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fca767
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Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 6:26 pm

Who else lives at home in their mid 20's with parents...
I live with my mum at 27 as it's so hard in england to get a house with no job and not really any friends to live with...

I had to put this forward, I know many of us brits do, and it's been in the news that over 50% of 25 year olds still live at home...But because of some narrow minded people, it's gotten on my nerves...
I mean what's it to them! Why can't families live together in the same house...it shows their ignorance to cultural values
 
captaink
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 6:30 pm

I don't see anything wrong with that all. Maybe if you decide to get married or move in with a partner you will move out, but there is no law that you have to live alone. I lived at home with my 'rents until 24, when I moved to another country, otherwise I would still be home. My other siblings did the same, until they too moved to another country where the two share and apartment.

It is cool living at home, my father had that we all (who had jobs) shared the bills. Home will always be home..

Enjoy it.
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HT
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 6:46 pm



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):
Why can't families live together in the same house...it shows their ignorance to cultural values

Copy that.
It used to be family tradition that the kids supported their parents when these got old.
Unfortunately this culture in many societies nowadays is gone, with kids rushing away from home as soon as they can.

Also I have my parents living with me (note the order of parties), since I took over responsibility of our house. We support us wherever we can, but each party still has its freedom to do what they want.
-HT
Carpe diem ! Life is too short to waste your time ! Keep in mind, that today is the first day of the rest of your life !
 
Kiwirob
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 7:29 pm



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):
Why can't families live together in the same house...it shows their ignorance to cultural values

Kids in typical Anglo Saxon households have traditionally moved away as soon as the could, its all part of growing up, gaining independance and a sence of ones self, people in the UK are not like Southern Europeans who stay at home until they get married.

I only know 1 person who stayed home until there late 20's, he would have loved to have moved out but both his parents are elderly and they relied on him too much, when he finally got out his life changed for the better.
 
iairallie
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 7:37 pm

I'll fess up I'm 31 and live in my Mother's house. I did live on my own from 17-29. I moved in with her after my brother died leaving her all alone and when I decided to go back to school for a second degree. It also didn't make sense to pay rent when with my full time job I am only home maybe 1/3 of the month and on those days I may be traveling for fun anyways. I can fully support myself though.

I think the stigma comes from adults who live with their parents because they aren't capable of supporting themselves or because they are incapable of cutting the apron strings.
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Superfly
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 7:45 pm



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):

Don't beat up on yourself.
In this economy, there are a lot of people in their 20s & 30s that's had to move back home to their parents. In the US, Canada and UK, moving out after high school is common but not so common in the rest of the world.
I moved out of my mother's house 3 days after I graduated from high school when I was 18.
I went off to college but I mainly wanted to have my own place to bring girls over.


True story.
An elderly lady across the street at 91 years old finally kicked her 62 year old son out the house.  Wow!
He was a weird guy however.
Her Granddaughter moved in instead. That lady (now 94) still drives.  scared 
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fca767
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:01 pm



Quoting KiwiRob (Reply 3):
I only know 1 person who stayed home until there late 20's, he would have loved to have moved out but both his parents are elderly and they relied on him too much, when he finally got out his life changed for the better

Just because people do that...doesn't mean I should be shamed like in the last thread...

Quoting HT (Reply 2):
Copy that.
It used to be family tradition that the kids supported their parents when these got old.
Unfortunately this culture in many societies nowadays is gone, with kids rushing away from home as soon as they can.

Also I have my parents living with me (note the order of parties), since I took over responsibility of our house. We support us wherever we can, but each party still has its freedom to do what they want.
-HT

That's true  Smile

Quoting Captaink (Reply 1):
I don't see anything wrong with that all. Maybe if you decide to get married or move in with a partner you will move out, but there is no law that you have to live alone. I lived at home with my 'rents until 24, when I moved to another country, otherwise I would still be home. My other siblings did the same, until they too moved to another country where the two share and apartment.

It is cool living at home, my father had that we all (who had jobs) shared the bills. Home will always be home..

Enjoy it.

Yes Exactly...I even Left England For Australia to do a working holiday to live on my own 3 days after xmas, spent new year on my own in sydney then did what I really needed which was to make friends.
I want to move out so much...

