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sadboy350
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Joined: Tue Aug 21, 2018 8:37 pm

I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:40 am

I hate to even write this and writing this makes me burst into tears. Due to an intense epilepsy I can't be a commercial pilot. The disease was found a 2 months ago. Since then, my life has lost its purpose. I was living and breathing aviation. I had been searching for my passion all my life and found it when I was 12 - aviation. I know it was it, I had never been so passionate about anything. Now I am 19 and all of it is gone. I devoted all my life for my dream of becoming a commercial pilot. I became a nerd in maths and physics, took up sports, I was all set to become a pilot. I was known as the crazy plane boy in my college and I didn't even look at girls since all I thought about was planes, aviation and my dream! It was the sole purpose of my life! And then suddenly - I started getting those really bad seizures. Then diagnosed with epilepsy.

The worst part is now that I have lost ALL my love in aviation. I have tried some spotting, went on a trip, but it's not the same. It just isn't. Planes are just a reminder of a dream never to become true. Now when I see a plane, I feel anger. At the moment I can't even consider a career elsewhere in aviation even though my parents keep me telling to do so. The whole damn passion has just betrayed me. I have tried to read articles about aviation, watch photos of planes, just force myself to like it. But I can't. The fact that all of it is gone now tears me apart every second. There's nothing that I have loved more in the world than aviation, but I just can't take it anymore! In addition, my identity is gone now, too. I am just a depressed, frustrated boy who's interested in NOTHING. What can I do anymore? Aviation was the only thing in my life I didn't have to force myself to like. (unless now.) Other things - football, video games, cars - were just something I liked because everyone else did too.

I have never been this lost in my life.
 
Max Q
Posts: 9066
Joined: Wed May 09, 2001 12:40 pm

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 10:24 am

Please don’t despair


While things may look very dark for you right now that will change


It’s very important to remember as well that this problem was completely out of your control, you have not ‘failed’ at anything, it’s just one of those unfortunate things that happen to people



Time will make things look a lot better I promise you


It’s also perfectly natural for you to have lost your interest in aviation but this is temporary, I know you feel like if you can’t fly the aircraft yourself you’re not interested but that will change


Your enthusiasm for aviation will return, you can enjoy it from many different aspects



If you’re wondering how I know these things it’s because I lost my medical certification to fly some time ago after a 30 year career


I was at the top of my profession as a 767 Captain Flying around the world, then a medical condition hit me out of the blue that could not be resolved



I was devastated and lost any interest in aviation for a long time


My life will never be the same as I’m no longer an active pilot but my enthusiasm for aviation has come back


I am genuinely sorry about your situation and couldn’t empathize more but don’t give up on life



Turn to your family and friends, try not to obsess over what you can’t control, stay busy and do something you enjoy and time will
make this a lot easier


You are still young, try lots of different things and you’ll find something(s) you enjoy doing


Best wishes
 
gtae07
Posts: 85
Joined: Thu Jun 16, 2016 8:41 pm

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 10:44 am

Sorry to hear about that... but as MaxQ puts it, all hope is not lost. A career in aviation is still certainly possible (engineering, maintenance, etc.) and even though the FAA will probably never sign off on a medical for you, there are a couple of options still open to fly. Flying with another pilot is always an option, and both gliders and ultralights require no medical certificate--they may be options if you can get your seizures controlled.

On a more personal note, my wife was diagnosed with epilepsy (partial-complex) at 19 as well, shortly after we started dating. Hers was controlled for several years before getting worse. But eventually, on the advice of others with epilepsy and a random doctor we ran into at a wedding, she went to Emory in Atlanta. They have many treatment options that may be an option for you, depending on your seizures. She was actually determined to be a surgery candidate and had her surgery this past April. Four months later and no seizures yet; we're in sight of her being able to drive again. If you can, seek out treatment at a top hopital like Emory or Cleveland Clinic...
 
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wiggy
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:14 am

don't worry its all good mate
 
BlueberryWheats
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:27 am

I know the feeling. Growing up I was an absolute aviation nut. I went through school choosing my studies etc to try and go down the path of commercial pilot, but I couldn't afford training unless it was through a cadet scheme.

Unfortunately I ended up growing too tall to be accepted! Or so I was told. I'm 6'5", I've seen plenty of tall pilots but not sure if any reach my height. I always wanted a commercial flying career, but as a last resort I approached the RAF. Same story. The recruitment officer even said "if someone your height had to eject, they'd lose their legs." I wasn't interested in the fast jets, I would happily fly the C-17 or E-3, but it made no difference.

