caliboy93
Topic Author
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Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 7:24 pm

How easy/hard is it for an American to find a date abroad in places like Asia, Latin America, Africa? Does having an American passport and English fluency make you an attractive partner?
 
Jetty
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 7:47 pm

Really depends on the country and not the continent in my experience. I.e. Philippines, Brazil and Colombia yes, Thailand, Argentina and Chile not so much. That is talking about genuine woman, woman just looking for money are available at every tourist trap around the world.

It's not so much about having an American passport and speaking English but more about coming from a western country and being white. Speaking a bit of the local language would be a huge plus.
 
anrec80
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 8:12 pm

Generally - yes. When I go to Mexico, my Tinder just goes off the hook from likes and matches. I’d imagine it’s not hard to find company for a long a weekend or so pretty much anywhere outside of the USA.
 
SanDiegoLover
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 8:22 pm

Having lived abroad in several countries dating is vastly different, yet still a numbers game. Granted, I dated gay men, so that added another layer of complexity to the equation as many countries in South America and Asia aren’t as openly, gay friendly.

Some locals flat out won’t date you due to your race. Others will find you attractive simply for being an anomaly. Some will only sleep with you and refuse to get attached as they fear you leaving. Others see you as a meal ticket and an agent of freedom to get out of their country. Some guys wouldn’t date me because I’m circumcised. On a few occasions I felt like a sexual freak show in Asia because I’m a bit above average in size for a white American, but pornstar sized in Japan.

I guess what I’m getting at is that it’s probably just as easy to find dates, but more complex, therefore harder, to find a soulmate or long term significant other/spouse material.
 
TSS
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 10:34 pm

Excellent post by SanDiegoLover! If I may expand on it a bit...

SanDiegoLover wrote:
Some locals flat out won’t date you due to your race.


^ This. In the US we're obsessed with political correctness and love to flagellate ourselves over every fleeting thought that might be misconstrued as "racist". This is pretty much a Western thing and many countries, particularly Asian ones, are exactly the opposite in that they take great cultural pride in their racial purity and are ever vigilant in maintaining it.

SanDiegoLover wrote:
Others will find you attractive simply for being an anomaly. Some will only sleep with you and refuse to get attached as they fear you leaving.


Yep, in scouting terms they're just looking to get their "Boinked an American" (or simply "Boinked a White Guy", depending on your personal ethnic background and what country you're in) badge and move on. You're not a real person with feelings to them, you're just a checkmark on a list.

SanDiegoLover wrote:
Others see you as a meal ticket and an agent of freedom to get out of their country.


These are the ones you really, REALLY have to watch out for: All sunshine, smiles, and never a cross word while you're dating but the minute the ring goes on the finger the mask comes off and you find out who you actually married. BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID!

SanDiegoLover wrote:
Some guys wouldn’t date me because I’m circumcised.


Outside the US, the Middle East, South Korea, and assorted Muslim countries around the world, male circumcision is extremely rare and can be seen as a bit of a turn-off for prospective partners, much as the various types of female genital mutilation are seen as a bit of a turn-off in places where they are not a common practice.

SanDiegoLover wrote:
On a few occasions I felt like a sexual freak show in Asia because I’m a bit above average in size for a white American, but pornstar sized in Japan.


Although it's not PC to say so, some stereotypes are rooted in fact. That's not to say there aren't exceptions, but...
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Dutchy
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 11:20 pm

caliboy93 wrote:
Does having an American passport and English fluency make you an attractive partner?


You have to ask yourself if someone is interested in your American passport if you want to be with her? But that is me......

I have a Dutch passport - obviously - so also very attractive for the places you mentioned.
Many happy landings, greetings from The Netherlands!
 
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TWA772LR
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 11:36 pm

Australia. Get on Tinder and Bumble and go to Australia.
When wasn't America great?


The thoughts and opinions shared under this username are mine and are not influenced by my employer.
 