Quoting IAirAllie (Reply 4):
I'll fess up I'm 31 and live in my Mother's house. I did live on my own from 17-29. I moved in with her after my brother died leaving her all alone and when I decided to go back to school for a second degree. It also didn't make sense to pay rent when with my full time job I am only home maybe 1/3 of the month and on those days I may be traveling for fun anyways. I can fully support myself though.

I think the stigma comes from adults who live with their parents because they aren't capable of supporting themselves or because they are incapable of cutting the apron strings.

Sorry about your brother...My dad died and we moved to a smaller house yet actually just the same price which I couldnt understand.

Quoting Superfly (Reply 5):

Don't beat up on yourself.
In this economy, there are a lot of people in their 20s & 30s that's had to move back home to their parents. In the US, Canada and UK, moving out after high school is common but not so common in the rest of the world.
I moved out of my mother's house 3 days after I graduated from high school when I was 18.
I went off to college but I mainly wanted to have my own place to bring girls over

I won't eat myself  Smile I just get annoyed when people say I shouldn't be...it was mainly on here that I got asked...  Smile
 
Goldenshield
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:14 pm



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):
I live with my mum at 27 as it's so hard in england to get a house with no job

You should've moved to the US 3 years ago then. You just needed a pulse to get a house.  duck 
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whappeh
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:19 pm

I'm in my 20s and still at home, for the time being. I was helping my mother out after some personal troubles. I don't see anything wrong with it. Free rent, how can anyone complain about that?
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Rj111
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:35 pm

For me moving out was a purely financial decision. After Uni i lived at home for 18 months and once the i was earning enough to justify it I moved out.

Nothing wrong with it, especially at the moment. I much prefer living alone though.
 
Ken777
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:43 pm

While some people seem to want "freedom" when they get out of high school or college what they really get is a mountain of debt.

If you are able to stay - and everyone gets along - then there is nothing wrong with staying there and helping out a bit.

But I think it is also important to keep looking for a job - especially one that will let you put 75% of your pay packet in savings. I don't think young people understand that these are golden years for setting money aside so they can start an independent live later without a heavy burden of debt.
 
Springbok747
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 9:24 pm

I lived at home till I was 23. I moved out because of practical reasons as my first job was in Melbourne and after I quit that, I went back to University. Now, I go to Uni in Adelaide, parents stay 320 kms away. Its fun living alone, you get to do so many things you can't do at home plus the fact that my parents have a free place to stay when they come here.
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DocLightning
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 10:05 pm



Quoting Springbok747 (Reply 11):
I lived at home till I was 23. I moved out because of practical reasons as my first job was in Melbourne and after I quit that, I went back to University. Now, I go to Uni in Adelaide, parents stay 320 kms away. Its fun living alone, you get to do so many things you can't do at home plus the fact that my parents have a free place to stay when they come here.

Yup. I moved out at 19 to go to University 2000 miles away. I moved back home after my graduate degree for just three months before I moved out to go to medical school. OMG I couldn't get out fast enough. I've never gotten along with my parents that well...
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SpeedBirdA380
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 10:32 pm

Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):

Nice post mate.

I live at home with my parents and I am 25. Of course in our culture this is frowned,often laughed upon. It can be really tough I know. You meet a nice girl in a bar and then you tell her you live at home with mum and dad.....its pretty much goodbye isn't it! In my opinion though the generations before us had it a lot easier.

Example -

Back in around 1978 my parents brought a 3 bedroom house in our area for around £12,000.
For comparison my neighbour who also has a 3 bedroom house just put his home on the market for 375,000. Now I know of course the price and value of money changes over the years but my god!!

I earn roughly 25,000 a year pre tax and N.I. The mortgage "rule of thumb" is lenders will lend 3 times what you earn which leaves me with a mortgage availability of 75,000 or in other words, I have got more chance of flying to the moon than buying a house where I live!

If you dont have a partner or earn over £50,000 a year you are in for a hard time in England these days.