Ah well. I was devastated, but don't despair, I ended up falling into a job in the medical profession and love it. I'm on my way to carving out a decent career out of it. You too may well find another potential career that you will love.
 
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trpmb6
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 1:29 pm

sadboy350 wrote:
I can't be a commercial pilot.


I too was quite upset when I discovered I couldn't be a pilot (of the military sort) due to health reasons.

I was inspired by an uncle of mine to go to an engineering school. I've been an aerospace engineer working on aircraft (and spacecraft) for some time now. In a way, I feel more rewarded because I can influence the design of an eventual end product. I may not be able to fly it but I know the work I do will go on to affect millions. Many people on these forums have no idea who I am outside of this user id. But they've flown on products I've helped design. And that's pretty cool to think about sometimes. (Also gives some weight to what I do - and why I do it.)
 
KCharlie
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 3:12 pm

Like the guy above, I went the engineering route. Now I have no desire to be pilot. I've had a huge hand in desiging very recognizable aerodynamic surfaces on aircraft that millions of people fly on. I get to flight test my work. As an aerospace engineer, you get a much deeper understanding of flight and aircraft - far more than a pilot ever will.

If you did well in school, consider engineering.
 
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Gonzalo
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 3:33 pm

Sadboy, I know it’s a cliche, but things will improve. I never had the bad luck of being depressed at the point you apparently are now. But with almost 45 years I can tell you , I had my bad days/weeks/months for sure. Sometimes all you want to do in those days is stay in bed, sleep, smoke, drink beer and sleep again. But the sun always shine again sooner or later. Think in all the people who loves you, and think that life, with or without epilepsy, is a blessing and a gift you can enjoy. Don’t give up, and I bet my arms you will be creating a different username in the future, is just a matter of time.

All the best for you my friend.
Rgds.
G.
 
jetmatt777
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 5:07 pm

It sucks, but you will get past it if you allow yourself. I had the same aspirations which were crushed by a medical condition. You’ll find a different purpose in life and there is far more to aviation than being in the front of the airplane.
 
jetmatt777
Posts: 4714
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 2:16 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 5:10 pm

Might I also recommend seeing a therapist.

Your anger towards airplanes is misguided. They didn’t cause your medical condition. Sometimes in this life you’re dealt a shit hand of cards. However, there’s always someone else who has an even worse hand who would trade everything to have your stack of cards. Aviation didn’t betray you. And you should seek some counseling on how to digest what has happened without resorting to anger.
 
GalaxyFlyer
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:04 pm

There’s limitless ways to be involved in aviation without being a pilot, in fact, many will be more rewarding than sitting for hours watching the boring undercast roll by.

GF
 
buzzard302
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 22, 2018 11:04 pm

Since you have an interest in math and physics, I highly recommend the engineering route. Allows you to be involved in design and testing and can be very rewarding. Your interests will return and you will find your way. I wish I was 19 and could do it all over again. Keep your head up and the right things will happen for you.
 
426Shadow
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Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2007 8:13 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 12:43 am

And besides what everyone else said, if you have the money to become a pilot (or you have the good credit for loans?) then why not invest in a good strong computer, an Oculus Rift headset, some Saitek flight controls and a copy of P3D or X-Plane and do it like the millions of us who for one reason or another can't realistically live the dream. There is a very large flight simulator community with all the bells and whistles you can imagine from live ATC to airline schedule's or just shooting the shitake with some buddies in the virtual skies. All is not lost.
 
dr1980
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 2:08 am

I feel your pain, I was a giant airplane geek growing up (and still am). I always wanted to be a pilot, unfortunately Type 1 Diabetes killed any chance of me passing a medical. I’m in my late 30’s now and have a great career outside aviation working as an executive in the public transportation industry (I was also a bus and train nerd growing up, so that worked out).

I’ll be honest, there are still times I get bitter that I couldn’t follow my dream for a reason beyond my control. When this happens, I have to take a step back and remember that I’m still living a great and productive life given the hand I was dealt. Having outlets like flight simulator and forums like this help a lot...I spend and incredible amount of time flying virtual aircraft and as suggested above I’ve spent all the money that would otherwise go to renting cessnas on flightsim addons, giving me as good of an experience as possible.

Another thing I’ve realized, though I enjoy my work, working in the public transport industry day in and day out has pretty much destroyed my nerdish love of buses and trains. Part of my wonders if I had become a pilot would I still have the passion for aviation that I do now? No way to know for sure. I’ve thought about maybe trying to make the leap to either airport management or airline management, but part of me does worry that working in the industry could diminish my nerdy love for it.

