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UAL747
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My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Thu Sep 01, 2011 9:06 pm

Hey guys. I'm in need of a little "anonymous" or not-so-anonymous support. My mom tried to kill herself yesterday. First she took a crap load of valium, then she tried to cut her wrists. I'm not sure what support to offer her other than to just sit there and listen. I'm afraid to make any suggestions because she's so emotionally fragile. I haven't handled her instability lately either. I try very hard just to keep myself stable (bipolar and not afraid to admit it).

It started about 2 years ago, noticed a difference in her behavior. She started slurring her words and falling all the time. I don't think she is abusing medication or alcohol, but when I looked in her medicine cabinet, it's full of about 8 or 9 prescriptions. She's in fairly good health other than the emotional thing.

Anyway, she's in an inpatient facility and I only get to see her 1 hour every other day. I think she HAS to be there, by law, for 3 days. Just not sure what's going to happen once she gets out and what I need to do. My sister is a person who says, "oh, she'll just get over it" and my grandmother basically just cries all the time when you mention anything that is wrong with anyone. Personally, I have tried this (suicide) before and have been in the same situation, so I just have been sharing my knowledge of what goes on with my mom, but not sure of anything at this point. I figured since this forum was almost anonymous it would be okay to post here, and the people who do know me here, I don't care that they know as they are great people.

Confused, scared, mad, sad....

UAL
"Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy. Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy.....Okay, fine, we'll just turn 190 and Visual Our Way
 
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Tugger
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Thu Sep 01, 2011 9:23 pm

My sympathies go out to your mother and most definitely to you as you are having to deal with the situation, a situation that has no rational answer available.

I wish I could offer more than platitudes but I do not have more to really offer having not studied the issue in not had family with this issue (suicide or sever depression). The only connection I've had was the thought of "I can just end this (end myself)" which began a thorough internal discussion of the what's and why's. Quite happily I was able to come to the answer that life just "is" and that everyday is different and can be happy and/or sad and good and bad but that it is worth always being able to wake up and see the day because no matter how hard I try, at some point, some day, I won't be able too anymore. So I take each day as it is and go from there.

My thoughts go out to you, I hope this resolves in a good way, the burden upon you is difficult no matter that you know it is not "your" burden.

Take of yourself,
Tugg
I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. - W. Shatner
There are many kinds of sentences that we think state facts about the world but that are really just expressions of our attitudes. - F. Ramsey
 
Springbok747
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Thu Sep 01, 2011 9:38 pm

Quoting UAL747 (Thread starter):

My sympathies man!

You said you noticed a change in her behaviour about 2 years ago...which may have included signs of depression and intention of suicide. 80% of people who try to commit suicide tell others of their intentions.

Quoting UAL747 (Thread starter):
She started slurring her words and falling all the time.

Maybe she had/has an underlying medical condition? Has she been checked out by the doctors?

Quoting UAL747 (Thread starter):
"oh, she'll just get over it"

That is the worst attitude anyone can have. People who are depressed and are contemplating suicide will not "just get over it". Your mom needs all the support she can get.

Quoting UAL747 (Thread starter):
Personally, I have tried this (suicide)

Sorry to hear this also. I know what it feels like..there are days where I feel so down, I've thought about what it would be like..but then realize that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem..it is simply NOT the answer.

Hope this situation resolves well. Suicide line has some good info:

http://www.suicideline.org.au/When-someone-attempts-suicide.html

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
אני תומך בישראל
 
UAL747
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Thu Sep 01, 2011 9:55 pm

Quoting Springbok747 (Reply 2):
You said you noticed a change in her behaviour about 2 years ago...which may have included signs of depression and intention of suicide. 80% of people who try to commit suicide tell others of their intentions.

She told me about a month ago she had been thinking about it. So I tried to get her to check into a hospital, but she said, well, I'm okay and not going to do anything. 2 years ago I noticed a change, but not a suicidal ideation or anything like that, then again, she might not have been telling me everthing.