[Edited 2009-08-07 15:34:07]
 
us330
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 11:18 pm



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):
I had to put this forward, I know many of us brits do, and it's been in the news that over 50% of 25 year olds still live at home...But because of some narrow minded people, it's gotten on my nerves...
I mean what's it to them! Why can't families live together in the same house...it shows their ignorance to cultural values

From what I understand, its more common for people to do that in Europe than in the U.S. Especially in Mediterranean countries.

Quoting Superfly (Reply 5):
Don't beat up on yourself.
In this economy, there are a lot of people in their 20s & 30s that's had to move back home to their parents. In the US, Canada and UK, moving out after high school is common but not so common in the rest of the world.
I moved out of my mother's house 3 days after I graduated from high school when I was 18.
I went off to college but I mainly wanted to have my own place to bring girls over.

Exactly. In this economy, its understandable--plenty of people are doing it nowadays, especially because the under 30 age group has been particularly hard hit by the recession (For example, I saw that in Spain there's a ~35% unemployment rate for people aged 18-25).
I might actually be doing that myself to save money.
 
jamotcx
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Fri Aug 07, 2009 11:50 pm



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):
I live with my mum at 27 as it's so hard in england to get a house with no job and not really any friends to live with...

er get a job? or get some friends or both?

I'm 25 with my own 3 bed townhouse. I dont think I'd cope if I still lived at home!

Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 13):
You meet a nice girl in a bar and then you tell her you live at home with mum and dad.....its pretty much goodbye isn't it!

Exactly! Is it not at least worth renting somewhere to avoid such embarrassment?
 
gordonsmall
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 12:40 am



Quoting Jamotcx (Reply 15):
er get a job? or get some friends or both?

Exactly!

I moved out of the Parental home when I was 16 (nearly 17) and moved nearly 70 miles away (which might not seem like much, but in Scotland that puts you at the other side of the country) from the extreme West coast of Scotland to Edinburgh and have always survived since.

Since leaving I have got a degree, bought a house, gained a frozen ATPL (which I now have no intention of using in anger), started a business, sold said aforementioned business at a very healthy profit, started another, sold said aforementioned house, bought another, sold it and bought yet another and am still trundling along 'profitably'!

It's all out there if you want it ......
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cannibalz3
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 1:15 am

Just this week I moved back in with my mom after 7 nice years of freedom....unemployment sucks, but not having to pay so much rent is a great burden lifted for me. I was unhappy to have to move back, but my friends haven't given me too hard a time about it....hard times all 'round. It will be absolutely fantastic to have my own place again once I find a job, but in the meantime I'm enjoying a life of relative financial freedom. I feel like we should start a support group or something.
 
jcs17
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 1:49 am

It's fine. I lived with my parents for about six months after I graduated at age 24 because I couldn't find a job. When I found a job, I bought an apartment, and was promptly laid off (that's a whole different issue). There isn't much shame in it with this economy. I have a lot of friends who went to a "better" university than I did who are still living at home because they can't find a job in their field of study. They're doing two part-time jobs and trying to land interviews on their off days. I've met a lot of young teachers who are still living with their parents here in NoVA and DC because unlike the rest of the country, rent hasn't sunk (gotta love the federal government).
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STT757
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 1:51 am

Take advantage of the free room and board, work hard and stash some cash. Live as frugally as possible and stick everything into a savings, depending on how much you make annually you should be able to build up a nice savings from which to build a life upon.
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CXB77L
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 4:11 am

I'm 28 and still live at home with my parents. I haven't been able to afford a house with the soaring house prices, plus the fact that I have no income at all being a full time law student. I'm obviously enjoying having free board at the moment, and not having to worry about making enough money to pay the rent or mortgage, which leaves me free to concentrate on my studies.

There are times when I've longed for my own house. I wish I won the lottery so that I can buy my own house right now. Unfortunately, I just can't afford it at the moment, so I'll have to go without.
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SpeedBirdA380
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 5:12 am

Quoting Jamotcx (Reply 15):
Exactly! Is it not at least worth renting somewhere to avoid such embarrassment?

Yes it could be. I will have to look into that option.

Quoting Gordonsmall (Reply 16):

Since leaving I have got a degree

Not trying to sound like an eternal moaner but again thats something which young people including myself also have to pay for these days where the state paid for it before.

