong with a news outlet publishing the information of another 16 year old girl for doing something illegan, but morally questionable.
Your bone's got a little machine
 
halls120
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 8:23 am

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 104):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):Where did I say or imply any of that?
So then you agree with me that the information isn't necessary! Good, I'm glad Ê

 rotfl  I don't agree with you on just about any of what we've discussed here. And for the record, her likeness, her name, and her school are matters of public interest because of what she did.

When are you going to answer our questions?

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 104):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):Well, again, I never said becoming a public figure means that "Her entire life, name, address, photos, school, medical records, bank details, dress sizes, shoe sizes, diary, earnings, social security number, ALL of it becomes public knowledge as soon as someone becomes a 'public figure." Those are your claims, not mine.
So now you're back tracking. You have to make up your mind. A 16 year old's school address is pretty intimate, why is that acceptable but all the other things I've posted not?

I'm not back tracking at all. Please show me how I supposedly have.

When are you going to answer our questions?

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 104):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):rotfl Wow, you are a master of the obvious, aren't you?
And here's the punch line. If a news outlet published the personal information of your 16 year old girl for doing something illegal, but morally questionable, you'd sue.

I never said that. Please show me where I did.

When are you going to answer our questions?

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 104):
Quoting Halls120 (Reply 103):Yet you see nothing wrong with a news outlet publishing the information of another 16 year old girl for doing something illegan, but morally questionable.

Don't you mean "Yet you see nothing wrong with a news outlet publishing the information of another 16 year old girl for doing something legal, but morally questionable?"

When are you going to answer our questions?
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
777236ER
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 8:28 am

As you're having obvious difficulty in keeping track of what you've written, let alone with what I've written, I'll leave you to it for the night so you can reflect a bit.

Also give this question a bit of thought: why is it in the public interest to know the name of the girl, what she looks like and where she goes to school? If you can't answer that question adequately, then the information shouldn't be published.
Your bone's got a little machine
 
halls120
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 8:39 am

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 106):
As you're having obvious difficulty in keeping track of what you've written, let alone with what I've written, I'll leave you to it for the night so you can reflect a bit.

 rotfl  I know EXACTLY what I've written. What I want to know is where I've allegedly "backtracked."

I think we all know the answer, which is you can't demonstrate where I've done so, so you're going to slink off for the night and hide.  rotfl 

When are you going to answer our questions?

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 106):
Also give this question a bit of thought: why is it in the public interest to know the name of the girl, what she looks like and where she goes to school? If you can't answer that question adequately, then the information shouldn't be published.

Ah, the grand inquisitor issues yet another arrogant decree. How come you can't bother to answer any one of the many questions posed to you?

Wow. do you even read this thread? As another poster noted, when you take out a marriage license, that fact is part of the local records at the local county courthouse. And open to the public.

Where she goes to school is another easy one. If I were a parent of a potential student in the region where this event took place, I'd want to know which school it was so that I could ensure that the appropriate authorities acted to prevent similar occurrences.

As far as her likeness, once she became a public figure, her likeness is part of the public record.

Sorry you can't handle this. You might want to consider taking this matter up the Supreme Court.

When are you going to answer our questions?
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
deltagator
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 11:53 am

Quoting Blackbird (Reply 95):
First of all, he's not a pedophile, he's an ephebophile-- a pedophile is attracted to pre-pubescent children, an ephebophile is attracted to teenager's (who are obviously pubescent).

Are you a mouthpiece of the Catholic Church? I remember them using that same argument when they had priests diddling altar boys all over the US. You need to tighten that tinfoil hat a bit more and stick to conspiracy theories.

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 107):
When are you going to answer our questions?

He won't. Mainly because he's in too deep to do any sort of backtracking against any reasons and our law that we have set before him. I gave up on arguing with him because he keeps trying to put words in my mouth. It's just not worth the headache arguing with someone who doesn't have the mental capacity to understand someone else's opinion.

Quoting RobertNL070 (Reply 89):
What is the norm? My partner is 7½ years younger than me. Is that abnormal?

Depends on when you met him. If you were in your 20 and he was 13 then yes that is abnormal. If you were 30 and he was 23 then no it's not as strange.

