Moderators: richierich, ua900, PanAm_DC10, hOMSaR
Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
My friend and I are always amused by, and are therefore on the lookout for, words and phrases that seem to be in the domain of the airline industry. Some of them are funny: ex: "can I price that out for you, sir?" , "please move clear of THAT central aisle" (as opposed to the four other central aisles in the plane?), "please STOW your baggage under the seat in front of you", "there is an EQUIPMENT change for today's flight"...
Does anyone have any other funnier ones?
-
- WesternA318
- Posts: 4644
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
I heard this on the phone last night. "Let's just marry the two routings and see what fare we can come up with..." Bless you CO! 
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
Not sure if this counts, but the line "your seat cushion MAY be used as a flotation device" always gets me. So, is it hit or miss? Row 20 is not equipped with seat cushions as flotation devices or something?
also "All standbys have been cleared" Can't they just say "the flight is now full"?
I think they get looks often if they refer to the gates in aviation terms...never heard it, myself, but I know that they do it sometimes...for example "we are now boarding flight XXX at gate Alpha 6" One time it is not confusing is when a Delta flight leaves out of a D gate..."We are now boarding flight XXX to Atlanta at gate Delta 6"
also "All standbys have been cleared" Can't they just say "the flight is now full"?
I think they get looks often if they refer to the gates in aviation terms...never heard it, myself, but I know that they do it sometimes...for example "we are now boarding flight XXX at gate Alpha 6" One time it is not confusing is when a Delta flight leaves out of a D gate..."We are now boarding flight XXX to Atlanta at gate Delta 6"
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"If cabin pressure ever changes"
Sounds like a promise from a lover "If I ever change, oxygen masks will deploy"...I think they coulda saved the ever part...most people get the idea.
DeltaGuy
Sounds like a promise from a lover "If I ever change, oxygen masks will deploy"...I think they coulda saved the ever part...most people get the idea.
DeltaGuy
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"If cabin pressure ever changes"
Most times I hear "Should Cabin Pressure Change"
Most times I hear "Should Cabin Pressure Change"
-
- WesternA318
- Posts: 4644
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"..."We are now boarding flight XXX to Atlanta at gate Delta 6"
lol, I know what you mean, Flairport, out her ein SLC< Delta has the D concourse (along with the C and some of the B Concourses).
lol, I know what you mean, Flairport, out her ein SLC< Delta has the D concourse (along with the C and some of the B Concourses).
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
How about "arnk". If you ever have a canceled/delayed flight(s), the agent has to put in new flights with the term "arnk" or arrival unknown.
Don't you want to know where you are arriving?
XJR
Don't you want to know where you are arriving?
XJR
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
I can't sit through a safety announcement without laughing from a "Tommy Boy" flashback when they get to the part about how to buckle a seatbelt...
Some of the lingo is amusing and annoying at the same time, like "deplane", which is funny if you say it in a Tattoo accent and throw in "boss" at the end.
But I have to admit that the word "stow" gets on my nerves. Normal people just do not say "stow", ever. I don't "stow" the groceries when I get home, nor do I "stow" the lanudry. Let's lose the nautical pretentions, okay?
Some of the lingo is amusing and annoying at the same time, like "deplane", which is funny if you say it in a Tattoo accent and throw in "boss" at the end.
But I have to admit that the word "stow" gets on my nerves. Normal people just do not say "stow", ever. I don't "stow" the groceries when I get home, nor do I "stow" the lanudry. Let's lose the nautical pretentions, okay?
-
- fanoftristars
- Posts: 1777
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
I love how some airlines still trumpet their "non-stop" service to XXX on board.
"Welcome Aboard DL FL XXX with Non-Stop 737-300 Jet Service SLC-RNO"
God, I hope it's non-stop service! We'd better not stop in Winnemucca on the way!"
"Welcome Aboard DL FL XXX with Non-Stop 737-300 Jet Service SLC-RNO"
God, I hope it's non-stop service! We'd better not stop in Winnemucca on the way!"
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
I enjoy it when airlines use terms such as, we offer alcoholic beverages at an ECONOMICAL fee of 5$Canadian.
And then go on to say how "we offer headsets at a NOMINAL fee of 3$"
And then go on to say how "we offer headsets at a NOMINAL fee of 3$"
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
For years the "standard" Delta arrival speech ended with, "Thank you and good day."
Who on EARTH says, "Good day?" Were they aiming for an Australian "G'Day?"