Quoting Gordonsmall (Reply 16):
Since leaving I have got a degree, bought a house, gained a frozen ATPL (which I now have no intention of using in anger), started a business, sold said aforementioned business at a very healthy profit, started another, sold said aforementioned house, bought another, sold it and bought yet another and am still trundling along 'profitably'!

Thats pretty much how I would like the next 10-15 years of my life to go. A house,business and a ATPL....if I could pull that off I would be a very happy man!

Quoting STT757 (Reply 19):
Take advantage of the free room and board, work hard and stash some cash. Live as frugally as possible and stick everything into a savings, depending on how much you make annually you should be able to build up a nice savings from which to build a life upon.

Thats some sound advice there. These next few years I am going to work damm hard and buy my own house,that is if I dont get made redundant..  

[Edited 2009-08-07 22:17:17]
 
j_hallgren
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 6:31 am

I lived seasonly with my Mom until she passed away when I was age 46 a few yrs ago...From age 22 to 45, my Mom lived on Cape Cod for 6 mths of the yr and i stayed in the FL year round (well, except for my vacation when I went up to MA to visit her and my Aunt)...

My Dad died when i was 8 and it was just the two of us so I didn't have much motivation to leave home as I was concerned about her obviously...yes, that means I've stayed single but never had much of a desire to change that.

It worked out fine for me and meant I could save enough so that I was able to "retire" at age 45 but then again, I have a very low expense life style also.
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babybus
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:14 am

As someone said, it's a cultural thing. Normally you go to college and don't move back home.

However, now with all the financial problems it's not possible to move out and get your own place. I read somewhere that most people under 35 never expect to earn enough to buy their own place. That's bad.

In Italy and north Africa guys are expected to live at home till they marry, which may not be until they are in their 30s or 40s.

Stay at home and save some money. Parents can be annoying but you should be glad they want you at home.
and with that..cabin crew, seats for landing please.
 
kiwiinoz
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:20 am

It is econimically more difficult to move out, that's for sure, but also don't underestimate the benefits to personal development, lifestyle etc by leaving home.

I think, if you have the means to move out, do it. Family is important but as most will tell you, living away from home is a very liberating and broadening experience. Well worth it for the few hundred bucks a month that it costs to do it.

My parents have a great lifestyle now and are really enjoying their years as seniors on their own. naturally, if they need care or clloser attention then one of us will probably move back in but for now, everyone is much happier leading their own lives.

And it's been so long, I think it would drive me crazy if I was living with them for more than a couple of weeks!
 
gordonsmall
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:35 am



Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 21):
Not trying to sound like an eternal moaner but again thats something which young people including myself also have to pay for these days where the state paid for it before.


Not to steal your thunder, but the state didn't pay for my degree either! The days of the state funded further education system were gone by the time I arrived on the scene, and it was all paid for out of my own pocket, though I will admit that I did get a student loan in my first year (but I stil had to pay it back).
Statistically, people who have had the most birthdays tend to live the longest.
 
waterpolodan
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 10:25 am



Quoting FCA767 (Reply 6):

All I'll say to your dillema is that it's hard to sympathize with you when an innocent question leads to a hateful, paranoid message that was completely uncalled for. PS- I'm an aetheist so that bit about god judging me fell on deaf ears, but if you're afraid of judgement perhaps you shouldn't be using such nasty terms to insult people online. Piece of legitimate advice- if you want to have a chance at landing a real job that will allow you to move out of your mom's place, you should learn to be a little less sensitive. It's just the Internet after all, what do you care what all these anonymous, distant people think of you? Your sense of happiness and self worth should be coming from within, not from whether some 12 year olds hiding behind screen names tease you about living at home.
 
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HAWK21M
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 10:39 am

Out here its very common.....Big families.....great support system.Fantastic food.
regds
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SpeedBirdA380
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 12:30 pm



Quoting Gordonsmall (Reply 25):

Not to steal your thunder, but the state didn't pay for my degree either!

Oh ok.

Well you have shown us that it can be done then with the right attitude!
 
