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CCGPV
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 1:17 am

MaverickM11 wrote:
luckyone wrote:
CCGPV wrote:

Seriously, go to a doctor. There are ways to fix it and get help. Its a very common and fixable issue.

Seriously, please let that be the last comment you make in this thread. Is it common? Yes. Is it fixable--approximately 1/3 of patients suffering from depression do not experience a remission when treated with just medication. Some deal with it. Some don't.

mbmbos wrote:
This is heart breaking.

Just saw a meme this morning that said: "Check on your strong friend." I think the gist of it is no one knows who, among friends and family, suffer in silence. So make no assumptions. And make sure everyone you love is in good shape. Check up on them. Let them know you care, let them know they are valued, let them know you're happy to listen.

We've got to break this chain of suicides.

Unfortunately suicide is nothing new. A few stats:
Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US for all ages. (CDC)

Every day, approximately 105 Americans die by suicide. (CDC)

There is one death by suicide in the US every 12 minutes. (CDC)

Depression affects 20-25% of Americans ages 18+ in a given year. (CDC)

Suicide takes the lives of over 38,000 Americans every year. (CDC)

The highest suicide rates in the US are among Whites, American Indians and Alaska Natives. African Americans have the lowest rates.

Males are 3 times more likely to die by suicide than females. White men are 70% of suicide deaths.

Not to derail the thread but this is why I thought Kate Spade’s suicide was so shocking—you just never here about women. Nonetheless terrible to hear both for her and Anthony. They both seemed like extraordinary people.


Women attempt a lot more than men but they choose less violent ways so its often not successful. I'm not really sure that's a "good" thing but it is what it is.

There's so much stigma around it all. Its like cancer...it effects everyone equally regardless of wealth or power.

For me, it was personal shame and not wanting to "let others down" whatever stupid thought process that meant. I don't know what Bourdain went though but I can imagine his lifestyle is quite lonely. Being itinerant and constantly talking about "awesome" experiences while being shuffled from interview to interview, jet lagged and prodded for content could get old. Everyone envies your life of food, fame and travel while you're dead inside thinking "why do I feel like this" "Why do I deserve this?" Add a history of substance abuse and the constant struggle to maintain that and you're looking at a heavy burden.
Stay curious
 
CCGPV
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 1:20 am

luckyone wrote:
MaverickM11 wrote:
luckyone wrote:
Seriously, please let that be the last comment you make in this thread. Is it common? Yes. Is it fixable--approximately 1/3 of patients suffering from depression do not experience a remission when treated with just medication. Some deal with it. Some don't.


Unfortunately suicide is nothing new. A few stats:
Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US for all ages. (CDC)

Every day, approximately 105 Americans die by suicide. (CDC)

There is one death by suicide in the US every 12 minutes. (CDC)

Depression affects 20-25% of Americans ages 18+ in a given year. (CDC)

Suicide takes the lives of over 38,000 Americans every year. (CDC)

The highest suicide rates in the US are among Whites, American Indians and Alaska Natives. African Americans have the lowest rates.

Males are 3 times more likely to die by suicide than females. White men are 70% of suicide deaths.

Not to derail the thread but this is why I thought Kate Spade’s suicide was so shocking—you just never here about women. Nonetheless terrible to hear both for her and Anthony. They both seemed like extraordinary people.

So, women are actually more likely to attempt. They just use less immediately lethal means than men. Women attempt via means such as an overdose, carbon monoxide poisoning, or cutting. They're usually found or are able to call for help, whereas men tend to either use a firearm, or suicide by cop, which is truly terrifying.


Pretty much. Its the real tragedy of gun violence in the USA. Most "gun deaths" are actually just depressed people killing themselves. Many of them soldiers and senior citizens. In other countries without access to firearms you see more jumping from heights and poisonings. People always find a way. It shows the tenacity of the determined human condition.
Stay curious
 
salttee
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 3:11 am

NIKV69 wrote:
So shocked this morning. Sat behind him on a JFK-LAS flight couple of years ago. Up close in person he looked terrible. I am sure some of it was drugs but who knows what demons he had.
He had ended his dalliance with heroin thirty years earlier. You are out of line slandering a dead man.
 
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CitizenJustin
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 3:19 am

salttee wrote:
NIKV69 wrote:
So shocked this morning. Sat behind him on a JFK-LAS flight couple of years ago. Up close in person he looked terrible. I am sure some of it was drugs but who knows what demons he had.
He had ended his dalliance with heroin thirty years earlier. You are out of line slandering a dead man.


