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duke
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Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 1:32 pm

How well do you think your given name has served you in your life? Did you encounter any difficulties with it worth mentioning at any point or has it worked well for you. If there have been any issues with your name, do you find any grounds to resent or criticize your parents' decision to give it to you?

I don't use the name that was given to me. I have been going by "Ned" since I was 23 (am 36 now) and I plan to legally change it to that. I would have done so already, but as I am between two countries (Canada, of which I am a citizen, and the Czech Republic, of which I am not), there would be certain bureaucratic issues associated with it. I may do so in the coming year or two during a longer stay in Canada and then would do the same thing on returning to the Czech Republic.

I was born in Serbia and was given the name "Nebojsa" (pronounced NE-boy-sha, stress on the first syllable), but grew up in Canada, where I found this name to be utterly useless. Nobody could pronounce it quite right, I was teased about it at school, I was simply the odd man out. Even now, when Czech people see it on my official documents in government offices etc, they tend to think it's my surname because it seems like one to them. In short, my legal name has caused me quite a bit of grief. I would not, however, reproach my parents for giving it to me; there are things I seriously resent my parents for, but this is not one of them. The reason is quite simple: in the place where I was born, it's a perfectly normal name and at the time of my birth there were no specific plans to move to Canada. So in my case, it was simply a case of bad luck rather than poor judgment on my parents' part.
 
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Kiwirob
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 3:15 pm

I honestly don't see your point, my given name is Robert, everyone has called me Rob from day one, except my mum when she's mad at me calls me Robert. Your name is Nebojsa, everyone calls you Ned, you are known as Ned, so why go through the trouble of changing it.

If your name was something stupid like Dick or Odd (common male name in Norway) I could see your point.
 
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autothrust
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 3:31 pm

Hi Ned,

as you i have a kind of special name which did not serve me well(school was terrible) and still not does.

My name is Amadeo ...NO not Amadeus or Amedeo(like A380 leasing company) or Wolfgang nor is it my family name like most ppl in italy think.

Hell it's even unspellable in english and there is not really a short form. Also this name is nowhere native with the exception of latin.

So i can understand your decision to change your name very well.

But i would never legally change it, as my passed away parents choose it.


At least my name while not specially tied to a language is not a fantasy name todays (poor) kids get.

I would like to slap parents which give their children sh**ty, stupid sounding, fantasy names.

I also hate those fantasy names which totally do not match with the family name.

Ned sounds nice and i think it will serve you very well.
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duke
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 3:45 pm

Quoting kiwirob (Reply 1):
I honestly don't see your point, my given name is Robert, everyone has called me Rob from day one, except my mum when she's mad at me calls me Robert. Your name is Nebojsa, everyone calls you Ned, you are known as Ned, so why go through the trouble of changing it.

That can't be compared. There's nothing weird or hard to pronounce about Robert and Rob is simply a common short form, which many names have. Probably most Roberts wouldn't have a problem with someone using the full form of their name at some point; conversely, calling a Robert Rob or Bob in everyday speech is kind of natural and almost to be expected. But Nebojsa and Ned are two completely different names. I never even liked the former and do not identify with it. I think of myself as a Ned and not a Nebojsa, and associate Nebojsa with unpleasant memories, so there are more reasons for me wanting to chuck it. Also, legally changing my name means I would nevermore be in the situation where I would be addressed by someone by it and have to explain that I don't go by it. I want people to see me as Ned and Ned only, and it would just simplify life.

Quoting autothrust (Reply 2):
At least my name while not specially tied to a language is not a fantasy name todays (poor) kids get.

I would like to slap parents which give their children sh**ty, stupid sounding, fantasy names.


Agreed.
 
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mbmbos
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 4:25 pm

I like my name. Unfortunately so do 6000+ other American males. I have a very common name and it has led to many problems. I have had to fight to get my G.P.A. restored in high school and college because others with my name didn't do so well and records got messed up. I've had my credit downgraded because of my common name. I have been put on a skip beat service (people who buy lots of expensive stuff, then skip town). I have been pursued by lawyers demanding alimony and patrimony payments. I was pursued by law enforcement because a doctor from Michigan with my name had absconded with funds and with patient records. And for the first few years after 9/11, I was subjected to intensive searches at airports including being sequestered by Interpol at Schiphol. All because my common name and records associated with it got scrambled.