I know it’s probably hard for you to believe at this point, but things will work out. My wife (the eternal optimist in our relationship) frequently tells me (the pessimist or in my view realist in our relationship) that things will work out, and though in the moment it’s hard for me to believe her, she’s usually right (I can write that here as she doesn’t read these forums) :)
 
buzzard302
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 2:37 am

dr1980 wrote:
Another thing I’ve realized, though I enjoy my work, working in the public transport industry day in and day out has pretty much destroyed my nerdish love of buses and trains. Part of my wonders if I had become a pilot would I still have the passion for aviation that I do now? No way to know for sure. I’ve thought about maybe trying to make the leap to either airport management or airline management, but part of me does worry that working in the industry could diminish my nerdy love for it.


This for sure. I work in the marine industry and am involved in big luxurious yachts and high tech commercial vessels. After a while, you lose the love for some of these things when it is a 10 hour a day job. I mean, the technology is awesome, but everything loses it's luster after a while. Perhaps this is a blessing in disguise for you.
 
sadboy350
Topic Author
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Aug 21, 2018 8:37 pm

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 2:11 pm

Thank you for your really really friendly and supportive comments. I am already fine with the fact I can't be a pilot, but I still just can't do anything aviation related. Not even consider an alternative career, even though I would want to. It screws me up since it meant so much to me! The only thing I was ever waiting for was my flight trips and now all the glamour is gone. I am scared it was just a phase and I loved it all just because I was so certain about becoming a pilot. I wish I never wanted to become a pilot so I could have kept it just as a hobby and continue it. Now I can't no neither of them.
 
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keesje
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Re: I can't be a pilot. Koo

Thu Aug 23, 2018 6:00 pm

.
Last edited by keesje on Thu Aug 23, 2018 6:05 pm, edited 3 times in total.
 
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keesje
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 6:02 pm

You will be in aviation, there's tons of exiting jobs & companies you don't know. Aero Engineering is great investment if you can do it. Also if you won't be an engineer. Reboot & move on, w're waiting for you. :bigthumbsup:
 
amishfarmer
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed May 30, 2018 2:37 pm

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 8:47 pm

Do not forget that UAV's are becoming more an d more prevalent. If you can get your seizures under control you may be able to go that route as well. I understand you won't be in the air but you are a pilot and I know border control and other agencies are in dire need of remote pilots.
 
meecrob
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Aug 23, 2018 10:19 pm

sadboy350 wrote:
I didn't even look at girls since all I thought about was planes


There's your problem right there. It doesn't have to be women, but its not healthy to obsess over something too much, you are just going through withdrawal right now. I think you mentioned you are 19. I'm 34 and I hate to sound like a grandpa, but you will look back and feel silly. It will take time, but at least keep a poster of a plane on your wall. It might piss you off now, but when you are older you will feel proud of what you accomplished. Whatever you do in the future, aviation related or not, it takes a special kind of person to have the drive to even accomplish what you have already accomplished and it has already set you on a good course in life. Look at it this way. You have a medical condition. Most student pilots just suck and literally do not put in the effort to achieve their goal. You got dealt a very crappy hand and that has nothing to do with your integrity, intelligence or drive.
 
futureualpilot
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Mon Aug 27, 2018 12:03 am

I am truly sorry that your life has taken an unexpected turn. I too wanted nothing more than to be a pilot. It sounds like you are going through the stages of grief which is completely normal for someone dealing with such a significant blow. Give it time. You don’t have to rush into something right away, take care of yourself and spend time with the people you care about. You will find another direction, be it in aviation or in another field. There is still a world of opportunity available to you within the community. It’s sucks to have to shift gears but you can do this so long as you understand the world will go on. Make the choice every day to remain a part of it, to participate and to give yourself time to find your new center and move forward with that.

Again, I am truly sorry. No words will make this better but time will. Hang in there with us.
 
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LaunchDetected
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Mon Aug 27, 2018 7:11 am

sadboy350 wrote:
I was known as the crazy plane boy in my college and I didn't even look at girls since all I thought about was planes,


That's the problem, as said above, it's never healthy to be so obsessed. Maybe it will teach you a lesson the hard way. There is a lot of good things in every situation, maybe you are heartbroken right now but you will forgot it soon, you are young (me too). Sorry for your medical condition, you have nothing to regret as it's clearly not your fault.