Quoting Springbok747 (Reply 2):
Maybe she had/has an underlying medical condition? Has she been checked out by the doctors?

She has been checked out on an outpatient basis. Bloodwork, brainscan, MRI, stuff like that. She was being seen by a psychiatrist and was ON psychiatric meds. However, we have also suspected she might be over-medicated. But then some doctors have said her medications are fine. I'm not sure what's going on, but she had been sleeping ALL the time. And it was hard to get her awake, which is why I thought she might be over-medicated.

Quoting Springbok747 (Reply 2):
That is the worst attitude anyone can have. People who are depressed and are contemplating suicide will not "just get over it". Your mom needs all the support she can get.

My sister is concerned, but she's sort of an emotionally detached person and is one of those, pull yourself up by the bootstraps. And she's not one to be very compassionate, but I always know she cares.
"Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy. Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy.....Okay, fine, we'll just turn 190 and Visual Our Way
 
comorin
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:06 pm

UAL747, I am really sorry to hear about your Mom, who may just have a genetic predisposition for depression - it does run in families.

Since you yourself have been through that feeling of unremitting despair, you probably know better than anyone else how she feels. At some point, she probably felt that she could not take the pain of depression anymore, and unless you've been there, it is hard to explain to others.

What I would do is to be very supportive of your mother for now, and look into newer and more aggressive treatments for depression. This includes some variants on electrical and magnetic stimulation and surgery - I just don't have a link for you.

She needs to be treated with the best therapies available today and you can help her get it.

My very best wishes to your family.
 
steeler83
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:24 pm

Wow... You have my sympathy, mate!

I agree that having a "they'll get over it" attitude towards this is the worst attitude to have. If anyone has said they want to kill themselves or have actually tried to do so, they need serious attention and/or counseling.

As someone already posted above, life changes from day to day. You can have a string of good days followed by bad; you can have a mix. But life is just that; life. It goes on; nothing is permanent. I've always been told that things happen for a reason, and I have read other people's opinions and philosophies regarding the subject. Maybe some people go through hard times because God knows they're strong enough to overcome the hard times.

Maybe I'll take this time to share my own experience with depression. You all know I'm having a tough time finding a job. That coupled with my current job, more often than not, can be a major pain. Well, I had an interview for a field-related job up in New Jersey and was altimately turned down for it. Coupled with a very hard time at my current job, I really felt depressed, worthless, useless, etc. I actually thought "what if I never existed." Granted, I am one to never think of suicide. I wouldn't consider this to be even a thought of death, altho I have considered my hard time to be somewhat like a slow and painful one; like I'm dying on the inside -- anyway, then we had the hurricane come up the East Coast and cause headaches for many people, including yours truely.

Yesterday, I had an epiphany. If I were to have that job, which involved mapping power equipment (telephone poles, transformers, substations, etc) for PSE&G, I would have likely had to deal with this hurricane directly, making my life a total hell. (The job was in New Jersey, which was one of the hardest hit from Irene.) So I really am thinking that someone up there really is looking out for me, and that I have to have faith. Life is what it is for some reason...

Other than that, this might be more helpful: I actually do have some experience with a family member taking his own life. My uncle took his life back in 2003. It was after he and his girlfriend had an argument. She went out for a walk to clear her head and get some air, and before she left he told her, "if you leave, I'm hanging myself." Of course, she thought he was kidding, unfortunately he was not...

Quoting UAL747 (Thread starter):
It started about 2 years ago, noticed a difference in her behavior. She started slurring her words and falling all the time. I don't think she is abusing medication or alcohol, but when I looked in her medicine cabinet, it's full of about 8 or 9 prescriptions. She's in fairly good health other than the emotional thing.

Hmmm...

Has she had any symptoms of depression at all beginning at around 2 years ago or even before that? I'm not exactly sure what could cause slurred speech and falls. Is she stumbling as she walks? Forgive me if these questions seem inappropriate; I'm just trying to figure out what's going on and hopefully offer any assistance/support...
Do not bring stranger girt into your room. The stranger girt is dangerous, it will hurt your life.
 