I don't know if this happens with other people who have common names or if I've just had bad luck.
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sccutler
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 5:56 pm

My entire name is made up of surnames, with a "Jr." tagged on to the end. The first name is identical in pronunciation (but not in spelling) to that of a very prominent (household name prominent) local business family, so no who uses my first name ever spells it correctly. Even the Social Security Administration has it wrong, and in 56 years, I've never been able to get them to correct it.

For those who knew my father, the association is nothing but good - I've not yet met the person who knew him and did not like and respect him. One can do worse in life (he passed at 93 years of age a few years back).

Since I'm a "Jr.," though, I have a nick-name, and that is what I use most all the time, and it has served me well - at least, up to the time a cable TV network adopted the same name. It works well for my profession, it's memorable and I'm happy with it.
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IADCA
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 6:12 pm

Quoting mbmbos (Reply 4):
I don't know if this happens with other people who have common names or if I've just had bad luck.

Not to quite the same degree as you, but yes. To me, it sounds like there are one or two people with your name who do a whole lot of bad things. Same for me. In my case, that stopped pretty abruptly after I took a couple steps. The two most effective included using first middle last for EVERYTHING and getting a redress number for the travel side - it really does work.

Edit: To address the OP's question, I believe it hasn't served me well. I don't blame my parents for much, but my astoundingly common name - which is on the John Smith level of generic - has led to a lot of annoyance.

[Edited 2015-10-28 11:54:25]
 
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zckls04
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 6:19 pm

Quoting kiwirob (Reply 1):
I honestly don't see your point, my given name is Robert, everyone has called me Rob from day one, except my mum when she's mad at me calls me Robert.

It's an interesting thought to consider. I have the relatively rare distinction of having changed both my names since birth- though by aesthetic choice rather than because the names weren't serving me well. It's quite surprising how easy it is to let go of a name and have it just become second nature. Our identity isn't as rooted in it as we sometimes think.
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mbmbos
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 6:22 pm

Quoting IADCA (Reply 6):
The two most effective included using first middle last for EVERYTHING and getting a redress number for the travel side - it really does work.

Precisely the steps I have taken and it has made a big difference.
"If I don't manage to fly, someone else will. The spirit wants only for there to be flying. As for who happens to do it, in that he has only a passing interest."
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Kiwirob
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 6:37 pm

Quoting duke (Reply 3):
That can't be compared. There's nothing weird or hard to pronounce about Robert and Rob is simply a common short form, which many names have. Probably most Roberts wouldn't have a problem with someone using the full form of their name at some point; conversely, calling a Robert Rob or Bob in everyday speech is kind of natural and almost to be expected. But Nebojsa and Ned are two completely different names.

Ok then lets say Richard to Dick or Jim from James or Anthony to Tony or my aunt who was born Margaret but was always called Milly.
 
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 6:55 pm

First name: very generic, common, boring: neither a plus or a minus
Last name: ethnically Eastern European, always need to spell it out for others: a mild negative

Why not change it? I would have no problems doing so if I had a good enough alternative, but haven't really come up with one.

One of my relatives first names is Edward so he went by Eddie or Ed as a kid but as an adult he decided he liked Ted better. No real dramas changing it. He said he did it because there were too many other Eds at his workplace. Personally I think he did it for aesthetics.

Maybe I'm a grumpy old man, but I don't like the trend over the last few decades of making up new first names. I don't think it's very distinguished. It takes the practice of using a child's name to honor respected family members or others down to the level of naming a new pet. I don't think it serves the children very well.
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Aeroflot777
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 7:26 pm

Quoting duke (Thread starter):
So in my case, it was simply a case of bad luck rather than poor judgment on my parents' part.

Not sure I agree with you, but respect your want to change your name, it's your life afterall. I have a very unusual name that is unheard of outside of Russia/Ukraine/Belarus. The popularity of the name has since been growing so maybe with time I'll run into it more, for now it's only in isolated instances I meet a man with my same name. I also grew up, on and off, in Scandinavia and the USA. No one on this planet to this day can pronounce my name correctly until we have a conversation and mini-tutoring session about it. Many people I know with my name have chosen an English equivalent and stuck with it, stemming mostly from their early years when they didn't want to be teased by kids while growing up.

I never had this issue, I was super proud of my name from an early age and realized it made me different and I stand out in the crowd. People are always interested to ask about my background and the origin of the name and I happily answer when that comes up. Signing up for an appointment in person or via phone, making a dinner reservation, being called in the waiting room, calling any customer service line - not a single time has anyone said it correctly. But I'm used to it and small talk ensues.

Not to mention that in Russian, many male names end in an "a", which in English would usually indicate a female form, so that comes up a lot too.