My other favorite word is "service items," as in "We will be collecting all remaining service items..."
Who on EARTH says, "Good day?" Were they aiming for an Australian "G'Day?"
My other favorite word is "service items," as in "We will be collecting all remaining service items..."
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
Adria Airways FAs keep repeating "Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. This is Adria Airways flight XXX to YYY" while boarding is still in progress. As if they were trying to say that anyone who might be on the wrong plane can still get out. 
They also have this on scheduled flights:" Adria Airways only offers alcoholic drinks for purchase" and on charter flights they say:"Since this is a charter flight, you can only get non-alcoholic beverages for free. But you are still welcome to purchase alcoholic drinks".
They also have this on scheduled flights:" Adria Airways only offers alcoholic drinks for purchase" and on charter flights they say:"Since this is a charter flight, you can only get non-alcoholic beverages for free. But you are still welcome to purchase alcoholic drinks".
-
- WesternA318
- Posts: 4644
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"We will be collecting all remaining service items..."
LOL, on some carriers that say this, my reply would be....
WHAT SERVICE!??
LOL, on some carriers that say this, my reply would be....
WHAT SERVICE!??
-
- hawaiian717
- Posts: 3723
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
XJRamper wrote:
How about "arnk". If you ever have a canceled/delayed flight(s), the agent has to put in new flights with the term "arnk" or arrival unknown.
I've seen ARNK used for open jaws. If my ticket has an SFO-ATL segment, then an MCO-SFO segment, there will be a segment in between that is ARNK. I guess this is so the system knows you didn't omit a segment.
ARNK isn't needed if you have a rental car booked in the same reservation, pick up at ATL and drop off at MCO. Then the system (Apollo at least) can account for that "missing" flight segment.
ARNK also isn't usually needed for airports that are considered the same "destination". If I book SFO-EWR and my return is JFK-SFO, I wouldn't need an ARNK, since both are considered "New York".
David / MRY
How about "arnk". If you ever have a canceled/delayed flight(s), the agent has to put in new flights with the term "arnk" or arrival unknown.
I've seen ARNK used for open jaws. If my ticket has an SFO-ATL segment, then an MCO-SFO segment, there will be a segment in between that is ARNK. I guess this is so the system knows you didn't omit a segment.
ARNK isn't needed if you have a rental car booked in the same reservation, pick up at ATL and drop off at MCO. Then the system (Apollo at least) can account for that "missing" flight segment.
ARNK also isn't usually needed for airports that are considered the same "destination". If I book SFO-EWR and my return is JFK-SFO, I wouldn't need an ARNK, since both are considered "New York".
David / MRY
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
Korean Air had once...
Now the first daily NON STOP round trip flight from Seoul and LAX
Now the first daily NON STOP round trip flight from Seoul and LAX
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
Oh... I remember another one:
"You must be able to see the exit, here instructions, understand commands, and direct others to the exit without blocking the exit, causing harm to yourself or others, and WITHOUT BEING DISTRACTED BY OTHER ATTENTIONS."
I don't think I've ever heard of "attention" referred to in the plural. But I certainly fancy the idea that a massenger might be completely sidetracked by something far more urgent than a blazing cabin fire. ("Screw the evacuation, I'm going to flip through this SkyMall catalogue RIGHT NOW.")
"You must be able to see the exit, here instructions, understand commands, and direct others to the exit without blocking the exit, causing harm to yourself or others, and WITHOUT BEING DISTRACTED BY OTHER ATTENTIONS."
I don't think I've ever heard of "attention" referred to in the plural. But I certainly fancy the idea that a massenger might be completely sidetracked by something far more urgent than a blazing cabin fire. ("Screw the evacuation, I'm going to flip through this SkyMall catalogue RIGHT NOW.")
-
- premobrimo
- Posts: 286
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
My favorite one......
"Please use caution when opening overhead bins, items may have shifted during flight"
"Please use caution when opening overhead bins, items may have shifted during flight"
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
Personally, I love it how they try and make the proposition of crashing into the ocean seem a little less dangerous by saying:
"In the event of a water landing... blah blah."
Of course this is accompanied by the safety card picture of the aircraft, completely in-tact,floating happily along in calm seas while the passengers exit at their leisure.
Cheers - Skytrain.
"In the event of a water landing... blah blah."
Of course this is accompanied by the safety card picture of the aircraft, completely in-tact,floating happily along in calm seas while the passengers exit at their leisure.