Yes, but his alcoholism is another thing that likely contributes to this,
 
salttee
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 3:19 am

So you're another person with no understanding of depression spouting opinions of his poor moral character?
 
texdravid
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 4:51 am

salttee wrote:
texdravid wrote:
Great story of perseverance and will.
And I assume from that post in this thread that you believe that the people who suicide lack perseverance and will power?


You would be correct.
It’s a weakness and happens when you have an individual who has things going wrong in life and is untethered from societal “parachutes” such as family, faith, and a sense of purpose, like a job.

Mix in heavy, unrepentant poly substance abuse and you have a recipe for self harm.

When you look around the world, you have people starving and begging for food in places like Mumbai, defecating on the streets and railroad tracks and lack even basic clean water and air and they persevere.

How about the poor Bangladeshi or Filipino maids toiling in the hot sun for the Arab sheiks? They bust their butts to send money back home so their kids can have a better life than them.

And then you have the spoiled, rich, narcissist, drug laden and pseudo intellectual western society, like Kate Spade and this guy Bourdain.

I feel terrible for their young children, one of whom got a note from their suicidal mother. I feel anger for the cowardly and irresponsible Bourdain and Spade.

Sorry, not sorry.
Tort reform now. Throw lawyers in jail later.
 
salttee
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 5:09 am

You couldn't have done a better job of portraying a shallow uneducated thinker if it was your assignment to do so for a psych class.
You have no way to be able to see it, but your above statements are on par with those of a six year old who is asked to tell us how a plane flies; except that your answer above is sprinkled with the theme of hatred.
 
texdravid
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 5:25 am

salttee wrote:
You couldn't have done a better job of portraying a shallow uneducated thinker if it was your assignment to do so for a psych class.
You have no way to be able to see it, but your above statements are on par with those of a six year old who is asked to tell us how a plane flies; except that your answer above is sprinkled with the theme of hatred.


Actually my post is on point and is simply calling out weakness and selfishness by people who have every reason to live for their children and have great lives compared to the downtrodden in this world.

You sir, have answered with sprinkles of hate. But then again, that’s all your replies to me. Please address the points.

For example you could say” I vehemently disagree you idiot because:

1. They are hurting, they didn’t mean it.
2. How dare you make make value judgements of others.
3. Today is not the day to judge Bourdain.

And those WOULD BE fair points and appropriate rebuttal. But of course it’s more fun for you to shriek and call me names and claim I’m a idiot and etc.

Just a hint, friend.
Tort reform now. Throw lawyers in jail later.
 
salttee
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 5:45 am

Another way of describing your intellectual understanding of depression is somewhat dated in this era of flat screens, but it works; you are on a parallel with a dog looking in at the back side of a color TV.

There are things going on that you cannot even imagine. And you're not even a little bit curious.
 
texdravid
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 6:20 am

Ha ha. You’re right. I’m the least bit curious of spoiled rich pseudo intellectuals who abuse tobacco/alcohol/drugs, have no grounding in life, make millions and have no soul and off themselves for selfish reasons and devastate the ones they are supposed to care about.

Yeah you’re right I’m not curious about that at all. I reserve my pity for the truly downtrodden and who persevere and fight every day. Those people will never have the money, fame and prestige as Bourdain or Spade, but they will always have my respect.
Tort reform now. Throw lawyers in jail later.
 
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Dutchy
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 6:23 am

texdravid wrote:
Actually my post is on point and is simply calling out weakness and selfishness by people who have every reason to live for their children and have great lives compared to the downtrodden in this world.


That is quite a statement. You do not know what it is like, good for you, but your statement is ignorant at best and insulting to each and every person whomever attempted to take their own life. It is quite a judgemental statement.
Many happy landings, greetings from The Netherlands!
 
texdravid
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 6:26 am

Dutchy wrote:
texdravid wrote:
Actually my post is on point and is simply calling out weakness and selfishness by people who have every reason to live for their children and have great lives compared to the downtrodden in this world.


That is quite a statement. You do not know what it is like, good for you, but your statement is ignorant at best and insulting to each and every person whomever attempted to take their own life. It is quite a judgemental statement.


Yes it is. The fact that modern society almost always chooses to avoid judgements and praise reckless and self destructive behavior is one of the hallmarks of today’s decadent and inane society.
Tort reform now. Throw lawyers in jail later.
 
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Jouhou
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 6:33 am

maortega15 wrote:
I really don't know how to say this, but I'm actually going through my own struggles. I've been miserable for a while now, I've been crying a lot, lack of sleep, lack of appetite, you name it. Fortunately, I am still able to type this right now.