I would also add that having a job in the field that you love the most is not necesseraly a good idea. I have multiple hobbies so we are different, but i work for a famous aircraft manufacturer, and when you wake up every morning at 6AM to see some planes, the magic disappear a little bit more each year. It's important to have several pastimes and interests. And don't forget that if you love aviation, there is a lot of jobs around aircrafts (with better salary and work condition, something you maybe don't realize now).
 
mdavies06
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Mon Aug 27, 2018 11:54 am

I was determined to be a pilot but it all stopped when I did a Ishihara test and I failed spectacularly. Then I switched to another field in science and I haven't regretted it. You should look forward to a non pilot field. There are many great careers out there.
 
dangle
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Mon Aug 27, 2018 7:48 pm

sadboy350 wrote:
Thank you for your really really friendly and supportive comments. I am already fine with the fact I can't be a pilot, but I still just can't do anything aviation related. Not even consider an alternative career, even though I would want to. It screws me up since it meant so much to me! The only thing I was ever waiting for was my flight trips and now all the glamour is gone. I am scared it was just a phase and I loved it all just because I was so certain about becoming a pilot. I wish I never wanted to become a pilot so I could have kept it just as a hobby and continue it. Now I can't no neither of them.


Like everyone else on this thread, I feel for your loss even though we've never met. I'm glad you've seen on this thread how other 'strangers' will readily support you in this life out of compassion for their fellow humans.

I'm being presumptuous, but probably some or many of us on this thread are in later stages of life than you, and can remember how badly we've felt earlier in our lives when a dream couldn't coexist with reality. Many people are highly motivated to help young people have good lives, so never stop looking for people like that to help you as you adapt to your health condition and find your place in the world.

Please keep focusing on your health. While I can't give you specific medical advice, I can make the general comment that many people with epilepsy are able to obtain excellent seizure control, but it can be a long process. Find a neurologist you trust and work with them towards this goal.

Finally, please reach out to anyone you trust, especially your neurologist, if you find yourself losing your perspective on the value of your life as you make this big adjustment (since some of the meds can make some people feel badly, but that can be fixed). I don't want to dwell on the negative, I just want you to create your emergency back up plan for if you begin to feel worse.

Sorry if my reply is too personal, and thanks for sharing your experience with us.

Best regards.
 
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trpmb6
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Mon Aug 27, 2018 8:13 pm

A thought occurred to me. It would be incredible noble of you to pursue a path that resulted in you finding a way for those with epilepsy to eventually fly. May not necessarily be a catch all cure. Could be a device of some sort. Etc.

Re-focus your passion into solving the problem and maybe you could even fly yourself one day.
 
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CarlosSi
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Tue Aug 28, 2018 5:42 am

Just be careful with engineering as others have suggested; it's a good route and all, but I did it and half-hated it (mostly frustration with getting things figured out and creativity). Not easy and don't try to force yourself to do it. Not a good place to end up if you graduate and have no job as a result of your own apathy, however most people do well and are employed. I'm one of the few exceptions. I too liked math and science... I don't know what went wrong.

If I'd have to do anything else aviation related I'd probably work as a flight attendant or become a controller if the latter is do-able with your condition, as it feels like you're in the same space as pilots (you are! Just not in the air).
 
snasteve
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Joined: Sun Dec 01, 2013 1:58 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Aug 29, 2018 5:47 am

sadboy350 wrote:
I hate to even write this and writing this makes me burst into tears. Due to an intense epilepsy I can't be a commercial pilot. The disease was found a 2 months ago. Since then, my life has lost its purpose. I was living and breathing aviation. I had been searching for my passion all my life and found it when I was 12 - aviation. I know it was it, I had never been so passionate about anything. Now I am 19 and all of it is gone. I devoted all my life for my dream of becoming a commercial pilot. I became a nerd in maths and physics, took up sports, I was all set to become a pilot. I was known as the crazy plane boy in my college and I didn't even look at girls since all I thought about was planes, aviation and my dream! It was the sole purpose of my life! And then suddenly - I started getting those really bad seizures. Then diagnosed with epilepsy.

The worst part is now that I have lost ALL my love in aviation. I have tried some spotting, went on a trip, but it's not the same. It just isn't. Planes are just a reminder of a dream never to become true. Now when I see a plane, I feel anger. At the moment I can't even consider a career elsewhere in aviation even though my parents keep me telling to do so. The whole damn passion has just betrayed me. I have tried to read articles about aviation, watch photos of planes, just force myself to like it. But I can't. The fact that all of it is gone now tears me apart every second. There's nothing that I have loved more in the world than aviation, but I just can't take it anymore! In addition, my identity is gone now, too. I am just a depressed, frustrated boy who's interested in NOTHING. What can I do anymore? Aviation was the only thing in my life I didn't have to force myself to like. (unless now.) Other things - football, video games, cars - were just something I liked because everyone else did too.

