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MSYtristar
Topic Author
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Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 5:54 am

So yeah a person who I trusted to no end just abandoned me (literally) at a local watering hole. I have gone out of my way to be there for this person since I met her three years ago. But I was taken advantage of big time tonight and I feel freaking terrible. Rant is over.
 
BN747
Posts: 7937
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RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 6:12 am

Don't sweat it bro...just guzzle down a few more....take some aspirin or Tylenol (for tomorrow's headache) ...and whatever you do..

...DO NOT have misgivings tomorrow and go crawling and begging back..do that and she'll really set you up to be pushed off a STEEPER cliff at your worst hour..

Hang in there champ!

BN747
 
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Aaron747
Posts: 17988
Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2003 2:07 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 7:09 am



Quoting BN747 (Reply 1):
Don't sweat it bro...just guzzle down a few more....take some aspirin or Tylenol (for tomorrow's headache) ...and whatever you do..

finishing the sentence properly...whatever you do, spend the next several months having casual relationships with women who are interested in mind-blowing sex rather than playing games. There may yet be some gameplay, but it should be the kind you want to do over and over and over again, starting from the next day on  Wink

Do that and you'll forget about this waste of time excuse for a woman in no time.
 
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HAWK21M
Posts: 30184
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RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 9:21 am

Look at it this way.....Be practical.........You liking someone not necessary the other person would reciprocate too in the same way.
Its a tough time for you but remember time is the best cure.
Try thinking less about what went wrong rather think what I can do better ahead.

You tried your best & thats what matters.
regds
MEL
 
don81603
Posts: 1105
Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2005 12:07 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 2:53 pm

Hey dude, it's her loss. I was with someone for over 13 years before her true colours came into sight. After the inevitable, it came to light she'd been playing the game for years without being caught. a year later she came crawling back. That was the best laugh of my life.

But my suggestion is, and I know how hard it can be, just forget the twit, and move onwards and upwards. Like BN747 implied... She had her chance and screwed you big time. Don't give her the chance to do it again. Go bend your elbow with some friends, get it out of your system, and keep your head up, and move forward.
 
BN747
Posts: 7937
Joined: Thu Mar 28, 2002 5:48 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 6:52 pm



Quoting Don81603 (Reply 4):
Hey dude, it's her loss. I was with someone for over 13 years before her true colours came into sight. After the inevitable, it came to light she'd been playing the game for years without being caught. a year later she came crawling back. That was the best laugh of my life.

Amen brother, 13 years??? Holy Hell...you need to write a book! Or one needs to be written about you...you're one of those 'quality guys' that chicks dump on (in this "man's world") that ruins it for those chicks spending their life looking for 'the perfect guy'! I have no idea how you coped with a 13 year relationship unmasked as a farce. I don't know how I'd remain mentally stable under that cloud. That's 'postal material'...but then again, odds on favorites are there are millions of 13+ years 'cheating men' out there. And don't get me boxed in here..there are actual situations where cheating has 'kept relationships together'. I believe there are situations where cheating is actually necessary...but to do so when leading the partner/spouse to believe everything is kosher and fidelity is paramount...now that is lame!

BN747
 
WellHung
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RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 7:03 pm



Quoting MSYtristar (Thread starter):
I have gone out of my way to be there for this person since I met her three years ago.

There's your problem.
 
allstarflyer
Posts: 3262
Joined: Mon Jan 10, 2005 7:32 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 9:04 pm



Quoting WellHung (Reply 6):
Quoting MSYtristar (Thread starter):
I have gone out of my way to be there for this person since I met her three years ago.

There's your problem.

Yeah, if she's not of reputable character, if you're not married to her, and if you didn't grow up w/her . . . that's a huge risk. Here's to you finding a girl to make you forget about her.
 
don81603
Posts: 1105
Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2005 12:07 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 9:46 pm



Quoting BN747 (Reply 5):
That's 'postal material'

She wasn't worth the price of a bullet. I treated her well, gave her almost everything she could want. My sweetest revenge was, she'd always wanted a Caribbean vacation, but we never seemed to find the money, so within 6 months of separating, I was on my way for 2 weeks in the Dominican Republic, and as we worked in the same place, she knew I went, and I made sure she heard through the office grapevine that I'd had a good time. Who says the best revenge in served cold?  Wink
 
N1120A
Posts: 27311
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2003 5:40 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 10:00 pm



Quoting MSYtristar (Thread starter):

Machino, the woman doesn't deserve you bro. Make like you ditched her and don't bother calling.
 