Cheers - Skytrain.
-
- pizzaandplanes
- Posts: 343
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"if in the event of a cabin pressure drop pull the mask over your head blah blah blah.....................you will not need to know this information because they are broke, but that's ok because we will not be flying high enough"
Heard that on a pan am airways flight out of Trenton, NJ
Heard that on a pan am airways flight out of Trenton, NJ
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"In the unlikely event of a water landing..." Sorry, but if we're setting down on anything other than a runway, that's not a "landing", that's a "crash."
I did hear a more honest version once on a Skywest flight from LAS to FAT: "In the unlikely event that the captain actually managed to find a body of water between Vegas and Fresno big enough to put this plane in, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. Pull it up, check under it for loose change, then put your hands through the straps as you exit the plane. Of course, if the door winds up at the shallow end of the pool, just walk out, okay?"
I did hear a more honest version once on a Skywest flight from LAS to FAT: "In the unlikely event that the captain actually managed to find a body of water between Vegas and Fresno big enough to put this plane in, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. Pull it up, check under it for loose change, then put your hands through the straps as you exit the plane. Of course, if the door winds up at the shallow end of the pool, just walk out, okay?"
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"Welcome Aboard DL FL XXX with Non-Stop 737-300 Jet Service SLC-RNO"
Glad to know it's a 737-300 JET! I was afraid I'd be stuck on a prop!
"Please use caution when opening overhead bins, items may have shifted during flight"
I faintly remember during takeoff once, the overhead bins popped open and the luggage almost fell out...FAs were popping the bins into place during takeoff roll...I also remember once on a 763 the movie screen fell down while taking off!
"if in the event of a cabin pressure drop pull the mask over your head blah blah blah.....................you will not need to know this information because they are broke, but that's ok because we will not be flying high enough"
Heard that on a pan am airways flight out of Trenton, NJ
That sums up Pan Am 3 for ya!
"Hear instructions, open the exit"
Hell, I'd skip the instructions and just open the exit
I think DL's old safety info gets the cake:
"At this time flight attendants will be picking up cups and glasses and must remain seated for the remainder of taxi and takeoff!"
Cups AND galsses! Even in the good ole' days it was either or!
Glad to know it's a 737-300 JET! I was afraid I'd be stuck on a prop!
"Please use caution when opening overhead bins, items may have shifted during flight"
I faintly remember during takeoff once, the overhead bins popped open and the luggage almost fell out...FAs were popping the bins into place during takeoff roll...I also remember once on a 763 the movie screen fell down while taking off!
"if in the event of a cabin pressure drop pull the mask over your head blah blah blah.....................you will not need to know this information because they are broke, but that's ok because we will not be flying high enough"
Heard that on a pan am airways flight out of Trenton, NJ
That sums up Pan Am 3 for ya!
"Hear instructions, open the exit"
Hell, I'd skip the instructions and just open the exit
I think DL's old safety info gets the cake:
"At this time flight attendants will be picking up cups and glasses and must remain seated for the remainder of taxi and takeoff!"
Cups AND galsses! Even in the good ole' days it was either or!
-
- clipperno1
- Posts: 641
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
I just boarded the BA flight BWI-LHR, when the cpt. came on and said that we had a tech problem, but that the engineers of BA were working on it.
I don't know, but that always gives me the impression (probably that's what BA wants. duh!) that there is a bunch of tie-wearing guys who earned their engineering-degree after numerous years at the university, running around the airplane, getting out original blue-prints of the plane to solve the problem. If they can't solve the problems, they will just build a new plane within 2 hours to get us going.
No dis-respect to the mx-guys intended! Great guys, probably better skilled than most "university drop-outs" and I feel actually safer thinking that guys like Joe Patroni from the original Airport movie are working on the plane.
I don't know, but that always gives me the impression (probably that's what BA wants. duh!) that there is a bunch of tie-wearing guys who earned their engineering-degree after numerous years at the university, running around the airplane, getting out original blue-prints of the plane to solve the problem. If they can't solve the problems, they will just build a new plane within 2 hours to get us going.
No dis-respect to the mx-guys intended! Great guys, probably better skilled than most "university drop-outs" and I feel actually safer thinking that guys like Joe Patroni from the original Airport movie are working on the plane.
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
In the unlikely event of a water landing.....
As Eddie Izzard once said...
"Hmm. Middle of the Atlantic. Bobbing up and down. 2000 miles to Ireland. 1000 to the US. You've got your whistle...