I have never been this lost in my life.


I inherited a rare type of hearing loss, where the loss is mostly in the lower frequencies, although I can hear higher frequencies quite well. Unfortunately this type of loss make the radios in aircraft unintelligible to my ears even with a hearing aide. I had always wanted to be a pilot so this was quite disappointing. Don't give up, try to do something related to the field if you can, that way you're nearer to what makes you happy.

I spent ten years in a Brokerage firm and although it probably paid way more than a Pilot, I was miserable and unhappy. I wish and can see now that although I couldn't be a pilot I could have done something else aviation related.

Sorry about your situation, my sister has epilepsy too, she's a school teacher and even with the meds she will still sometimes have bouts of unpredictable seizures. Once was so bad she had her driver license suspended for a year, Here in California, anything like that is reported to the DMV and they take your license. It's for the best, but it no car is no fun. Now having seen what she's dealt with it makes my problems seem minor. I wish you the best.
 
SkiyaninVannin
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sat Sep 01, 2018 5:56 am

Many of us here will have had the piloting dream. My own was probably not as intense, but I too had to accept I would never fly for a living. As a teen I was borderline obsessed - I read all I could, I managed to wrangle time in light aircraft, I even wrote off to various airlines and ended up spending an afternoon with a chief pilot in a simulator. All I can suggest is to try and find purpose in what you do, regardless of which field it is. There are a great many occupations and jobs which add to our society, even in places you would least expect. Don't fall into the trap of stereotyping people or livelihoods. Your role on this earth is to be productive, to achieve things and to help others. Flying for a living ticks those boxes nicely, but it's only one of many.
 
stratclub
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sat Sep 01, 2018 12:33 pm

May I suggest you just suck it up buttercup? Life on life's terms. Although I would have loved to have been a commercial airplane driver, my eyesight makes that impossible. Instead, I have had a very rewarding career as an Aviation Maintenance Technician. (Now Retired)

Seriously, don't waste your time on things you cannot do, and concentrate on things you can do. And if you think about it, being an airplane driver has got to be one of the most boring jobs around. Just sitting there and waiting for the airplane to figure out a way to ruin your day. :banghead:
 
stratclub
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sat Sep 01, 2018 1:38 pm

trpmb6 wrote:
A thought occurred to me. It would be incredible noble of you to pursue a path that resulted in you finding a way for those with epilepsy to eventually fly. May not necessarily be a catch all cure. Could be a device of some sort. Etc.

Re-focus your passion into solving the problem and maybe you could even fly yourself one day.

Please. That is just so condescending. I could not imagine the flying public putting their lives in the hands of someone not fit to command an aircraft. I would have been an exceptional pilot except my eyesight would not allow it. Above all else, the safety of the flying public is job one for us professionals and if I can't meet the requirements to command an aircraft I will not put anyone at risk by trying to.

This is not a Special Olympic exercise where everyone gets a prize, it is an an exercise in life on life's terms.
 
N766UA
Posts: 8400
Joined: Thu Jul 29, 1999 3:50 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sat Sep 01, 2018 8:53 pm

Hey, now you get to be home every night, eat your own food, have normal relationships with people, sleep well, have a dog, have a shot at a marriage that doesn’t end in divorce, have a regular schedule that doesn’t constantly mess with your internal clock... you won’t have 5AM ready reserve, you won’t have to commute or try to take a shower in a crash pad... maybe now you can even secure a pension or decent health insurance.

You’re not missing out as badly as you think you are.

“I haven’t been this lost in all my life.” Dude, I’m not trying to be condescending, but you’re 19. You haven’t had a life yet. Go through your 5 steps, refocus, and go make one for yourself.
 
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trpmb6
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Tue Sep 04, 2018 12:40 pm

stratclub wrote:
trpmb6 wrote:
A thought occurred to me. It would be incredible noble of you to pursue a path that resulted in you finding a way for those with epilepsy to eventually fly. May not necessarily be a catch all cure. Could be a device of some sort. Etc.

Re-focus your passion into solving the problem and maybe you could even fly yourself one day.

Please. That is just so condescending. I could not imagine the flying public putting their lives in the hands of someone not fit to command an aircraft. I would have been an exceptional pilot except my eyesight would not allow it. Above all else, the safety of the flying public is job one for us professionals and if I can't meet the requirements to command an aircraft I will not put anyone at risk by trying to.

This is not a Special Olympic exercise where everyone gets a prize, it is an an exercise in life on life's terms.