BN747
Posts: 7937
Joined: Thu Mar 28, 2002 5:48 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 10:37 pm



Quoting Don81603 (Reply 9):
She wasn't worth the price of a bullet. I treated her well, gave her almost everything she could want. My sweetest revenge was, she'd always wanted a Caribbean vacation, but we never seemed to find the money, so within 6 months of separating, I was on my way for 2 weeks in the Dominican Republic, and as we worked in the same place, she knew I went, and I made sure she heard through the office grapevine that I'd had a good time. Who says the best revenge in served cold?

LOL..good one!

I didn't mean postal literally..I'm just reflecting on the crimes of passion you hear about of guys (largely here in the US of A) wiping out their office or SO's friends/family when shit goes South. But your 13 year involvement and the discovery of wrong doing.. is remarkable patience (& character).

I guess with my mindset..I'd have to map out the Ultimate revenge...take her back, even beg her back (or whatever it took)..and a day or so later..let her walk in on the BIGGEST surprise of her life -- yeah..I'd feel a whole lot better shouting out..'Don't let the door hit you on the way out!"

But your revenge was sweet..good job!

BN747
 
af773atmsp
Posts: 2550
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RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 10:48 pm

I have a friend that doesn't seem to like me (as a friend) anymore. I asked her a few times during the summer if she wanted to hang out. She said she couldn't for good reasons so I trusted her. My other friend asked her if she still likes me (as a friend). My friend told me that she said we are still friends, but she will busy during the weekends for the next two months. Its very hard to believe that she will be busy every weekend for the next two months. But maybe she is telling the truth but I don't know. Now I walk alone at my new school.
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9923
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 10:50 pm



Quoting BN747 (Reply 1):
...DO NOT have misgivings tomorrow and go crawling and begging back..do that and she'll really set you up to be pushed off a STEEPER cliff at your worst hour..

I agree. You can do better than her. Besides, she is only one fish... There are millions more in the sea. Go after them.

Quoting VonRichtofen (Reply 8):
Kick the bitch to the curb...

He can't. See below....

Quoting MSYtristar (Thread starter):
Walked Out On Me

She walked out on him, Von. Kinda late for that now.

Quoting N1120A (Reply 10):
Make like you ditched her and don't bother calling.

 checkmark 

Quoting Don81603 (Reply 9):
She wasn't worth the price of a bullet. I treated her well, gave her almost everything she could want. My sweetest revenge was, she'd always wanted a Caribbean vacation, but we never seemed to find the money, so within 6 months of separating, I was on my way for 2 weeks in the Dominican Republic, and as we worked in the same place, she knew I went, and I made sure she heard through the office grapevine that I'd had a good time. Who says the best revenge in served cold?  wink 

Wished I did that to my last ex-gf when we broke up over 3 years ago. We wanted to do a HNL trip. Crap! BUT.... I give you props!  Smile
 
redflyer
Posts: 3920
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2005 3:30 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 10:50 pm



Quoting MSYtristar (Thread starter):
So yeah a person who I trusted to no end just abandoned me (literally) at a local watering hole. I have gone out of my way to be there for this person since I met her three years ago. But I was taken advantage of big time tonight and I feel freaking terrible. Rant is over.

Listen, Brother: you are feeling terrible because YOU are the one that is in this s**t hole and you can't see beyond this event. So whatever you do, don't be harsh on yourself or her for the situation. Just take it from the rest of us, who are not mired in the same situation and can still see clearly (which you can't) and believe us when we say better days are ahead. And if/when I'm in the same situation, I hope you will give me the same advice.

The problem with human emotions are that they cloud out the big picture. Always remember that.

Quoting WellHung (Reply 6):
Quoting MSYtristar (Thread starter):
I have gone out of my way to be there for this person since I met her three years ago.

There's your problem.