In any case, I never changed it and never resorted to finding an English equivalent. Everyone who knows me or wants to get to know me spends the 5 seconds to get it right and it never comes up again.

Quoting duke (Thread starter):
I was born in Serbia and was given the name "Nebojsa"

What an awesome name. I would never go about change that, it's who you are.

I have a few friends in the Bay Area who are Serbian and all carry the name Nemanja. They have all kept it as well and I love the way it sounds.
 
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Boeing717200
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 7:43 pm

Quoting sccutler (Reply 5):
Even the Social Security Administration has it wrong, and in 56 years, I've never been able to get them to correct it.

Epic.



My middle name is horrid, but I go by a nickname that doesn't go with it so its never been an issue.
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vikkyvik
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 7:47 pm

I generally go by Vik, and have since I can remember.

I don't really have any issues with it or my full first name. I do have to spell my first and last name quite frequently, but whatever, not exactly a big issue in life.

The funny thing is that a decent number of people have assumed my name is Victor, and have proceeded to call me that. I don't usually correct them, because it doesn't really bother me.

Of course, most people spell it "Vic" or "Vick", but again, not a big deal.

The kinda funny thing was when my name popped up as a topic in a Friends episode.
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 9:04 pm

Mine has worked out well for me. The biggest challenge I have encountered is with my family growing up. I'm Patrick, but my brother is Matthew. We both go by the nicknames Matt and Pat. When one of us was in trouble and heard a yell "MATT!" it was often confused with the other. But you know, I was an angel, so it was always Matt in trouble  .
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SmithAir747
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 9:16 pm

I actually have two complete names:

I was born Hugh Dermott O'Connor (my biological parents, from Ireland, were O'Connors, and were in the USA on academic sabbatical). I was given up for adoption after birth in Indiana, was a ward of the state (and in foster care for the first 3 years), then placed with my eventual adoptive family. Since I was born in Indiana to Irish native parents who were here temporarily on academic sabbatical, that makes my US citizenship a birthright citizenship.

When my new, adoptive parents (the Smiths) took me home to Fort Wayne in 1978 (at almost age 3), they decided to rename me, and had me baptized (Catholic) as Francis Joel Smith (after St. Francis of Assisi). They called me Francis (and so did everyone else), although Hugh Dermott O'Connor remained my legal name for years while my adoption was tied up in red tape in Indiana until age 15 (1990). My craniofacial surgeons and other doctors who cared for me in Indianapolis and St. Louis still used Hugh O'Connor as my name on all the medical records during that time. Everyone else (family, teachers, friends, church, etc) called me Francis Smith in the meantime. So I went around with two full names (Irish and American names) whilst my adoption attempt ground through the legal channels in Indiana for over a decade.

Finally my adoption was legalized in 1990 when I was 15; since then my legal name has been Francis Smith. I believe my birth certificate now reflects my current legal name and adoptive parents, instead of the original (native) name and biological parents. That might create issues when trying to prove my Irish parentage should I pursue Irish/EU citizenship (as part of a dual US/EU citizenship) or want to live/work in the UK/Europe. It might have been helpful when I was studying in the UK from 2004-2007, as it might have saved me thousands of dollars in university tuition and fees if I were considered an EU citizen, instead of paying full fees as an American as I ended up doing (I have huge student loans from that).

Francis should be a straightforward common name, but during my lifetime, I have actually been misidentified by many others as female (as they confuse my real name Francis, with the feminine spelling "Frances"). I have often seen my name misspelled as "Frances" on doctors' reports, teachers' reports, my incoming mail, etc. I have even seen female titles "Mrs" or "Ms" in front of my name on mail and other documents! It continues to this day--both the wrong spelling and wrong titles/prefixes. Now that I have a PhD, hopefully the "Dr." title should eliminate the wrong title/prefix issue.

SmithAir747

[Edited 2015-10-28 14:23:15]

[Edited 2015-10-28 14:25:04]
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flyingturtle
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Oct 28, 2015 9:45 pm

The trouble with my name is that people call me Daniel.


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QFA380
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 2:04 am

I don't particularly like my name, in Australia I think there are very very few 3 syllable male names that are not colloquially shortened including mine (Daniel, Samuel, Benjamin, Jonathan, Anthony, Oliver, William, Alexander). To put it mildly, if I went around introducing myself as my full name I would be universally be derided as a posh wanker. This phenomenon exists in other countries however not to the extent here. I have never met a native Australia with the same name as me who uses the full version, there were 6 of us in my class so it isn't uncommon. However French, Germans, English people seem to usually use the full version, my Spanish grandmother uses the full version when talking to me.