AR385
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 1:18 am

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 3):
But then some doctors have said her medications are fine. I'm not sure what's going on, but she had been sleeping ALL the time. And it was hard to get her awake, which is why I thought she might be over-medicated.

If the doctors have told you that her medications are fine, then the reason she is sleeping all the time, is probably symptomatic of her depression.

Now keep in mind that there are two types of antidepressants, the SRI´s (Prozac, Paxil, Pristiq and others) These take a while to work, about 3 to 6 weeks, depending on the person. How long has your mother been taking them? This is important because certain people do not respond to SRIs. And if she´s been on them for more than 6 weeks and you´ve seen no change, she is one of those.

However there exist the other type of anti-depressants, which fell out of vogue once the SRIs came into the market, due basically to their toxicity to the liver. But sometimes it´s necessary to use them in people who do not respond to SRIs

You could try talking to her doctors about that. Now if you tell me the medications she is taking, and how long she´s been taking them I could give you more pointed advice.

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 3):
My sister is concerned, but she's sort of an emotionally detached person and is one of those, pull yourself up by the bootstraps. And she's not one to be very compassionate, but I always know she cares.

The easy answer would be to keep your sister away. However, she probably is ignorant of the problem and is not aware that your mother has a disease, Major Clinical Depression (I assume) the info. you´ve provided so far is rather vague. I suggest that before you shun her, you try to educate her, so you are not alone in this.

Quoting comorin (Reply 4):
This includes some variants on electrical and magnetic stimulation and surgery - I just don't have a link for you.

Yes, that is true. But before those methods are tried, is worth experimenting with other medications. Electro-Magnetic stimulation should be a last resort.

I myself have been diagnosed with Major Clinical Depression. In my life, so far, I´ve had three attacks. One lasted a year, the second one 8 months and the third one almost 2 years. Medication helped just enough, SRIs, but the first attack was never diagnosed as such and it was a terrible, terrible year. That´s when I became an alcoholic. Recovering alcoholic now, but depression has the potential to ruin your life.

I attempted suicide on the third. I cut the veins of my right hand and lost 2 quarts of blood. Fortunately due to fate, somebody came into my room and saved my life.

I see a sychiatrist twice a week and am currently off medication. However, I am aware it can hit anytime, but therapy helps in that it tells you how to recognize the symprtoms, the triggers, and seek help quickly.

Now, you mention this started with your mother two years ago. There must have been a trigger. Can you identify it? Can you remember anything that happened at the time that might explain your mother sliding into depression?

How old is she? Depression is also a symptom of other mental or physical diseases. Yes, many doctros have seen her, you said that, but maybe something escaped them.

About her suicide attempt, well, the amount of Valium she would have needed to take to kill herself is huge. I won´t mention the number because that would be irresponsible, but deaths by Benzodiazepine overdose are rare. That´s why they came to be, as substitutes for barbiturates, because barbiturates were extremely dangerous in that respect. About cutting her veins, that´s of course more serious, but hopefully she just scratched her skin. If she did give herself deep gashes (in the right direction) then yes, you were right in committing her.

Now, more info. would help, if you want to share it of course. You can contact me privately if you wish.

Keep in mind, however that you can´t do this alone. You can´t forget about your own disorder and you need all the help you can get.

When my father died my mother was extremely deppressed for two years and it was a terrible time, so I´ve been there. But with the right medication, the right therapy and a support group she was able to get over it. I´m sure your mother will too. Don´t loose hope.

[Edited 2011-09-01 18:36:12]
 
UAL747
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 2:17 am

Hey guys, I'm worn out from today and yesterday, so I'm going to end it here for the night. I just got back from the inpatient hospital and I really tore into my sister and now I sort of understand her a little more. It's more to do with fear and lack of education with her, but I'm still pretty pissed at her for the attitude.