IH8BY
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 12:51 pm

In my home town of Oxford, the average house price is about £300,000. The average flat price is just over £200,000. I won't be earning enough to buy a house in Oxford for a long time. With regard to rental, I can't realistically afford that until I have a decent - i.e. not temping - job; I can rent a small 1-bedroom flat in Oxford for £600 per calendar month if I'm lucky, more likely £700. As a temp I'll probably earn about £750 after income tax and council tax, which would leave me between £150 and £50 afterwards. which would almost all be consumed by bills (water, electricity, gas, telephone, internet, transportation). I wouldn't be able to afford food. It's a rubbish life to lead just so you can tell a girl you don't live with your parents. I'm going to wait until I find a decent job with more stable career prospects, and then I'll move out; it might take up to a year, but so be it.

I live in a rented house with another student at the moment, which I can just about afford as Durham prices, although high for the area, are low enough. That's all well and good now, as I'm a student, but the prospects for graduate jobs in County Durham are poor/non-existent.

[Edited 2009-08-08 05:56:09]
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Kiwirob
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:08 pm

When I lived in London in 96 I was earning 200 pounds a week, I shared a flat with 2 girls in Kilburn, we paid 500 pounds per month rent, it gets even better after the ex and I parted company I then moved in a kiwi, aussie, yarpie house in Hendon where I paid 20 pounds per week all inclusive, we even got free tea and coffee, I shared a room with 3 other guys, it made bringing girls home interesting but it was a great time and dirt cheap. As they always say if there is a will there is a way.
 
duke
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sat Aug 08, 2009 10:05 pm

I don't think there's anything wrong per se with living with your parents at ANY age. Just because you live together with your parents doesn't mean you are dependent on them, you are just living in the same house. I would assume that, even if you live at home after you finish your education, you are an independent grownup if:

-you fairly help pay the bills (contribute to rent/mortgage and utilities) unless you're unemployed (and if unemployed, you are looking for work)

-you don't need mommy to do everything for you (you can do your own laundry etc and are able to help out around the house)

-you largely live your own life.

I think people should understand this and not assume that everyone who lives with their parents as a grownup is a freeloader who won't hold down a job or who refuses to pay bills. People who do so are using their parents, but not all people who live with their parents are like that. Maybe they are victims of the recession. Or maybe they just like living at the address they lived in all their lives and don't want to exchange life at it for a little apartment. It's difficult your own house today. My parents bought a bungalow in 1985 for $114,000 in a decent neighborhood in Toronto. Nowadays, such a house in that neighborhood could go for, let me guess, $400,000 people buy them for land value, tear them down and build bigger houses. In order to own a home, many people move to satellite towns around Toronto and buy houses on ridiculously small lots far away from the city. They commute long distances to work and back, wasting time and producing greenhouse gasses. My generation is not as rich as the baby boomers' generation, it's not as easy to buy a house today as in the 50s-80s. So it should be all that much less surprising to people that more people are living with their parents. If you're fair to your parents in the arrangement, there's nothing to be ashamed of.
 
kiwiinoz
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 2:59 am



Quoting KiwiRob (Reply 30):
When I lived in London in 96 I was earning 200 pounds a week, I shared a flat with 2 girls in Kilburn,

Wow, that's bizarre. I was also living in a Kilburn Park flat in 96 with a couple of girls. However I think I was only earning 300 quid a month! 2 minute noodles were my special meal
 
avek00
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 3:34 am

I'm 26, pretty much moved out upon going to college and law school, and would go absolutely BONKERS if I moved back in my Mom for even a day. I love my Mom, but I've gotten too used to living by my own set of "house rules", and am in no mood to adopt hers again.
Live life to the fullest.
 
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fbgdavidson
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 4:15 am



Quoting FCA767 (Thread starter):
Who else lives at home in their mid 20's with parents...
I live with my mum at 27 as it's so hard in england to get a house with no job and not really any friends to live with...

I'm your age and can't imagine living with my parents. I went to boarding school so was used to living away from home and being a little more creative and indepedent, not relying on my parents for everything. I lived at home during school and University holidays but within a couple of months of graduation I emigrated.

