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captaink
Posts: 4010
Joined: Wed May 23, 2001 10:43 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:24 am



Quoting WESTERN737800 (Reply 48):

I'm also not sure where the line is between "expressing interest" and "harassing".

I think the line is defined in the response of the other person. I mean you know when a girl is interested.

You mentioned all the things you like to do, but when you just meet a girl that wouldn't come to the forefront, and whats more not all girls like the same type of guy so it is a serious tasks on find a girl that likes you. But don't give up that is why it is called the dating game. If it doesn't work out well it doesn't move on to the next, don't go falling in love on the very first kiss.

Tips:
Be confident. You are a grown man you know what you are doing, you know what you want. If such is not the case, well the girls doesn't need to know that. Big grin
Don't be needy, or mention all your future plans on the first date, especially the future planes you may be conjuring up in your mind with her. That can scare a girl away.
Don't try to hard, i mean doing all the things you think girls like. Most men we don't have a clue. Every girl is different. SO the key is really to be yourself, girls tend to go for that, if by being yourself, to them you are charming.

Those are the 3 things I can think of off the top of my head.

Next the place?

Bars are great, I have always had luck there and my current girlfriend possibly future wife I met in a bar a long time ago. It is relaxing there are drinks, but it is not too loud so a conversation is possible.

How do you get a girls attention. Well walk around a bit, see who is there, throw some smiles, not perverse just pleasant polite ones. Then when you see a girl that you like, and she also seems to have an interest, go to her and say some thing nice, a compliment maybe, BUT NOT SOMETHING CLICHE. And from there you're off. Typical questions to get to know someone. I like to leave asking the name till later on, cause if she is not comfortable or maybe you aren't either well what is the point of giving your name. If all goes well, then exchange emails. ( I prefer that than telephones, from virtual world you can get the telephone and somewhere along the line set up a date.) You are on your own from here..:D

Sometimes I find it helpful or even necessary to have a wingman, or a group of buddies. I mean if a girl sees a guy just walking around a bar alone, well that just looks a little off. SO make it seem as if your objective that night was to hang with your mate.

Relax man, take your time, you will be fine.
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pwm2txlhopper
Posts: 1454
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:27 am

I think the problem is, that basically, you're a nice guy? The problem is that nice guys finish last! It's sad, but true about 80% of the time. Some people will say that's not true, especially woman, but the reality is that woman don't want a nice guy! They want somebody to pursue them, and at times they expect you to show some aggression and take the lead. They want somebody that's confident most importantly, as well as exciting. When a guy is too nice, or never flirts, or never tries to make a move on them, after a short time this guy will be categorized as "just a friend" and no matter what you have to offer, after you've been put in this group it's almost impossible to ever get that woman to consider you as romantic material ever again! That's why you've got to make your self stand out and be attractive to her relatively soon after you've met her. Don't wait and try to be friends first, or be a gentleman. You're just screwing yourself if you do that! Trust me, I'm almost 30, I've had the same problem as you, and it's taken me until recently to figure out what the hell my problem was! The problem was that I was being to nice, too boring, too polite, too uptight, and not acting like what a woman expects a man to be like.

Nice guys finish last even more often when they are still in their teen to mid-twenties and dating people in the same age group. As somebody else mentioned, girls that age aren't looking for husband material, they're looking for the moment, not the future, and they want somebody fun, exciting, and confident. Not nice, passive, and gentlemanly like.


Quoting Alaska737 (Reply 5):
Read "The Game" by Neil Strauss

It will change your life, that is a promise, he has other books you can read but this is the bible of getting women.

Exactly! Dating is a big game, if you don't know how to play, or aren't good at it, you''ll loose almost every single time to another guy that knows how to play!
Trust me, I spent years in this situation.

Not that I suggest being a dickhead, but chances are if you turned into more of an asshole, you'd probably meet more girls, have more dates, and get laid more often.
So, it's either be a nice guy and wait for ever to eventually find that one special person, and in the mean time be single and horny, or you can go on the prowl like males are genetically programmed to do, and probably have more success. It sucks, but it's the truth! I wish I had accepted this about a decade ago, instead of approaching 30!
 
IgneousRocks
Posts: 73
Joined: Mon Dec 15, 2008 3:06 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:27 am

You want some advice from someone nearly 20 years your senior? Chill.

Enjoy the sh^t out of your 20s and early 30s - and by all means stay single.
-Travel (Panama, Paris, Perth, where ever, just go)
-Join an adults co-ed sports league
-Invest in yourself (clothing, good health and physical fitness)
-Stay the h%ll out of debt
-Take classes, learn Spanish or French etc

You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Parlay that confidence to talking with women you meet when you are out. You - and others - may scoff at this advice but it works. Many stripers are actual very nice women (secretaries, students, college grads) trying to make extra cash, but try not get hung up on one.
I can take your igneous rocks or leave 'em. I relate primarily to micas, quartz, feldspar.
 
diamond
Posts: 3000
Joined: Sun Apr 11, 2004 8:01 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:27 am

Quoting Lincoln (Thread starter):
I speak fluent sarcasam but know how to keep it under control.

Sarcasm is rooted in anger. A woman with even slight intuition can pick up on that. It can be really funny - but while they're laughing at your sarcasm, they're realizing that it's a huge negative. Unless you're Simon Cowell or David Letterman and can turn sarcasm into a full-time career, consider removing it from your approach.


When you spend a few minutes talking with a potential date, are you a great listener? After 10 minutes, how much did you really learn about her? And were you open enough to let her know an equal amount about you?


Are you a person of strong opinions or do you consider yourself truly easy-going? Politics? Religion? Morality? Movies that you dislike? If on the first date, you've told her all about your 'values', then you've given her plenty to differ with.


Eye contact? Do you lock-in or look away.