Mom is still not doing well. Crying a lot. I went to her house before I went to the hospital to pick up some things and I noticed she had been working on a picture frame for a picture of all of us. I just started balling right then. Sorta too tired to get into it more tonight. I'll answer some of the above questions tomorrow. Thanks for the info and stories. It helps a lot!

UAL
"Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy. Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy.....Okay, fine, we'll just turn 190 and Visual Our Way
 
Superfly
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 3:02 am

Man I am so sorry to hear about this. My sympathies to you and your family. I wish I had some expert advice. All I can say is to be there for her. I can totally understand what its like when other relatives don't understand the seriousness of a situation like this. She is very fortunate to have a son that is very caring and understanding of the situation.
I wish you and your mother all the best.
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luckyone
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 3:37 am

I am so sorry! My complete support and empathy! My grandfather was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in the early 50's, when the medical community didn't know squat about the disorder. Their response for years was to simply medicate him into a stupor when he would have a manic episode. He was technically bipolar but only once in fifty years did he have a depressive episode, but that's a story for another day! He would basically be asleep for weeks, and then would take weeks to become functional again. Needless to say repeated bouts until the late 80's/early 90's when the medical community had a better understanding of the disorder of this type of medication did longer term damage than his disorder.

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 3):
However, we have also suspected she might be over-medicated. But then some doctors have said her medications are fine. I'm not sure what's going on, but she had been sleeping ALL the time. And it was hard to get her awake, which is why I thought she might be over-medicated.

Sadly, many patients with psychiatric illness are overmedicated simply because that makes them easier to deal with, and yes the medications do mix, potentiate, and counteract each other. What even a lot of doctors miss is that antidepressants frequently increase rates of suicide attempts because now the patients "feel absolutely great!" And are much more willing to attempt. You mentioned her being held for three days. The outcome largely depends on what the doctors of the psychiatric institution find. The individual laws vary by state, but usually there are two outcomes. They rule that she is not a danger to herself, and release her with recommendations of psychiatric help, or they rule that she is a danger to herself, in which case it is possible she will be placed into a longer term evaluation and treatment facility involuntarily.

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 7):
Hey guys, I'm worn out from today and yesterday, so I'm going to end it here for the night. I just got back from the inpatient hospital and I really tore into my sister and now I sort of understand her a little more. It's more to do with fear and lack of education with her, but I'm still pretty pissed at her for the attitude.

Mom is still not doing well. Crying a lot. I went to her house before I went to the hospital to pick up some things and I noticed she had been working on a picture frame for a picture of all of us. I just started balling right then. Sorta too tired to get into it more tonight. I'll answer some of the above questions tomorrow. Thanks for the info and stories. It helps a lot!

Don't forget yourself in the process of doing a great job being there for your mom. You're doing the smart thing by talking about it, but counselors are also incredibly helpful in situations like this if you need them. All the best, and I hope you all get the help you need.
 
Klaus
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 4:24 am

That is extremely sad, but since she is still there, there should be room for hope.

I'm sure depression can have physiological components, but by definition it manifests as an extreme spiritual draining of the soul.

Having family and possibly close personal friends expressing their care for her will sure make a difference, as necessary as professional treatment may still be at the same time. But professional help may not be enough on its own.

Just take care of yourself as well, and try to keep your own spirit up as well as you can. I'm sure it's hard to find any happiness right now, but you'll need it again. Just stay away from any tempting substitutes especially now.

I wish all the best for you and your family. Keep the light in sight!
 
dc10bhx
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 1:16 pm

UAL, I hope these words (as well as every one else's) help you out.

As Klaus said "Kepp the light in sight". You are doing the best thing for yourself and your mom right now. Just being there for her and asking for advice (even just blowing off steam) helps both you and in turn her a whole lot.

I have found that by having someone to talk to (even on this type of forum) helps so much you would hardly credit it.