"
Salso
Adria Airways FAs keep repeating "Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. This is Adria Airways flight XXX to YYY" while boarding is still in progress. As if they were trying to say that anyone who might be on the wrong plane can still get out.
I still hear UA doing that on many flights. "Destination check..."
ExFATBoy
I did hear a more honest version once on a Skywest flight from LAS to FAT: "In the unlikely event that the captain actually managed to find a body of water between Vegas and Fresno big enough to put this plane in, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. Pull it up, check under it for loose change, then put your hands through the straps as you exit the plane. Of course, if the door winds up at the shallow end of the pool, just walk out, okay?"
Thats brilliant! ROFL.
Mark
Mark
As Eddie Izzard once said...
"Hmm. Middle of the Atlantic. Bobbing up and down. 2000 miles to Ireland. 1000 to the US. You've got your whistle...
"
Salso
Adria Airways FAs keep repeating "Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. This is Adria Airways flight XXX to YYY" while boarding is still in progress. As if they were trying to say that anyone who might be on the wrong plane can still get out.
I still hear UA doing that on many flights. "Destination check..."
ExFATBoy
I did hear a more honest version once on a Skywest flight from LAS to FAT: "In the unlikely event that the captain actually managed to find a body of water between Vegas and Fresno big enough to put this plane in, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. Pull it up, check under it for loose change, then put your hands through the straps as you exit the plane. Of course, if the door winds up at the shallow end of the pool, just walk out, okay?"
Thats brilliant! ROFL.
Mark
Mark
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
This one is not heard much anymore, but a common announcement as a plane reached the gate was:
“Please observe the no smoking signs until inside the terminal.”
Exactly how is it possible to continue the observe (see) those little indicators on the plane while you are walking up the jetway? Perhaps a series of mirrors?
“Please observe the no smoking signs until inside the terminal.”
Exactly how is it possible to continue the observe (see) those little indicators on the plane while you are walking up the jetway? Perhaps a series of mirrors?
-
- BAViscount
- Posts: 1977
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"Place the mask over your nose and mouth and secure it with the elastic band. Breathe normally."
Yeah right, like that's gonna happen.
[Edited 2005-01-02 20:40:55]
Yeah right, like that's gonna happen.
[Edited 2005-01-02 20:40:55]
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
"Place the mask over your nose and mouth and secure it with the elastic band. Breathe normally."
as oppesed to what kind of breathing?through your ass?
i always love the announcement in the AF safety videos
"please do not smoke in the toilets"
gives the impression of literly being in the damn thing
as oppesed to what kind of breathing?through your ass?
i always love the announcement in the AF safety videos
"please do not smoke in the toilets"
gives the impression of literly being in the damn thing
-
- futureualpilot
- Posts: 2406
- Joined:
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
George Carlin did a great sketch on the many phrases heard in air travel that I heard a while back, I wish I could remember more but heres a few of them:
"Please bring all items you may have brought on board with you."
His response was something like, MAY have brought!? Well I just MIGHT have taken my luggage, but I didnt!
"Your seat cushion may be used as a floatation device"
Yeah, thats just what I want to do, float around the Atlantic in somebody else's month old beer farts...
[Edited 2005-01-03 03:30:57]
"Please bring all items you may have brought on board with you."
His response was something like, MAY have brought!? Well I just MIGHT have taken my luggage, but I didnt!
"Your seat cushion may be used as a floatation device"
Yeah, thats just what I want to do, float around the Atlantic in somebody else's month old beer farts...
[Edited 2005-01-03 03:30:57]
RE: Amusing Airline/Travel Lingo
I don't know if other airlines do this, but CO's boarding announcments at EWR make me nuts with the following line:
"We are now boarding flight XXXX to YYY through the door marked ZZ."
What is with this "door marked" phrase? Have you ever heard anyone in your life refer a numbered door as the "door marked X"? Why can't they just say "at Gate ZZ" instead? Maybe one of our CO employees here can clarify this...come on Falcon84, you're a CSA in CLE, you would know.
"We are now boarding flight XXXX to YYY through the door marked ZZ."
What is with this "door marked" phrase? Have you ever heard anyone in your life refer a numbered door as the "door marked X"? Why can't they just say "at Gate ZZ" instead? Maybe one of our CO employees here can clarify this...come on Falcon84, you're a CSA in CLE, you would know.
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: BAe146 and 33 guests