Shyness can be a really amazing positive, if it's clear to the person you're with that you're so interested in her that you're really working through your shyness to connect with her. Of course, if you're too intense you'll come across like Ted Bundy!

[Edited 2009-05-04 20:41:12]
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captaink
Posts: 4010
Joined: Wed May 23, 2001 10:43 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:31 am



Quoting IgneousRocks (Reply 52):
You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Priceless.. HAHA

Why didn't I meet you 10 years ago. But you are correct and I never thought of that.. Big grin
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skygirl
Posts: 256
Joined: Tue Nov 06, 2007 2:22 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:59 am



Quoting DocLightning (Reply 31):
Sorry, honey, we all know better.

I know, but it's fun to pretend sometimes.

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 31):
So the question is: did it work?

Had I not been dating someone at that time, I would say yes. I really was caught off guard by it, but it drove my curiosity. Thought it was cool. And stuff.

Quoting IAirAllie (Reply 33):
One of the problems I noticed is it great to be well rounded but the sensitive guy thing is a bit of a myth. We don't really want jerks but we do want MEN. We want our men to be strong, confident enought to pursue us. We want to feel secure.

I have tried to express this to so many people (both guys AND girls) so I'm glad to hear someone else say it. Almost all the girls I know say they want a nice guy and I always say they want a good guy, cause there is a world of difference between a nice guy and a good guy.

Quoting Tugger (Reply 37):

well played.

Quoting Lincoln (Reply 38):
If you ever wind up in Cleveland

It's been close to a year...over a year since I was there. It was ridiculously cold and I had drinks at the winking lizard.
...Now they face an even greater danger...Tyrannousaurs in F-14's!!
 
sv7887
Posts: 1259
Joined: Tue May 20, 2008 7:31 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 4:01 am



Quoting Captaink (Reply 54):

Quoting IgneousRocks (Reply 52):
You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Priceless.. HAHA

He's completely right. Some of my friends dragged to one and by the end of night I had one of the girls and a few waitresses talking to me about investing in the stock market. The bouncer was laughing his ass off. It was quite entertaining and they were all nice girls. I still get made fun of about that, "You went to a strip club and didn't do anything but talk business, you moron!"
 
hercppmx
Posts: 159
Joined: Mon May 26, 2008 8:25 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 4:15 am



Quoting IgneousRocks (Reply 52):
You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Just don't become dependent, I know a lot of guys that will spend there entire pay checks in strip clubs, for lack of a better social life.

Heres a new idea, Join a gym. There are a ton of young beautiful women who are really into fitness. To shy, get a female personal trainer $30-50 for an hour, just as a young fit woman to talk to, it may help with confidence, and since they work at the gym they know a lot of the people who are there often maybe a match maker.
C-130; it's a love-hate relationship
 
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DocLightning
Posts: 21834
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 3:36 pm



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 38):

If you ever wind up in Cleveland, give me a ring and we'll see if you get that microwave Wink

Now THAT was a pick-up line! Well done! (clapclapclapclap)

Quoting Lincoln (Reply 38):
90% of my "nice" wardrobe at this point is the Express 1MX dress shirt.

Good. Make sure you're getting them small enough. For the jeans, Express is not the way to go. But because you're slender, you want boot cut. One thing my ex taught me, if you aren't fat, then tighter is better.

Quoting HercPPMX (Reply 57):

Heres a new idea, Join a gym.

NICE idea. Tons of hot girls around and the side-effect is that you get ripped from it.
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
prosa
Posts: 5389
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 05, 2009 4:23 pm

The single most important bit of advice: don't act needy.
Under absolutely NO circumstances should you act as if a woman is doing you a huge favor by being in your company. Do not become infatuated with any woman who smiles at you. Women are ***far*** more perceptive of nonverbal cues than men are. They can sniff out neediness in men a long way off, and if they do so the men haven't a chance.
"Let me think about it" = the coward's way of saying "no"
 
AA757MIA
Posts: 262
Joined: Fri May 16, 2008 2:04 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 4:06 am



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 38):
Suggestions for retailers/brands/etc? Finding anything in a 30 waist-32 inseam can be a bit of a challenge at the department stores I've tried, let alone, ahem, well fitted.

Department stores? You're still young, I would try American Eagle, Old Navy, Hollister, Aeropostale, GAP, etc, etc... they usually have nice clothes for all ages and at reasonable prices.
 
kiwiinoz
Posts: 2000
Joined: Mon Oct 10, 2005 3:07 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 4:49 am



Quoting IgneousRocks (Reply 52):
You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Definitely disagree with this one. If he's not confident with women, this scenario will teach his subconcience that women only talk to him for money. Not to mention that it will set unrealistic expectations of how attentive women can be with very little prior interaction/groundwork.

Strip clubs are good for a laugh, anatomy lessons, bucks nights....but enhancement of social skills?.....no way.
 
ALexeu
Posts: 1447
Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2007 9:01 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 9:33 am

Don't worry, be happy! It will come when you least expect it.

Btw, many a.nutters mentioned confidence. I don't even know what is the definition of confidence, and the difference between confidence and egoism. Any ideas?
 
us330
Posts: 3506
Joined: Tue Aug 08, 2000 7:00 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 1:04 pm



Quoting IgneousRocks (Reply 52):
You want some advice from someone nearly 20 years your senior? Chill.

Enjoy the sh^t out of your 20s and early 30s - and by all means stay single.
-Travel (Panama, Paris, Perth, where ever, just go)
-Join an adults co-ed sports league
-Invest in yourself (clothing, good health and physical fitness)
-Stay the h%ll out of debt
-Take classes, learn Spanish or French etc

You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Parlay that confidence to talking with women you meet when you are out. You - and others - may scoff at this advice but it works. Many stripers are actual very nice women (secretaries, students, college grads) trying to make extra cash, but try not get hung up on one.