Quoting RobertNL070 (Reply 89):
BTW, I've met my 'cousin-in-law' Brian on several occasions and he is anything but creepy. I'd rather you didn't cast aspersions on my family.

Well I'm glad your cousin-in-law is normal but it's my opinion that the union that created him was outside of the normal. You can take it or leave as I really don't care what you think of my opinion. I'm just stating what I think and I think your aunt has issues to be attracted to such an older man at that time in her life. If you don't want people giving their opinion f what is a strange bit about your family then perhaps I should suggest you don't opn your mouth in the first place.

[Edited 2007-06-25 05:05:51]
"If you can't delight in the misery of others then you don't deserve to be a college football fan."
 
allstarflyer
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 12:07 pm

After hitting Ctrl + F, I'm surprised to find no references to John and Bo Derek.

-R
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ShyFlyer
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 12:59 pm

Quoting Blackbird (Reply 95):
Why did the parents let this marrage go through!?

If I'm recalling their interview on Good Morning America correctly, they (the parents) said they reluctantly agreed to the marriage fearing that doing otherwise would estrange them from their daughter. They also stated that they were "weary" of the situation and just wanted to move on.
I lift things up and put them down.
 
ordryan28
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 2:15 pm

Quoting AA787823 (Thread starter):
40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

I'm sorry, but that's just fucking sick. Obviously, neither were playing with a full deck, nor were the girl's parents who gave their "consent." If a 40 year-old wanted to marry my 16 year-old daughter/sister/cousin I would truly beat him silly.
Whoever said winning is not everything never fought cancer.
 
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EA CO AS
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 6:13 pm

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 99):
I'm not complaining about the right to publish the story, but just of the morality of publishing the information.

I understand, but you also have to see how your choice of this topic as something to find objectionable seems a little strange. I mean, if morality in publishing - or the lack thereof - is truly something you're upset over, why not express outrage over something more meaningful, like information on Paris Hilton's incarceration being published front page, above the fold, whereas the deaths of soldiers in Iraq are relegated to page A-11 ?

Choosing THIS story about THIS girl as the basis of arguing about journalistic integrity smacks of picking an argument solely for the sake of picking an argument.

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):

I think this thread deserves a warning label. Anybody got a copy of the beating a dead horse .gif? I can't find mine.

"In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem - government IS the problem." - Ronald Reagan

Comments made here are my own and are not intended to represent the official position of Alaska Air Group
 
777236ER
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 11:00 pm

Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 112):
I understand, but you also have to see how your choice of this topic as something to find objectionable seems a little strange. I mean, if morality in publishing - or the lack thereof - is truly something you're upset over, why not express outrage over something more meaningful, like information on Paris Hilton's incarceration being published front page, above the fold, whereas the deaths of soldiers in Iraq are relegated to page A-11 ?

Don't worry, I agree entirely that whatever the hell Paris Hilton (or most celebrities) does shouldn't be in any newspaper and that the deaths of soldiers should be front page news. But this thread isn't about that.

Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 112):
Choosing THIS story about THIS girl as the basis of arguing about journalistic integrity smacks of picking an argument solely for the sake of picking an argument.

Half of the stuff written in newspapers can be used as an argument about journalistic integrity in my opinion, including this one. My first comment was quite flippant, but some people decided to jump up and down and scream that I was wrong.

Despite people like Halls120 and DeltaGator clutching at straws, the fact remains that this girl's private details add nothing to the story. They can't justify the inclusion of such information and haven't attempted to do so despite being asked half a dozen times or more. This shows, quite clearly I think, that the information shouldn't have been published.
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ltbewr
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 11:12 pm

ABC's GMA had a follow upon this story this morning about the reaction to it by viewers who posted hundreds of e-mails to them about it. The majority condemned the parents (as well as the coach), but a number were more willing to recognize the complex issues of raising a child, the fears of losing the child completely if they severely reacted and so on.

Yes, unfortunately, people love these very rare but fascinating stories in a perverse way. Many parents fear their child will end up in such a situation and in the last generation, we have really become very fearful about the sexual assault of minors. Politicians push stricter laws in reaction to this fear, and to get votes. Also, their is a generally accepted moral belief that such a relationship is wrong. Such stories will get attention in the media and attention = people reading and watching and more attention for the advertisers.

