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CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sat Sep 05, 2009 12:39 pm



Quoting Vikkyvik (Reply 47):

If my best friend had kept that from me for a year, I'd have some serious reservations about calling him my best friend. Not because of any "bros before hos" slogan or whatever, but just because of what a best friend is supposed to be all about, irrespective of gender.

and i told him this..i asked him as to why he didnt tell me..he kept hinting at what really was going on, but i couldnt see it. I guess he didnt want to lose her trust because then he couldnt glean any info from her. Every fight me and her had, he knew about it. He kept trying to steer me away from her, but i didnt want to listen. In a way he was telling me with out really telling me what was going on.

Quoting AirframeAS (Reply 48):
The last relationship I was in.....it was a huge, HUGE nightmare for 8-9 months after the actual break-up. I finally stopped talking to her after that. And that gave me a huge sense of freedom!

how was it a nightmare? im not even talking to her anymore and i still feel like complete crap...its been a month almost too  Sad.
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9909
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sat Sep 05, 2009 7:33 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 50):
how was it a nightmare?

Oh, long, long story. To make it short, she kept on having me come over and there would be a fight. She would come over on her own (uninvited) and there would still be a fight. Do this for 8-9 months, you get the idea. It gets frustrating and very time consuming. It was very hard for me to understand what the hell it is that she wanted.... Obviously, she just wanted companionship but not as a bf/gf type... I didn't want the same she wanted.

So I told her to F-off on the 10th month and never came back....

And oh, she cheated on me with a fellow A.netter...  no 

Quoting Vikkyvik (Reply 49):

I don't get your logic but okay... whatever floats your boat.
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sat Sep 05, 2009 8:22 pm



Quoting AirframeAS (Reply 51):

Oh, long, long story. To make it short, she kept on having me come over and there would be a fight. She would come over on her own (uninvited) and there would still be a fight. Do this for 8-9 months, you get the idea. It gets frustrating and very time consuming. It was very hard for me to understand what the hell it is that she wanted.... Obviously, she just wanted companionship but not as a bf/gf type... I didn't want the same she wanted.

So I told her to F-off on the 10th month and never came back....

And oh, she cheated on me with a fellow A.netter...

ah k, yeah it was sort of the same with us as well...but she lived me. damn man, sorry to hear about it...
 
AirframeAS
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sat Sep 05, 2009 8:35 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 52):
...but she lived me.

Same with my most recent ex.

Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 52):
damn man, sorry to hear about it...

Nah, don't be. It was for the best after I found out and saw for myself on who she really was. That's when I told her to F-off....indirectly I might add....

Screwing with another A.netter didn't help any.... And I should have never introduced the two... but it happened and now life moves on, right?
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:28 am



Quoting AirframeAS (Reply 53):

Screwing with another A.netter didn't help any.... And I should have never introduced the two... but it happened and now life moves on, right?

life def moves on..doesnt wait for us, lol. You know last nite, my friend and one of her ex-friends came over. I got to really know the truth about my ex-gf...that she's a confused, immature, fake, manipulative, untrustworthy person (well at least according to that girl who came over). Apparently everyone had predicted that our relationship wouldnt have lasted very long; i.e either i would leave her or she would leave me (they were banking on me leaving first, lol). She said that my ex used me untill she had no use for me, and thats def true, as much as it hurts, its true.
 
AirframeAS
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:31 am



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 54):

Unfortunately, you won't be the last person to be "used" like that....
 
TSS
Posts: 3738
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 3:52 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 7:32 am



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 20):
Quoting TheCol (Reply 18):
Have a good time, get rich, and live life without a ball and chain. When your 30, then you should start thinking about starting a family.

This i'll agree with  Smile . But the parents are gonna come down hard on me and make me get married when i start my residency lol.

Well, there comes a time in everyone's life when they have to tell their parents "No. I'm an adult, and I don't have to do what you tell me to any more". Sometimes they respect you for this, but other times they go completely bat-sh*t and start screaming absurdities at you. But either way, sooner or later you're going to have to stand up to them.

Quoting TheCol (Reply 22):
Just explain how difficult it is to juggle a 24/7 job with a marriage, and the financial burdens as well.

