jalapeno and cheddar from Kroger/Fred Meyer with a schmeer of plain cream cheese

Just a cinnamon bagel with cream cheese. "Keep it simple, stupid."

Everything Bagel with Bacon and Scallion Cream Cheese.

seb146 wrote:

jalapeno and cheddar from Kroger/Fred Meyer with a schmeer of plain cream cheese

What in the name of GOD is that? Come to NY go to a real bagel place and get a cinnamon raisin with your schmeer. Much better. In fact my local place has homemade strawberry cream cheese. Total food porn.

seb146 wrote:

jalapeno and cheddar from Kroger/Fred Meyer with a schmeer of plain cream cheese

OY GEVALT!!! What kind of goyishe michigas is this??? My bubbe (of beloved memory) just rolled over in her grave.

"Bagels" from KROGER? Oy vey. I think I'm going to plotz.



The CORRECT bagel is a bagel from a reputable Jewish baker known for making bagels. In SE Michigan, the Detroit Bagel Factory was an excellent example. Noah's is acceptable.

DocLightning wrote:

seb146 wrote:

jalapeno and cheddar from Kroger/Fred Meyer with a schmeer of plain cream cheese

OY GEVALT!!! What kind of goyishe michigas is this??? My bubbe (of beloved memory) just rolled over in her grave.

"Bagels" from KROGER? Oy vey. I think I'm going to plotz.



The CORRECT bagel is a bagel from a reputable Jewish baker known for making bagels. In SE Michigan, the Detroit Bagel Factory was an excellent example. Noah's is acceptable.

I love it - literally laughed out loud while sitting at my desk at work. Just gives my co-workers one more reason to think I am nuts (not that they need one).
Having worked for several years in Skokie, Il, I came to know a thing or two about bagels. My vote would be for onion with regular cream cheese.
That having been said, I have grown fond of Einstein Brothers when I visit a friend in the PHX area - and my favorite there is multi-grain with honey-walnut cream cheese schmeer along with a cup of their Neighborhood Blend coffee - the perfect breakfast

I would love to have REAL Jewish bagels. But, when everyone is goy, the best we can do is Safeway and Kroger......

A fresh poppy seed bagel lightly toasted with melted butter.

seb146 wrote:

I would love to have REAL Jewish bagels. But, when everyone is goy, the best we can do is Safeway and Kroger......

Einstein, Noah, come on, you must have a reputable bagel place around, fuh cryin' out loud!

Yeh killin' me. It'd be a schande if you didn't.

I like salt bagels, but they're nearly impossible to get. I haven't had one in over 15 years!

NIKV69 wrote:

seb146 wrote:

jalapeno and cheddar from Kroger/Fred Meyer with a schmeer of plain cream cheese

What in the name of GOD is that? Come to NY go to a real bagel place and get a cinnamon raisin with your schmeer. Much better. In fact my local place has homemade strawberry cream cheese. Total food porn.

Once many years ago, on a trip to New York City when first married, I stopped two New York city Policemen, and asked them where to find a Jewish Deli, they looked at me and said, we do not know, we just got transferred into this area. I have never forgotten that one.

DocLightning wrote:

seb146 wrote:

I would love to have REAL Jewish bagels. But, when everyone is goy, the best we can do is Safeway and Kroger......

Einstein, Noah, come on, you must have a reputable bagel place around, fuh cryin' out loud!

Yeh killin' me. It'd be a schande if you didn't.

If there is a Noah or Einstein, it would be a two hour drive to Eugene.

is a croissant
with a proper cup of coffee and not that American water coffee

...is an everything bagel, or plain bagel, purchased in NY, with a schmear of real cream cheese (as opposed to neufchatel), and maybe, if you're looking for protein, a slice of lox. Lightly toasting is optional, though discouraged if it's before noon. Yummers.

Now, some will put butter, American cheese and an egg on a bagel. This is the incorrect way to eat a bagel...butter...American cheese...or an egg. Those are best eaten on a simple kaiser roll along with a strong, black coffee.

Plain or poppy with a moderate amount of fresh butter, made from scratch on site, boiled then baked, lightly crunchy on the outside, chewy on the inside, and still warm from the oven. It cannot be a 'supermarket roll with a hole' likely made in some factory a 1000 miles away frozen then heated in the store.

Since any form of boiled bread is effing foul the correct bagel is the one never made.

fr8mech wrote:

...is an everything bagel, or plain bagel, purchased in NY, with a schmear of real cream cheese (as opposed to neufchatel), and maybe, if you're looking for protein, a slice of lox. Lightly toasting is optional, though discouraged if it's before noon. Yummers.

Now, some will put butter, American cheese and an egg on a bagel. This is the incorrect way to eat a bagel...butter...American cheese...or an egg. Those are best eaten on a simple kaiser roll along with a strong, black coffee.

I have to take issue with the egg thing. Though the proper egg sandwich in NY is on a kaiser roll putting it on a bagel is pretty good.

mad99 wrote:

is a croissant

Now that's chutzpah.

fr8mech wrote:

...is an everything bagel, or plain bagel, purchased in NY, with a schmear of real cream cheese (as opposed to neufchatel), and maybe, if you're looking for protein, a slice of lox. Lightly toasting is optional, though discouraged if it's before noon. Yummers.

I was right there with you until you got to the lox part. Substitute smoked turkey for lox and I'm back on board. Or just a plain everything bagel is fine by me as well.

fr8mech wrote:

Now, some will put butter, American cheese and an egg on a bagel. This is the incorrect way to eat a bagel...butter...American cheese...or an egg.

That's also just a slice of ham/Canadian bacon away from being a "McBagel".

fr8mech wrote:

Those (butter...American cheese...or an egg) are best eaten on a simple kaiser roll along with a strong, black coffee.

Or on a good ol' Southern biscuit.

Back to the bagel question, from far out in left field I'll suggest a blueberry bagel with pineapple cream cheese.

Today I learned that people are extremely picky about their bagels.

The correct round pastry is a donut.

trpmb6 wrote:

Today I learned that people are extremely picky about their bagels.

The correct round pastry is a donut.

No denying the correct round pastry is a doughnut (Not the correct pastry overall though, that's a pain-au-chocolat), but unless I'm wrong, a bagel is not a pastry.

trpmb6 wrote:

Today I learned that people are extremely picky about their bagels.

Oh this discussion isn't the half of it. People who are "into" bagels, culturally or otherwise, are fiercely loyal to their favorite deli/bakery on a Ford vs Chevy or Alabama vs Auburn level.

trpmb6 wrote:

The correct round pastry is a donut.

I gotta disagree with you there, buddy. The correct round pastry is a "Bama"-brand mini pecan pie.
(I actually liked their mini coconut custard pies even better, but either Bama no longer makes them or they were marketed by another brand I've since forgotten)

BlueberryWheats wrote:

trpmb6 wrote:

Today I learned that people are extremely picky about their bagels.

The correct round pastry is a donut.

No denying the correct round pastry is a doughnut (Not the correct pastry overall though, that's a pain-au-chocolat), but unless I'm wrong, a bagel is not a pastry.

I actually hadn't really given much thought into whether or not bagels are pastries, and indeed I believe you are correct, they are not a pastry.

This is beginning to cause me question my entire existence at this point.