It used to be that eyesight issues would preclude people from flying. For instance, the air force used to prevent people with eye surgeries from flying. They've since relieved those restrictions because different eye corrective surgeries have improved that much.

I don't know how anyone can interpret what I said to be condescending. Many advances in the medical field occur because of someone who found themselves unable to pursue their preferred field of expertise due to a medical issue.
 
cpd
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Re: I can't be a pilot.

Tue Sep 04, 2018 5:57 pm

sadboy350 wrote:
I hate to even write this and writing this makes me burst into tears. Due to an intense epilepsy I can't be a commercial pilot. The disease was found a 2 months ago. Since then, my life has lost its purpose. I was living and breathing aviation. I had been searching for my passion all my life and found it when I was 12 - aviation. I know it was it, I had never been so passionate about anything. Now I am 19 and all of it is gone. I devoted all my life for my dream of becoming a commercial pilot. I became a nerd in maths and physics, took up sports, I was all set to become a pilot. I was known as the crazy plane boy in my college and I didn't even look at girls since all I thought about was planes, aviation and my dream! It was the sole purpose of my life! And then suddenly - I started getting those really bad seizures. Then diagnosed with epilepsy.

The worst part is now that I have lost ALL my love in aviation. I have tried some spotting, went on a trip, but it's not the same. It just isn't. Planes are just a reminder of a dream never to become true. Now when I see a plane, I feel anger. At the moment I can't even consider a career elsewhere in aviation even though my parents keep me telling to do so. The whole damn passion has just betrayed me. I have tried to read articles about aviation, watch photos of planes, just force myself to like it. But I can't. The fact that all of it is gone now tears me apart every second. There's nothing that I have loved more in the world than aviation, but I just can't take it anymore! In addition, my identity is gone now, too. I am just a depressed, frustrated boy who's interested in NOTHING. What can I do anymore? Aviation was the only thing in my life I didn't have to force myself to like. (unless now.) Other things - football, video games, cars - were just something I liked because everyone else did too.

I have never been this lost in my life.


There are many other things in life. The career path you eventually find might be more satisfying. You just don't know it yet.

Many years ago I lived and breathed photography, it was the thing. But over time the thing I loved doing gradually became something I lost interest in.

I didn't know back then that I'd start riding bicycles and end up loving that, even riding up and down huge mountains in Europe.

It was just something that happened by chance.

The point is, don't despair, something else will come along.
 
stratclub
Posts: 1382
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2018 10:38 pm

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Wed Sep 05, 2018 1:33 pm

trpmb6 wrote:
stratclub wrote:
trpmb6 wrote:
A thought occurred to me. It would be incredible noble of you to pursue a path that resulted in you finding a way for those with epilepsy to eventually fly. May not necessarily be a catch all cure. Could be a device of some sort. Etc.

Re-focus your passion into solving the problem and maybe you could even fly yourself one day.

Please. That is just so condescending. I could not imagine the flying public putting their lives in the hands of someone not fit to command an aircraft. I would have been an exceptional pilot except my eyesight would not allow it. Above all else, the safety of the flying public is job one for us professionals and if I can't meet the requirements to command an aircraft I will not put anyone at risk by trying to.

This is not a Special Olympic exercise where everyone gets a prize, it is an an exercise in life on life's terms.


It used to be that eyesight issues would preclude people from flying. For instance, the air force used to prevent people with eye surgeries from flying. They've since relieved those restrictions because different eye corrective surgeries have improved that much.

I don't know how anyone can interpret what I said to be condescending. Many advances in the medical field occur because of someone who found themselves unable to pursue their preferred field of expertise due to a medical issue.

Sorry, I was a little harsh, wasn't I? I probably read more into your post than what you were relating to.You would be correct though. At some point medical science could make his condition controllable to were he could safely fly an aircraft.

In my case I understand my eyesight limitations very well from personal flying experience with others and I would be a menace flying in a TCA were it is vital to clearly see the aircraft you are sharing airspace with. Maybe I'm a little bitter about my limitation, I guess so I do understand the OP's frustration.
 
B777LRF
Posts: 2885
Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2008 4:23 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Fri Sep 07, 2018 10:25 am

'Seeing a therapist', what, because life didn't turn out quite the way someone expected it to? Perhaps it's an American thing seeing a therapist whenever something's slightly amiss, but in my neck of the woods a 'therapist' is someone you see when you have serious psychological issues - not just because you can't get the job you dreamed of.