And a word of advice to all of you out there, never tell anyone to let it go or quit dwelling unless you've been in their shoes.

I remember one poster here a while back who knew someone who committed suicide.


Hey, if you want a stranger on the internet to listen to your story, I'll hear you out.

I've been depressed to the point of suicidal ideation before, but I've acknowledged to myself that it's just that, ideation, an impulse, but it's not an option for actual doing. I could never do that to the people around me.

As for bourdain, this is the first celebrity suicide that actually has surprised me. I mean, I could see the cynicism that might indicate a tendency toward depression, but he seemed to have the kind of life that wouldn't leave someone enough time to wallow in a bad mood.

I had a co-worker who committed suicide last year. I still wake up after dreaming he was still here and tear up when I realize I was dreaming.
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AR385
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 8:00 am

In 2006 I attempted suicide. I wiil not give any details so people here don´t get any ideas. But the only reason I am here today is because they found on time
I was in very dark place. ,No hope of things getting better, Constant anguish and feeling like I was a failure.

But now, in 2008 sometimes i realize that those situations that put me there were not really something to give me a permanent solution


1) Get profesional help

2) Give a lot of support to anybody you tink/suspect is thinking about it -
 
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maortega15
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 8:28 am

If I may share more bits of my story, uhm, I've tried to share my struggles on some "other" related forum which I was actively involved in, but was berated and even insulted.

One thing I always thought that can help me go through my miserable moments and at least put a smile on my face even just for a bit is do acts of kindness for others.

Well, that backfired. Once again, I get berated and insulted for doing a good deed for someone.

Now with the news this morning, I've been crying and can't get proper sleep.

I'm currently sobbing as I type this, but I'm afraid I might be next.

2 breaking news of suicides is too much.

A word of advice, be mindful of how you treat others. Suicide and mass shootings are up and you don't know the struggles someone is going through. And when someone tries to reach out to you just for an ear to listen to, please hear them out. You just might save their life. Literally. And never tell anyone to let it go or quit dwelling unless you've been in their shoes.

Unfortunately, I always had this belief that I've treated people with kindness and respect. In response to that, some people have shown me cruelty and disrespect. In that case, I'm afraid I'm not going to make it out alive in this world.

It's a cruel world.
 
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Jouhou
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 8:36 am

maortega15 wrote:
If I may share more bits of my story, uhm, I've tried to share my struggles on some "other" related forum which I was actively involved in, but was berated and even insulted.

One thing I always thought that can help me go through my miserable moments and at least put a smile on my face even just for a bit is do acts of kindness for others.

Well, that backfired. Once again, I get berated and insulted for doing a good deed for someone.

Now with the news this morning, I've been crying and can't get proper sleep.

I'm currently sobbing as I type this, but I'm afraid I might be next.

2 breaking news of suicides is too much.

A word of advice, be mindful of how you treat others. Suicide and mass shootings are up and you don't know the struggles someone is going through. And when someone tries to reach out to you just for an ear to listen to, please hear them out. You just might save their life. Literally. And never tell anyone to let it go or quit dwelling unless you've been in their shoes.

Unfortunately, I always had this belief that I've treated people with kindness and respect. In response to that, some people have shown me cruelty and disrespect. In that case, I'm afraid I'm not going to make it out alive in this world.

It's a cruel world.


I would absolutely listen (well, on here, read) without judgement. It's the least I can do for another human feeling down, ya know?
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Jouhou
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 9:04 am

texdravid wrote:
salttee wrote:
texdravid wrote:
Great story of perseverance and will.
And I assume from that post in this thread that you believe that the people who suicide lack perseverance and will power?


You would be correct.
It’s a weakness and happens when you have an individual who has things going wrong in life and is untethered from societal “parachutes” such as family, faith, and a sense of purpose, like a job.

Mix in heavy, unrepentant poly substance abuse and you have a recipe for self harm.

When you look around the world, you have people starving and begging for food in places like Mumbai, defecating on the streets and railroad tracks and lack even basic clean water and air and they persevere.

How about the poor Bangladeshi or Filipino maids toiling in the hot sun for the Arab sheiks? They bust their butts to send money back home so their kids can have a better life than them.

And then you have the spoiled, rich, narcissist, drug laden and pseudo intellectual western society, like Kate Spade and this guy Bourdain.

I feel terrible for their young children, one of whom got a note from their suicidal mother. I feel anger for the cowardly and irresponsible Bourdain and Spade.

Sorry, not sorry.


OK, it's not just wealthy westerners who commit suicide. Seriously.