In the end, we have to look at this much like a complex airline crash. Over time, here were a number of failures by people to make the right decisions or any at all.

The Coach - The real criminal here was the coach. He made the decision to develop a relationship with this girl-woman against the law and generally accepted morality. He took advantage of this girl-woman for whatever perverse reasons he had. I would suspect that he has very serious psychological and emotional problems as to relationships with those of the opposite sex, with a preference for teen girls as can control them better over an adult woman.

The School system and peers of the coach - The should have been better policies to reduce improper contact and behavior between students and adult staff, to encourage peers of both the girl and the coach to report such behavior as would be at any other place of business. If proper policies were in place, then the 'affair' may not have gone very far. There is also a need for better 'character' education in schools on issues including sex and relationships to make up for the lack of it some kids don't get from parents. The school system also didn't deal well with the parents concerns about their beliefs as to the behavior of the coach, perhaps fearful of cost of disciplining the coach, lawsuits and pressure from the teacher's union.

The parents - Like far too many parents for a number of years didn't do their job. Perhaps they both work, didn't have the time to really give the attention to their child, kept track of her friends or activities, didn't check up on or limits their child's use of the internet and cell phone as don't know how to do so. Like too many parents today, they feared disciplining her and as a result they lost control and gave up their responsibility for her. Of course, they NEVER should had given consent for her to marry the coach. Apparently the parents did seek counseling from their ministers, but as one commentator on ABC's GMA noted, perhaps what was needed was family counseling earlier on how everybody could deal with this issues. The parents also could have attended a few of her athletic activity meets and seeing how their child behaved with the coach and peers. It is also possible that the father/mother may have treated their daughter in ways that drove her away from them. The parents also could have physically confronted the coach, even done an act of physical violence upon him as some here suggested they would have done, but most likely that would have led to them facing criminal charges.

Law enforcement - the local law enforcement should have listened to the complaints and concerns of the parents including contacting social services to look at the situation and move on the coach a lot sooner with considering legal actions including possible statutory rape and improper student-teacher, child-adult behaviors.

The girl - The girl should have know that such behavior is not in her best interest, was immoral and illegal, would hurt her relationships with her peers and hurt the coach. Perhaps she had psychological problems too, that triggered her accepting the advances of the coach.

Many of us have seen on TV or in our lives such and similarly distressful situations. As I suggested before as to the complex issues that often cause airline accidents, we can learn from what went wrong here and put into place policy and education to reduce the risk of them in the future.
 
halls120
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Mon Jun 25, 2007 11:19 pm

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 113):
Despite people like Halls120 and DeltaGator clutching at straws, the fact remains that this girl's private details add nothing to the story. They can't justify the inclusion of such information and haven't attempted to do so despite being asked half a dozen times or more. This shows, quite clearly I think, that the information shouldn't have been published.

We can't???? I guess you missed the following.

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 107):
Wow. do you even read this thread? As another poster noted, when you take out a marriage license, that fact is part of the local records at the local county courthouse. And open to the public.

Where she goes to school is another easy one. If I were a parent of a potential student in the region where this event took place, I'd want to know which school it was so that I could ensure that the appropriate authorities acted to prevent similar occurrences.

As far as her likeness, once she became a public figure, her likeness is part of the public record.

Sorry you can't handle this. You might want to consider taking this matter up the Supreme Court.

When are you going to answer our questions?

Let's also address the issue of my alleged backtracking. Here are all of my posts prior to you claim in #104 that I was now "backtracking."

So where have I changed my position?

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 32):
I'm not aware of any legal prohibition on the publication of news stories that involve private marriages. Are you?



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 53):
Yes, but what you stated in reply 17 is that the newspaper in question "had no right" to publish the story. Now you've backed off to "morally questionable" and "inappropriate" descriptions.

Good to see you've corrected your earlier mistake.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 59):
No, I don't. For better or worse, she and her husband are news.