Quoting KiwiinOz (Reply 61):
Definitely disagree with this one. If he's not confident with women, this scenario will teach his subconcience that women only talk to him for money. Not to mention that it will set unrealistic expectations of how attentive women can be with very little prior interaction/groundwork

Igneous Rocks, I am 23 and could not agree with you more. Basically, focus on yourself and become confident with yourself right now. If you do that, luck with the ladies should follow.

As for strip club advice--sorry Kiwi, I will have to disagree with you on this one. For someone with very little confidence at all with women (basically, starting from gound zero), strip clubs can be a huge boost to your confidence (as long as you don't mind spending money), and can get you started going down the right path.
Now, admittedly, one should wean oneself off of strip clubs before one turns into a person like that which Kiwi describes, but going a couple of times isn't going to hurt.
 
MD11Engineer
Posts: 13899
Joined: Sun Oct 26, 2003 5:25 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 1:17 pm



Quoting Sv7887 (Reply 56):
Quoting Captaink (Reply 54):

Quoting IgneousRocks (Reply 52):
You wanna build your confidence with women? Easy, go to a strip club before you go a regular bar. As silly as it sounds, strip clubs will give you confidence to talk to very attractive women who will talk to you (for a $20, but this is an investment, remember?).

Priceless.. HAHA

He's completely right. Some of my friends dragged to one and by the end of night I had one of the girls and a few waitresses talking to me about investing in the stock market. The bouncer was laughing his ass off. It was quite entertaining and they were all nice girls. I still get made fun of about that, "You went to a strip club and didn't do anything but talk business, you moron!"

Reminds me of the great theoretical physicist and Nobel laureate Richard P. Feynman. Besides being a first class elementary particle physicist, he was a bit of an excentric, he used to play the drums and draw pictures as a pastime. In his autobiography, he described how he became a regular in a strip club, not so much to ogle the girls, but to use them as models for his sketches. By and by he got respected by the women and often went there if he needed some peace to work on some scientific problem. He would simply sit at a table in a corner and calculate some weird physics problem, or he would watch the girls and draw them in his sketch book. (and often present them with a drawing). Sometimes they would come and sit down with him for a chat, but at the same time they would keep people away from him, who would disturb him. He wouldn't drink any alcohol, because he, at some time, was very close to becoming an alcoholic, so he would sit there for the whole evening drinking coke.

Jan
Je Suis Charlie et je suis Ahmet aussi
 
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DocLightning
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 7:22 pm



Quoting Sv7887 (Reply 56):

He's completely right. Some of my friends dragged to one and by the end of night I had one of the girls and a few waitresses talking to me about investing in the stock market. The bouncer was laughing his ass off. It was quite entertaining and they were all nice girls. I still get made fun of about that, "You went to a strip club and didn't do anything but talk business, you moron!"

I went to Stanford for college.

Do you have any idea how many of those girls worked in strip clubs? TONS. Really good money if you're trying to put yourself through school.

Now, they might have been beautiful women, but they were Stanford women. In other words, beauty and brains CAN exist in the same woman.
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 8:05 pm



Quoting DocLightning (Reply 65):
Now, they might have been beautiful women, but they were Stanford women. In other words, beauty and brains CAN exist in the same woman.

...and very high maintenance.  eek 
Bring back the Concorde
 
kaneporta1
Posts: 737
Joined: Wed Jun 01, 2005 12:22 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 9:35 pm

Here's some advice:

A young couple on their first date walk into an upscale jewellery store.
The man tells the woman: "Just pick anything you want and I'll buy it for you!"
The woman is really excited about this and starts looking around immediately.
After a while she comes back with a pair of diamond earrings.
"How much?" the man asks the store owner.
"$10000" replies the owner, rather surprised by this, as the couple is young and don't seem the really rich type.
"No problem" replies the man, "I'll write you a cheque"
"That's fine, but I will have to call the bank to verify that the cheque won't bounce" says the owner.
"Sure, go ahead" replies the man.
"Well, since it is Friday afternoon and the bank has now closed, I won't be able to do it until Monday morning" says the owner.
"I'll tell you what..." the man responds. "You hold on to those earrings and the cheque and call the bank first thing on Monday. When the cheque clears, call me and I'll come pick up the earrings."
"Ok, I'll do just that." responded the store owner.
The couple left the jewellery store with the girl being all over the guy and unable to contain her excitement.
Monday morning, at exactly 9am the man's phone rings:
"Hello?"
"Hello sir, it's the jewellery store owner..."
"Hi..."
"I'm afraid I have some bad news. I called the bank a few minutes ago and they informed me that your account does not have sufficient funds.."
"Yeah, i know, that's fine"
"But sir, don't you want those earrings any more?"
"Who cares about the earrings, I just spent the whole weekend having the time of my life with that girl! Goodbye."

Hope this gives you an idea or two...
I'd rather die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather, not terrified and screaming, like his passengers
 
skygirl
Posts: 256
Joined: Tue Nov 06, 2007 2:22 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 06, 2009 9:36 pm



Quoting DocLightning (Reply 58):
Now THAT was a pick-up line! Well done! (clapclapclapclap)

Indeed it was, and well delivered. (clapclapclapclapclap)

Quoting AlexEU (Reply 62):
Btw, many a.nutters mentioned confidence. I don't even know what is the definition of confidence, and the difference between confidence and egoism. Any ideas

To me, confidence is being able to look in a mirror and feel comfortable with the reflection on the other side. It's not being ashamed of who you are. Having a God sized ego is looking in the mirror and saying that there is no greater creation on the face of the planet and everyone must bow down to me and honor the supreme being that I am.
...Now they face an even greater danger...Tyrannousaurs in F-14's!!
 
sv7887
Posts: 1259
Joined: Tue May 20, 2008 7:31 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Thu May 07, 2009 2:37 am



Quoting MD11Engineer (Reply 64):
Reminds me of the great theoretical physicist and Nobel laureate Richard P. Feynman. Besides being a first class elementary particle physicist, he was a bit of an excentric, he used to play the drums and draw pictures as a pastime. In his autobiography, he described how he became a regular in a strip club, not so much to ogle the girls, but to use them as models for his sketches.