All I can say is keep your chin up and look life square in the face and keep on going. Counselling for both of you would benefit (I was offered this after my Wife mis-carried and I refused it thinking I would be looked on as being weak, boy was I ever wrong about that), as this would be with a professional who, face to face, can judge how much help is required. Do not ever listen to anyone who says counselling is for wimps because they do not know how much assistance it can offer.

Keep on going and I wish you and your family all the very best.
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UAL747
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 5:18 pm

Just an update. My sister has calmed down a bit. I think what drives her is fear of the unknown and not knowing how to deal with the circumstances. She apologized for giving me the, "I don't have time for this shit, she'll get over it." But one thing it IS doing is bringing a once torn apart family together again. My cousins and aunt and uncle whom we never talk to called to express their sympathies and concern and are going to try and at least tell my mom they are wishing her the best.

I didn't sleep much last night, and I can go see my mom today due to visiting hours rules, but I have hope that she will do well. I'm not going to give her the choice to return home by herself. I'm going to insist she stay at my house for a while until things smooth out. I have 3 brand new renovated rooms for her to stay in and she will just have to deal with it! I'm not letting her go back home. I do think I'm going to go over to her house and remove her medications as well. I think that might be the best to do until we see what the Dr.'s tell her to take.

I'm not sure how she is doing. I know last night she was still very upset at the situation and was crying. She looks terrible, but I know she will start to feel better.

Yes, there was an event that happened to her aboutt 2.5 years ago that I'd rather not discuss here, that may have been the trigger for the downward spiral. Today, I'm going to try and keep myself busy, but I am elated that I heard from my estranged family. That was a blessing in itself and they were genuinely concerned. It's nice that the family is starting to rally around her. I wish she could take a long vacation but she is so busy with work she never seems to have the time to do anything for herself. I wish I could afford to just take us all, but I can't right now with what's going in my life, so I will try to make her stay at my house as much of a vacation as possible.

Thanks for the input, and I appreciate it!

UAL
"Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy. Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy.....Okay, fine, we'll just turn 190 and Visual Our Way
 
Klaus
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 5:30 pm

Thanks for the update.

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 12):
But one thing it IS doing is bringing a once torn apart family together again.

That sounds good in the situation.

All the best!
 
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Revelation
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Fri Sep 02, 2011 5:55 pm

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 12):
Today, I'm going to try and keep myself busy, but I am elated that I heard from my estranged family. That was a blessing in itself and they were genuinely concerned. It's nice that the family is starting to rally around her. I wish she could take a long vacation but she is so busy with work she never seems to have the time to do anything for herself. I wish I could afford to just take us all, but I can't right now with what's going in my life, so I will try to make her stay at my house as much of a vacation as possible.

It sounds like you are doing the best things you can do amidst a very difficult situation.

Keep up the good work, we're all pulling for you!
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Wake now, discover that you are the song that the morning brings
The heart has its seasons, its evenings and songs of its own
 
EDICHC
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sat Sep 03, 2011 4:47 am

Quoting AR385 (Reply 6):
Now keep in mind that there are two types of antidepressants,

There are more than that. My speciality in not mental health but of the major groups I am aware of there are the Sertonin Reuptake Inhibitors that you refer to, then there are the Tricyclics (e.g. Amitriptylline) and the somewhat restrictive (due to the large number of adverse dietary interactions) MonoAmine Oxidase Inhibitors (MAOI).

There is evidence to suggest that anti-depressant therapy alone, is relatively ineffectual compared to medication and psychotherapy, more so in persons of advanced age.
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mirrodie
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sat Sep 03, 2011 2:47 pm

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 12):
l. Today, I'm going to try and keep myself busy, but I am elated that I heard from my estranged family. That was a blessing in itself and they were genuinely concerned.

The above is key:

About 2 weeks ago, I went through a crisis with my father.

I knew what had to be done but he would not budge. I then enlisted my sole younger sibling, who lives with him, who could not execute what needed to be done. (This was a situation where a man would not listen to his sons, one of them, a doctor)

Finally, after an hour of cajoling, texts and phone calls (while I was in my office and juggling my own patients,) I blasted out an email to my father's 6 brothers and sisters around the world, and his 20+ nieces and nephews to call him ASAP since I was getting nowhere.