Also aren't you one of those Christian types? I'm pretty sure a primary element of being a good christian is to practice forgiveness. Forgive people for being flawed, and don't just cast judgement without knowing their story. You're just as much of a flawed human as everyone else.
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CitizenJustin
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 10:51 am

luckyone wrote:
CitizenJustin wrote:
luckyone wrote:
Seriously, please let that be the last comment you make in this thread. Is it common? Yes. Is it fixable--approximately 1/3 of patients suffering from depression do not experience a remission when treated with just medication. Some deal with it. Some don't.


Unfortunately suicide is nothing new. A few stats:
Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US for all ages. (CDC)

Every day, approximately 105 Americans die by suicide. (CDC)

There is one death by suicide in the US every 12 minutes. (CDC)

Depression affects 20-25% of Americans ages 18+ in a given year. (CDC)

Suicide takes the lives of over 38,000 Americans every year. (CDC)

The highest suicide rates in the US are among Whites, American Indians and Alaska Natives. African Americans have the lowest rates.

Males are 3 times more likely to die by suicide than females. White men are 70% of suicide deaths.



Since this spate of high profile suicides, I’ve been reading statistics on articles and they say suicide is up 30% from 1999 and the percentage is even more striking the further you go back. What do you think is contributing to such a large rise?

There are a lot of theories. Some people cite a movement away from organized religion. One is the massive campaigns in Iraq and Afghanistan resulting in a larger number of veterans, who are at higher risk for suicide. Another being the recession in the last decade resulted in a lot of young people with diminished prospects (death of the American dream is how some people put it), economic stagnation in a population that historically has seen their economic prospects grow since World War 2 (I'm specifically talking about white males here), and massive amounts of debt, and older individuals who lost their security and are hopeless. Some people say the significant migrations in the last 25 years disrupted family and community networks and as such people feel more isolated, which results in less support when they become depressed. Some people say it's related to the proliferation of firearms. There's also the opioid crisis, as what a lot of people don't know about opioids is they cause depression--about 2/3 of patients who receive opioids for more than 3-6 months will have some sort of measurable mood effect, and ironically many develop what's called "opioid-induced hyperalgesia" wherein they actually become more sensitive to pain. One of my own opinions is that healthcare has reached a point where it's capabilities can keep you alive, without actually contributing to the quality of life, and in many cases makes it worse. Now, obviously I cannot and will not make that decision for anyone else, but due to our health literacy as a society being low results in some interesting things. Speaking only for myself, but after having watched resuscitations and seen the hell people live with while receiving treatments, there will be limitations to what I allow done to me if I'm not able to make the call myself.


Thanks for the insight.
 
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CitizenJustin
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 11:06 am

texdravid wrote:
salttee wrote:
texdravid wrote:
Great story of perseverance and will.
And I assume from that post in this thread that you believe that the people who suicide lack perseverance and will power?


You would be correct.
It’s a weakness and happens when you have an individual who has things going wrong in life and is untethered from societal “parachutes” such as family, faith, and a sense of purpose, like a job.

Mix in heavy, unrepentant poly substance abuse and you have a recipe for self harm.

When you look around the world, you have people starving and begging for food in places like Mumbai, defecating on the streets and railroad tracks and lack even basic clean water and air and they persevere.

How about the poor Bangladeshi or Filipino maids toiling in the hot sun for the Arab sheiks? They bust their butts to send money back home so their kids can have a better life than them.

And then you have the spoiled, rich, narcissist, drug laden and pseudo intellectual western society, like Kate Spade and this guy Bourdain.

I feel terrible for their young children, one of whom got a note from their suicidal mother. I feel anger for the cowardly and irresponsible Bourdain and Spade.

Sorry, not sorry.


I recently read a study that showed empathy towards our fellow man is down by 40-60% since the 1980’s. Posts like yours remind me of how accurate that study is. They also found that most people with these harsh views of suicide victims haven’t had much trauma in their lives, thusly they’re unable to deal with it appropriately. Essentially, you’re useless if somene needs your help.