With the nasal Australian accent, Dan/Sam/Ben/John while very different often sound the same.

My last is simple yet very uncommon, my grandfather who moved over from England and his descendants are to the best of my knowledge the only ones in the country with out last name.

It is spelt one letter variation to a popular brand name that is pronounced differently. It is most likely from the same origin but was Anglicised when my ancestors left France for England. People hear me say it, they write it incorrectly and then pronounce it the same as the car.

Not to mention the first syllable of my last name rhymes with the shortened version of my first name. It sort of mashes into one weird word

So while my name is not horrific, it has some bad qualities.

Quoting jetblueguy22 (Reply 14):
I'm Patrick

If I could I'd change my first name to this. Occasionally I use it when ordering coffee or other inconsequential settings as it easier to hear.
 
DLFREEBIRD
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 2:58 am

i didn't even know my name until roll call in kindergarten. My mom always abbreviated our names to modernize them.
something to do with our catholic priest talking my mom into giving us all formal names.

I'm Abigail though everyone since birth has called me Gail. I'm just glad my parents didn't name me Ashley, although when i was little i hated my name thinking it was old fashioned, i wanted to be called Ashley. Now i'm fine with my name.

funny story, in kindergarten my son Sean came home crying and told me he hated me for giving him a black name.
He a super blonde blue eye kid. You could of knocked me over with a feather.


so, i told him we could call him by his middle name, Scott, but no he wanted to be called Scottie. The type of work he does, he's often quoted in news articles and I've noticed that he's back to using his first name professionally. but, it's too late. he will always be Scottie to me. LOL
 
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WarRI1
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 3:21 am

I never have had a reason to not like my first or last name, yet I never wanted my son or my grandsons named after me. I never like the Little and Big titles that is so often used in my family.
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Viscount724
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 3:38 am

It's often confusing when someone has a first name that can also be a last name, when their last name can also be a first name (e.g. Lawrence James). Since the family name often comes first in various lists, it's sometimes not clear which is the first name and which is the family name. Sometimes, even the first, middle and last names can be shuffled and still sound like normal names. Example, JFK's assassin, Lee Harvey Oswald.
 
YVRLTN
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 3:53 am

I hate my name, though Im more accepting of it now, it seems more common over here. I have always been Vernon though my friends and colleagues have always shortened it to Vern and Im OK with that. I will maybe sign off as Vern casually to someone I know well, but I always introduce myself as Vernon, but more often than not people automatically abbreviate it to Vern anyway. My head office always formally write of me as Vern and with my surname it just doesnt look or sound right somehow... the plus side is it is unique so I have never been confused with someone else.

Quoting Viscount724 (Reply 20):
Sometimes, even the first, middle and last names can be shuffled and still sound like normal names. Example, JFK's assassin, Lee Harvey Oswald.

I have this too... my middle name is rarely used, but people, usually non native English speakers, often assume my surname is my first name , probably as they think its the more likely of the weird names to be my first one.
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vikkyvik
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 5:18 am

Quoting Viscount724 (Reply 20):

And there are some countries/cultures where the last name comes first. Hungary, I think, is one of them.
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mad99
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 6:53 am

Living here in Spain makes things a bit more difficult.

First my given names are difficult for a Spanish native to pronounce and second, here both surnames are used. Your first surname comes from your father and the second from your mother so even if the parents are not married you get both.

My surnames are similar and unpronounceable to the average punter here but they do try to chock through it.

One of my kids has a name common in both Spanish and English, pronounced differently, and the other not common here but pronounceable.

My given names come from religion and or past family members same for the kids.

My kids go to school with loads of immigrants, mostly Latin Americans and Eastern Europeans and the LatAm's take the cake when it comes to names. Miley, Brittany or any current shitty pop star that they can't pronounce. Or Rodger spelt Roger or Jesus (spanish pronounced hey - sus) spelt yesus to try and sound like its pronounced in English. One kid is named Ethan but you'd never guess it because they can't pronounce it.

One Spanish girl is named Luna (moon). Who names a kid Moon
 
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Kiwirob
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 8:29 am

Quoting QFA380 (Reply 17):
in Australia I think there are very very few 3 syllable male names that are not colloquially shortened including mine (Daniel, Samuel, Benjamin, Jonathan, Anthony, Oliver, William, Alexander).