You are the one who keeps making mistakes with regard to what the press is legally allowed to publish.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 62):
hundreds of American teen-aged girls marry their 40 year old track coaches? Every day???



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 62):
Look, I detest the very notion of celebrity. As far as I'm concerned, you could toss every People magazine - and their imitators - in the garbage, and stop broadcasting ET and Access Hollywood forever, and the end result would be good. But that isn't going to happen, because we have a free press in this country, and when people engage in conduct that is otherwise legal, but raises them to the level of celebrity, even if for 15 minutes, - they get their 15 minutes of fame.

AFAIK, every similar story of teacher marrying student that has occurred over the last decade has received widespread coverage. This one was no different.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 62):
Well, when my daughter was 16, she was in the local news. She was co-captain of he field hockey team, and an all league selection. Had Sports Illustrated included her, I'm sure we would have all been thrilled.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 68):
Yes, the marriage was legal. Completely boneheaded, but legal. And very newsworthy. Which makes it fair game for the press.

You need to recognize that the rules regarding the press in this country are different than they are in the UK.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 68):
When I was a military judge, one of my cases involved a particularly nasty case of sexual blackmail, complete with photos. When I got back from the trial, everyone in my office wanted to know if I had brought back copies of the photos.

In the United States, if a teacher marries a student. it's news. And all of the prurient details are fair game in the press.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 68):
probably" a ridiculous marriage?

Again, in the US, the press has every right to cover the marriage of a couple that have become a public figure.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 68):
What this girl wants, and what she can expect in real life, are going to be two different things.

When I was in high school, it was common knowledge that one of my classmates was sleeping with a history teacher. You just can't keep that stuff quiet.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 73):
Maybe in degree, but if it's news, it's covered.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 73):
You are absolutely correct. But you still evidently have a difficult time understanding the fact that in the US, the press has far fewer restrictions placed upon it than in other countries. I can almost guarantee you that every time a news director is given a story like this, he or she will choose to cover it.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 90):
I never said it was a free speech issue.

What is considered private and voyeuristic in the US in different than in the UK.

Why is this difference so difficult for you to comprehend?



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 90):
When they engage in conduct that makes them a public figure, children have to expect to lose their right to privacy.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 90):
Maybe that is the case in the UK, but that is NOT the case in the US.

What I'm wondering is what has prompted you to embark on this crusade to change the standards of the US media?



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 92):
I don't care about what they do in the bedroom. But did the press report these sordid details? Is there some film I missed?

Let me frame the issue differently.

10 years ago, I got divorced. When I started dating after the marriage ended, my then-17 year old daughter told me numerous times "Dad, whatever you do, PLEASE don't date anyone under thirty. That would be so gross."

You think a 16 year old ought to me able to marry a 40 year old former teacher with no repercussions and no public interest. Good for you. But in this country, most people regard such relationships as "gross" whether you like it or not.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 92):
Your frenetic rantings over the past 91 posts, for starters. Either the press in the UK behaves differently on matters such as these, or you've taken on the awesome responsibility of being the single moral compass of the US media. Which one is it?



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 92):
OK. We get it. YOU don't think the details of this relationship ought to be fair game in the press. Despite all your angst, they ARE fair game in the US. Stories like this have been reported on for years, because the news media knows that there is great interest in a story like this.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 92):
Well, when my daughter went to one of her high school proms with an African-American, it didn't make the news, because it wasn't newsworthy. Same as if she had came out as gay. But if she had come home at 16 to tell me she was dating one of her teachers, and that we they were going to be on the 6 o'clock news, I would have been angry. Not at the media, at her.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
Says who? You? The US Constitution?



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
You are taking my comment out of context - no surprise, I might add. What I meant by the above comment is that I don't need or want to know the details of their bedroom activity. Nothing more.

What you mean by "dropping my concerns" is a mystery.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
here you are once again demanding that we answer your questions, yet you don't give us the common courtesy of answering ours. I see that in addition to being the sole moral arbiter of what should be covered in the US press, you've now adopted the position of grand inquisitor.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
Once she, as a 16 year old girl, married her 40 year old teacher, she became a "public figure" in the US, and thus her "private details" are no longer private.