Besides, there’s nothing wrong about caring for people. Yes, even if it takes a little time, effort and money out of your pocket, which I know you’d never do. I’d hate to run into you in an emergency that required a bit of humanity.
 
ltbewr
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 12:04 pm

It is very frustrating to hear of someone committing suicide. The final act of taking one's life can be from many factors. Long term depression and related mental health problems. Illness. Extreme shame. Fear. Drug, alcohol, gambling or other addictions. Economic loss or poverty. Loss of a person or persons close to us. Loss of a home. A victim of physical violence, hate, harassment, bullying and other psychological trauma. 'Different' like if GLTBQ or get outed of your status. Have an odd appearance, skinny or obese. There can be other factors too.
When we hear of someone taking or attempt to take their own life, it makes us wonder what signs we missed and if we are also at risk of being in the same situation. Treatment of those with mental health problems is not an exact science. They are extremely difficult to treat, drugs may help, but may make the situation worse.
For too many, they are afraid their mental health problem may mean a loss of family, friends, employment, so hide it. Far too many have no or little access to mental health care due to lack of money or affordable care. There is also the lack of support those at risk of suicide may have. They may be shunned or avoided by those around them out of fear, don't want to get involved or don't know how to help.
I don't have any real answers but to say if you know someone that is in danger of taking their own life, try as best as can to get them help from professionals, or just be there to listen.
 
CCGPV
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 1:10 pm

texdravid wrote:
salttee wrote:
texdravid wrote:
Great story of perseverance and will.
And I assume from that post in this thread that you believe that the people who suicide lack perseverance and will power?


You would be correct.
It’s a weakness and happens when you have an individual who has things going wrong in life and is untethered from societal “parachutes” such as family, faith, and a sense of purpose, like a job.

Mix in heavy, unrepentant poly substance abuse and you have a recipe for self harm.

When you look around the world, you have people starving and begging for food in places like Mumbai, defecating on the streets and railroad tracks and lack even basic clean water and air and they persevere.

How about the poor Bangladeshi or Filipino maids toiling in the hot sun for the Arab sheiks? They bust their butts to send money back home so their kids can have a better life than them.

And then you have the spoiled, rich, narcissist, drug laden and pseudo intellectual western society, like Kate Spade and this guy Bourdain.

I feel terrible for their young children, one of whom got a note from their suicidal mother. I feel anger for the cowardly and irresponsible Bourdain and Spade.

Sorry, not sorry.


I love this character.
Stay curious
 
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Aesma
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sat Jun 09, 2018 5:14 pm

I've been depressed but not "terminally depressed", however my father is bipolar so I've seen deep depression up close. When you're in that state your brain doesn't function properly so trying to blame someone or elicit culpability or similar sentiments in them is useless and probably counterproductive.
New Technology is the name we give to stuff that doesn't work yet. Douglas Adams
 
NIKV69
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 12:09 am

salttee wrote:
You are out of line slandering a dead man.


Shall I call the Drama Llama?

Give it a rest.
I am the Googlizer!!!
 
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maortega15
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 3:09 am

I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks
 
stratosphere
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 3:24 am

maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks


Did they really say that to you? Look I have one friend who did commit suicide and in my mind this guy had it all he had a beautiful wife and a young son and twins on the way he got in a fight with his wife and went in the bedroom and blew his brains out. Now he was drinking and I am sure he didn't realize what he did was permanent. So I am saying this to you before you so something that is permanent seek help from others if the suicide hotline isn't it seek out friends I am sure you have people who do care about you. One thing about suicide you can't take that back. I read what you said I spent more years than you have showing kindness to others and getting kicked in the teeth my whole family has passed away the only family member I have is my brother who is a heroin addict. I found my escape in animal rescue they give me a reason to go on I am single no wife or kids my animals are my life. If it wasn't for them I would be in the same place as you are now. Don't feel all is lost you would be surprised what will give you a reason to live.
 
OMP777X
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 3:29 am

maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks

I really hope you choose to reconsider. There are people out there like myself who understand the world can be a very awful place, and will hear you out. You can private message me on here of you would like to. Either way, you are honestly a valuable person. I can tell you from my personal experience after never having been suicidal but having once been placed into a outpatient treatment program of people who had all attempted at some point and made it into inpatient psych treatment (when I was younger and living with my parents, I agreed to go to this thinking it was an anger management group, and was later told that didn't exist for people my age). I hadn't initially felt comfortable with my being there at first since I had only dealt with depression and OCD up to a point, but not to the point of hospitalization like my fellow patients, so I felt I couldn't relate to their circumstances in wanting to harm themselves. To make a long story short, some of those people in the group were the most pure and genuine individuals I had ever met, and I believe all were happy to be there to live through our group therapy. I smoked many cigarettes with many of them on our breaks and learned lots about myself by going to that program (and quit smoking since). In the end, I haven't heard of anyone in that group or anywhere else who regrets surviving a suicide attempt. I have seen some of the group members outside of group in public since and all are happy to be living (who I have spoken with since). I don't know why you hurt so badly, but please feel free to share with me if you would like to. I am all ears.
"Happy Flighting!"
 