I actually went back a few more times to just hang out there. They usually had baseball games on Friday nights, so I'd go there to watch them and talk to people. I never drank, just talked to them when it wasn't too busy. We ended up debating world politics, the financial markets, and I concluded my visits by giving them a lecture on subprime derivatives and how tough they are to price. It was fun, they knew I wasn't into the strip club scene but found their life stories quite fascinating. I'd always get hugs from all the girls, and all the paying patrons thought I was insane. Good times though, probably the craziest thing I ever did..

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 65):
Do you have any idea how many of those girls worked in strip clubs? TONS. Really good money if you're trying to put yourself through school.

Now, they might have been beautiful women, but they were Stanford women. In other words, beauty and brains CAN exist in the same woman.

Oh definitely. Most of the girls were in the local Boston schools. We had everything from pre med to engineers there. They were pretty cool and well educated. It was one of the nicer clubs outside of Boston. Most girls went West to avoid being recognized in the downtown clubs.
 
haggis79
Posts: 535
Joined: Tue Jun 27, 2006 8:05 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Thu May 07, 2009 2:44 am



Quoting STT757 (Reply 1):
I know this one is going to sound weird but I know some people who have had good luck with online dating websites, a friend of my Wife just married this guy who really is handsome.

 checkmark 

I met my beloved wife at an online dating website....  bouncy   cloudnine   couple 
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DocLightning
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Thu May 07, 2009 1:48 pm



Quoting Superfly (Reply 66):

...and very high maintenance. eek

I'd hope that a woman with a Stanford degree would know how to take care of herself.

My friend Nicole describes herself as high-maintenance. And she is. Weekly tanning, weekly Brazilian waxes, twice monthly beauty parlor, make-up, etc.

But she's also a physician and she does it all herself. So they might need a lot of maintenance, but modern women tend to self-maintain. At least, IMHO, the ones worth keeping do.

Better than a lot of gay men do, anyway.  Yeah sure
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Thu May 07, 2009 7:40 pm



Quoting DocLightning (Reply 71):
My friend Nicole describes herself as high-maintenance. And she is. Weekly tanning, weekly Brazilian waxes, twice monthly beauty parlor, make-up, etc.

But she's also a physician and she does it all herself. So they might need a lot of maintenance, but modern women tend to self-maintain.

I know plenty of women like that and they too can't figure out why they are still single.

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 71):
At least, IMHO, the ones worth keeping do.

I guess that's where we disagree.
Bring back the Concorde
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7184
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat May 09, 2009 5:35 am



Quoting Lincoln (Thread starter):

Based on everyting I've read/heard/etc. it seems like I should be someone's ideal catch... but here I am....asking for pre-dating advice on A.net (again).

Dude it's almost disturbing how similar you are to me, well, minus the ADHD part and I'm waaaaaaay more cynical, arrogant, and smartassed than you'll ever be. But deep inside i'm a big cuddly teddy bear. I think....

Quoting FlyDeltaJets87 (Reply 29):

That makes two of us. I've never had (nor really come close to) a serious relationship. Only I'm 21, not 25. I go to Embry-Riddle so its not like we have a large female population here so maybe my view on all this is somewhat skewed.

Make that 3ish. I've only had one "relationship" with some sorority hooker and ya'll know how f'ed I became afterwards from all my rants on that psychobitch on these boards  crazy 

Quoting Steeler83 (Reply 30):
don't try so hard to find a woman.

Funny but it's true. It's when I try hardest when I seem to have the least luck with women. The few times I've had good female encounters I was totally not expecting it or looking for it. What pissess me off is that I just can't turn of my "opposite-sex-needyness" with a switch. I have to be extremely busy with other things for me to overlook women.
 
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DocLightning
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat May 09, 2009 5:41 pm



Quoting FLY2HMO (Reply 73):

Make that 3ish. I've only had one "relationship" with some sorority hooker and ya'll know how f'ed I became afterwards from all my rants on that psychobitch on these boards

Oh yes, yes. But we also heard about how much you loved that sex.
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7184
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 12:14 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat May 09, 2009 6:10 pm



Quoting DocLightning (Reply 74):
But we also heard about how much you loved that sex.

Oh I did, but that's the only good thing I have to say about her, but heck, maybe its not so much of a good thing if you think how many guys she had to screw before me to reach her better-than-pornstar abilities.  yuck 
 
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Tugger
Posts: 10608
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat May 09, 2009 9:55 pm



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 38):
As stupid as it sounds, part of the reason I want a relationship is I want someone who's needs I can put in front of my own. Right now I can do pretty much anything I want whenever I damn well want -- including waking up, going to work, coming home from work... It's boring, old, and unfufilling.

Definitely remember that your are never "sacrificing yourself" for someone else (shouldn't be). That will lead you into an impossible relationship. She can't save you, you can't save her. And if you ever are in a relationship with someone who does need "saving" and she (or you) does recover/heal, in the end, once the healing has occurred you won't be the right person anymore.

Quoting HercPPMX (Reply 40):
It was a typo, but I must say well played my friend, well played

Yes, I figured that (mental) but I just had too much fun!

Quoting WESTERN737800 (Reply 48):
I am 31 and there's no prospects in my life. I used to get frustrated about it, but I know it'll happen when it happens.

I was 31 when I met the woman for me. When I was 28 I made a goal of having a house, a wife, and a good job (and hopefully kids as well) by the time I was 35. Of course when I was 31 and had no prospects, a not so good job, no savings , and was still living in a bachelor pad with three roommates, things didn't looks so good. But then it happened, I met her at a group I was part of (part of my "keeping busy") and we started talking about something we both had in common (beyond the group) and things too off from there. And believe it or not I did have a good job, a house, a wife, and kids on the way by the time I was 35. The life I wanted. Crazy.