But, fear not, you've lucked out of entering a career which is in a perpetual downward spiral for its employees. Unless you get to fly a Twotter on floats in the Indian ocean, all the fun of the job went out the outflow valves a long time ago. These days it's highly stressful, FTL limits seen as goals rather than restrictions, little appreciation and declining terms and conditions which are the hallmarks of being an airline pilot. I know, I used to be one and had to give it up when I lost my medical. Didn't see a therapist over that, rather sulked for a week or two before I set new goals for myself.

If you want to fly for the fun of it, join a glider club - the medical requirements are much easier to satisfy. And the flying is actually fun, on your own terms and in your own time. Flying gliders is, and this may come as a surpise to many enthusiasts on this site, much more fun and rewarding than a 757. I know, I've flown both and still fly gliders. Of course you can't make a living off it, but that's the whole point: Make your money elsewhere and spend them flying gliders for fun.
 
jetmatt777
Posts: 4714
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 2:16 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Fri Sep 07, 2018 12:13 pm

B777LRF wrote:
'Seeing a therapist', what, because life didn't turn out quite the way someone expected it to? Perhaps it's an American thing seeing a therapist whenever something's slightly amiss, but in my neck of the woods a 'therapist' is someone you see when you have serious psychological issues - not just because you can't get the job you dreamed of.

But, fear not, you've lucked out of entering a career which is in a perpetual downward spiral for its employees. Unless you get to fly a Twotter on floats in the Indian ocean, all the fun of the job went out the outflow valves a long time ago. These days it's highly stressful, FTL limits seen as goals rather than restrictions, little appreciation and declining terms and conditions which are the hallmarks of being an airline pilot. I know, I used to be one and had to give it up when I lost my medical. Didn't see a therapist over that, rather sulked for a week or two before I set new goals for myself.

If you want to fly for the fun of it, join a glider club - the medical requirements are much easier to satisfy. And the flying is actually fun, on your own terms and in your own time. Flying gliders is, and this may come as a surpise to many enthusiasts on this site, much more fun and rewarding than a 757. I know, I've flown both and still fly gliders. Of course you can't make a living off it, but that's the whole point: Make your money elsewhere and spend them flying gliders for fun.



Um, yeah. Seeing a therapist is very rewarding. You don’t have to be crazy to see one. They offer a place free of judgment to express your thoughts, and it’s often times (In my experience) that just hearing yourself talk about and explain your troubles is all you need. You can self diagnose, and they listen and can steer the conversation in a productive manner.

It’s not just for crazy people. We all have knots in our personalities that we should untangle. Some of us just have a few small simple nots, others have complex headphone cord type knots. I’d recommend anyone to see one whether they think they need to or not. It has been very helpful for me to learn of my thought process.

It can be a learning tool just as much as it can be a medical solution.
 
EasternSon
Posts: 673
Joined: Fri Jun 02, 2006 10:07 pm

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Fri Sep 07, 2018 1:24 pm

I've been working in aviation for 18 years. I'm not a pilot. There are an infinite number of ways that you can have a career in aviation and never pilot an aircraft.I get to crawl around in the inside of aircraft, fly in simulators, travel the world, and meet people who love to talk about planes.
Dude, don't give up, your passion can still be your career.
 
DashTrash
Posts: 1337
Joined: Mon Aug 21, 2006 8:44 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sat Sep 08, 2018 3:56 pm

N766UA wrote:
Hey, now you get to be home every night, eat your own food, have normal relationships with people, sleep well, have a dog, have a shot at a marriage that doesn’t end in divorce, have a regular schedule that doesn’t constantly mess with your internal clock... you won’t have 5AM ready reserve, you won’t have to commute or try to take a shower in a crash pad... maybe now you can even secure a pension or decent health insurance.

You’re not missing out as badly as you think you are.

“I haven’t been this lost in all my life.” Dude, I’m not trying to be condescending, but you’re 19. You haven’t had a life yet. Go through your 5 steps, refocus, and go make one for yourself.

That post was a little harsh, but also spot on. I haven’t been home for Christmas, Thanksgiving, Independence Day and miss a lot of family time due to my career. I’ve had to call repairman for simple household fixes and have heard “dad, when are you coming home” when I was already supposed to be there. You’re not going to have to deal with that crap. I wish I didn’t.... Not to mention the impending divorce that was set into motion years ago when I was furloughed and all of a sudden found out the time on the road masked the Incompatibility.

When one door closes, another opens. A job doesn’t define a person.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
CanadianNorth
Posts: 3287
Joined: Sat Aug 24, 2002 11:41 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sun Sep 09, 2018 11:52 am

I'd say don't give up on aviation entirely, as others have said I'm fairly confident the aviation bug will return if given even the slightest chance.