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Jouhou
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:05 am

Hopefully it's not really too late for him.

Also depression isn't a choice. The sensation of depression is entirely about your neurotransmitters being out of whack, since they are exactly what control how you feel. You can't just think "happy thoughts" to find your way out of it. You can have a slow series of epiphanies to find your way out of it, but it takes time.

Also, people are most likely to commit suicide when things are actually improving. Their brains are so used to being unhappy that the neurotransmitters try over compensating for the lack of misery.
情報
 
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Dutchy
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:11 am

maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks


Go for it, nobody here can stop you. But since you reached out to the hotline and on here, it says to me you want a change in your life. Death is a permanent change. My advice call a family member or a close friend and seek professional help and get the tools to change your life for the better. It is possible, give it a change.
Many happy landings, greetings from The Netherlands!
 
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DIRECTFLT
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:28 am

The US white male's "Burden" . . .

Image
Smoothest Ride so far ~ AA A300B4-600R ~~ Favorite Aviation Author ~ Robert J. Serling
 
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Tugger
Posts: 10902
Joined: Tue Apr 18, 2006 8:38 am

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:35 am

texdravid wrote:
How can you do this to your young kid?
Lots of people struggle, have financial hardship, crappy jobs, crappy relationships and health issues but they keep fighting all their life because for people like Anthony their pain is over but for his daughter it’s just beginning.

I’m sure he had health problems that lead to his mental issues. He always was a heavy smoker, drinker and drug user. He was not a hero. He’s a guy that went around the world and traveled and had a life that few could even dream about.

I think a lot of these people are committing suicide because society is being separated from family, religion, and long term stable jobs, which are the three biggest anchors on life to keep us even and grounded and secure.

Your mind is your biggest anchor in life. And you can never escape it. In another thread asking if hell is real I noted that it is real and in peoples minds and that is what makes it so horrible and pernicious: It is inescapable.... the voice of depression always waits patiently.


WildcatYXU wrote:
So you have to excuse me, but I'm somewhat not capable to understand the motives of a person who's successful and probably financially sound and yet he (she) decides to finish it.

You are of course excused. Because you do not know what the mental illness known as depression is. Life is difficult, everyone experiences low points but depression requires none of what you describe you and your wife went through (and I in no way am belittling or dismissing what you both struggled and battled though). Imagine those struggles but in your mind alone, with no escape, constantly there, sometimes hiding but you know.... its there. As I said about hell, the worst part is it is in you, in you mind.

Help is available and I hope everyone who needs it reaches out to get it. It is not always successful, but it works.

Tugg
I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. - W. Shatner
There are many kinds of sentences that we think state facts about the world but that are really just expressions of our attitudes. - F. Ramsey
 
CCGPV
Posts: 1292
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2018 5:18 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 2:07 pm

maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks


Boy this is right down the line for a melodramatic goodbye. You're moving from the cry for help into the attention getting mode with posts like this.

You have the power to do something. You can walk into any emergency room on the planet and get help right now.

The choice is yours. Think of all the airbus vs boeing debates you'll miss out on. That's the real shame.
Stay curious
 
CCGPV
Posts: 1292
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2018 5:18 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 2:09 pm

DIRECTFLT wrote:
The US white male's "Burden" . . .

Image


All that privilege must make them feel really guilty about life. Perhaps they're doing all the rest of us a favor?
Stay curious
 
CCGPV
Posts: 1292
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2018 5:18 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:13 pm

Kiwirob wrote:
Dutchy wrote:
maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks


Go for it, nobody here can stop you. But since you reached out to the hotline and on here, it says to me you want a change in your life. Death is a permanent change. My advice call a family member or a close friend and seek professional help and get the tools to change your life for the better. It is possible, give it a change.


I’m generally an unempathetic person but even I wouldn’t tell a person who said they’re going to pop off to ‘go for it’. That’s crossing the line. As he has not posted since???????


Someone should call 911 and get the police to talk to the administration of this website so we can have cops go to his house. The moderators and administrators here have the ability (and some would say the obligation) to do this very easily. They should act.
Stay curious
 
Kiwirob
Posts: 13095
Joined: Mon Jun 13, 2005 2:16 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:14 pm

Dutchy wrote:
maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks


Go for it, nobody here can stop you. But since you reached out to the hotline and on here, it says to me you want a change in your life. Death is a permanent change. My advice call a family member or a close friend and seek professional help and get the tools to change your life for the better. It is possible, give it a change.


I’m generally an unempathetic person but even I wouldn’t tell a person who said they’re going to pop off to ‘go for it’. That’s crossing the line. As he has not posted since???????
 