Quoting FLY2HMO (Reply 73):
I have to be extremely busy with other things for me to overlook women.

Well, never be to busy to keep your eyes open to someone who is interested in you. In fact it is when you are too busy in your own life, doing things you need to do and like doing that you are most likely meet the women that are most compatible with you! I know, there is no easy answer...

Quoting Superfly (Reply 72):
Quoting DocLightning (Reply 71):
.... she does it all herself. So they might need a lot of maintenance, but modern women tend to self-maintain.

I know plenty of women like that and they too can't figure out why they are still single.

I believe the most of the time its because that person is used to doing everything themselves in precisely the way they are doing it. And when you introduce an outside person, they interfere with that "perfection", the habits they have and that causes friction. And anyone who is in a relationship knows that their partner/spouse/whatever causes all sorts of disruption in their lives. Most often this is good and beneficial and the things done are done with love and care, and is part of what fulfills the couples life together. But if can't stand to miss you bikini wax or you can't stand not taking care of yourself (controlling your life) then you will wonder why you can't find someone even though you are "perfect".

Tugg
I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. - W. Shatner
There are many kinds of sentences that we think state facts about the world but that are really just expressions of our attitudes. - F. Ramsey
 
Superfly
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat May 09, 2009 9:58 pm



Quoting Tugger (Reply 76):
But if can't stand to miss you bikini wax

I consider a bikini wax a huge negative.
Give me an all natural bush.  Smile
Bring back the Concorde
 
MCOflyer
Posts: 7088
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat May 09, 2009 11:20 pm



Quoting FLY2HMO (Reply 73):

Make that 3ish. I've only had one "relationship" with some sorority hooker and ya'll know how f'ed I became afterwards from all my rants on that psychobitch on these boards

Make that 4ish. Since my engagement/ break up in 06 I have had two girlfriends and no relationships. Recently I asked my good friends what is wrong with me and I've been told nothing; It will come. Recently I started getting noticed and have had the opportunity to go out on dates with money grubbers, and I refused for that very reason.

KH
Never be afraid to stand up for who you are.
 
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EA CO AS
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sun May 10, 2009 8:59 am



Quoting Lincoln (Thread starter):
sensitive guy

 redflag 

And there's one of the biggest problems.

Let me guess - you're every girl's friend, you constantly hear from them how you'll "make some lucky girl very happy someday" while they date guys who treat them like crap and then cry on your shoulder when things fall apart, they ask you for advice about men and the whole time you're wanting to scream, "Hey, how about giving ME a chance?"


At the end of the day, getting the girl of your dreams comes down to two things:

1. Getting her interested
2. Keeping her interested

And I'm afraid to say it, but being the "nice guy" who's a "great catch" just doesn't matter worth a damn while you're under 35 years old. Being good-looking and having the makings of a great husband just doesn't cut it at that age. I played the nice guy for years and all it got me was a severe lack of sleep fielding those 3am phone calls from girls I desperately wanted to date, yet only wanted to cry to me about the most recent loser they dated and were hurt by.

Y'know, because I was such a good friend. A good, safe friend. Which is maddening.

I did a lot of online dating, and sure, it'll sometimes get you laid - but unless you drop the "gosh-I'm-a-nice-guy-looking-for-a-nice-girl" routine you'll waste tons of money on first dates that don't go anywhere beyond a first date.

So after wasting countless hours and literally thousands of dollars on pointless date after pointless date I heard about this "Doc Love" guy from AskMen.com. His gimmicky "system" sounded too good to be true, and being a skeptic, I didn't pursue it. But I was curious, and in the end, my curiosity got the better of me. I ordered it, and spent time listening to the CDs and reading the books.

Oh.

My.

God.


What a difference! It completely changes the way you look at women, because it completely changes your mindset regarding starting, developing and continuing relationships with women. It's NOT about how to become a cold jerk or anything like that, but rather a system that enables even the nicest nice guy to keep a woman's interest level up.

Again, this is NOT about fundamentally changing who you are in any way - it's just a way of changing the way you react to women that ultimately keeps them more interested. Nothing sleazy, underhanded or morally questionable is coached.


Now at the time, my longest relationship with a girl had lasted a month. After ordering and studying this guy's material and applying what I'd learned, I met a nice girl and it turned into a year-long relationship! After that relationship ended, I went back to applying the methods discussed and soon met an amazing girl who I can guarantee I'd never have met if not for trying this system.

We've been married for nearly 3 years now (together for six) and even though she laughs about it, she's read these books and insisted we let my single best friend - another nice guy - learn it.

Three months later he met a girl. They got married this past October.


All I'd say is that this "Doc Love" guy's "system" has made a huge impact on my life and the life of my best friend. I hope you'll check it out and that it has similar results for you.

http://www.doclove.com/why_order.htm

Quoting Superfly (Reply 77):
I consider a bikini wax a huge negative.
Give me an all natural bush.

Why? Floss is not only cheap, but comes in different flavors too!  Wink
"In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem - government IS the problem." - Ronald Reagan

Comments made here are my own and are not intended to represent the official position of Alaska Air Group
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sun May 10, 2009 11:20 am



Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 79):
So after wasting countless hours and literally thousands of dollars on pointless date after pointless date I heard about this "Doc Love" guy from AskMen.com. His gimmicky "system" sounded too good to be true, and being a skeptic, I didn't pursue it. But I was curious, and in the end, my curiosity got the better of me. I ordered it, and spent time listening to the CDs and reading the books.

Oh.

My.

God.

