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Cadet985
Topic Author
Posts: 2260
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2002 6:45 am

Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 1:55 am

With all that’s going on in the world this year, and in my life (sudden loss of my father), I’m feeling totally apathetic about EVERYTHING. Like I’ll vote in the election next week, but I don’t care about it like I usually do (or should).

Anyone else just feeling totally apathetic when it comes to everything?

I mean aside from the apathy, there’s definite depression. I’m gonna be alone for the holidays, and I am NOT looking forward to that.

Marc
 
Kno
Posts: 613
Joined: Mon Aug 15, 2016 10:08 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 2:35 am

I’m sorry you’re going through a period of loss and apathy - just know that it’s part of life and we all experience it. You’re not alone, and when you’re down sometimes the best you can do is just push through and better times will find you.
 
NIKV69
Posts: 14382
Joined: Wed Jan 28, 2004 4:27 am

Re: Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 2:56 am

Sorry on the loss of your father and yes I am feeling slightly apathetic. It is the Covid fatigue factor. Having to cut back on going to certain places etc.
90 Day Fiancé has taught me that Russian woman are excellent.
 
cpd
Posts: 6787
Joined: Sat Jun 28, 2008 4:46 am

Re: Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 3:30 am

Cadet985 wrote:
With all that’s going on in the world this year, and in my life (sudden loss of my father), I’m feeling totally apathetic about EVERYTHING. Like I’ll vote in the election next week, but I don’t care about it like I usually do (or should).

Anyone else just feeling totally apathetic when it comes to everything?

I mean aside from the apathy, there’s definite depression. I’m gonna be alone for the holidays, and I am NOT looking forward to that.

Marc


The world has changed permanently and with your loss - this is normal, people go through that. You can't be a super-hero all the time, nobody can. Regardless of our situation - we all hit these points and some time or another.

I don't know about in your country, but here we have support organisations in place that you can ring up when you are going through tough times to get help.

Many people I know deal with this through exercise. That helps a lot. I hope you can find your way through this and don't be afraid to reach out if/when you need help.
 
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einsteinboricua
Posts: 8703
Joined: Thu Apr 15, 2010 4:11 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 3:37 am

I just switched jobs, and I took a week off before starting...I also felt apathetic. Covid, a big life change (gotta move yet again), and questioning if I'm truly happy with how life is or whether I need something else to spark interest...you're definitely not alone.
"You haven't seen a tree until you've seen its shadow from the sky."
 
Sokes
Posts: 2773
Joined: Sat Mar 09, 2019 4:48 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 9:57 am

I'm sorry for your loss.
What do you normally enjoy?
Try to go for daily walks.
Why can't the world be a little bit more autistic?
 
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casinterest
Posts: 13797
Joined: Sat Feb 12, 2005 5:30 am

Re: Total Apathy

Tue Oct 27, 2020 1:38 pm

Fill the void with something productive.
Walk, new exercise class , Bike.

Consume the empty with something new. You might not care for now, but maybe a change of perspective and DTD operation will help change that.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did..So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.--Mark Twain
 
Cadet985
Topic Author
Posts: 2260
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2002 6:45 am

Re: Total Apathy

Wed Oct 28, 2020 1:24 am

I’m a debt collector. I make 200-300 calls a day to try to get some money. My goal (set by my boss) was $11,500 for October. I’m not even 1/10 of the way there. I come home from work scared to death that I’m going to lose this job, not be able to find another one, and lose my house. I’m on heavy sleeping meds, yet averaging 6-7 hours of mediocre sleep, at best according to my watch.
 
andz
Posts: 7780
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2004 7:49 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Wed Oct 28, 2020 4:02 pm

In the last year I have lost both my parents (2 weeks apart), my job in December 2019, my wife lost her job in August this year, it can seem too much in a short time.

To stop my mind turning to mush I started learning French on Duolingo between job searches, I started Italian as well for a planned holiday that didn't materialise due to Covid. I also used it to brush up on my German.