Within the next hour, he was rushed to the ER in a collective family effort.


I think you and your sister are on your way. Its a collective effort amongst you guys, however frustrating, but also you guys can't do it alone so enlist any available resource you can. And if it means new doctors, that may also be key.


I pray and wish you all the best.

mirrodie
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kaitak
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sat Sep 03, 2011 4:51 pm

Do you think it would help for your mother to talk (or indeed you) to talk anonymously and in total confidence about what it is that is causing her distress. Sometimes of course there can be lots of issues and lots of different causes and it can be hard to pinpoint them.

I volunteer for a UK based organisation that provides emotional support for people in distress, called the Samaritans. Although phoning from the US probably would not be practical, we do provide an email service, using the email address
[email protected]

You can find out more about the organisation on this page: http://www.samaritans.org/

We don't give advice or counselling; we just "listen" and try to help people share their feelings and thoughts about whatever is bothering them and to do so in a non-judgmental way.

It might not be the answer here, or indeed 100% of the answer even if it is considered, but people do find it helpful. Maybe you'd like to try it, or recommend it to your mother.
 
FlyboyOz
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sat Sep 03, 2011 10:43 pm

I'm sorry to hear about your family issue. Yeah it's a good idea to see a counselor or find a church that offers counseling or find a pastor that your mother knows. I think your mother needs to find someone who can understand her or talk to her about her situation. Maybe she should go to the church group and make friends who are christians from church. They are willing to help her and spend more time with her.

The best thing is to pray to God and ask God to give her a healing. It will take some time for her to be healed.

Here is a comic book you would like to read... i think it's a good one.
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1018/1018_01.asp
The Spirit of AustraliAN - Longreach
 
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HAWK21M
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sat Sep 03, 2011 10:50 pm

You need to be around & give maximum support.......Get medical/professional help to get your mom off any drug abuse thats causing this condition.

Take your mom out to places or to mix with her friends, get positive ppl around.

Best of luck.....Remember you have just one Dad & Mom ......Keep them happy always & for maximum time.....
I may not win often, but I damn well never lose!!! ;)
 
Klaus
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sat Sep 03, 2011 11:00 pm

Quoting FlyboyOz (Reply 18):
The best thing is to pray to God and ask God to give her a healing. It will take some time for her to be healed.

Religion is very dangerous in that respect. If she's already religious, someone from her congregation may be able to help her indeed. If she's not, this can do a lot of harm and should be avoided just like other emotional substitutions.
 
FlyboyOz
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sun Sep 04, 2011 12:59 pm

Quoting Klaus (Reply 20):
Religion is very dangerous in that respect. If she's already religious, someone from her congregation may be able to help her indeed. If she's not, this can do a lot of harm and should be avoided just like other emotional substitutions.

Yes, she is already religious. I do hope that she can go back to her church and will be able to get some help from her christian friends.
The Spirit of AustraliAN - Longreach
 
UAL747
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RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sun Sep 04, 2011 10:44 pm

My mom is religious in her own heart, not with a congregation. She's not into the "God can save you" mentality. She sort of quit the church after she found out I was gay and they all starting holding prayer groups to pray for the salvation of her son. For some reason....that pissed her off. Can't imagine why.

She's been seeing a therapist, but when I went to visit her last night, she revealed a LOT of things I did not know about her childhood. Apparently there was some abuse that I was not aware of, and there was also the verbal and mental abuse of my father when they were married. She also may be, indeed, bipolar, as I am bipolar and it usually comes from one or both parents.

Also, I have a suspicion that there may be some prescription drug abuse situations going on here as well. 2 years ago she was attacked and thrown to the ground and she had to have surgery on her knee. Since then, she has fallen quite a bit and broken a few bones and has been on and off again of pain medication. The intake nurse told me that they did indeed find opiates and benzodiazepines in her system. However, those WERE prescribed as confirmed by the pharmacy, but to what extent she was taking them, I'm not sure. I know she tried to overdose on Valium after cutting her wrists, so it's obvious that the benzos would be there, but the opiates (pain medications) she claimed she wasn't taking.