...or even better.

http://www.nomarriage.com/

Lincoln should pay very close attention to this part;

http://www.nomarriage.com/worthless.html

Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 79):
Why? Floss is not only cheap, but comes in different flavors too! Wink

True but none come in the natural woman flavor.  Smile
Bring back the Concorde
 
lincoln
Topic Author
Posts: 3133
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sun May 10, 2009 4:30 pm



Quoting Kaneporta1 (Reply 67):
Hope this gives you an idea or two...

Yes and no. I have money (not a ton, but enough to not worry about it -- a little over 6 months of my gross pay/10 months of net pay saved "for a rainy day"), my family has money.

I know it's unreasonable at this age to expect that I'll meet a "financial equal" -- I've been very lucky/in the right place at the right time -- but I don't want a relationship where the major attraction is money.

Quoting Skygirl (Reply 68):
Quoting DocLightning (Reply 58):
Now THAT was a pick-up line! Well done! (clapclapclapclap)

Indeed it was, and well delivered. (clapclapclapclapclap)

Thank you, [[bows]] -- you gave me something to work with (and the possibility of offending you wasn't on the radar). Usually I don't have anything to play off of.

Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 79):
All I'd say is that this "Doc Love" guy's "system" has made a huge impact on my life and the life of my best friend. I hope you'll check it out and that it has similar results for you.

I'll check it out.
I don't get calls in the middle of the night from women who are "just friends" -- but I only have 4 or so in that category... one of whom I would love to take things further with (but she doesn't feel the same way... and that was before the digression to "just friends" status), the other 3 I've never really felt a spark with
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DocLightning
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Mon May 11, 2009 6:26 am



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 81):

Thank you, [[bows]] -- you gave me something to work with (and the possibility of offending you wasn't on the radar). Usually I don't have anything to play off of.

OK, you're gonna offend a few women. And if they are offended at having a cute guy hit on them, then they can blow it out their ear.

Remember the joke about "sure I get slapped a lot, but I get a lot of screwing done, too!"

So you offend some woman. You'll never see her again. In my dad's words: "f*ck her! Or don't!"
-Doc Lightning-

"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
-Carl Sagan
 
AirframeAS
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Mon May 11, 2009 6:51 am



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 14):
Quoting Alaska737 (Reply 5):
Read "The Game" by Neil Strauss

I shall seek this title out.

There is also another good book called: "How To Succeed With Women " By Ron Louis and David Copeland. A funny book, but a real good read!
A Safe Flight Begins With Quality Maintenance On The Ground.
 
lincoln
Topic Author
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 1:59 am

Ok... Still single here, and haven't had time to follow up on any of the books but.

I went to Cedar Point* for the first time today (took a vacation day to celebrate my 25th birthday which was Thursday). Holy F--- S--t, this where all of the cute women in Cleveland are when they aren't at bars. My mental "Ooh, she's cute, wonder if she's single" alarm was pretty constant -- and that was filtering out those who were ovbiously under age.

Got into a conversation with a really cute red head in line/next to me on one of the coasters (I have a thing for athletic red heads... maybe 'cuz they're exceptionally rare in their natrual form) and then I found out... she was there with a school group. A high school group. Oh to be 4 years younger  Sad

Lincoln
--
* - Cedar Point, a large amusement park, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cedar_Point. I've wanted to go since I moved to Cleveland but the schedul has never worked out during the season. They opened for this season on Saturday and I said, "Screw work, I'm taking a vacation day, and I'll deal with the pile of crap on Tuesday". I did not regret the decision Big grin
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Superfly
Posts: 37705
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 9:47 am



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 84):
Holy F--- S--t, this where all of the cute women in Cleveland are

Didn't know Cleveland had any.  rotfl   rotfl   rotfl   rotfl 

Quoting Lincoln (Reply 84):
(I have a thing for athletic red heads... maybe 'cuz they're exceptionally rare in their natrual form)

Plenty out here jogging in the park and past my place.
Bring back the Concorde
 
Alias1024
Posts: 2655
Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2004 11:13 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 6:26 pm



Quoting Skygirl (Reply 55):
Almost all the girls I know say they want a nice guy and I always say they want a good guy, cause there is a world of difference between a nice guy and a good guy.

 checkmark 

This is why most women give the worst possible advice to guys. They don't even know what they are attracted to.

Quoting Lincoln (Reply 84):
I went to Cedar Point* for the first time today (took a vacation day to celebrate my 25th birthday which was Thursday). Holy F--- S--t, this where all of the cute women in Cleveland are when they aren't at bars.

Does this seem odd to anyone else?
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems with just potatoes.
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7184
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 8:57 pm



Quoting Superfly (Reply 85):
Didn't know Cleveland had any.

Quoting Alias1024 (Reply 86):
Does this seem odd to anyone else?

Well, my ex was from the outskirts of CLE, and she was a model...

[Edited 2009-05-19 13:59:31]
 
Alias1024
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 9:24 pm



Quoting FLY2HMO (Reply 87):
Does this seem odd to anyone else?

Well, my ex was from the outskirts of CLE, and she was a model...

I don't doubt that Cleveland has some attractive women.

I was referring to the supposed wealth of attractive, single women at Cedar Point amusement park. Last time I went to an amusement park, the only women in their 20s were either employees, there with a guy, or had at least one kid in tow. I would have never though of an amusement park as a good place to meet women.
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems with just potatoes.
 
Superfly
Posts: 37705
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 9:24 pm



Quoting FLY2HMO (Reply 87):
Well, my ex was from the outskirts of CLE, and she was a model...

Did you meet her at Cedar Point?
Bring back the Concorde
 
WestJetForLife
Posts: 704
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2005 3:37 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 9:32 pm



Quoting Lincoln (Thread starter):

Just do what I do, Lincoln. Go to a pub, club or bar with a couple buddies, go dance/karaoke/whatever and hopefully chat it up with some ladies.