Bizzarely quite a few of my friends from school, both in my year and my brother's year are still living at home in their mid 20s, sponging off them with bit jobs here and there. I do stay with my parents when I travel back to the UK and a week is usually enough!

Quoting Jamotcx (Reply 15):
er get a job? or get some friends or both?

Quite!

Quoting STT757 (Reply 19):
Take advantage of the free room and board, work hard and stash some cash. Live as frugally as possible and stick everything into a savings, depending on how much you make annually you should be able to build up a nice savings from which to build a life upon.

Exactly, I find it a bit stupid when I see my friends living with their parents complaining that things in the UK aren't as lucrative as the US (where I now live) yet they blow all their cash not enabling them to get any closer to moving away from home! My brother managed to purchase a house at 22 (in one of the most expensive real estate markets in the UK) and myself at 23 without any help from our parents. If you put your mind to it and start saving it is certainly possible.

Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 21):
Not trying to sound like an eternal moaner but again thats something which young people including myself also have to pay for these days where the state paid for it before.

And how much are the University tuition fees? £3000 a year? For £10k you could give yourself an enormous leg up over those who don't have a degree. Sure every bugger and their brother in the UK now has one but you'll hit the glass ceiling without one very quickly. The government will lend you the money for them at some ridiculously low rate in the process!
"My first job was selling doors, door to door, that's a tough job innit" - Bill Bailey
 
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HAWK21M
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 9:48 am



Quoting Duke (Reply 31):
I think people should understand this and not assume that everyone who lives with their parents as a grownup is a freeloader who won't hold down a job or who refuses to pay bills.

Very well said.Thats exactly how its out here.
regds
MEL.
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ClassicLover
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 10:38 am

I wouldn't worry about it...

I left home at 22, came back at 24, left again at 26, and came back again at 28, and left again at 29 and have yet to return  Smile

I will say that I couldn't wait to leave the last time I left... my parents and I get along well, but I enjoy my independence a lot more than living with them. I will live with them again if I have to return to Sydney (during the arrival and finding an apartment phase) so it doesn't bother me too much as long as it's short duration.

Doesn't matter how old you are - my brother was living at home until he was 25 or 26 without having moved out. Totally up to yourself  Smile
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Kiwirob
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 4:53 pm



Quoting Kiwiinoz (Reply 32):
Wow, that's bizarre. I was also living in a Kilburn Park flat in 96 with a couple of girls. However I think I was only earning 300 quid a month! 2 minute noodles were my special meal

What street, I lived in Brondesbury Villas, NW6 6AD, I have no idea why I still remember it.
 
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fca767
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Sun Aug 09, 2009 6:45 pm

Thanks guys who i've not replied too  Smile

Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 13):
I live at home with my parents and I am 25. Of course in our culture this is frowned,often laughed upon. It can be really tough I know. You meet a nice girl in a bar and then you tell her you live at home with mum and dad.....its pretty much goodbye isn't it! In my opinion though the generations before us had it a lot easier

That's the prob with some girls...luckily I only attract trustworthy ones as I am shy so that's a good thing....I have seen alot of horrible ones though...but yep its all ok now...I just need to save a deposit of say £10,000 get a mortgage, then rent out the rooms  Smile

Quoting Us330 (Reply 14):
From what I understand, its more common for people to do that in Europe than in the U.S. Especially in Mediterranean countries.

yep...USA is a great place to live I think...lots of big houses for so little money is good  Smile

Quoting Jamotcx (Reply 15):

I'm 25 with my own 3 bed townhouse. I dont think I'd cope if I still lived at home!

Well I'm slowly going mad here lol...that's why I went to Australia on a working holiday but again there wasn't much work...