Which would work great with normal, rational people... except these aren't normal, rational people, they're parents.  Wink
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
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Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 2:55 pm



Quoting AirframeAS (Reply 55):

nope, i wont...and i guess she prolly wont learn for a long time either.
 
ALexeu
Posts: 1447
Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2007 9:01 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 3:44 pm

Someone once told me that Indian gals prefer non-Indian guys...So I am wondering if that is true? Perhaps you know since you are Indian originally.
 
Fly2HMO
Posts: 7184
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:35 pm

Wise words to live by:



 Sometimes...

[Edited 2009-09-06 09:35:52]
 
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HAWK21M
Posts: 30175
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:47 pm



Quoting AlexEU (Reply 58):
Someone once told me that Indian gals prefer non-Indian guys...So I am wondering if that is true? Perhaps you know since you are Indian originally.

How can one generalize here...... Smile
regds
MEL.
 
varigb707
Posts: 1235
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:53 pm

breaking up is like pulling a band-aid out : one motion. right off!
 
vikkyvik
Posts: 12662
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2003 1:58 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:20 pm



Quoting AlexEU (Reply 58):
Someone once told me that Indian gals prefer non-Indian guys...So I am wondering if that is true? Perhaps you know since you are Indian originally.

Can't speak to that....However, I'm an Indian guy and I prefer non-Indian girls... Smile

I've actually never dated an Indian girl. Don't have any particular desire to.
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9909
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 7:17 pm



Quoting FLY2HMO (Reply 59):

 rotfl  I love that, man! LOL! Thanks for sharing!  Wink
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 7:20 pm



Quoting AlexEU (Reply 58):
Someone once told me that Indian gals prefer non-Indian guys...So I am wondering if that is true? Perhaps you know since you are Indian originally.

some do, some dont...its really an individual choice.
 
Rj111
Posts: 3007
Joined: Wed Sep 08, 2004 9:02 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Sun Sep 06, 2009 7:26 pm

No girl who dumps you on Facebook is worth it.

Go out on the town with your mates and get laid (not with your mates, with other birds). That'll get your ego/confidence back.

In the long term, just remember there will be other girls you will feel strongly for in your life, just gotta wait until the next one comes along. In your next serious relationship you may look back and wonder what you ever saw in her.
 
ALexeu
Posts: 1447
Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2007 9:01 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Mon Sep 07, 2009 9:24 am



Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 60):
How can one generalize here...... Smile

Sure no one can generalize anything...but I´ve seen many Indian girls hanging with European guys while I´ve never seen Indian guy hanging with European girl.

Quoting Vikkyvik (Reply 62):
.However, I'm an Indian guy and I prefer non-Indian girls... Smile

See  Smile
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Tue Sep 08, 2009 8:30 pm



Quoting RJ111 (Reply 65):
No girl who dumps you on Facebook is worth it.

Go out on the town with your mates and get laid (not with your mates, with other birds). That'll get your ego/confidence back.

In the long term, just remember there will be other girls you will feel strongly for in your life, just gotta wait until the next one comes along. In your next serious relationship you may look back and wonder what you ever saw in her.

you're right...the whole facebook thing was the first thing that pissed me off, secondly it was all the excuses she kept giving and it drove to my wits end by the end of it all!  Sad. Ive been listening to a lot of music lately, which has helped  Smile..and talking to friends as well  Smile.
 
AirframeAS
Posts: 9909
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2004 3:56 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Tue Sep 08, 2009 8:59 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 67):
t...the whole facebook thing was the first thing that pissed me off.....

You wanna hear something low that I have done? Well, before Facebook or MySpace ever came to fruition... I dumped my very first girlfriend via MSN Messenger, to avoid any confrontation and being slapped in the face..... This was in February of 2001.

Now that was the lowest thing I have ever done in any relationship.  duck 
 
fraspotter
Posts: 2284
Joined: Sat May 08, 2004 8:12 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Wed Sep 09, 2009 5:22 am

My advice is to go and treat yourself to something nice... Think of it as a sort of reward for making it through 2 years in a relationship and you being the stronger of the 2 people involved... I did the same thing and went on an awesome 3 day kayaking trip with my childhood best friend... By the time I got back I felt a million times better plus I strengthened the bonds of a TRUE friendship that has lasted many years longer than the one that was just ended...

Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 33):
Quoting Brons2 (Reply 30):
you should hook up with one of her friends, that always helps, and it makes her mad to boot!

ehh, a lot of her friends are nutcases too Sad

Yeah, like minded people usually have a funny way of attracting one another... weirdos usually hang out with other weirdos etc...
 
GulfStreamGirl
Posts: 198
Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:51 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Wed Sep 09, 2009 5:32 am



Quoting CaliAtenza (Thread starter):
Hey everyone! (Sorry this may be long ).

Just drink your sorrows away for a week or two and MOVE ON , my god , there's millions of women (or men lol) ,you could fall in love with in this world . Lifes too short to grieve.




 conehead 
 
scallar
Posts: 133
Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 5:35 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Wed Sep 09, 2009 9:07 am

2 years. That is quite some time. But you know what, you will be just fine. Trust me.
My (now) ex wife and I was together for 15 years. We have two daughters together and I was truly happy with my family life.
Turns out my wife wasn't as happy as I was, but decided not to tell me about it so we could work it out. Frankly, I didn't have a clue about something being wrong. She was really good at hiding it.

Her solution to the problem: cheating on me with a workmate and THEN telling me. Gee thanks!  gnasher 

Needless to say, it's been a rough time for me, but I'm back on my feet and I really enjoy my life again now. It's been 7 months since it happened and I still feel a bit humiliated, but my friends and my kids help me not to think of it much.

My advice would be, as it worked well for me.. Don't see her. Don't talk to her. Talk to your friends. Make new friends. Do stuff that you always wanted to do, like travel, buy yourself gadgets, go out and drink beer with buddies, get a tattoo, and so on. In short... do whatever you want to do. You're in control.

Good luck to ya. Cheers!
 
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HAWK21M
Posts: 30175
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Wed Sep 09, 2009 9:41 am



Quoting Scallar (Reply 71):
but I'm back on my feet and I really enjoy my life again now

Postive thining always work.
Your story is a tough one.But glad to see a nice person come out the winner in such a situation.
Cheers
regds
MEL.
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Thu Sep 10, 2009 3:08 pm

Quoting Scallar (Reply 71):
2 years. That is quite some time. But you know what, you will be just fine. Trust me.
My (now) ex wife and I was together for 15 years. We have two daughters together and I was truly happy with my family life.
Turns out my wife wasn't as happy as I was, but decided not to tell me about it so we could work it out. Frankly, I didn't have a clue about something being wrong. She was really good at hiding it.

Her solution to the problem: cheating on me with a workmate and THEN telling me. Gee thanks! gnasher

Needless to say, it's been a rough time for me, but I'm back on my feet and I really enjoy my life again now. It's been 7 months since it happened and I still feel a bit humiliated, but my friends and my kids help me not to think of it much.

My advice would be, as it worked well for me.. Don't see her. Don't talk to her. Talk to your friends. Make new friends. Do stuff that you always wanted to do, like travel, buy yourself gadgets, go out and drink beer with buddies, get a tattoo, and so on. In short... do whatever you want to do. You're in control.

wow...that must really be rough, with kids and all too  . Yeah im not seeing her, im not talking to her...im talking to friends and trying to make new ones  .

[Edited 2009-09-10 08:09:42]
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Thu Sep 10, 2009 3:12 pm



Quoting GulfStreamGirl (Reply 70):

Just drink your sorrows away for a week or two and MOVE ON , my god , there's millions of women (or men lol) ,you could fall in love with in this world . Lifes too short to grieve.

women for me  Wink. And im going on a trip next weekend with my buddies to the "French Riviera" of India, so that should be fun  Smile.
 
scallar
Posts: 133
Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 5:35 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Thu Sep 10, 2009 4:01 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 73):
wow...that must really be rough, with kids and all too.

Yeah it is. However, they help me get through it all. Having the kids to focus on is great. They have so much love to give and nothing can take that away.
The downside of it is that their mom, my ex wife, will always be in my life wether I like it or not. I can't stop talking to her completely, because our kids lifes must move on with the both of us as close to them as possible.

