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trpmb6
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Alternate Endings to Movies

Tue Aug 21, 2018 6:33 pm

Come up with a funny or witty alternate ending to a movie. Note, this will necessitate spoilers to some degree, so perhaps we should try to stick to movies that are ~5 years or older? Just use judgment. And if you are someone who doesn't like spoilers, this thread probably isn't for you.

Titanic -
Rose helps Jack up onto the door and he lives. (I believe mythbusters proved they could have both fit and stayed afloat)

Braveheart -
"You can take my carbon emissions! But you can never take my MEEAAATTTT!" (if you're following that other thread that inspired this one you'll understand the reference)
 
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casinterest
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Tue Aug 21, 2018 7:07 pm

My God, it's full of static electricity.
Where ever you go, there you are.
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 6:36 pm

Anakin has the high ground.
 
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casinterest
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:00 pm

The Warden Makes Andy clean his cell every once in awhile and fills the hole in with Cement.
Where ever you go, there you are.
 
vikkyvik
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:19 pm

casinterest wrote:
The Warden Makes Andy clean his cell every once in awhile and fills the hole in with Cement.


Better yet, Red can't remember the name of the Mexican town where Andy went.

(see Family Guy's parody)
I'm watching Jeopardy. The category is worst Madonna songs. "This one from 1987 is terrible".
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:38 pm

Goose doesn't die and he and Maverick go on to win the Top Gun honors in their class. Movie comes to an end with them singing great balls of fire while taking out Migs
 
desertjets
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:52 pm

In Return of the Jedi Han and Leia fail to bring down the shield. Lets just say things don't go too well above Endor.
Stop drop and roll will not save you in hell. --- seen on a church marque in rural Virginia
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:57 pm

desertjets wrote:
In Return of the Jedi Han and Leia fail to bring down the shield. Lets just say things don't go too well above Endor.


But this may not have come to pass because Anakin had the high ground...
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 8:00 pm

In Empire Strikes Back, just after Vader reveals himself to be Luke's father, Maury Povic walks onto the catwalk with DNA results.

Image
 
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seb146
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:10 pm

Reverend Moore declared the town council dissolved so Ren and the entire town held a dance party in the town square.

OR

Reverend Moore annexed the flour mill so it was in the city limits, so Ren had to have prom at the bar where Willard got the snot beat out of him.
You bet I'm pumped!!! I just had a green tea!!!
 
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casinterest
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:15 pm

Maverick never engages, and the Russians win.
Where ever you go, there you are.
 
LittleFokker
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:23 pm

Home Alone, 2018 version: Kevin's mom Skypes him using the airplane Wi-Fi and finds out he's okay. The McCallisters have their scheduled glorious time in Paris. Kevin commits suicide and lets the Wet Bandits have whatever they want.
"All human activities are doomed to failure." - Jean Paul Sartre
 
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TWA772LR
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:26 pm

trpmb6 wrote:
Goose doesn't die and he and Maverick go on to win the Top Gun honors in their class. Movie comes to an end with them singing great balls of fire while taking out Migs

I was thinking Maverick gets shot down in the final scene.
When wasn't America great?


The thoughts and opinions shared under this username are mine and are not influenced by my employer.
 
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Tugger
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 12:13 am

Malcolm Crow (Bruce Willis' character in The Sixth Sense) isn't dead.

The Statue of Liberty didn't survive the war in The Planet of the Apes (maybe instead a pizza place does? Planet of the Pizzas?)

Dorthy is captured by the witch and becomes her apprentice and helps the wicked witch of the west take over Oz....

Tugg
I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. - W. Shatner
There are many kinds of sentences that we think state facts about the world but that are really just expressions of our attitudes. - F. Ramsey
 
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seb146
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 1:43 am

Magenta and Riff Raff decide to leave Dr. Frankenfurter on Earth, never to return but he continues his experiments.
You bet I'm pumped!!! I just had a green tea!!!
 
jupiter2
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 8:04 am

Trump isn't actually president, as the election was actually a bad movie.

Crocodile Dundee didn't actually have the bigger knife.
 
BlueberryWheats
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 9:21 am

Well, didn't take too long for politics to be shoehorned into this thread too.

Armageddon... the detonator fails. They can't blow up the asteroid. Everyone dies.

My Cousin Vinny... he fails. Ralph Macchio gets the chair.

A Few Good Men... Jack Nicholson's character doesn't confess, doesn't give the while "You can't handle the truth" speech. He gets off free while Tom Cruise's career as a JAG lawyer is ruined.
The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut.
 
Airstud
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 10:09 am

Carla Jean Moss shoots Anton Chigurh dead while he is busy flipping the coin.
Pancakes are delicious.
 
sccutler
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 10:50 am

Zack Mayo graduates, moves on to Pensacola and jets. Paula goes back to the cardboard box factory, hoping to snag another officer candidate.
...three miles from BRONS, clear for the ILS one five approach...
 
Bongodog1964
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 12:06 pm

Top Gun - Maverick discovers that Charlie isn't interested in men
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 1:02 pm

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (the correct one) - Charlie doesn't give back the everlasting gobstopper. Wonka goes into despair and shuts down the factory. Charlie becomes rich and famous years later as he is the only person in the world with candy. He offers it at a premium price for 1 minute of enjoyment. (also ew)
 
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Erebus
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 1:10 pm

Back to the future III - Doc Brown travels back to the present with Marty instead of staying in the past and having kids with Clara.

That movie ending was messed up. :crazy:
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 1:19 pm

Erebus wrote:
Back to the future III - Doc Brown travels back to the present with Marty instead of staying in the past and having kids with Clara.

That movie ending was messed up. :crazy:


Yeah, Movies 1 and 2 Doc was constantly harping on and on about restoring timelines.

Movie 3 WELP I'm gonna go hitch myself to a woman and change history completely!
 
ltbewr
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 5:41 pm

There were a number of movies in the 1930's to mid-1960's that had different endings that the original book or writers had done. A lot of the early 'gangster' films had to show the bad guy getting arrested or getting executed. Some had be more positive in their endings like with the 'Grapes of Wrath' and others like 'Of Mice and Men' had to be changed due to racial issues so not to prevent the film from being shown in the deep south of the USA pre-1965.
 
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seb146
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 5:56 pm

Rhett never goes to Charleston but, instead, stays to rebuild Tara. Scarlett becomes pregnant again but no one is ever really sure if it is Rhett's or Ashley's.
You bet I'm pumped!!! I just had a green tea!!!
 
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trpmb6
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 6:03 pm

I was going to try and do Pulp fiction but I couldn't figure out where to start or end
 
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Dutchy
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Re: Alternate Endings to Movies

Thu Aug 23, 2018 7:22 pm

trpmb6 wrote:
I was going to try and do Pulp fiction but I couldn't figure out where to start or end


:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
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