Prior to the referendum there was no Hard and Soft Brexit, just Brexit, the difference is a construct after the vote.
The words have probably not been used, but of course different exit models have been discussed.
The EU position has been the same throughout, the freedoms are not up for discussion, so regardless of how you state it, the EU will give the UK access to the common market if they accept the freedoms,
There is no such thing as "accept the freedoms", those freedoms are the common market and the UK is just as welcome outside the EU as it is inside.
the UK voters have stated that they want to take back control of their country, there was no vote about access to this versus access to that etc etc etc.
The UK voters have stated that they want to remain and/or to leave. Those voters in favor of the Norwegian model for sure didn´t want to "take back control of their country" in the sense you seem to imply, they obviously wanted all those common market rules to remain.
Funny how the Brexit graph does not reflect the vote, so is it a case of the government not heeding the wishes of the people or catering to the special interest?
Since about 60% (plus arguably 18%) don´t want to leave the common market it may be both, but sure as hell the government is ignoring the voters wishes. They just conveniently ignore that "leave" does not, not even by a long shot, mean hard Brexit. There is no reason not have a referendum on hard or soft brexit, since it doesn´t touch the question of cancelling the brexit, but they are not doing that, because they know perfectly well that "Hard Brexit" would die a quick and hard death in such a referendum. I wonder whos special interests they have so deeply at heart.