Best advise I can think of is take a break and go play with something else for a while. Another user farther up had a good idea as well, while your doing that keep a poster on the wall or a model on the shelf or something, nothing crazy but a little something. I like airplanes too but it'l be better for your mental and physical health on so many levels to have more than one interest. I still like my career in aviation but honestly now that I'm several years in I do have the occasional week where I just can't wait to go home and do something else for a couple days. Variety will be good for you.

As for the aviation bug returning, there are a billion different aviation careers that can be a good time. As an aircraft maintenance engineer here's just a sample of what I get to do:
- I get paid to play with airplanes all day. Pilots usually get one airplane for the day, and usually fly the same type for months sometimes years on end, meanwhile I often get to have my hands on several different types in one shift.
- I get to explore and learn a bunch of areas of the airplane. I get to see how the engines work, have close up slow motion views of the gear going up and down, pop an overwing exit and go for a walk on the wing, all in a days work.
- I get to play with a lot of different departments and tasks. My main job is aircraft maintenance of course but I also over the years have learned to drive fuel truck, do most of the ramp and grooming tasks, and a million other things I'd be here till christmas writing down. As an added bonus you get to meet and work with some really great people in the process. There is so much that goes into running an airline when you're actually involved in the day to day operations it's pretty hard not to meet at least a couple people you can get along with an go for beers after.
- We still get to do engine runs and taxi the airplanes.
- I've had training sessions in the big full motion simulators.
- 9/10 nights I get to go home and sleep in my own bed, but the other few I do get to go on some pretty cool work trips. I actually pretty rarely travel far on my own time and money now because work pays me to go enough places to satisfy most of my travel desire. It really is a nice feeling to sit in the jumpseat with your morning coffee in hand, knowing that you've got 80 people on board who paid good money for the tour meanwhile you're getting paid to go on the same tour and scored a front row seat too.
 
CanadianNorth
Posts: 3287
Joined: Sat Aug 24, 2002 11:41 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Sun Sep 09, 2018 6:31 pm

Just some follow up to my previous post...

As I said there are probably a million different career paths involved with commercial aviation, far more than even the most observant of passengers would think of.

We're just a small airline and even for us our pilots and flight attendants are actually a pretty small portion of the work force. Here's a list of jobs just off the top of my head, there's many others.
- Aircraft mechanics and maintenance engineers
- Engineering
- Quality Assurance
- Interior maintenance
- Building maintenance
- Ground service equipment maintenance
- Passenger service agents
- Cargo agents
- Ramp
- Catering
- Aircraft cleaning
- Reservations
- Marketing
- Human Resources
- Accounting
- Training
- IT department
- Safety department
- Aircraft refuelling
- Operations
- Charter coordinators
- Uniforms

Also there are many airport jobs not tied to any specific airline. Many are govy jobs so pay decently with good benefits too...
- Air traffic control
- Weather
- Flight services (the experts for filing flight plans, weather, that sort of thing)
- Airport maintenance (snow plowing, lawn mowing, those guys stay on top of a lot of things)
- Airport management and planning
- Building maintenance
- Security
- Electricians (fixing runway lights, ILS systems, all that fun stuff)

Some other ideas as well...
- Aircraft design and manufacturing
- Working for Transport Canada or FAA or equivalent
- Maybe a journey host for a tour company that flies a lot


Point is, there's just soooo much more to aviation than what you'd ever see from the cockpit.
 
SuperAzusa
Posts: 20
Joined: Fri Aug 31, 2018 10:55 am

Re: I can't be a pilot.

Thu Sep 13, 2018 10:18 am

I totally know your feeling

my entire family is military. my dad in particular always wanted to be a pilot but wasn't smart enough so he went navy. but it his dream to fly the F-4 (or was it F-5). Since he always collected a ton of military magazines and books, I've always went through them as a kid in awe. while I liked Tanks, aviation was the most interesting. It was also the era of Top Gun, so naval aviation interested me the most.
So my dad would always tell me what to study in order to be a good pilot, so I did just that.

As I got older, I developed a stronger interest in civilian aviation and was attracted to transition to civilian life after the military. So around high school, my plan was to try and fly tanker or awacs aircraft, then transition to airlines. It seemed all set. Then when finally eligible, the military said I was smart enough and passed everything but I had an eye condition I totally did not know about. So I could not become a pilot. That really shot down my dreams.

I went through several months searching for a new identity.. but like others said, there are other ways around it. I ended up going into civil engineering, and now I'm working on a project on airport construction! so now I've came back to aviation.. just on a different end.

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