It's the same in NZ, but not in Norway. My sons are Nicholas Campbell and Christopher James, in Norway we had to stop the school calling the kids by both names which is very common here. I have always wanted to shorten them to Nick and Chris, but my wife and the boy's won't allow it.

Most of my cousin's name are shortened

Samual - Sam
Abigal - Abi
Elissa - Lissi
Kimberly - Kim
Campbell - Cam
Rebecca - Becs
Katherine - Kathy
Anne Marie - Annie
Amanda - Mandy
Timothey - Tim
Matthew - Matt
Anthony - Ant
Florence - Flo
Christine - Chris or Chrissy
David - Dave
 
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falstaff
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 11:30 am

Quoting kiwirob (Reply 24):
Anthony - Ant

I never heard that one before. The people I have known with the name Anthony go by Tony.

My name is Bryan and I never had any real trouble with it. It is more commonly spelled with an "i" than a "y" so when I was a kid I never found a nifty novelty bike license plate or pencil with my name on it.

Bryan is a common name, although not as common as it once was. When I was in school there were always multiple Bryans or Brians in class. I teach high school and I have not had either in class in years. Once when I was a university student I was in a class with twenty-one students and there were seven Bryans or Brians in the class.
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Revelation
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 12:10 pm

Quoting QFA380 (Reply 17):
if I went around introducing myself as my full name I would be universally be derided as a posh wanker.

Yes, that does seem to happen.

One of my cousins was called Kim as a child but now works in a posh environment and goes by Kimberly. Her kids find it very strange that a few of us relatives just call her Kim.
Wake up to find out that you are the eyes of the world
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Wake now, discover that you are the song that the morning brings
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MrHMSH
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 2:41 pm

My parents disagreed over my name, my father wanted to name me after his line, his father and grandfather had the same name. My mother hated the idea and the name, so they reached a compromise that my father's name would be my actual name, but they'd call me by my middle name.

It does cause some confusion, the only real drawback, but I do like my name.
 
nws2002
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 3:28 pm

My first name is really, really Greek and no one can ever pronounce or spell it correctly. So, since I started school I've always used one of my middle names. It was easier to say and spell for most people.

Now at work though it is bit annoying. Most people know me by my middle name but my email is fname.lname. I had to beg and plead with IT to add an alias of mname.lname and add my middle name to the directory as well.
 
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 3:31 pm

My last name is Boulet. Growing up people would call me "Bullet" or Bootleg. Every time my band director would address me or tell me to play something shed always say "Bullet! Play measures so and so!" in her deep east Texas accent. She always me me laugh.

My brothers nickname (kinda as a result) was Bobby Boucher. Which got passed on to me as we had the same coach in middle school. Fast forward about 7 years and my supervisor gave it to me because she said my name reminded her of the waterboy. Good times!
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Tugger
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Oct 29, 2015 7:51 pm

My name is very neutral, the first is a good strong but very normal name (if you look it up in the dictionary I am either a Saint or a blemish   ) and my last is a meaningless name (in english) that is easy enough to spell and pronounce. Over all I am quite happy with my name. Could I have had a "cooler" first name? Sure, as a kid I sometimes thought I'd like a different name but not anymore.

Quoting nws2002 (Reply 28):
Now at work though it is bit annoying. Most people know me by my middle name but my email is fname.lname. I had to beg and plead with IT to add an alias of mname.lname and add my middle name to the directory as well.

I don't get this sometimes. I understand the need to standardize things and at big companies it is even more important. But assigning aliases is not that hard and they should up front realize the need to have some levels of flexibility. My mother uses her middle name and quite a lot of business have heart burn about it.

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WildcatYXU
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sat Oct 31, 2015 1:17 am

Quoting duke (Thread starter):

As I see it Ned, the only problem with your name is that many would mispronounce it around here. I have the same problem here and I often have to spell my name. But when I start Tango India Bravo...everybody's mood suddenly improves.
Otherwise, as far as your original name is concerned, there is nothing wrong with being called Fearless.

Our mistake was not to change Mrs. Wildcat's last name to match mine. Hers is a feminine form that's so often used in Slavic countries (my last name is Bajzat, hers is Bajzatova). We're asked quite often why are our last names different.
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diverted
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sat Oct 31, 2015 1:23 am

the "meaning" of my first name(an Anglicized latin name) is something. My last name means "son of something" (Not like Anders Anderson for example, but same basic idea)

Sorry, rather hard to describe that without giving out my full name, but hopefully you get the point.