Quoting KiwiRob (Reply 30):
When I lived in London in 96 I was earning 200 pounds a week, I shared a flat with 2 girls in Kilburn, we paid 500 pounds per month rent, it gets even better after the ex and I parted company I then moved in a kiwi, aussie, yarpie house in Hendon where I paid 20 pounds per week all inclusive, we even got free tea and coffee, I shared a room with 3 other guys, it made bringing girls home interesting but it was a great time and dirt cheap. As they always say if there is a will there is a way

Thanks Kiwi, sorry to have got over sensitive...it was a mixture of other things  Smile
 
eric
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 12:01 am



Quoting FCA767 (Reply 38):
That's the prob with some girls...luckily I only attract trustworthy ones as I am shy so that's a good thing....I have seen alot of horrible ones though...but yep its all ok now...I just need to save a deposit of say £10,000 get a mortgage, then rent out the rooms

With the average property costing about £150k in the UK and with a 20% equity piece (in order to get a loan these days) in a purchase you are looking at buying a house costing 1/3 of the average value of a property in the UK.

Very few brokers would be willing to lend you money on the commercial value of a property these days, thus you'd need a solid income to fund a purchase.

You'd be better moving out and gaining some independence (despite having lived in Oz for a few months).

For those drawing comparisons to other cultures. In the west one tends to move out at an early age because it works well for an individual. To say that other cultures are "better" developed" or "caring" more for the elders is pure b/s. I cannot for the life of me remember when someone last said on this site that using a burkha is good because some societies use is it.

And those who "cannot" afford to move out - get a better paid job (omg - they do exist) or leave more cheaply. Living home past the age of 20-24 is not cool, and finding excuses to do so is just sad.
n
 
SpeedBirdA380
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 12:24 am



Quoting Eric (Reply 39):
Living home past the age of 20-24 is not cool, and finding excuses to do so is just sad.

[quote=Eric,reply=39]

I have to disagree. My parents were fine with me living at home in my early 20's and its because of that I had the opportunity to visit and travel much of the world which has given me the best experiences of my life and made me a better human being.

In comparison many friends who moved out early have been slaves to a mortgage and done nothing but work since they left school. Of course I really want to move out now I am 25 but just because someone lives at home past 20 doe's not make them sad.

[Edited 2009-08-09 17:25:30]
 
eric
Posts: 324
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 12:40 am



Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 40):
I have to disagree. My parents were fine with me living at home in my early 20's and its because of that I had the opportunity to visit and travel much of the world which has given me the best experiences of my life and made me a better human being.



Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 13):
In my opinion though the generations before us had it a lot easier.

Your qoute says it all... I do not disagree with leaving home for short periods of time but when you live home with your parents on a permanent or semi-permanent basis past high school (or technical college) you are officially not very "progressive" so to say in society. To say our parents had it easier - so what? What can one do about that now. If my parents had bought a house for £1 and I had to pay £10k for that, then that is something you need to adapt to.

I am 25, I've travelled most of the world as well and I've lived permanently in three different countries. Sure, my background is cushioned but my friends who do not share the same priviledges as me have still managed to excatly the same as me. It is about assuming responsibility at an early age. To say others have it easier, whether it is friends, parents or acquaintences is just an excuse.
n
 
Wolverine
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 1:32 am

I lived with my parents until last summer. I'm 34 now. We had a big house, and in times of trouble, there was enough space to get out of each others way. My Dad sometimes said, I gotta move out, but he never forced me to do it, and so I stayed.

After my parents split up, last summer, the house was sold, and so I finally had to move. My family is spread all over Germany, now, and first it was hard, to live so far away from them. But , ok, I got used to live alone..

Sometimes I think, if there would be a way, I would like to move back home...But this home doesn't exist anymore...

But I know many people, that loughed about me, for living still at home. But for me it was ok, we are a familiy, and as long, as there is no reason, why move out?
Face your fears, live your dreams! (No Fear)
 
SpeedBirdA380
Posts: 335
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 1:37 am



Quoting Eric (Reply 41):

I am 25, I've travelled most of the world as well and I've lived permanently in three different countries. Sure, my background is cushioned but my friends who do not share the same priviledges as me have still managed to excatly the same as me.

But like you say you have a "cushioned" background. I myself have not exactly "had it tough" but there are many people out there who have. People who have to scrape every penny to survive. Because they may live at home - are they just making excuse's?

I think you make some good points but I think you are wrong to say that:

Quoting Eric (Reply 39):
Living home past the age of 20-24 is not cool, and finding excuses to do so is just sad.

 
kiwiinoz
Posts: 2000
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 1:45 am



Quoting KiwiRob (Reply 37):
What street, I lived in Brondesbury Villas, NW6 6AD, I have no idea why I still remember it.