I am now on 209 consecutive days language learning and today I had the first real job interview all year that will lead to a second interview.

Hang in there.
After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says WTF...
 
Sokes
Posts: 2773
Joined: Sat Mar 09, 2019 4:48 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Nov 01, 2020 12:53 am

Cadet985 wrote:
I’m a debt collector. I make 200-300 calls a day to try to get some money. My goal (set by my boss) was $11,500 for October. I’m not even 1/10 of the way there. I come home from work scared to death that I’m going to lose this job, not be able to find another one, and lose my house. I’m on heavy sleeping meds, yet averaging 6-7 hours of mediocre sleep, at best according to my watch.

I think worse than the death of your father are the existential worries and the loneliness.
Start sport. Sport releases endorphins.
https://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/ ... 20morphine.
I like bicycle, but swimming and jogging are also good. It may take you six weeks or so to build up muscle and reach a good fitness, at any rate compared to your today's fitness.

A sad person has problems to find a partner. Somebody in a happy relationship looks happy and gets chances when not needed. Sport should make you look happier.

In case you loose your job, you will be mentally much better equiped. Stress is caused by a multitude of factors, lack of sport being one of them.

Also, as somebody else already pointed out, find yourself some interest.

Joy comes by activity. Our society focuses on possessions, but few things are as enjoyable than walking three days in winter next to a camel through desert/ half desert or a bicycle tour.

A long journey starts with a single step.
Why can't the world be a little bit more autistic?
 
Newark727
Posts: 2461
Joined: Tue Dec 29, 2009 6:42 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Nov 01, 2020 4:52 am

Don't be afraid to get help if you need it. Depression is a serious illness.
 
M564038
Posts: 650
Joined: Sun Jan 03, 2016 11:16 am

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Nov 01, 2020 9:26 am

I think it is important to know that most people go through several rough patches in life. It is a very usual occurence, and you are not alone about it.
Don’t be afraid to seek professional help, all kinds of people do this all the time.
Had this pandemic lock-down thing struck about 10 years ago, I would have been very lonely, very out-of-work and broke and very depressed.
It would have passed eventually, but it would have been rough.
I have been very lucky with the timing of this, everything is on a uptick for me personally, and my life is by chance «rigged» to almost get the better out of this situation, both financially and socially (family, baby, homeoffice plus paternity leave)but at the same time that is pure luck, and it feels like I dodged a bullet.

So what I am saying is it could have been me, I got lucky this time, next time the roles could be reversed. That is life. This is not the predetermined condition and nothing is static. The older generation gradually disapears and times goes by. But, We do have a built in rescillience, circumstances change gradually, we mature, we get lucky now and then, depressions pass, opportunities do come along and there is always bright spots ahead even if you can’t see them.
 
Cadet985
Topic Author
Posts: 2260
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2002 6:45 am

Re: Total Apathy

Sat Nov 07, 2020 2:12 am

I mean I’m smoking and drinking a lot more.

And I just got my hours cut at work. Went from working 5 days a week to two. Applying for other jobs, but just got rejected from one today...less than three hours after the phone interview.
 
Max Q
Posts: 9049
Joined: Wed May 09, 2001 12:40 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Sat Nov 07, 2020 4:27 am

Cadet985 wrote:
With all that’s going on in the world this year, and in my life (sudden loss of my father), I’m feeling totally apathetic about EVERYTHING. Like I’ll vote in the election next week, but I don’t care about it like I usually do (or should).

Anyone else just feeling totally apathetic when it comes to everything?

I mean aside from the apathy, there’s definite depression. I’m gonna be alone for the holidays, and I am NOT looking forward to that.

Marc



Heartfelt condolences on your loss


Grief will do that to you, I’m going through it myself and completely understand the apathy


I know there’s not much I can say but don’t lose hope and try to stay occupied


Slowly things will improve, they won’t be the same but they will get better
The best contribution to safety is a competent Pilot.