There is no "problem" with being a good guy. The world needs more of them. Whatever this hosebag's issues are, she will eventually come around to missing his company.
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 11:00 pm

MSYtristar:
Don't sweat it man.
Your next girl will be younger and hotter!  yes 
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9923
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 11:16 pm



Quoting Superfly (Reply 15):
Your next girl will be younger and hotter!  yes 

I agree with Superfly on these kinds of threads. I have a gf who is younger and hotter!  Wink
 
LASoctoberB6
Posts: 1936
Joined: Thu Nov 09, 2006 4:23 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 11:19 pm



Quoting Superfly (Reply 15):
younger

...Hopefully not cradle-robbing young...

Do something that makes you happy. And don't play sad and depressing music.. It doesn't help any..
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 11:27 pm



Quoting LASOctoberB6 (Reply 17):
Hopefully not cradle-robbing young...

As long as it's legal and they're both happy is all I am saying.

Quoting LASOctoberB6 (Reply 17):
And don't play sad and depressing music.. It doesn't help any..

 checkmark 
 
LASoctoberB6
Posts: 1936
Joined: Thu Nov 09, 2006 4:23 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Fri Sep 12, 2008 11:56 pm



Quoting Superfly (Reply 18):
As long as it's legal and they're both happy is all I am saying.

I know, I know, just giving you a hard time, that's all.  Wink

Quoting Superfly (Reply 18):
Quoting LASOctoberB6 (Reply 17):
And don't play sad and depressing music.. It doesn't help any..

  

The words from Madea..
 
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airportugal310
Posts: 3794
Joined: Sun Apr 11, 2004 12:49 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sat Sep 13, 2008 2:13 am



Quoting Don81603 (Reply 9):
She wasn't worth the price of a bullet. I treated her well, gave her almost everything she could want. My sweetest revenge was, she'd always wanted a Caribbean vacation, but we never seemed to find the money, so within 6 months of separating, I was on my way for 2 weeks in the Dominican Republic, and as we worked in the same place, she knew I went, and I made sure she heard through the office grapevine that I'd had a good time. Who says the best revenge in served cold?

I did the same thing circa 3 years ago...broke up with the girl of 2+ years and the same weekend jetted off to London-town with a female friend (thats all it was trust me) and since we worked in the same place..it was great...because she saw me at the check in line for Continental with the travel buddy!

Ahh...i hear she is still pissed about that!
 
MSYtristar
Topic Author
Posts: 7543
Joined: Sat Aug 27, 2005 12:52 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sat Sep 13, 2008 4:16 am

Thanks for all the advice/suggestions/feedback. I got the obligatory "I made such a huge f'ing mistake!" email today from her. I read it, had a decent laugh, and then promptly deleted it. This ship has sailed.
 
don81603
Posts: 1105
Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2005 12:07 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sat Sep 13, 2008 11:52 am



Quoting Msytristar (Reply 20):
I read it, had a decent laugh, and then promptly deleted it.

Myself, I'd have said "Yeah, you sure did, but your loss was (any woman's name)'s gain."
 
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airportugal310
Posts: 3794
Joined: Sun Apr 11, 2004 12:49 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sat Sep 13, 2008 11:58 am



Quoting Don81603 (Reply 21):
Myself, I'd have said "Yeah, you sure did, but your loss was (any woman's name)'s gain."

If you say that, then she might think that you were seeing someone else while seeing her. This only happened a few days ago so it would be unlikely that he found someone else in that short time period..

On the other hand, who cares wtf she thinks at this point right?
 
SpeedBirdA380
Posts: 335
Joined: Sat Jul 26, 2008 9:57 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sat Sep 13, 2008 12:12 pm

Personally I would not advise being nasty or mean to her. Be courteous and civil to her even after what she did to you.

Then she will realise she has made a massive mistake and what a great guy you really are.(Well I dont know you but Im guessing)!
 
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HAWK21M
Posts: 30184
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sun Sep 14, 2008 10:16 am



Quoting Msytristar (Reply 20):
This ship has sailed

Its Important not to carry along the Bag of hate memories in case you bump up against the same person in future.....Be normal.
regds
MEL.
 
MSYtristar
Topic Author
Posts: 7543
Joined: Sat Aug 27, 2005 12:52 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Sun Sep 14, 2008 10:27 am



Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 24):
Its Important not to carry along the Bag of hate memories in case you bump up against the same person in future.....Be normal.