TSS
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sat Nov 30, 2019 11:47 pm

TWA772LR wrote:
Australia. Get on Tinder and Bumble and go to Australia.


Amen! They are a rowdy, raucous, fun-loving bunch down there. Any country that could produce and embrace an artist like Kevin "Bloody" Wilson gets my vote every time.
Able to kill active threads stone dead with a single post!
 
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seemyseems
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sun Dec 01, 2019 9:21 am

There is a show which might be of interest called 90 Day Fiancé. I caught part of an episode with a woman from GA engaged to a guy in Nigeria. Very interesting
seemyseems in ATL
 
Redd
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sun Dec 01, 2019 12:17 pm

caliboy93 wrote:
How easy/hard is it for an American to find a date abroad in places like Asia, Latin America, Africa? Does having an American passport and English fluency make you an attractive partner?


It makes you attractive for gold diggers ;) Women are not actually attracted to you unless you're an attractive person, no passport will change that. But if you're looking for 1-night adventures it'll help.
 
johns624
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sun Dec 01, 2019 1:46 pm

seemyseems wrote:
There is a show which might be of interest called 90 Day Fiancé. I caught part of an episode with a woman from GA engaged to a guy in Nigeria. Very interesting
Was he a prince?
 
dragon6172
Posts: 1078
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sun Dec 01, 2019 2:33 pm

johns624 wrote:
seemyseems wrote:
There is a show which might be of interest called 90 Day Fiancé. I caught part of an episode with a woman from GA engaged to a guy in Nigeria. Very interesting
Was he a prince?

Far from it. Some missing info is the lady from Georgia is close to 70 and her Nigerian fiance is in his 20s I believe.
Phrogs Phorever
 
johns624
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sun Dec 01, 2019 3:37 pm

The OP has started a thread in the past about not being able to get a date where he lives. If that is the case, I think it's advisable that things won't be any easier in a foreign country. Nobody is going to care that you are an American unless your citizenship is of use to them.
 
TSS
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Sun Dec 01, 2019 11:30 pm

johns624 wrote:
The OP has started a thread in the past about not being able to get a date where he lives. If that is the case, I think it's advisable that things won't be any easier in a foreign country. Nobody is going to care that you are an American unless your citizenship is of use to them.


Very true: If one is socially challenged at home where the rules of social engagement are well-known from a lifetime of exposure, one is certain to be even more socially challenged in an environment where different and unknown rules may apply. The possibility that there might be a language barrier in place as well only compounds the problem.

To the OP- Caliboy93, there are no easy shortcuts to socialization and relationships. There are, however, "Charm Schools" that teach socialization and etiquette skills, and a quick Google search brought up several in California, most in LA but a couple in NorCal as well. Unlike friends and family who will lie to your face by telling you "You're fine!" to save your feelings and then roll their eyes behind your back, a good charm school will point out exactly what you're doing wrong when interacting with people (bad/no eye contact, mumbling when speaking, using incomplete sentences, poor posture, fidgeting, bad overall body language, bad table manners, etc., etc.) and then give you the knowledge and training you need to make the best possible impression on everyone you meet including prospective partners. Consider it an investment in your future and, at the very least, you'll get to meet and interact with the other students at the charm school.
Able to kill active threads stone dead with a single post!
 
winginit
Posts: 2614
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 2:41 am

johns624 wrote:
The OP has started a thread in the past about not being able to get a date where he lives. If that is the case, I think it's advisable that things won't be any easier in a foreign country. Nobody is going to care that you are an American unless your citizenship is of use to them.


This.

If you find it difficult to find a date in your home country, it is likely that you will also struggle abroad - often more so given cultural and language barriers.

The exceptions to that rule should more often than not raise red flags.
 
Jetty
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 3:21 am

Redd wrote:
It makes you attractive for gold diggers ;) Women are not actually attracted to you unless you're an attractive person, no passport will change that. But if you're looking for 1-night adventures it'll help.