Again, I understand how you detest this fact. But it is the way the press freely operates IN THIS COUNTRY. None of your angst and outrage is going to change it anytime soon.

I recommend you sit down, pour yourself a good scotch, and relax a bit.



Quoting Halls120 (Reply 100):
Again, you just don't get it. the above scenario wouldn't happen where we live. And if it did happen, I wouldn't be upset at all. In fact, I'd relish it, thinking what I would do with the newspaper as soon as I owned it.
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
ajd1992
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:02 am

Ok, i'm probably gunna get flamed like a whopper here, but nuts to it.

I personally don't think it's all that bad. Ok, the age gap is 24 years, but age isn't a restriction on love. Same as these pro gay marriage things, "it's about love, not gender". Well, what about "it's about love, not age"

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 105):
legal, but morally questionable


..... Is what we're dealing with here. Some people think homosexuality is morally questionable, but we don't see people bitching about it. Some people think 2 teenagers under the age of consent sleeping together is wrong, but nobody does anything about it.

My 2 pence.
 
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KaiGywer
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:25 am

Quoting LTBEWR (Reply 55):
All 4 of them should be in jail (the girl in Juvenile detention) , with the ex-coach getting the full time for stat rape

What did the girl do that was illegal? Or anybody else for that matter?

Quoting BHMBAGLOCK (Reply 66):

Generally, they do other than the address of the school.

Cause generally they are out of school Big grin

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 67):
Really? Without a person's permission? If you get marriage in the US do wedding photos, names and ages automatically appear in local newspapers?

Photos are submitted by the couple (or family), but names, ages and hometown are supplied.

Quoting DeltaGator (Reply 78):
As I also said in an earlier message I'm glad I can put a name and a face to a future welfare recipient in North Carolina. That way when our family vineyard has to raise rates on our wine because of higher taxes we know at least one of the yahoos responsible for it while they suck up welfare resources.

Although it might happen, it is a vastly broad generalization.
“Once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, an
 
andessmf
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:37 am

Quoting Kmh1956 (Reply 102):
If a parent has 'lost control' over a 16-year old child, Ihave to question whether they hadany control to begin with.

If you don't have control at 16, you lost it long time ago. You and I both know that. All parents make mistakes, and live with the consequences of their mistakes.

Quoting DeltaGator (Reply 88):
She was 17 and he was 25 years older so 42.

Amateurs! My mother was born in 1940 and my father was born in...1914. Do the math.

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 91):
Who are you to judge?

Plenty here are judging what happened. Regardless of whether we like it or not, this marriage is NOT illegal.

If we start a topic about gay marriage, many of you would use would flip your arguments completely.
 
halls120
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:51 am

Quoting Ajd1992 (Reply 116):
I personally don't think it's all that bad. Ok, the age gap is 24 years, but age isn't a restriction on love. Same as these pro gay marriage things, "it's about love, not gender". Well, what about "it's about love, not age"

If he had not been her teacher, the 40/16 difference might have been a little bit more palatable.

In the US, whenever a teacher starts having sexual relations with a student, it's news. It might not be the same in the UK, but that's the way it is here.

Quoting Ajd1992 (Reply 116):
..... Is what we're dealing with here. Some people think homosexuality is morally questionable, but we don't see people bitching about it. Some people think 2 teenagers under the age of consent sleeping together is wrong, but nobody does anything about it.

 Wow! Are you suggesting that two 16 year olds sleeping together is remotely similar to a 40 year old teacher seducing his 16 year old student?
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 3:25 am

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 119):
In the US, whenever a teacher starts having sexual relations with a student, it's news.

That's why I never told anyone about me and my English teacher when I was in 11th. grade.  Wink
Bring back the Concorde
 
777236ER
Posts: 12213
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2001 7:10 am

RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 4:05 am

Quoting KaiGywer (Reply 117):
Photos are submitted by the couple (or family), but names, ages and hometown are supplied.

Exactly. So if a couple don't want photos published, they're not. Certainly school addresses aren't!

Quoting AndesSMF (Reply 118):

Plenty here are judging what happened. Regardless of whether we like it or not, this marriage is NOT illegal.