Yeah I would never be mean or spiteful to anyone. I imagine I'll run in to her again at some point since we have a few mutual friends.

Quoting Superfly (Reply 14):
Don't sweat it man.
Your next girl will be younger and hotter!

Well, we'll see how it goes.  Wink

Quoting AirPortugal310 (Reply 22):
On the other hand, who cares wtf she thinks at this point right?

That's pretty much how I feel. I mean I wouldn't go off on her or anything, and honestly if this happened to me three/four years ago, my reaction would have been different. Now, it's just like "wow, that sucked...ok, move on."
 
BN747
Posts: 7937
Joined: Thu Mar 28, 2002 5:48 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Tue Sep 16, 2008 12:03 am



Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 23):
Personally I would not advise being nasty or mean to her. Be courteous and civil to her even after what she did to you.

Then she will realise she has made a massive mistake and what a great guy you really are.(Well I dont know you but Im guessing)!

Whoa...whatever you do..don't listen to this fella! Talk about a TGV train down Suicide Lane..! Sorry SpeedBird..but that 'pocket novel' scenario only plays out in that..'pocket novels and books'..women (and men) don't behave like that in real life..esp. given the details of this particular incident.

BN747
 
CX747
Posts: 6902
Joined: Tue May 18, 1999 2:54 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Tue Sep 16, 2008 1:20 am

One of the most important things you can do is to listen to the advice of those not "embroiled" in the situation. All of us lose sight of reality when matters of the heart go wrong. We don't know all of the details to this story but the fact of the matter is, she hurt you. She seems to have realized this but would someone who truly cares for you allow herself to hurt you in the first place? Nobody is going to be perfect, but try to take a 70,000ft view of the situation like a U-2 and see WHY she did what she did. Don't sugar coat it for yourself. If you have a good friend (Not a Yes Man) ask him his opinion.

Don't burn any bridges and don't treat her poorly. With that said, don't allow her any room to get back into your heart or try to rebridge what you once had. Take some time and think about yourself, her and what YOU want. IF you talk to her, again IF you talk to her, see WHY exactly she did what she did. Don't allow for any bullshit explanations. Those normally have, "I don't know", "I can' tell you why", "It will never happen again".
 
BN747
Posts: 7937
Joined: Thu Mar 28, 2002 5:48 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Tue Sep 16, 2008 2:12 am



Quoting CX747 (Reply 27):
One of the most important things you can do is to listen to the advice of those not "embroiled" in the situation. All of us lose sight of reality when matters of the heart go wrong. We don't know all of the details to this story but the fact of the matter is, she hurt you. She seems to have realized this but would someone who truly cares for you allow herself to hurt you in the first place? Nobody is going to be perfect, but try to take a 70,000ft view of the situation like a U-2 and see WHY she did what she did. Don't sugar coat it for yourself. If you have a good friend (Not a Yes Man) ask him his opinion.

Here are the facts 'according to MSYtristar...

He was 'there for her' from day one.

That translates into 'there were many moments that this person was 'needy' more than necessary..whatever the details. And he answered the bell each and every time.

He extended great trust to her..

This means he shared some of his inner most secrets and feelings.

He was taken advantage of big time.

A clear sign that this person got a lot of mileage out of this relationship leaving and imbalance in the 'give and take' equation.

...so basically any person who after all this, opens that door again is a person asking to have his/her heart ripped out and slam-dunked into a trash can.

..in other words, the response of a fool in this day and age!

I understand the act of forgiving and examining wrongs in an effort to salvage a relationship...this however is one that has breached rubicon. Now if the above actions (translations) are true...and you factor in the fact that women know how to play men with the accuracy of a laser in a CD player..then a man is clearly a FOOL to open that door and try it again. And it is the second half of that equation that you 'give it another try' types are greatly discounting!


BN747
 
CX747
Posts: 6902
Joined: Tue May 18, 1999 2:54 am

RE: Walked Out On Me

Tue Sep 16, 2008 2:37 am

I don't want to get off topic because the important part of the this he has moved on/ made up his mind on how to handle the situation. No matter what we did, it was up to him to make a decision he would be happy with.

As for me, I never said to give it another try. I did say that taking a step back and reviewing the situation might be a good idea. Going back with someone who hurt you severly is never a good thing.

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