GGg
 
Cadet985
Topic Author
Posts: 2260
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2002 6:45 am

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Mar 07, 2021 6:34 am

Just a quick update. I’m working...a job that I totally hate...no positive aspect to it. I still give it my all. I’m as depressed as ever and couldn’t have a worse outlook on life. I’m smoking a lot more, drinking more, and feeling more alone and isolated than ever.
 
Tiredofhumanity
Posts: 168
Joined: Sat Sep 19, 2020 9:27 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Mar 07, 2021 6:45 am

Cadet985 wrote:
Just a quick update. I’m working...a job that I totally hate...no positive aspect to it. I still give it my all. I’m as depressed as ever and couldn’t have a worse outlook on life. I’m smoking a lot more, drinking more, and feeling more alone and isolated than ever.


I hear you bud... I haven't bought a 1.75 L handle of liquor since I was 21, and I'll be 32 in a few months...

We're living in historically shitty times, but keep in mind our ancestors had to go through much of the same and still came out of it (two world wars, Spanish Flu pandemic, etc...).

May I suggest dropping cable and avoiding the 24 hour "news" cycle? Same with social media.

EDIT - not sure what generation you're in, but if you're a Millennial keep in mind most if the doom articles you may be reading are written by other Millennials. This is the first time we've really been tested as a generation aside from the 2008 recession - the perspective of their ancestors are completely left out, and most of these articles are purposely designed to generate more ad revenue for Mercedes-driving ad agency pricks in NYC and LA anyway. In America, only money matters..
 
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stl07
Posts: 2895
Joined: Mon May 01, 2017 8:57 pm

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Mar 07, 2021 8:00 am

go on a run
Instead of typing in "mods", consider using the report function.
Love how every "travel blogger" says they will never fly AA/Ethihad again and then says it again and again on subsequent flights.
 
bennett123
Posts: 10861
Joined: Sun Aug 15, 2004 12:49 am

Re: Total Apathy

Sun Mar 07, 2021 11:32 am

IMO, there are two issues there, bereavement and COVID.

In my industry, (financial services) it is perfectly normal, (even pre COVID) to regard potential investors as potentially vulnerable up to 6 months after a bereavement. The advisor was required to ask the potential investor if they felt ready and suggest that the investor be accompanied by a friend or family member at the advice meeting.

You then have the impact of COVID, including the uncertainty about your job and home. This on it's own is worrying for anyone who does not have substancial savings, (i.e. most of us). Then add in the stress caused by lack of social contact. Again this is very stressful without any additional factors.

You my friend have been hit by a perfect storm. If you were running around full of the joys of spring, this would be a danger sign.

I don't know if professional support is needed. However, if you feel that it might help you should not hesitate to seek it out. These are not normal times.

Let's all focus on a future which will be brighter than the last 12 months.
 
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Pellegrine
Posts: 2670
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2007 10:19 am

Re: Total Apathy

Mon Mar 08, 2021 3:06 am

Give yourself a break. You're in one of the stages of grief. Honestly.
We fly JETS, we don't fly donkeys. Citizenship/Residence::: Washington DC, US; Vaud, CH; Providenciales, TCI (hence my avi)
 
cpd
Posts: 6787
Joined: Sat Jun 28, 2008 4:46 am

Re: Total Apathy

Mon Mar 08, 2021 3:57 am

Cadet985 wrote:
With all that’s going on in the world this year, and in my life (sudden loss of my father), I’m feeling totally apathetic about EVERYTHING. Like I’ll vote in the election next week, but I don’t care about it like I usually do (or should).

Anyone else just feeling totally apathetic when it comes to everything?

I mean aside from the apathy, there’s definite depression. I’m gonna be alone for the holidays, and I am NOT looking forward to that.

Marc


It's normal - you've gone through the loss of someone and then there is COVID which has turned everything upside down.

You are not some super hero, you are a normal person and normal people get affected by these things to varying amounts because that's just how we are. What we can do is reach our to others.

What you need is an outlet, something to keep you occupied and positive - for me it's exercise.

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