Just don't do what my buddy did last weekend and obsessed over 3 cute ones that were less interested in him and more interested in myself and my other friend. If they don't want you, then they will tell you straight to your face, and your night is ruined.

Just go out there and make yourself known (in a good way) to the ladies of the world. It's guaranteed to work. Just be yourself, relax, put a smile on your face and don't shy away from a dance or six, even if you have had a few drinks and your dancing style looks like you're having a seizure standing up.

Just go for it, and if you get shot down, then try try again!

Nik
I need a drink.
 
lincoln
Topic Author
Posts: 3133
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2004 11:22 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 10:45 pm



Quoting Alias1024 (Reply 88):
I was referring to the supposed wealth of attractive, single women at Cedar Point amusement park. Last time I went to an amusement park, the only women in their 20s were either employees, there with a guy, or had at least one kid in tow. I would have never though of an amusement park as a good place to meet women.

There seemed to be a wealth of either recent college grads (and a couple of the folks I conversed with were definately in this category) or folks who were just celebrating the end of another school year

Of all of the parks I've been to Cedar Point in general (and excluding the fact that it was "High School Physics Day") had a much more mid-20s/early-30s feel than any other park I've been to.
CO Is My Airline of Choice || Baggage Claim is an airline's last chance to disappoint a customer || Next flts in profile
 
Alias1024
Posts: 2655
Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2004 11:13 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Tue May 19, 2009 11:48 pm



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 91):
There seemed to be a wealth of either recent college grads (and a couple of the folks I conversed with were definately in this category) or folks who were just celebrating the end of another school year

Of all of the parks I've been to Cedar Point in general (and excluding the fact that it was "High School Physics Day") had a much more mid-20s/early-30s feel than any other park I've been to.

Very interesting. I've never been to Cedar Point, but it might be worth checking out next time I'm in that neck of the woods.  Big grin

You mentioned you have a few good female friends. Do you think any of them would be interested in being a wingwoman for you?
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems with just potatoes.
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7184
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 12:14 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed May 20, 2009 1:05 am



Quoting Superfly (Reply 89):
Did you meet her at Cedar Point?

No, long story, met at IAH during my internship. She's from the Warren/Youngstown/Kent area.
 
FlyDeltaJets87
Posts: 4479
Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2006 3:51 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Fri May 22, 2009 1:39 am



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 91):
Quoting Alias1024 (Reply 88):
I was referring to the supposed wealth of attractive, single women at Cedar Point amusement park. Last time I went to an amusement park, the only women in their 20s were either employees, there with a guy, or had at least one kid in tow. I would have never though of an amusement park as a good place to meet women.

There seemed to be a wealth of either recent college grads (and a couple of the folks I conversed with were definately in this category) or folks who were just celebrating the end of another school year

Of all of the parks I've been to Cedar Point in general (and excluding the fact that it was "High School Physics Day") had a much more mid-20s/early-30s feel than any other park I've been to.

Were you there this past Monday? I was there on Monday as well and Teeny-Bopper Day was annoying haha.

I got to ride Maverick for the first time though. And if you noticed anyone wearing an Orange Club G'itmo t-shirt around the park, that was me.  biggrin 
"Let's Roll"- Todd Beamer, United Airlines Flight 93, Sept. 11, 2001
 
lincoln
Topic Author
Posts: 3133
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2004 11:22 pm

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Fri May 22, 2009 2:10 am



Quoting FlyDeltaJets87 (Reply 94):
Were you there this past Monday? I was there on Monday as well and Teeny-Bopper Day was annoying haha.

Yeah  Smile
It was my first time in the park even though it was one of the reasons I moved to Ohio-- my 25th was last Thursday-- there was no way in hell I was going opening weekend, and I figured "weekday... most schools are still in...should be pretty dead". Wrong.

Definately worth blowing a vacation day, though... Now I only need to figure out to do with 17 more of them by 12/31.

Saw plenty of wild math- and physics- related T-shrts, but no Orange Club G'itmo (that I remember)
CO Is My Airline of Choice || Baggage Claim is an airline's last chance to disappoint a customer || Next flts in profile
 
FlyDeltaJets87
Posts: 4479
Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2006 3:51 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Fri May 22, 2009 3:01 am



Quoting Lincoln (Reply 95):
Quoting FlyDeltaJets87 (Reply 94):
Were you there this past Monday? I was there on Monday as well and Teeny-Bopper Day was annoying haha.

Yeah
It was my first time in the park even though it was one of the reasons I moved to Ohio-- my 25th was last Thursday-- there was no way in hell I was going opening weekend, and I figured "weekday... most schools are still in...should be pretty dead". Wrong.

It was my second trip to the park - I took a 3 day trip up to Cedar Point back in 2006. They were building Maverick at the time. My cousin at Ohio State warned me about Teeny-Bopper Day but I didn't really have a choice to avoid it. That Monday was the only day of the weekend I was up in Michigan that I could go. I still got on all the good rides though - Maverick, SkyHawk, Mean Streak, Magnum XL 200, Top Thrill Dragster, Raptor, Power Tower, and after two hours of waiting in line and holding out that they would get the ride working again, finally got on Millennium Force around 8:00-8:15 that night. Millennium Force is the best overall ride there in my opinion.  Smile


Just too bad that all the ladies there that day were jailbait.
"Let's Roll"- Todd Beamer, United Airlines Flight 93, Sept. 11, 2001
 
Ken777
Posts: 10078
Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2004 5:39 am

RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Fri May 22, 2009 5:18 am



Quoting Skygirl (Reply 16):
I know it's not easy. I'm pushing 25 myself (albeit I have the rest of the year to enjoy 24) and I have my mom on my back always asking if I've met anyone yet, my dad saying he'd like to walk one of his daughters down the aisl

I know the feeling about mothers. Mine was determined that I did not turn out like my father who lasted until he was 27. By the time my voice started changing she was worried no one would have me. To be honest, I that age I wouldn't know what I was getting even if someone would have had me. After 10+ years of panic my mother was delighted with my luck in finding a wife, as was I. 40 years last month.