Also, strangely there was apparently no intent from my parents to give me such an oxymoron of a name.. they had no clue until I brought it up one day.
 
bunumuring
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sat Oct 31, 2015 7:46 am

My surname always is a conversation starter. I am directly descended from one of the most famous and arguably important men in history.
I'm proud of that, but do not ever seek attention because of it. Some of my work colleagues and mates however, tease me and say that I am exactly like the way he has been depicted in historical records, in a positive way!
And apparently, I look like him in profile ... lol ... when you look at busts and depictions of him.
I would really love to go back in time and meet him... give him a hug, and tell him how proud I am of him.

Cheers,
Bunumuring.

[Edited 2015-10-31 00:54:20]

[Edited 2015-10-31 01:06:12]
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Pellegrine
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sat Oct 31, 2015 10:48 am

I have a very western first name, but a very unusual European last name.

I'm in favor of people changing their names because they want to, but not because of societal pressure or what is relevant in current society. To me that is very disingenuous and defeatist. I have a friend now with an African first name and a European middle name and she wants to go by the European name and change it officially. I respect what people want to do with themselves, but I don't understand why so many people want to assimilate to Western cultures.

I'm actually adding middle names to my name in honor of my deceased uncle and mother. But I will always keep my first and last name.
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VapourTrails
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sun Nov 01, 2015 9:06 am

When I was growing up, didn't like my first names, and wanted to change them by deed poll after I turned 18, much to the horror of my mother, who had the final say in the selection of my names.

These days I really like them, and would never consider it. Never had any issues, so yes, served me well. I've even had people credit my parents with the name selection of me and my siblings, so that has all worked out well!    Two of us get misspellings, and I get mispronounciation, but minor detail really.

The fact that I have never changed any of my name, makes it easier when filling out forms and applying for passport etc.

Always said, had I had children, that I would have given them three first names and make the spelling of one or two a bit unusual (but nothing ridiculous or bogan), in this day and age of identity fraud. They hopefully then would not get (as easily) mistaken for other similar names and three first names is easier for them to be be singled out as that is their name. That was the theory anyway, I think it is a good one!

I can never understand why people put their full name on say, their facebook profile, it is asking for trouble IMHO. Full names should only be used for formal occasions and filling out legal documentation and things like that.

People who were not given a second name, only a first name and surname, I think that is unfair! Particularly if it is open to confusion with other people's similar name.
 
bunumuring
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sun Nov 01, 2015 12:37 pm

Quoting VapourTrails (Reply 35):
People who were not given a second name, only a first name and surname, I think that is unfair! Particularly if it is open to confusion with other people's similar name.

I agree entirely!
I have a good friend who enrolled in a four year uni degree and discovered that there was another girl in the course with an identical name - first, middle and surname - all spelled the same as hers. It caused four years of confusion around exam time and the learning of results. Every time results came out, the two of them would have to check with the faculty as to who's results were who's. They did become good and enduring friends however!
Cheers,
Bunumuring.
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andz
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sun Nov 01, 2015 4:14 pm

All these comments about confusion with other people with the same names make the national identity number system make a bit more sense..... that said, I am one of only 4 people in this country with my surname and the only one in my multinational company's address book.
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LSZH34
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Nov 04, 2015 12:21 pm

I can totally relate to some guys. My name doesn't serve me well up to now. Although I'm swiss, my name is much more common in the orient. I get some weird looks here and there and felt prejudice. It's either my name or my skin colour (I'm mixed race). It sounds stupid but I have a hard time meeting new people because of my name. Especially nowadays with conflict between the west and Islam. To get this out of the way - I'm atheist.
 
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einsteinboricua
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Wed Nov 04, 2015 1:13 pm

Two things I don't like about my name:
1. The dynasty feel to it. My dad and I have the same name and last name so the only way to distinguish who's who is by our second last name (Hispanics have two last names, with the woman keeping her maiden name after marriage and bestowing it to the children after the paternal last name). My mom is eager for me to have a son so he can be einsteinboricua the third (as if I really wanted to keep the name going). At any rate, only a daughter would have the name and only as a middle name...which leads me to:
2. The gender of the name. I'm not worried in the states because the name is far more common than in Puerto Rico so folks here know how to pronounce it. Back home, however, I'm often called by the female version of the name thanks to a beauty queen with the female variant of my name. Needless to say I was mocked in school for the name.