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Dutchy
Posts: 11985
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2007 1:25 am

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:36 pm

Kiwirob wrote:
Dutchy wrote:
Go for it, nobody here can stop you. But since you reached out to the hotline and on here, it says to me you want a change in your life. Death is a permanent change. My advice call a family member or a close friend and seek professional help and get the tools to change your life for the better. It is possible, give it a change.


I’m generally an unempathetic person but even I wouldn’t tell a person who said they’re going to pop off to ‘go for it’. That’s crossing the line. As he has not posted since???????


I sincerely hope he does read what I wrote after that and that he will seek the appropriate help and he will turn his life around for the better.

As for you, read everything before making such a comment.
Many happy landings, greetings from The Netherlands!
 
texdravid
Posts: 1830
Joined: Fri May 14, 2004 3:21 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:56 pm

That graphic that shows the steep rise in white male suicIde is part of the untold story of why America is a declining power.

The white male had it all in the 1950s-90’s.
Power, prestige, and for those who sought it, a steady job.

But ever since NAFTA and free trade, industrial automation, and the rise of the illegal immigrant, their stock has continued in a free fall.

All of those three reasons have sharply decreased the amount of work for blue collar, high school educated only white men.
So now they turn to drugs and alchol and meth, and stopped marrying and having kids and homes and turned into the stereotypical loser in his pajamas in his mom’s basement.

Their anger and frustration affect all of us because they and their similar loser sons are the ones who go and shoot people up.

So while black crime makes inner cities dangerous, one cannot forget the white male component to America’s decline. So as they go, America goes.

I don’t see any way out either. These guys are on a one way road to serfdom and self destruction. It will be filled and has already been, by Asians and Indian men, who will rule the 21st century in AmerIca.

America belongs to the smartest and hardest working men, not to the people who give up, off themselves or commit crimes.
Tort reform now. Throw lawyers in jail later.
 
CCGPV
Posts: 1292
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2018 5:18 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 5:11 pm

texdravid wrote:
That graphic that shows the steep rise in white male suicIde is part of the untold story of why America is a declining power.

The white male had it all in the 1950s-90’s.
Power, prestige, and for those who sought it, a steady job.

But ever since NAFTA and free trade, industrial automation, and the rise of the illegal immigrant, their stock has continued in a free fall.

All of those three reasons have sharply decreased the amount of work for blue collar, high school educated only white men.
So now they turn to drugs and alchol and meth, and stopped marrying and having kids and homes and turned into the stereotypical loser in his pajamas in his mom’s basement.

Their anger and frustration affect all of us because they and their similar loser sons are the ones who go and shoot people up.

So while black crime makes inner cities dangerous, one cannot forget the white male component to America’s decline. So as they go, America goes.

I don’t see any way out either. These guys are on a one way road to serfdom and self destruction. It will be filled and has already been, by Asians and Indian men, who will rule the 21st century in AmerIca.

America belongs to the smartest and hardest working men, not to the people who give up, off themselves or commit crimes.


So you're part of the problem being an immigrant and all, right? You're responsible for this travesty.
Stay curious
 
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DL717
Posts: 2241
Joined: Wed May 23, 2018 10:53 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:24 pm

maortega15 wrote:
I just called a suicide hotline for help and that's the last draw for me.

I was told that I chose to be miserable. In times like this, people need a support system, not someone to place the blame on them. If I can't run to a suicide hotline, then where else can you run to?!

This is why people commit suicide. Because they ran out of options.

Unfortunately, my options have run out too.

For 20+ years, I did everything I could to show kindness to others to help me get through what I'm going thorugh, but I got chastised and even insulted.

The world would be in a better place without someone like me.

I say this with a heavy heart, but I feel it's time for me to clock out.

It's been nice knowing you all.

Thanks


Don’t do this. Smoke a pack of cigs, have a stiff drink and go to sleep. Whatever it takes to get you to a psychiatrist tomorrow. If you can’t do this, get to a mental health hospital now. Any hospital. They will transfer you. You can overcome this regardless what you feel today.
Funny. It only took one pandemic for those who argue endlessly about natural selection to stop believing in natural selection.
 
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Jouhou
Posts: 2539
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 8:44 pm

CCGPV wrote:
Kiwirob wrote:
Dutchy wrote:

Go for it, nobody here can stop you. But since you reached out to the hotline and on here, it says to me you want a change in your life. Death is a permanent change. My advice call a family member or a close friend and seek professional help and get the tools to change your life for the better. It is possible, give it a change.