While this is certainly partially true, it is also true that in some countries a light skin is the beauty ideal. So yes, it can be that being a white westerner makes you attractive even to none gold diggers, but still unlikely if you're unattractive otherwise. Very culturally dependent on how acceptable it is to date foreigners though.
 
bennett123
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 7:27 am

My question to the OP.

Why would a US Passport be a factor.
 
B747forever
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 8:51 am

bennett123 wrote:
My question to the OP.

Why would a US Passport be a factor.


The same reason you have illegal immigration, people see a better future here. This is not limited to just the US, but holds true for any developed country.
Work Hard, Fly Right
 
mham001
Posts: 5639
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 5:49 pm

winginit wrote:
johns624 wrote:
The OP has started a thread in the past about not being able to get a date where he lives. If that is the case, I think it's advisable that things won't be any easier in a foreign country. Nobody is going to care that you are an American unless your citizenship is of use to them.


This.

If you find it difficult to find a date in your home country, it is likely that you will also struggle abroad - often more so given cultural and language barriers.

The exceptions to that rule should more often than not raise red flags.


I don't believe this at all. I get a lot more attention in Asia, which in turn initiates a lot more interaction. More interaction - more success. I can't speak for gays but women really dislike cheating husbands and I have been told several times that white men are considered more trustworthy in that regard. Some are also interested in that 'size' issue. Women are physiologically programmed to look for the best mate they can to provide for their offspring, so coming from a prosperous country will also naturally attract more interest.

It could be the OP is introverted and has trouble initiating contact. or maybe he really doesn't much care for the home-grown selection and his loneliness reflects that. Or he could indeed be an ugly gnome nobody will love but that is not our business here.

How were you able to master the two-post psychological evaluation?
 
bennett123
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 7:06 pm

B747forever

My point is why did bring up the point about a US Passport.

Making this his USP will only help him attract women who want a Green Card.
 
mham001
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 8:13 pm

bennett123 wrote:
B747forever

My point is why did bring up the point about a US Passport.

Making this his USP will only help him attract women who want a Green Card.


The US is still considered the Gold Standard for immigration. For somebody dating with long-term hopes of permanency, this matters.
 
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Aaron747
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 10:26 pm

mham001 wrote:
bennett123 wrote:
B747forever

My point is why did bring up the point about a US Passport.

Making this his USP will only help him attract women who want a Green Card.


The US is still considered the Gold Standard for immigration. For somebody dating with long-term hopes of permanency, this matters.


Previous post was hilarious dude :rotfl:

It is not the Gold Standard for people from developed countries. Dated my share during 7 years living in Japan and can tell you unequivocally that the passport-hunting Japanese and Korean ladies who want out prefer Australia and Canada if at all possible.
If you need someone to blame / throw a rock in the air / you'll hit someone guilty
 
Ken777
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 02, 2019 11:27 pm

It really depends what you want out dating someone. When. my ship went to Sydney on R&R I had one "sorta" date. I had joined up with a few Aussie Army guys and we all went to a club where I was able to relax - shortly a few lasses joined us for a few hours, but nothing came of it.

Next visit Down Under was to Perth and I was set up by the gal someone from the ship was dating. First night we went to the Kings Cross Restaurant (incredible view of the city) and had a good meal and a lot of great conversation. Both connected with ease - to the point where we had a final date before the ship left and headed back. She was able to start a 2 year overseas working holiday (Aussie gals do that a far more than the American gals) and I convinced her to travel through Long Beach. She actually agreed and never left the US. She arrived Jan 20th, we got engaged Feb 28th and married April. 5th. All in 1969 so we have passed the 50 year mark.

I believe it gets down to needing to be a decent person and relating well to the lady. It helps if you know a little bit about the country and respect the culture. Worked very well for me.
 
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Aaron747
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Tue Dec 03, 2019 12:01 am

Ken777 wrote:
It really depends what you want out dating someone. When. my ship went to Sydney on R&R I had one "sorta" date. I had joined up with a few Aussie Army guys and we all went to a club where I was able to relax - shortly a few lasses joined us for a few hours, but nothing came of it.