I don't think it's that it's served me well or badly, but I could have been a more unique individual with a name that wasn't so complicated and prone to mispronunciation. Mother said she wanted to call me Jean ...I wasn't onboard with it when she first told me, but later on I think it could have suited me better. Of course, by now, it's too late to do much. I'm not gonna change my name and go through legal hurdles to change it, but rest assured, my children (if any) will not have my name as their first name.
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DLFREEBIRD
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Nov 05, 2015 2:31 am

Quoting andz (Reply 37):
Quoting andz (Reply 37):
Every time results came out, the two of them would have to check with the faculty as to who's results were who's.

Interesting, It's been years since i attended a university. Back then we were assigned student body id cards and our test scores and final grades were posted using that number. Now the kids just have to have access to a computer to log on
and see what they got.

now kids are pretty much tracked where ever they go. As a parent you can log in, and see if they were late to school, what they got on their pop quiz, and if they skipped a class.

they are totally busted. Is't technology great.
 
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TheFlyingDisk
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Nov 05, 2015 7:21 am

My name makes it easy for me to travel while Muslim to Western countries. My first name is an abbreviation of Muhammad/Mohamed/Mohammad (kind of like how Chas. is the abbreviation for Charles), which is unique only to Malaysians while my middle & last names are Malay names that is in no way Arabic sounding. And while my passport does have the "bin" suffix in it I generally don't put it on my booking and it's accepted as such. So far I've not been unduly hassled on my trips (knock on wood) although I'm pretty sure my appearance does help - I don't have that stereotypical Arab/Muslim look.

However I do find it funny seeing how Westerners try to pronounce my name because in English it's not pronounced as it is spelled, so to spare them the trouble I'd tell them to use my nickname which is more easier to pronounce,
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rfields5421
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Thu Nov 05, 2015 5:52 pm

My first name and its shortened common usage is only given to a few dozen boys a year in the US.

It has made me memorable, because I'm the only person with that name most folks ever meet.

It was also a bad name to have in junior high. Easy to make fun of.

I've made my children and grandchildren promise to never give my first name to their boy(s). If they want to carry a tradition use my middle name which was my maternal grandfathers name, my middle name, my son's middle name and the middle name of one of my grandsons.

My mothers name is carried by two of my granddaughters and my sisters oldest granddaughter. The three of them find sharing her name a special bond.
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IADCA
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Fri Nov 06, 2015 12:48 am

Quoting einsteinboricua (Reply 39):
1. The dynasty feel to it. My dad and I have the same name and last name so the only way to distinguish who's who is by our second last name (Hispanics have two last names, with the woman keeping her maiden name after marriage and bestowing it to the children after the paternal last name). My mom is eager for me to have a son so he can be einsteinboricua the third (as if I really wanted to keep the name going). At any rate, only a daughter would have the name and only as a middle name...which leads me to:

Just a word of caution about the use of a family given name as a middle name: if the child doesn't like its given name, then it can't use its middle name to cover. My middle name is my father's given name, and given that I dislike my first name I would have preferred to go by something else. It's still probably applicable if it's the feminine of your name. That is, Gabriel's daughter is not likely to go by Gabriela or Gabrielle. You're a smart dude, so I'm sure you'll find a good solution, but as someone who was the child that the grandparent wanted to name DCABWI the third, getting named IADCA wasn't much better, especially when IA is a generic name, DCA isn't, and my last name is extremely generic.

Quoting einsteinboricua (Reply 39):
Mother said she wanted to call me Jean ...I wasn't onboard with it when she first told me, but later on I think it could have suited me better.

If you were concerned about getting teased about having a female name, that's almost certainly even worse.

[Edited 2015-11-05 16:55:57]
 
DLFREEBIRD
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Fri Nov 06, 2015 12:58 am

oh please, i had to endure Gail the whale with the big fat tail, thought i was very tiny in grade school.
also, the boys used to call out Gale Warnings, when i walked into a room.

and yes, my name depending on how you spelled it a male name. I have been asked before, if i was a male. i would just laugh at their lame attempts at humor. I was well liked, could youi imagine, what they would do if they actually didn't like me.

[Edited 2015-11-05 17:01:09]
 
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WarRI1
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Fri Nov 06, 2015 1:32 am

Quoting DLFREEBIRD (Reply 44):
oh please, i had to endure Gail the whale with the big fat tail, thought i was very tiny in grade school.
also, the boys used to call out Gale Warnings, when i walked into a room.