I do know that depression is the number one factor here, and it's deep-seated depression obviously. I've never seen her display any manic tendencies, and trust me, I know what bipolar mania is and looks like. I also don't know to what extent the medication abuse (if at all) was, besides the intended overdose, so I'm not going to make any assumptions, though I will retain my suspicion.

I finally coaxed my sister into going to see her, after fighting on the phone with her in two days. We are going here in about an hour, so we will see how that goes.

Thanks again for all the support. You know, it's so much easier to post this here on a.net because 1. you may judge me or my family, but at least I can't see it, and most of you wouldn't post it, and 2. while we know each other from being here so long, it is sort of anonymous even though some of you are like family to me.

Again, thanks for so much of the thoughts, prayers, and voodoo you guys are working. This is also bringing my family together more than it has been before, which is a blessing in itself.

UAL
"Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy. Bangkok Tower, United 890 Heavy.....Okay, fine, we'll just turn 190 and Visual Our Way
 
FoxTwo
Posts: 96
Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2011 10:49 pm

RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Sun Sep 04, 2011 10:55 pm

UAL 747, I am a no name brand on this site. But if I can speak from personal experience :

Tell her how much you love her - how much she means to you - and how great of a mother she has been.

Be sure to make it clear that people do care , especially her own children.

My thoughts to you on this day.
F2
 
GQfluffy
Posts: 3072
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 1:25 pm

RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Wed Sep 07, 2011 1:03 am

Quoting UAL747 (Thread starter):
Hey guys. I'm in need of a little "anonymous" or not-so-anonymous support.

Go to church.

Oh wait...
This isn't where I parked my car...
 
steeler83
Posts: 7702
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2006 2:06 pm

RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Wed Sep 07, 2011 3:54 am

Quoting UAL747 (Reply 22):
Thanks again for all the support. You know, it's so much easier to post this here on a.net because 1. you may judge me or my family, but at least I can't see it, and most of you wouldn't post it, and 2. while we know each other from being here so long, it is sort of anonymous even though some of you are like family to me.

That's why I like posting things like that on here, too. Not to mention, there's always that given the number of people who belong to this forum and the number who are "checked in" at any given moment in time, there's bound to be someone out there who is going through (or went through) the same problems you're going through as well and can be there to give you sympathy and support.

Again, I hope things all turn out for the better.
Do not bring stranger girt into your room. The stranger girt is dangerous, it will hurt your life.
 
Klaus
Posts: 21642
Joined: Wed Jul 11, 2001 7:41 am

RE: My Mother Tried To Kill Herself Yesterday...

Wed Sep 07, 2011 4:10 am

Quoting steeler83 (Reply 25):
That's why I like posting things like that on here, too. Not to mention, there's always that given the number of people who belong to this forum and the number who are "checked in" at any given moment in time, there's bound to be someone out there who is going through (or went through) the same problems you're going through as well and can be there to give you sympathy and support.

True, and it can be one of the best aspects of a community like this one. Lending support where someone is in need is important.

And while I don't feel the slightest bit bothered by someone reaching out that way (quite the opposite!), I just want to remind of the fact that this is still a public forum. Everyone is free to give up as much of their privacy as they choose (and different people have always had wildly varying needs for privacy or exposure), but for all the positive and maybe even important feedback which may result, going public this way cannot really be undone after the fact.

Yes, I do think that there can be times when privacy starts losing its importance relative to even more important matters, and matters of life, death and despair can obviously qualify.

Nobody should hold back just for fear of feeling unwelcome here when the going gets tough – no question about it. Just for one's own sake one should consider how much of a priority one's own privacy is in context.

All the best to Phil and his family, and to anyone reading this. You are absolutely welcome!

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