Same street!! i don't know which number. used to walk up to the pub on the corner quite often. we had a shitty basement flat. had a back yard though
 
eric
Posts: 324
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2003 9:37 am

RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 2:01 am



Quoting SpeedBirdA380 (Reply 43):
But like you say you have a "cushioned" background. I myself have not exactly "had it tough" but there are many people out there who have. People who have to scrape every penny to survive. Because they may live at home - are they just making excuse's?

The truth is, I could have not said anything and you would have been none the wiser. Any of my friends whom I have met throughout life have still managed to make something out of themselves despite not having a great background. They've done university, they have a good job and now a good life. If you have to scrape every penny, yes it is not great, and it is not fortunate, but no one is going to create your fortune nor happiness.

So to say "things are difficult" is in the end an excuse. If things are rough, you just have to work that much harder. Life is not really a pity-train if you are an able-bodied and fully functioning member of society.
n
 
SpeedBirdA380
Posts: 335
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 2:26 am

Quoting Eric (Reply 45):
So to say "things are difficult" is in the end an excuse. If things are rough, you just have to work that much harder.

Well I respect your opinion but its my opinion that it is not always simply a case of working harder and life isn't always as simple as that.

I'm not saying this is you as you could have made your life all by yourself but in my experience the vast majority of people I know in their early 20's who now have their own house had a lot of financial help from mum and dad and/or a partner to share the costs.

So to brand everyone in their early 20's who lives at home with their parents as sad and making excuses is a bit of a generalization and a bit short sighted in my opinion.

[Edited 2009-08-09 19:27:24]
 
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Pellegrine
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 3:20 am

A lot of 20-somethings that I know (that don't have their own place) live in townhouses with friends. Sure the mortgage for the house might be $3-4000/month, but it's got 4-5-6 bedrooms, so I know a lot of them pay $600/month or so. A single apartment (efficiency or 1BR) in these neighborhoods might be $1500-2500, so that's a steal if you can tolerate roommates. Of course you don't build any equity in this process, but I know a lot of under 30s who do something like this to afford living in posh areas.
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MYT332
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RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 10:43 am



Quoting KiwiRob (Reply 3):
Kids in typical Anglo Saxon households have traditionally moved away as soon as the could, its all part of growing up, gaining independance and a sence of ones self, people in the UK are not like Southern Europeans who stay at home until they get married.

You can't talk about the UK as if it's the 1950's any more though. Huge amounts of British families are of Asain descent and have all the family living under one roof. I realise you said Anglo Saxon to start with but then you seemed to forget about it and generalise.

Quoting Jamotcx (Reply 15):
er get a job? or get some friends or both?

That kind of talk really irritates me. You always used to say it to me at the pub when I didn't have a job, along with Gordonsmall, and you made out it was the easiest thing in the world to do in nice small logical steps. Well people aren't always logical! If you're stuck in a rut then sometimes it's hard to overcome your problems and move on. Obviously I did and I moved out when I was 22 and now I have my own place in London with friends (250 miles from the family home), as you know. It doesn't make me a better person though and I wouldn't really say I'm much happier as I'm close to my family but it's just what society dictates and even though I don't care, people now take a different view of me which sickens me slightly as it just shows how money rules some peoples lives. I live on my 'own'. Well brilliant.

Quoting Jamotcx (Reply 15):
Exactly! Is it not at least worth renting somewhere to avoid such embarrassment?

That is one of the things that winds me up too with women but hey, I don't have that issue anymore. Saying that though I'm off out on a date with a girl at lunch but I'm back up north at the family house for a while. I guess it's back to her place if anything is to happen! See, there is always a solution! Big grin

Also just so you know, renting is not a bad thing nor is it always an easy thing to arrnage with credit scoring etc.
One Life, Live it.
 
idealstandard
Posts: 405
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2009 1:00 pm

RE: Living With Parent(s) Mid 20's

Mon Aug 10, 2009 11:44 am

If one does not have the means to live independently, living at home is fine. At the same time, just because you have the means to live independently does not mean you have to.

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