If we start a topic about gay marriage, many of you would use would flip your arguments completely.

You're 100% accurate.

The real problem, in my opinion, isn't the age gap (which is their own busiess) but rather the student-teacher aspect. In my opinion there should be blanket bans on all student-teacher relationships, regardless of whether it's high school, college or university. It's inappropriate in a number of ways.
Your bone's got a little machine
 
andessmf
Posts: 5689
Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2006 8:53 am

RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 4:16 am

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 121):
The real problem, in my opinion, isn't the age gap (which is their own busiess) but rather the student-teacher aspect

Of course, that brings the whole relationship into question, since the girl saw the teacher as a person of authority. And also, this comes from women, many women have told me that if the father does not provide sufficient love and approval towards their daughter, their daughter would look for another man to do so.

Quoting 777236ER (Reply 121):
In my opinion there should be blanket bans on all student-teacher relationships, regardless of whether it's high school, college or university. It's inappropriate in a number of ways.

Brings up way too many questions. But the problem is, that in matters of love (whether the love is real or not), others have almost no say in what any couple feel and do. Sometimes the criticism is counter-productive, causing long-term damage to the relationship the couple has with other people.

When I got married, many criticized my future wife and MY decision. Those who did have not found any forgiveness for their criticism from us, and this happened over 10 years ago.

This is why, while difficult to understand, I don't fault the parents for allowing this marriage to occur, since if (I believe is more when) this marriage breaks up, their daughter would come to them for comfort.
 
777236ER
Posts: 12213
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2001 7:10 am

RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Tue Jun 26, 2007 4:20 am

Quoting AndesSMF (Reply 122):
Brings up way too many questions. But the problem is, that in matters of love (whether the love is real or not), others have almost no say in what any couple feel and do. Sometimes the criticism is counter-productive, causing long-term damage to the relationship the couple has with other people.

When I got married, many criticized my future wife and MY decision. Those who did have not found any forgiveness for their criticism from us, and this happened over 10 years ago.

This is why, while difficult to understand, I don't fault the parents for allowing this marriage to occur, since if (I believe is more when) this marriage breaks up, their daughter would come to them for comfort.

Yes, I agree. But in the case of student-teacher relationships there are just so many ways that it's inappropriate that there has to be some sort of action taken. I would like to see blanket bans on them, which I know a lot (if not most) institutions have. Student-teacher couples can stay together and get married if they want, but the teacher definately should lose their job.
Your bone's got a little machine
 
ajd1992
Posts: 2390
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RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Wed Jun 27, 2007 1:11 am

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 118):
If he had not been her teacher, the 40/16 difference might have been a little bit more palatable.

In the US, whenever a teacher starts having sexual relations with a student, it's news. It might not be the same in the UK, but that's the way it is here.

It's the same way here. But, this marriage isn't illegal. Immorality and something that's illegal are totally different.

Quoting Halls120 (Reply 118):

Wow! Are you suggesting that two 16 year olds sleeping together is remotely similar to a 40 year old teacher seducing his 16 year old student?

No, i'm just stating that some people consider 2 people under 16 that are having sex immoral, so why should this cause a fuss? Ok, the teacher/student aspect is a good reason as to why, but that doesn't really make it news worthy, especially to this degree.

Also, i wouldn't call this "seducing", it's gotta be a 2 way thing, especially as it's ended up in marriage.
 
RobertNL070
Posts: 4164
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 4:29 am

RE: 40 Year Old Marries 16 Year Old!

Wed Jun 27, 2007 4:29 am

Quoting DeltaGator (Reply 108):

Well I'm not even going to waste time responding to that, except to comment that there are some pretty weird, "creepy" judgements and sweeping assumptions being made there.

Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 112):
smacks of picking an argument solely for the sake of picking an argument.

Not the first time that has happened  biggrin 

But of course none of the in disbelief head-shaking, hand-wringing, heterosexual forty- or fifty-something-year old men here and elsewhere have ever ogled a pretty young lady of sixteen, seventeen, eighteen years old with thoughts very much below the belt  biggrin 

Robert
Born to be wild ...... until about 9 p.m.
Home = RTM, Rotterdam The Hague.

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