I’m generally an unempathetic person but even I wouldn’t tell a person who said they’re going to pop off to ‘go for it’. That’s crossing the line. As he has not posted since???????


Someone should call 911 and get the police to talk to the administration of this website so we can have cops go to his house. The moderators and administrators here have the ability (and some would say the obligation) to do this very easily. They should act.


I doubt they can do much more than derive a general location of his residence by the ip range he posts from, and possibly his real name If he filled out that field.
情報
 
LMP737
Posts: 6077
Joined: Wed May 08, 2002 4:06 pm

Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 9:09 pm

texdravid wrote:



When you look around the world, you have people starving and begging for food in places like Mumbai, defecating on the streets and railroad tracks and lack even basic clean water and air and they persevere.

How about the poor Bangladeshi or Filipino maids toiling in the hot sun for the Arab sheiks? They bust their butts to send money back home so their kids can have a better life than them.


Sorry, not sorry.


Using your logic if those same Filipino or Bangladeshi maids offed themselves that would be understandable. After all, what do they have to live for?
Never take financial advice from co-workers.
 
CCGPV
Posts: 1292
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 10:10 pm

Jouhou wrote:
CCGPV wrote:
Kiwirob wrote:

I’m generally an unempathetic person but even I wouldn’t tell a person who said they’re going to pop off to ‘go for it’. That’s crossing the line. As he has not posted since???????


Someone should call 911 and get the police to talk to the administration of this website so we can have cops go to his house. The moderators and administrators here have the ability (and some would say the obligation) to do this very easily. They should act.


I doubt they can do much more than derive a general location of his residence by the ip range he posts from, and possibly his real name If he filled out that field.


Ah, it was an attention getting post anyway.

15 minutes of research and I found the guy. He's not in the states.
Stay curious
 
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Jouhou
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Sun Jun 10, 2018 10:48 pm

CCGPV wrote:
Jouhou wrote:
CCGPV wrote:

Someone should call 911 and get the police to talk to the administration of this website so we can have cops go to his house. The moderators and administrators here have the ability (and some would say the obligation) to do this very easily. They should act.


I doubt they can do much more than derive a general location of his residence by the ip range he posts from, and possibly his real name If he filled out that field.


Ah, it was an attention getting post anyway.

15 minutes of research and I found the guy. He's not in the states.


Huh, all I could tell from his post history was that he's in his late 20s, and I wondered if he was trying to be a 27 clubber like my co-worker last year did.
情報
 
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Dutchy
Posts: 11985
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Mon Jun 11, 2018 5:05 pm

CCGPV wrote:
Jouhou wrote:
CCGPV wrote:

Someone should call 911 and get the police to talk to the administration of this website so we can have cops go to his house. The moderators and administrators here have the ability (and some would say the obligation) to do this very easily. They should act.


I doubt they can do much more than derive a general location of his residence by the ip range he posts from, and possibly his real name If he filled out that field.


Ah, it was an attention getting post anyway.

15 minutes of research and I found the guy. He's not in the states.


I think you need to treat any mentioning of committing suicide seriously. There is something wrong when you mention this. This isn't your average "getting attention" post.
Many happy landings, greetings from The Netherlands!
 
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Tugger
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Re: Another suicide; Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

Mon Jun 11, 2018 9:55 pm

This is kind of sweet and a simple testament to Mr. Bourdain and the kind of person he was. I remember the laugh many had about this woman's review. I like that he saw the better of it after seeing it we all likely did and stood forward and offered support.
https://www.buzzfeed.com/juliareinstein ... ive-garden
"She is never mean — even when circumstances would clearly excuse a sharp elbow, a cruel remark," he wrote. "In fact, watching Marilyn struggle to find something nice to say about a place she clearly loathes is part of the fun. She is, unfailingly, a good neighbor and good citizen first — and entertainer second."


Suicide is not easy, it is not an easy way out. It is the saddest and worst way out. Some we understand and most we don't and those in particular should be afforded some benefit of doubt as we will never know the depths a person has gone to and lives with to finally do something like this. I know I decided long ago that I want to see what tomorrow might bring because it might just bring a smile and some happiness. I can only imagine that others decide tomorrow will never bring anything like that but i realized I just never know what each day brings so I will enjoy it as much as I can.

I know this might sounds a little sad but I assure you I am not. I am very happy (normal happy, cuz' you know, all the other crap that any given day can bring) and do very well and long ago worked through what ever it was that had me lost.

Tugg
I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. - W. Shatner
There are many kinds of sentences that we think state facts about the world but that are really just expressions of our attitudes. - F. Ramsey

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