I must say that your name rhyme gave me a chuckle because I had that also with my first name. Of course even at my age, I am still a boy at heart. My children went through it, now my grandchildren. Most of us do grow up and learn to respect each other, some never do. My son was called toy soldier, thin man etc because of his height. Now at 6'5 and three hundred pounds, I and others do not call him anything but his name. My wife and daughter, the same with the name rhymes. It will never change with children, and that is the key, remembering we were all children.
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directorguy
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sat Nov 14, 2015 11:26 am

My first name (Omar) is the same as my last name.
In my country, we have a First Name/Father's Name/Grandfather's Name/Great-Grandfather's Name OR Family Name system. It is normal for people to use their father/grandfather's name as their 'last' name. People who do not have a 'proper' last name simply have their great-grandfather's name (this is the case with me). When I have children, very possibly they will have a different surname as it can 'shift' with each passing generation, unless I specifically request I want their last great-great-grandfather added.

When my parents named me, they did not necessarily notice what they did, as I could have easily used my grandfather's name as my 'last' name. However, I grew up in countries with a First Name/Last Name system, and have gotten used to it. All my documents-passport, credit cards, graduation certificate say Omar Omar.

This has gotten a few jokes-especially when people ask for my name, then my surname, then thinking I misheard, ask me again for my surname. But I just ignore it, and am proud of my name. It also makes me unique, and is part of who I am. If it really bothered me, I could have simply started using another last name, and maybe asked the government to add another ancestor to the end of my name-but I would have ended up with a very boring name.

To make things worse, people never refer to my Dad by his given name, but call him Omar as well (since before I was born). Very complicated =)
 
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einsteinboricua
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Sat Nov 14, 2015 4:25 pm

Quoting IADCA (Reply 43):
It's still probably applicable if it's the feminine of your name.

Let's assume my name is Gabriel (it's not)...my daughter (if I ever have one) would be called Ashley Gabrielle (just to give an example. Don't have a name for a daughter yet).

I've always been of the opinion to NOT continue using the same name (at least, let it skip a generation). My middle name is my maternal grandfather's name in English. I don't use it at all except on official stuff (license, passport), mostly because it just doesn't flow (and my dad's side of the family has trouble understanding that it's two names, not one).

If any of my kids want to name their kids after me, that's fine with me. None of my kids will be named after me, though.

Quoting IADCA (Reply 43):
Quoting einsteinboricua (Reply 39):
Mother said she wanted to call me Jean ...I wasn't onboard with it when she first told me, but later on I think it could have suited me better.

If you were concerned about getting teased about having a female name, that's almost certainly even worse.

For all we know she could have spelt it as Jan...adding a middle name (Pol or Paul, which my mom said was in the cards) would have eliminated all doubts about whether it was a boy or a girl. Kinda hard to mispronounce Jean Paul.

Quoting DLFREEBIRD (Reply 44):
oh please, i had to endure Gail the whale with the big fat tail, thought i was very tiny in grade school.
also, the boys used to call out Gale Warnings, when i walked into a room.

You poor man...school must have been a drag. Although, imagine if you were obsessed with weather...that last one would be gold.

Quoting WarRI1 (Reply 45):
I must say that your name rhyme gave me a chuckle because I had that also with my first name.

I think most names have something to them that makes them vulnerable for teasings like that. My mom's name is Ana, only one person calls her Ana-banana and that's because she allows them to do so. Her nickname is Annie, so her sister teases her sometimes by calling her Annie Mary.
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aerdingus
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Tue Nov 17, 2015 1:45 pm

My name is Irish. Aoife. Looks like a vowel convention I know, but it´s basically a version of Eva, just pronounced with an -f. Sometimes in Ireland people would call me Eva by mistake. It's a very popular name in Ireland, me best friend´s name is also Aoife. It was when I moved to Spain in 2012 when the name actually blew me European colleagues minds, they couldn´t believe it when I told them that in Ireland the name was on the Coke bottles, just like Maria or Jose in Spain. I mostly took it on the chin, as if we were all the same nothing would be interesting, I just remember one rude bitch asking why my mother would name me that. I generally just cringed in waiting in hospitals, gov offices and Domino´s ha when they strangled me name "Ayofeee?" or the worst was "Oif"?    or "Oafy" because it made me feel like an oaf, like Shrek. One of me supervisors even took to just calling me "Ufo" as a joke, which I did think was funny. I came home last year and the experience made me realise how lucky I am to have my name, even if me Starbuck´s in Berlin came to me as "Abra"   
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Vio
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RE: Has Your Name Served You Well Or Badly?

Fri Nov 20, 2015 9:58 am

Interesting topic. My full first name is Viorel but everyone calls me Vio, including my wife, parents, co-workers and friends. I've been thinking about legally changing my name to the short form. It will make it a lot easier for me.
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