So tell your mother that you met a really nice guy on the boards and he is an engineer. Not as good as a doctor, but the doctor turned out to be gay.  Smile, or should it be  Sad? You might even check his upcoming flights. If interested tell lincoln to wear a flower behind either ear on a specific flight and you can check him out.

Quoting Us330 (Reply 26):
Not unless you are into Italian and Latinas (which I'm generally not).

Maybe international will surprise you. Did me - married an Aussie. The only challenge with Italian and Latino would be their passion and fiery temper. Might be too much for an engineer/programmer.

Quoting Skygirl (Reply 28):
not say things like 'is that a mirror in your pocket?

Can DocLightning borrow that line?

Quoting Skygirl (Reply 28):
ADHD

I have that, but I never pay attention to it . . .

Quoting EMBQA (Reply 32):
Also, take a look...some areas have 'singles' events.

Church is a good example. The best side of this situation is that there will be some worried mothers (about their 25+ year old daughter) and news will travel fast.

Another avenue is to find a new friend who is female, Jewish, married and (hopefully) with at least one child. They are on the road to being a Jewish Mother (but will deny it) and will work on your situation. If you happen to be Jewish it will make things easier for her and she will try twice as hard.

Quoting IAirAllie (Reply 33):
You were doing great up to this point Kiwi!

But he might be able to. Would that make a difference?

Lincoln - I think you'll be fine as long as you don't worry about the situation.

I was very lucky in that I dated a gal in high school that pretty well established an idea of what I was looking for in a wife. Simple things like intelligence, sense of humor, able to have a long, interesting conversation, etc. It helped in college as I was able to stand back and see how the girls I dated compared. I was also able to observe a lot of friends and the girls they dated and married - which, oddly enough, was a very good lesson for me and they are all still married!

I think that there are "panic" times for people who fear it is too late for them. The first panic can hit at high school graduation - lots of babies are made that night, with marriage and a job at the filling station shortly to follow.

During the Vietnam War (and probably true in all wars) there are pre-deployment panics when he (or she) who is being deployed panics and gets married before going to war.

A lot of people hit the panic button when university graduation is coming up. This is especially true for those who hoped to find a spouse at school.

Get past these and there can be a panic simply because you didn't find "The One" (non-politically speaking) for the rest of your life.

But you are now moving into a new arena - the post-graduate co-ed. This gal is about finished with law school or is in med school. Over their heads in studies, but not for long. They'll be rather busy after graduation because their first "job" is like that. But then most will hit the professional panic: the biological clock will start ticking a bit louder.

And you're available. Sweet.

So for now, simply relax. Stash money away. Buy a house when you can afford it. With falling house prices, low interest rates and the $8,000 first time buyers tax credit you'll be in pretty good shape to get a house than can handle 2 or 3 kids with ease. Lots of DIY and the married women in the neighborhood will start thinking of all their single friends, daughters, and other relatives.

Most of all, enjoy each year as you only get it once. At 65 I can look back and see too many that I missed, one way or another.
 
flinhion757
Posts: 229
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Wed Jun 03, 2009 4:54 am



Quoting Lincoln (Thread starter):
Based on everyting I've read/heard/etc. it seems like I should be someone's ideal catch... but here I am....asking for pre-dating advice on A.net (again).

Thats what everyone tells me... Its all about confidence.

-Shelby
319,320,321,332,732,733,735,737,738,744,752,763,CR7,CR9,E135,E140,E145,E175,MD82
 
lincoln
Topic Author
Posts: 3133
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RE: Why Am I Still Single?

Sat Jun 06, 2009 1:07 am

Been away from the fourm (work has been kicking my ass) for the past little while, but thanks again to everyone who has replied for the advice...

Quoting Ken777 (Reply 97):
The only challenge with Italian and Latino would be their passion and fiery temper. Might be too much for an engineer/programmer.

Yeah... I love Italian food (and live within long-walking-distance of Cleveland's Little Italy), they can turn out some very attractive women, but my tolerance for the temper is nearly nonexistant. I deal with enough "excitement" the office, let alone wanting more of it in my personal life.

(I am not a "strapped to my desk" programmer... I'm a traveling, client-visiting, ladder-climbing, solder-wielding embedded systems programmer)

Quoting Ken777 (Reply 97):
So for now, simply relax. Stash money away. Buy a house when you can afford it. With falling house prices, low interest rates and the $8,000 first time buyers tax credit you'll be in pretty good shape to get a house than can handle 2 or 3 kids with ease. Lots of DIY and the married women in the neighborhood will start thinking of all their single friends, daughters, and other relatives.

Relax... uh, um... Ok, relaxed...yeah, sure, I'm relaxed.

Stash money away... done... I'm probably more conservative than most people my age; my liquid net worth (excluding my mortgage) is 60% of my gross annual income. I don't like debt  Smile

Buy a house... done (almost two years ago...just after the market tanked and before I threw away another $15k on rent)  Smile

Only problem is, I guess, I'm not sure the people in the Immediate area I live are actually the demographic I'd most like to meet.

The location of my house is a compromise between where I'd really like to live and spend much of my leasure time (Downtown Cleveland*) and where my office is (a far-East suburb of Cleveland). Nearby (about a 10 minute walk) I do have the Coventry Village neighborhood which during the school year can have a healthy number of Case Western Reserve University students bar hopping/living.

When at a bar, etc., are there any ovbious cues that a woman is alone and may be open to meeting someone vs. with someone/in a relationship/not interested.

Lincoln

*- Ok, actually, I'd "really like to live" in New York City/Manhattan. But my job is in Cleveland so the commute would be a bitch. And I couldn't afford the lifestyle to which I've become accustomed to in Manhattan.
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