Next visit Down Under was to Perth and I was set up by the gal someone from the ship was dating. First night we went to the Kings Cross Restaurant (incredible view of the city) and had a good meal and a lot of great conversation. Both connected with ease - to the point where we had a final date before the ship left and headed back. She was able to start a 2 year overseas working holiday (Aussie gals do that a far more than the American gals) and I convinced her to travel through Long Beach. She actually agreed and never left the US. She arrived Jan 20th, we got engaged Feb 28th and married April. 5th. All in 1969 so we have passed the 50 year mark.

I believe it gets down to needing to be a decent person and relating well to the lady. It helps if you know a little bit about the country and respect the culture. Worked very well for me.


That’s a great story Ken! Glad everything worked out 1968-present.
If you need someone to blame / throw a rock in the air / you'll hit someone guilty
 
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Aesma
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Tue Dec 03, 2019 11:01 am

Redd wrote:
caliboy93 wrote:
How easy/hard is it for an American to find a date abroad in places like Asia, Latin America, Africa? Does having an American passport and English fluency make you an attractive partner?


It makes you attractive for gold diggers ;) Women are not actually attracted to you unless you're an attractive person, no passport will change that. But if you're looking for 1-night adventures it'll help.


Well, many people are in a relationship without being attractive, not all with gold diggers. Also, in other countries, some traits might be attractive that aren't in others. African men from some countries love "voluptuous" women for example.
New Technology is the name we give to stuff that doesn't work yet. Douglas Adams
 
Redd
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Tue Dec 03, 2019 2:19 pm

Aesma wrote:

Well, many people are in a relationship without being attractive, not all with gold diggers.


Maybe I should have clarified better when I wrote attractively. I didn't mean solely or predominately physically. What makes people attractive is rarely their physical appearance alone. I have known and met plenty of men who are good looking and handsome but get little to no interest from the opposite sex.

But attraction is the foundation of a sexual and intimate relationship. If there's no attraction then you just have a friend, so you have to be attractive for your mate.
 
AA747123
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Tue Dec 03, 2019 5:37 pm

Long term can be tough. I just got the boot from a gal in Europe, as the long time between visits was too much for her. It was not possible for her to come to me (school, work, pets), and I cant take a week off every 30 days like she wanted. So that was that. However, I did have some casual dates that lasted the time of my visit, stay in touch with a few here and there
 
Kiwirob
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Tue Dec 03, 2019 7:16 pm

seemyseems wrote:
There is a show which might be of interest called 90 Day Fiancé. I caught part of an episode with a woman from GA engaged to a guy in Nigeria. Very interesting


She was old fat and stupid and she cat-fished the guy.
 
Sokes
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 09, 2019 6:02 pm

SanDiegoLover wrote:
Some guys wouldn’t date me because I’m circumcised.


What's the difference for a homosexual sexual partner?
Why can't the world be a little bit more autistic?
 
SanDiegoLover
Posts: 204
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 09, 2019 6:33 pm

Sokes wrote:
SanDiegoLover wrote:
Some guys wouldn’t date me because I’m circumcised.


What's the difference for a homosexual sexual partner?


Not sure exactly what you’re asking? My point was that if you’re an American male you are quite likely to be circumcised (albeit it is trending downward) and the rest of the world is mainly uncircumcised, hence a deal breaker for some partners be they male or female.
 
Sokes
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Re: Americans dating abroad?

Mon Dec 09, 2019 6:41 pm

SanDiegoLover wrote:
Not sure exactly what you’re asking? My point was that if you’re an American male you are quite likely to be circumcised (albeit it is trending downward) and the rest of the world is mainly uncircumcised, hence a deal breaker for some partners be they male or female.


I myself am not sure what I'm asking. It sounds trivial to me. But then I find a lot of things trivial which people get upset about.
Why can't the world be a little bit more autistic?

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