But like I said, things gets better over time and I'm alive and kicking again.  bouncy 

Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 73):
Yeah im not seeing her, im not talking to her...im talking to friends and trying to make new ones

That's excellent! Now you've got one here in Sweden as well.  biggrin 
All the best.
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
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RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Thu Sep 10, 2009 6:26 pm

she called me 2nite...wierd...she was like, "hello, its ..." , like i didnt know who she was or recognize her voice??? she wanted some phone numbers cause apparently her phone is messed up or whatever . I dunno, her calling just brought back a bunch of bad feelings  Sad..i wonder what the real purpose of this was???
 
vikkyvik
Posts: 12662
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2003 1:58 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Thu Sep 10, 2009 6:39 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 76):
i wonder what the real purpose of this was???

The purpose might have been as stated - that she needed some phone numbers. Or it might not have. Doesn't matter one bit.

You'd be perfectly reasonable to not pick up the phone when she calls you (if you know it's her, obviously). And if you don't know who it is, and you pick up the phone and find out it's her, you'd be perfectly justified in simply telling her immediately that you don't want to talk to her, and ending the conversation.

The longer you stay on the phone with her, the more you'll digress from the progress you've made toward getting over her.
 
GulfStreamGirl
Posts: 198
Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:51 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Thu Sep 10, 2009 7:28 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 74):
women for me . And im going on a trip next weekend with my buddies to the "French Riviera" of India, so that should be fun .

That's exactly what you need Cali ,i hope you have a good trip and have some fun.



 conehead 
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Fri Sep 11, 2009 12:22 pm



Quoting Vikkyvik (Reply 77):
The purpose might have been as stated - that she needed some phone numbers. Or it might not have. Doesn't matter one bit.

You'd be perfectly reasonable to not pick up the phone when she calls you (if you know it's her, obviously). And if you don't know who it is, and you pick up the phone and find out it's her, you'd be perfectly justified in simply telling her immediately that you don't want to talk to her, and ending the conversation.

The longer you stay on the phone with her, the more you'll digress from the progress you've made toward getting over her.

she called from a landline, only that it was later that i recognized that it was from her grandmother's house. I do still have her number in my cell, but its not under her name anymore. It did make me digress a bit from the progress that ive made from getting over her..lol, it was rich when she said.."oh, its ...", like i didnt know off the bat..bah, stupid girl !
 
deaphen
Posts: 1090
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2005 3:57 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:36 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 79):
she called from a landline, only that it was later that i recognized that it was from her grandmother's house. I do still have her number in my cell, but its not under her name anymore. It did make me digress a bit from the progress that ive made from getting over her..lol, it was rich when she said.."oh, its ...", like i didnt know off the bat..bah, stupid girl !

If you are still in India, and you are still in the mood to get over stuff, head over to Chandigarh.. spend a few days here, we can drink a couple of beers, talk aircraft, go spotting.. etc etc

Nitin
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:40 pm



Quoting Deaphen (Reply 80):

If you are still in India, and you are still in the mood to get over stuff, head over to Chandigarh.. spend a few days here, we can drink a couple of beers, talk aircraft, go spotting.. etc etc

im here for college now...i would seriously come to chandigarh...but im going to Pondicherry next week. Im def up for your offer though, i'll try and make it up there on the next holiday and i'll bring one of my friends too.
 
deaphen
Posts: 1090
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2005 3:57 am

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:44 pm



Quoting CaliAtenza (Reply 81):
m here for college now...i would seriously come to chandigarh...but im going to Pondicherry next week. Im def up for your offer though, i'll try and make it up there on the next holiday and i'll bring one of my friends too

Excellent....btw, where are you at the moment?

email me through my contact profile so that I have your contact details.

Nitin
 
CaliAtenza
Topic Author
Posts: 1686
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:43 pm

RE: Getting Over A 2 Year Relationship..how?

Fri Sep 11, 2009 2:21 pm



Quoting Deaphen (Reply 82):

you've got mail  Smile. Anyways yeah, the sooner i can get over her completely, the better. She's still at the back of my head, and im trying to get her out of my head asap!

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